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Dean was always the big spoon, he was used to it, it’d been that way since the very first time that Sam had crawled into his bed when he was only two years old after a nightmare and asked for Dean to protect him from the monsters, how could he say no, not while John was off somewhere hunting the real monsters leaving Dean to protect Sam from his imaginary ones.
He liked being the big spoon it made him feel big and strong like Sam’s hero and then later on when he got too old to come to his big Brother for cuddles, Dean could always be some girls knight in shining armour for the night hold her close and keep her safe and when he finally came to terms with the fact that he liked men too on occasions he could be their prince charming and protector instead.
Over the years Dean had gotten better at physical affection largely in part due to Castiel. For so long he was desperate to touch him that he would do whatever he could to be close to him, whether it was walking close enough that their arms brushed together or pretending that a booth was smaller than it actually was so that he would have to squish up against him, he lost count of the number of times that he would touch his hand reaching for something and wait longer than he should of to move away.
Eventually he actually grew to like being hugged and not just by Castiel but by Sam and Bobby too then Jack when he came along, but Cas’s hugs were still the best after all he was the original Huggy Bear, Sam looked at him so strangely when he first called him that on the phone but it was the perfect nickname for his Angel, who could be so angry at the world but then turn it around to be gentle and loving with him.
Dean squirmed in Castiel’s arms being hugged was one thing he felt comfortable with that he even enjoyed that but this was different laying down and being held in strong protective arms should make him feel safe and loved because it’s Cas but, mostly it was just putting him outside of his comfort zone.
“Stop moving Dean.”
Cas’s voice was stern but full of warmth and affection for him.
“You sure you don’t want me to hold you instead?”
“No Dean.”
Castiel held him closer placing a palm to his chest over his heart he was certain that it was beating faster than it should be right now given that he wasn’t in any danger, Cas nuzzled into his neck.
Oh, that’s actually kind of nice.
Dean was pleasantly surprised to find himself relaxing into Castiel’s warm arms, his steady breath against his neck strangely soothing even as it ruffled his hair, the next time he moved it was to push himself back closer to Castiel.
Cas didn’t say a word this time relieved to see his boyfriend finally starting to relax into his arms and allow himself to be held for once, how many times had he needed this before and never been given the opportunity?
Dean’s shoulders were still tense tucked up to his ears, Cas’s hand on his waist and the other against his heart, his soft breaths on his neck gradually had them relaxing almost like a weight had been lifted from them, he didn’t expect to like this as much as he was.
Before long he found it harder and harder to keep his eyes open.
Was this how he always made everyone else feel safe and protected and loved?
He could get used to this, he didn’t expect to drift off in Cas’s arms let alone to wake up a few hours later still lying together and being held.
“Hello Dean”
“Heya Sunshine”
“Sleep well?”
He’s surprised to say that he did he slept better than he had in years.