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It was too cold to be sitting in the sand by the shore, especially considering the fire that was blazing twenty yards behind her. October was cold. Halloween was colder. Within the next few weeks, they would see the first snowfall of the year. A flannel blanket was wrapped around her shoulders that she tugged a little closer to her body when the wind blew, sending a chill straight down her spine. The waves were lapping at the shore and she watched them intently while digging the heels of her boots into the white granules of sand.
All of her friends were piss drunk and raging, dancing and stumbling around the bonfire with too much energy for as late a night it was. Or as early considering that the sun would begin to rise within the next half hour. By then, she figured they would all be passed out in backseats and tents, snoozing the alcohol from their systems until they were safe to drive. Aelin herself was sobering up, hardly any of the bubbles of drunken delusion left in her bloodstream. She couldn’t say the same about anyone else, though.
To her left, she picked up on heavy footsteps trudging through the sand and a heavy body dropping down next to her soon after. Part of another blanket was slung around her shoulders as Rowan scooted a bit closer to her, pulling the other side of the blanket around his shoulders. When he leaned back on his hand, Aelin wormed her way over until they were pressed together, the golden blonde leeching the warmth from his side. She inhaled deeply, relishing in the musky pine scent that she associated solely with Rowan and couldn’t help but notice the cinnamon whiskey that laced his breath as his chin bumped against her forehead.
Rowan and Aelin had been friends for 547 days and she had been in love with him for every single one of them. Rowan, however, had just lost his fiancee when the two had met. There had been a horrible car accident that Lyria hadn’t walked away from. Aelin hadn’t known that until a few weeks ago, though. Nobody had talked about it, nobody had brought it up. Rowan certainly hadn’t, until the one year anniversary of her passing was upon them. Aelin hadn’t seen anyone so broken since January, when she’d stared at her reflection in the mirror and mourned the four year anniversary of losing Sam.
Beside her, Rowan shifted slightly and she tilted her head to look up at him. His green eyes were blazing and bloodshot as he lifted a hand to tuck her hair behind her ear. She followed his eyes with hers while they traced her face, dipped down to her lips then up to her eyes. Rowan licked his lips and the sweet whiskey on his breath kissed her face. Aelin’s eyes fell closed.
“Can I tell you something?” He asked her quietly, voice barely above a whisper. When he was drunk, the lilt of his accent was much heavier. Tell came out more like teel and you came out ye.
“Yes.” At the sound of her voice, Rowan’s eyes closed and he took a deep breath and Aelin couldn’t help but gulp down some of the salty air herself. Her eyes, though, never strayed from his face. When he looked at her again, his pupils were blown wide. Because he was drunk or from desire, she didn’t know.
“When I met you,” he started, the I sounding more like ah, “I was in a dark place that I couldn’t quite pull myself out of. Did you know today is exactly a year and a half to the day we met? I’d heard your voice clear as a bell when it felt like I’d been wandering through my life with everything muffled. Sound and feelings and just… everything about me was muted. But I heard you. And when I’d looked up from the table and I saw you standing next to Fenrys my heart stuttered and stopped in my chest, completely, I swear on it. It’s like…”
“Like what?” She asked, turning to face him fully. With the blanket still snug around their shoulders, it made her sit so close that, to be comfortable, she had draped one of her legs over his lap. Rowan’s finger traced down the inseam of her jeans, following the stitching to her ankle before running it back up to her knee.
“You were like coming up for fresh air.” There was a small smile on his lips as he swirled his finger around her kneecap. A smile that grew wider when he looked over at her. “It’s like I was drowning and you saved me.”
The world stopped spinning. Time stopped. The sun halted in its path where it had just begun to peak up over the horizon, reflecting hues of pink and orange and purple over the glassy water before them. Aelin bit her lip, fully convinced that her blood had even frozen in place at his admission.
“You’re drunk,” was somehow the first thing that came out of her mouth, but Rowan merely laughed.
“Aye, but sober I could never get the words quite right every time I wanted to tell you. And trust me, there have been many times that I’ve wanted to tell you.”
“Tell me what?” At some point, and she didn’t know when, she had lifted her fingers to trace down his jaw. Currently, a finger was following the curve of his cupids bow, slowing when he kissed her fingertips, her palm, then the inside of her wrist.
“That I’m in love with you, Aelin Galathynius.”
Desire, then. It was desire making his pupils swallow up his irises, that was giving him such a look of hunger that she couldn’t help herself when she leaned forward to kiss him on the mouth. She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, his hand cupping her jaw and her arms slipping around his waist.
After awhile, though, she pulled back and bit her kiss-swollen lips and laid her head on his chest. Her fingers slipped under his t-shirt to press against his warm skin and Rowan didn’t shy from her frost-bitten fingers even for a second. Instead, he kissed her on the head and pulled her closer, sand slipping under the waistband of her jeans and she wanted to curse him for it but was completely unable.
Because watching the sun come up over the lake with Rowan’s arms wrapped around her threw her into such a state of bliss that she wanted to stay in this moment for just a little while longer.
~*~
It was early afternoon on November first, and Aelin Galathynius was freezing.
Last night, everyone had been out partying at the beach until the early hours of the morning when they all retired to their tents and cars for a few hours of sleep before driving back to the city. Aelin herself had only been asleep for a handful of hours, stirring when the hulking mass she was snuggled up to began to wake. When the sun reached directly overhead, it had become utterly impossible to shield their eyes from the bright wash of light that infiltrated their space despite how hard they both tried. Aelin had even resorted to burrowing her face between Rowan’s side and the sleeping bag which had tickled him enough that his bright laughter had roused her fully from sleep.
Now she was sitting on a log and staring at the embers that barely glowed while Rowan packed his tent and cooler into the back of his truck. She had come to the beach last night with Lysandra, who was nowhere to be found, and Rowan promised he would drive her home. Most of their friends had already gone home after sending texts to the group chat about how much fun it was and they couldn’t wait for the next one. Aelin had sent back a series of emojis to convey her love for her friends while she waited on Rowan, pocketing her phone as he trudged back over to her.
“Ready?” In the daylight without the heavy effects of alcohol, his accent was a little more subtle than it had been last night. She couldn’t stop hearing his words over and over in her mind and found herself on a carousel of thoughts: did he mean it, or was he just drunk? Had he meant to tell her? Had the kisses they shared until they fell asleep wrapped up in one another meant even a fraction to him what it meant to her? Aelin nodded and stood, hesitating a moment before taking his outstretched hand. There had been no kissing since they had woken up, save for the soft kiss he had dropped to the top of her head on his way out of the tent. How was she supposed to know if it meant anything at all? “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, why?” She looked up at him and noted how his green eyes were crystal clear and searching her face for any sign of anything being amiss. Rowan stopped walking in front of her, standing between her and the door to his truck. After a moment he leaned back against the green beast, taking her other hand in his and loosely hooking their fingers together. Aelin bit her lip and glanced out over the lake, squinting into the bright reflection of the sun.
“Because I know you, and I know that this little wrinkle right here,” he tapped between her eyebrows, “means something is wrong or you’re overthinking. So which one is it?”
Aelin huffed a laugh and looked down, eyes focusing on their laced hands. She could feel her heart pounding in her ears but she wasn’t quite sure if it was the hangover or the anxiety of bringing up everything he had said last night. Rowan’s thumb grazed over her knuckles and he lifted their linked fingers to turn her face to look at him. The worry line was still fixed between her brows, a permanent fixture since she’d woken up.
“Did you mean it?” She finally asked, her chest tightening at the thought that he might shake his head and retract each one of those precious words he’d said to her against a cotton candy sky. “Everything you said last night. Or this morning, whenever it was.” She tugged one of her hands away from his and ran her fingers through her hair. She tried to look away from him but he turned her face back to his again with a too-smug smile on his face.
“That’s what you’re worried about?”
“I don’t know! You haven’t brought it up today,” she said, feeling completely lame the wider his smile became.
“Did I need to tell you as soon as we woke up?” The teasing tone in his voice both irritated and warmed her soul all at once.
“Yes, actually, it would have been nice considering you were pretty plastered when you said it to begin with.” Aelin turned her nose up slightly and looked back out toward the water, doing her best to ignore the low rumble of a laugh that tumbled from his mouth. Her lips were threatening to betray her by pulling into a smile so she fought it, keeping her lips pursed tightly even as he leaned in to kiss each corner of her mouth.
“I love you,” he said softly, and her lips spread into a smile so wide that when he kissed her he was practically kissing her teeth. She wanted to fold those words up and keep them in her pocket forever. “And I’ll remind you now that you haven’t even told me you’re even remotely interested in me.”
“I’ve been in love with you since I met you. It’s embarrassing.”
“Good thing I came to my senses, aye?” Aelin laughed, her head falling back as he pressed another kiss to her lips.
“Aye,” she repeated, her laughter swallowed up by Rowan’s own as he dipped her and pressed a slow, lingering kiss to her lips. She could certainly get used to this.