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His mother had an affair and he was okay with it. He was glad that he only found out now, when he was almost 17, because if he would have known back when he would have been 11 he would have hated her for it. He couldn’t really blame her for it, his father had admitted that he had cheated on her multiple times, and told Kenny to learn from his mistakes.
And even before his parents had finally divorced ( he had been 14 at that time, he had actually been relieved when they sat down with him and his siblings and once again had the “ we still love each other but we are getting a divorce” talk) he had noticed that his mom didn’t really love his dad, certainly not like Aunt Ruby loved her husband, Uncle Stan. God, Kenny used to be so embarrassed watching Ruby and Stan acting like two teenagers in love, though it was quite funny to see the look on Sara’s and Harry’s faces ( those two had to see that every day, poor guys). But his mom had never looked at his dad like he was the love of her life, no. She was smiling at him, sure, but she almost never kissed him or hugged him. And that was her behavior when things were good between them!
So yeah, by the time he had been 14 he had known that his parents didn’t have a happy marriage, even though they tried their best to pretend that they did. He remembered how sad he had been the first time his dad had to move out of the house, he had been so confused and he had just wanted things to get back to normal. He had asked his dad what he had happened, and his father had only said that he had done something bad, but he had promised Kenny that he would fix his mistake. And he did, just after Kenny’s birthday party he had moved back in the house. And they had shared the same room, which had been so cool. He hadn’t realized at that time the fact that it was a bad sign that his parents didn’t share a bedroom anymore.
And Kenny had done a lot of shitty things back then, he wasn’t proud of that, but he had just felt completely powerless and that’s why he had acted out. And after he ate that retirement cake ( one of the best cakes he ever ate, though) instead of yelling at him or saying that he was grounded his mom had just cuddled him and told him that it wasn’t his fault. That had meant the world to him, he knew how much she loved him. And that’s why he didn’t care that she cheated on his dad.
He had assumed that his mom would eventually start dating someone, after all his dad had started dating soon after the divorce, though it seemed like he could never keep a girlfriend for more than a few months. But she insisted that she had Kenny and his siblings and that was enough for her, she didn’t need anyone else.
He had thought it was a bit weird, but he hadn’t thought much about it until he was talking to his best friend, Hayden. The two of them had met soon after Kenny had moved back to Michigan, and the first thing they realized they had in common was that they both had divorced parents. And it had been so helpful to be able to talk to someone who could perfectly understand how he was feeling, and soon after they started seeing each other almost every day.
And yeah, he might have romantic feelings for Hayden, but it wasn’t something that he wanted to tell anyone, at least not yet. It wasn’t like he was afraid that his parents would be upset, far from it. His mom would probably insist that she should come with him to every pride parade, and he was pretty sure that his dad won’t really mind. After all, his best friend was a gay man.
And he knew that the rest of the family would react well, they were all very supportive of his cousin, Ben, when he came out. But man, he knew that things would be different after he would admit how he felt about his best friend, and how could he even tell if what he felt was real? He knew he liked girls, always have, but now he might be into guys as well?? And he doesn’t even know if Hayden feels the same, he couldn’t risk losing his best friend.
One day they were just talking in his bedroom ( and he was trying not to think about kissing him) when Hayden suddenly asked him if he would ever want to get a tattoo. Kenny said yes, even though he knew that his father would be so upset. He still remembered how furious his dad had been the first time Kenny had asked for a tattoo, he had started yelling at him and kept asking if Kenny wanted to look like a “ dirty big thug”. It had been scary, his dad rarely yelled at him, and he really hadn’t expected that kind of reaction. His mom would have freaked out, he knew that so that’s why he hadn’t asked her about it, but his dad? He always was such a cool person, they could have so much fun together, but now it was like he was a complete different person. And maybe it had been obvious that Kenny was getting scared, because his father had stopped ranting and just said that he wanted what was best for him. And that tattoos won’t make him look cool, girls would start avoiding him, and he didn’t want that to happen, right?
Kenny and Hayden talked about which tattoos they would love to get, when Kenny remembered the guy with the awesome neck tattoo. And shit, he hadn’t thought about that guy in years, and yeah...he would never be brave enough to get a tattoo on his neck ( who would kill him faster? His mom or his dad?) but he just had to tell Hayden how he met that cool guy. The last thing he had expected was for Hayden to start asking questions about his mom, after he had mentioned that the guy had been a friend of hers.
“ Dude, I think you met your mom’s lover!”
Okay, his first reaction reaction had been to laugh at Hayden’s joke ( ha ha, very funny!), but then he noticed that his best friend was actually being serious. And come to think of it, it made so much sense!
He remembered how insistent his mom had been that he should leave his homework and start watching TV ( back then he had hoped that this would happen more often, but it never happened again) and now he thought that she had sounded scared, like she was afraid that he would see something that he wasn’t supposed to. And he had seen that guy talking to his mom in the park a few times and one time when he had been swimming.
And his dad must have known about the affair, and that’s why he had been so furious when Kenny had told him that he wanted to get a tattoo. And he made her chose between her kids and that guy, and it was obvious that she had chosen her kids.
That would explain why she had been so miserable for two months back when Kenny had been 13. She had tried to put on a fake smile and pretend that she was okay, but he had been able to tell that she was suffering. She must have really loved that guy, and Kenny kinda hated his dad for hurting her like that. His mom deserved to be happy, and he hoped that she would start seeing that guy again. After all she had been divorced for two years now, nobody would force her to choose between that guy and her kids.
And maybe it was all just a big misunderstanding, but a few days later he came home earlier than usual and he saw his mom talking to that guy on the outdoor bench, and the way she was looking at that guy?? She had never looked at his dad like that, she reminded Kenny of the way Aunt Ruby would look at Stan.
They were holding hands and she must have said something funny because that guy had started laughing, but then he had noticed Kenny and he had stopped.
His mom had noticed that something was wrong and she looked so embarrassed when she saw Kenny, but she didn’t stop holding her lover’s hand.
“ Hey, sweetie, I wasn’t expecting you home so soon. How was school?”
He almost laughed, it was so typical of his mom to pretend that nothing unusual was going on. He didn’t say anything, just waited for her to explain who that guy was.
“ This is Christopher, he’s my...boyfriend. Please don’t tell your siblings about it, we want to take things slow” she smiled sheepishly, and that guy seemed so happy to be referred as her boyfriend. Adults would act sometimes like they were teenagers, it was quite fun to witness that.
“ I remember you!” Kenny had said, pointing at Christopher. “ You helped me with my math homework”
“ Didn’t think you’d remember that” the older guy had replied casually.
“ So how long had this been going on? If you don’t tell me I would just ask dad, I’m sure he has plenty to say” maybe it wasn’t nice of him to say that, but he needed answers.
His mom and Christopher just stared at each other for a long time, and then she finally replied. “ Two years, after your father and I got divorced”
He had every reason to be skeptical of that, though it made sense now why his dad had just said “ you’ll see soon enough” when Kenny had asked him why he had wanted to divorce his wife. He must have expected her to introduce her boyfriend right after they signed the papers.
“ I’m not an idiot, mom, I can tell that you are lying to me. He was at our house when I was 10 and you told me to go inside and watch TV. I doubt that you two were discussing math problems”
He had expected his mom to look embarrassed, but it seemed like he had been mistaken, because she promised him that there was nothing between them at that time. He believed her, she had no reason to lie about it.
“ But you are right, I was still married to your father when I started seeing Christopher. And that’s not something I am proud of, and you should never do something like that” she had continued.
“ I know about dad’s affairs, I’m not blaming you for what you did. You deserve to be happy, mom!” he could imagine that this was difficult for her, she must have been so scared that he and his siblings would hate Christopher.
“ Thank you, he makes me really happy” she admitted and smiled softly at her boyfriend. He guessed from now on he would know exactly how Sara and Harry felt every time their parents look at each other like they were soulmates. He hoped he won't come to regret this...