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The sickly sweet smell of melted candy assaulted his senses. It brought back the taste of lemon, sour with a hint of bitterness encased in a coating of artificial sweeteners. Shen Jiu recalled the familiar taste on his tongue. It tasted like July.
Sticky and sweet at first, but the eventual tang of the residual bitterness would remain long after the passing of summer. A bitterness he knew was at the core of their tumultuous summer fling. Deluding himself with the thin shell of saccharine excitement of the moment, he had surrendered himself to the mercy of the heat.
Heat that would melt away and suffuse any remaining hint of wondrous honey that dripped from that seasoned tongue. And all that remained in its wake was the acrid reality of their actions.
Hands snaked around his waist and Shen Jiu decided moving was futile and let gravity do the work. The press of the firm chest on his back anchored him back to reality.
"What were you thinking about?" Lips pressed against his ears, those same hands on his waist began to massage the soft flesh in tandem with the rhythmic sway of the silver grass at their feet.
"Nothing," Shen Jiu hummed as he snuggled back into the unbearable heat that was Luo Binghe.
"Then, if it's nothing, shall we?"
Hidden under the rundown roof of an abandoned shed, Shen Jiu did not refuse Luo Binghe's advances.
The summer heat was unbearable and as his shirt was carelessly thrown aside, he relished in the momentary reprieve his skin felt at being freed from the tenacious cling of his clothes. But his freedom was short-lived, as fingers equally as scorching as the mid-summer sun roamed the expanse with fervent desire.
To Shen Jiu, summer meant an escape from his responsibilities. An escape from his dreadfully dull life. And every summer since that unfortunate one, he would douse himself and be set alight in the embers of Luo Binghe's lust. A lustful love that came once every year. A refuge from his dreary existence and into the arms of uncertain excitement.
Shen Jiu had never once expected anything back from his summer flings with Luo Binghe. Nestled deep inside the forest in the outskirts of town, it was an indulgent tryst that meant nothing more than a chase for a foolish thrill his life lacked. Nothing more. Or at least it was meant to be nothing more than that.
The two shared their heat and their breath without reserve, even as the air around them was sweltering. But not once did they share anything besides their wants. With only their names to call out in the throes of passion, the two never shared anything beyond that superficial familiarity.
They met by chance and they would part by chance. That was the plan.
Until Luo Binghe decided he wanted to put a name to their chance union.
"Come with me."
A simple request laden with promises of escape from the inevitable path laid out before Shen Jiu. From a family that had long since decided on his journey and destination.
Tempting was the offer but Shen Jiu had been beaten down enough to know nothing came so easily as that. "Why?"
Luo Binghe smiled as he put his clothes back on, not bothering to help Shen Jiu with his. And it wasn't like the other cared to have to his help either. "Because you want an out and so do I?"
"What could you possibly want an out from? You have the world at your fingertips." Shen Jiu watched on as Luo Binghe got fully dressed. The man would soon be going back to whatever hole he came from and Shen Jiu would continue to lie back down and sleep off the ache in his body while the breeze took away the unwanted heat from him.
"Did your research, did you?"
When Shen Jiu did not deign to give him a proper response, Luo Binghe sat down, arm propped up on his knee and watched Shen Jiu stretch on their makeshift bed.
"That's why you told me your real name, wasn't it? So I would get curious one day and look it up."
A hand reached out to brush away a lock of hair plastered on Shen Jiu's face with sweat. "Maybe."
"So why would you help me? It's not like we even really know each beyond this."
"Hmm, we don't. But isn't it enough that I know just how to make your body sing in ecstasy? We're quite compatible. It's hard to find."
Luo Binghe's reasoning was completely ignored by Shen Jiu, who chose to close his eyes and enjoy the fleeting cool breezes that would occasionally pass through. His life wasn't perfect but he wasn't about to leave one hell for another just out of desperation.
"You really like to make me work for everything don't you?" Luo Binghe gave an amused sigh and presented his next offer, "I'm sure you know well enough about the condition of my succession in the company."
As though he was already asleep, the man lying down atop the rumpled blanket was completely still. The wind was softly caressing his hair and Luo Binghe had the urge to play with those wilful strands.
"I get to the top with you by my side. We're already familiar with each other. I don't see a reason to look for a new spouse. And you get to leave this place and enjoy a life of luxury by my side." After a moment of deliberation, Luo Binghe added, "As my equal, of course."
"What if I refuse?" Shen Jiu was looking at Luo Binghe with an unreadable gaze. "You want to use me to get what you want. Because I'm convenient. And equals? Do you actually think I would believe that?"
"Alright, you caught me. I don't want any attachments. And you my dear, are a master at that. It's a good thing. As long as you don't get in my way, I won't get in yours. C'mon you won't get an offer as good as this a second time."
"How long?" Luo Binghe smiled as Shen Jiu cut right to the chase. Sentiments were something both of them detested.
"Two years. The first year to solidify my position. The second year for appearances. After that we can go our merry ways. Unfettered."
Shen Jiu finally decided to get up and make himself decent for the next round of negotiations. "How much will I be compensated among other things?"
He had no plans to depend on Luo Binghe, but Shen Jiu would be foolish to let such a chance slip right through his fingers. He didn't care what Luo Binghe did during their short tenure as a married couple. Like the man himself said, he didn't want attachments, neither did Shen Jiu. Once those two years were over, he would go and live as he pleased, he would no longer be needed to come back to this little town of his and play an obedient son to his loving guardians.
"Meet me here, tomorrow. I'll bring my lawyer and you can read through the contract."
"Before you do, I have a set of terms that will need to be fulfilled as well. Otherwise, we have no deal." Shen Jiu remarked and Luo Binghe humoured himself. "I'm sure you do, Baobei. Get used to that name by the way."
By the time Luo Binghe had gone off and he was once again alone with only his thoughts as company, Shen Jiu afforded himself a small smile. Anything to get out of that miserable place he called home. Even if it meant using Luo Binghe to get out. There was no harm in it. They were both, after all, using each other.
The same sweltering heat as that afternoon bore down on him as he sat under the dilapidated shed. The memories of the day vivid. Everything was still the same. Everything except for that ring on his finger. But soon, even that would return to the same.
As Shen Jiu played with the ring on his finger, sifting through the memories of their time together. Cold yet burning. Their bodies constantly burned for each other, but their hearts had always remained frozen to the touch. It didn't change then, and it wouldn't change now.
When did this all start? Shen Jiu rumminated to himself. The taste of sweet candy and bitter reality filled him. It started with that kiss. An escape from his reality.
Luo Binghe had tasted like sweet nectar in that moment, and Shen Jiu had lapped it all up in his thirst. Sweetness was something he did not know the taste of. And so, even with the bitter undertones, Shen Jiu believed that was what sweet honey should taste like.
Two strangers in the middle of the forest, each running away from their lives outside of the lush enclosure, found momentary solace in the fleeting embrace of the summer.
Luo Binghe sitting beneath the shade of the rotting roof, mindlessly putting sweetened hard candy one after the other into his waiting mouth. At some point, the candy had begun to melt and coated his fingers with the saccharine stickiness.
Shen Jiu could taste that nostalgic taste of tangy sweetness on his tongue long after they had pulled apart from their kiss. Warm hands caressing his cheeks as he drowned himself in the honeyed suckles. Hands that burned hotter than the summer heat. Despite all his words and resolve, that day was a day that Shen Jiu could never forget. If anything, he would crave that intoxicating taste of sugar every day, but it was never the same. The kisses that followed after grew more sour and bitter.
As he looked back to where Luo Binghe was sprawled out in their usual haunt, sleeping soundly, Shen Jiu played with the grass at his feet. They tickled, as if willing Shen Jiu to smile, but he never did.
Everything started under the uncertain safety of the roof above their heads. And everything would come to a close underneath it as well.
The two years were gone and not once did Shen Jiu get to enjoy that taste of candied kisses again.
Luo Binghe woke up to the sound of wrappers being noisily crinkled. Shen Jiu was by his feet, lounging around near the edge of the blanket as he rolled a candy in his mouth. The man loved sweets. Coveted them like a dragon would its hoard. But after every piece of those sweet delights he would eat, his face would scrunch up like he was eating the most sour food in existence.
He never questioned the ways of his husband, soon to be ex-husband he reminded himself. As promised, Luo Binghe would set him free after the two years were up. He would not get in his way. But watching Shen Jiu, shoulders bare to the hidden world, hugging his knees as he gnawed furiously on one sweet after the other, Luo Binghe had the urge to get in his way. To stop him from leaving. If only to keep himself entertained with Shen Jiu's antics, was his reason.
A futile attempt. Shen Jiu would refuse, as he always did. Luo Binghe had his chances to try, yet he never did in all those years. So even hoping for Shen Jiu to miraculously agree to his whims at the last moment was but a fanciful thought. The fact that Shen Jiu even agreed to come to this secret place of theirs was enough. This was the extent of Shen Jiu's tolerance of him and his wishes.
The weight of a jacket covering him brought Shen Jiu back to reality and the acidic aftertaste suffused his palate and he winced. He shrugged off the jacket, only for Luo Binghe to place it on him again with force.
"The wind's getting stronger and you'll catch a cold if you stay like that."
At Luo Binghe's concern, Shen Jiu chuckled mirthlessly. "Since when have you ever cared about such things?" Yet he didn't deny Luo Binghe's surprising and rare show of affection a second time.
"Maybe I've grown sentimental over the years." Shen Jiu outright laughed at Luo Binghe's face at the mere audacity. Luo Binghe followed him in his laughter and sat down to look around the place one last time before they parted ways for good.
"Where did it all go wrong?" Luo Binghe mused to himself at their predicament. Their union was unconventional, there was no doubt about that. But they had never fought nor argued once in all their time together. They respected each other's privacies and lives and did not ask for more than what was agreed upon. And perhaps that was the problem. They just existed in each other's world without truly living.
Perhaps if they had argued more, fought more, they would have some lingering emotions as they arrived to their end. Perhaps.
Shen Jiu beat him to his rhetorical question with a blade that was blunt and would leave numerous wounds that would fester long after they went their separate ways. "Nothing. There was nothing to go wrong in the first place. Not when nothing was ever right since the beginning."
"I guess that's true." Luo Binghe accepted it without contest. "We should get going. We have a big day ahead of us tomorrow. Lots of papers to sign."
"I've already signed everything. There's no need to meet again tomorrow." Shen Jiu did not look at Luo Binghe as he played with the wrappers in his fingers. The syrupy stretch of the sugar stuck to his skin like a lover unwilling to part. "Take your jacket."
The rustle of clothes behind him told him enough of Luo Binghe's motives. He would be leaving soon. As always. It was better to leave Shen Jiu to his devices like he had always done. Enacting a familiar play that would end the same way it started.
A hand, with heat dulled to a slow warmth turned him around as Luo Binghe leaned down to place a soft kiss to those sticky and shiny lips. The sour taste of lemon was chased away as the subtle sweetness of Luo Binghe's lips filled his senses.
That long forgotten summer memory came back and teased Shen Jiu of the taste he had since been chasing after. Of the tangy sweetness of July, sticky and sweet despite the hint of sour and bitter undercurrents. But it came a moment too late as Luo Binghe soon pulled away with a quiet whisper. "Keep it."
The grass at his feet licked his skin and as if to brush away his sorrow. For the first time, Shen Jiu smiled with none but the forest spectators as witness. He smiled for something he never knew he had, as tears rolled off his face. Luo Binghe's retreating shadow never glimpsed Shen Jiu's heart as the sun began to set on their sanctuary for the last time.