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“I’m sorry.”
Before he could even reach out his hand to wipe away the stray tear that had escaped her eye, to tell her it’s okay, to please stay , that they would get through it together, she had already closed the door to their apartment behind her, the echoes of her footsteps slowly fading away.
Jack raised a brow as a snowflake fell onto his nose. It was a little early in the year for snow. He let out a long sigh, his breath misting in front of his face. The first snowfall of the year no longer brought him the same joy, not without her laughter in his ears. 3 years. It had been 3 years since she had left, leaving him with nothing more than a broken heart. Pulling his coat tighter around his body, Jack quickened his pace, not having expected the snow to come for another 2 weeks.
As he passed by Tomes and Pages , Jack smiled bitterly to himself. It was in this very bookstore, on the first snowfall all those years ago, where they had first met.
Jack ran a hand through his dyed, snowy white hair, letting out a small sigh as he combed through the shelves for his university textbooks. Why were there so many textbooks? And why were they so hard to find anyway? His patience, which was not very large to begin with unless he was with children, was starting to wear thin. He would really much rather be in the storybook section, browsing through books to read to his kid sister (who, as much as Jack hated to admit it, was growing up far too fast for his liking).
Just as he was about to give up and resort to sharing the book with whichever poor soul would sit beside him in the lecture hall, a head of platinum blond slammed right into him, throwing both of them off balance and scattering several books across the ground. Jack growled, his already diminishing patience running dry. However, when he looked up to give this careless idiot a piece of his mind, the words died in his throat as he stared into the most beautiful pair of blue eyes he had ever seen.
“I’m so sorry. I wasn’t looking at where I was going.”
The women, having already recovered, shot him an apologetic smile, which nearly had Jack swooning had his butt not already been planted on the ground. It took him a while, but he managed to mutter out an “it’s okay” as they picked up their respective books and stood up. She gave him another shy smile and walked past him to the cashier, leaving Jack dumbfounded and wondering if he would ever meet her again.
They ended up sitting next to each other in the same lecture hall a week later, sharing that textbook Jack didn’t buy.
Jack shook his head, bringing himself out of reverie. It had been years, nearly a decade. Back when he thought that they would always be together, facing whatever the world threw at them with their hands tightly intertwined. He let out a snort. How naive he had been then. She had left, and he had no idea when, or if, she was ever coming back.
The snow was getting heavier. What was up with today's weather? Turning the corner, he ducked into the closest cafe. It wasn’t until he looked up that he realised it was their cafe.
Her laughter was like music to his ears, music that he would gladly listen on replay for the rest of his life. After nearly six months of throwing each other flirty glances and supposedly accidental brushing their hands, Jack had finally grown some balls and asked her out for coffee. (Actually, it was because they had to work on a project and had to find time out of class, but that was irrelevant.) They had slowly grown comfortable enough around each other that she stopped laughing behind her hand, but somehow still never losing that almost regal air around her. He learnt that she had a younger sister that she loved as much as he loved his own, and that she had grown up in Norway but had come to the United States a few years ago to pursue her university education. He had told her about his own sister, and about the various pranks he had pulled as a high schooler, loving how it drew out her melodic laughter each time. He found out that they both had a shared love for winter. Jack wondered if he would ever be good enough for her to consider dating him.
Another six months and many cups of coffee later, on the first snowfall of that year, to both their surprise, it was her that had asked if he was interested in a relationship. Of course he had said yes, leaning over the table to give her a sweet kiss. She had tasted of chocolate and peppermint.
Blinking, Jack let out another sigh, nursing his cup of hot mocha. Over his time with her, he had slowly grown fond of the chocolaty, caffeinated drink. Her favourite. He took another sip. It had been 3 years since he last stepped into this cafe, but it still made the best mocha he had ever tasted. Jack briefly wondered why he was suddenly having all these memories. Maybe it was the snowfall. It had to be the snowfall. Definitely not the tingly feeling in his chest, like something was about to happen. Noticing that the snow was no longer as heavy, he downed the remaining mocha and stepped out.
Having no particular destination in mind, and not really wanting to return to his lonely apartment, Jack let his feet carry him wherever, not paying much attention to his surroundings and generally just zoning out. It was a blessing that he had not walked straight into a lamp post, or run over by a car yet. It wasn’t much later that he realised exactly where he had been walking towards. The lake had frozen over and snow was gradually piling up around it. The scene sent him down another trip down memory lane.
Jack sputtered as a snowball hit him square in the face. For someone with such a petite frame, her snowballs sure did carry a lot of strength. Smirking, he wiped the snow from his face. Strong as she may be, no one beat the self-proclaimed King of Snowball Fights. Catching the mischievous smirk on his face, she let out a childlike squeal and ran away from him, dodging snowballs while trying to throw her own.
It could have been hours or mere minutes later (he could never really keep track of time when she was with him) when they both slumped back onto the snow, still soft from the first snowfall of that year. They were both panting heavily, the snowball fight having ended with a tie.
‘Looks like I found my queen,’ Jack thought to himself as he rolled to his side and propped himself up on one arm, wanting to have a better look at her as she let out soft giggles in between pants. He must have saved the world from a deadly force in his previous life for him to be blessed with such a beautiful girlfriend. Lacing his fingers through hers, he took a leap of faith.
“Say...it’s been some time since we got together. What do you think of getting a place together? Only if you want to! I mean, that is if you’re comfortable with living with someone like me. I’m not proposing by the way! Wait, it’s not that I don’t want to marry you! I really do, you have no idea how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you. It’s just...I’m going off tangent here. So... what do you say? You don’t have to answer me now, I understand if you want to take some time to think about it first.”
He finally looked up from his rambling, his heart sinking a little when he saw her mouth forming a perfect ‘o’, her eyes wide with shock. That was, until her face broke out in the largest grin and she threw herself at him, answering his question by pressing her lips against his. He smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close. The kiss broke off with a yelp when he felt some snow in his shirt and her pulling away slightly, her laughter once again filling his ears. He grinned. Looks like his playfulness had rubbed off on her, not that he was complaining. Especially not when she leaned in for another kiss.
Jack let out his nth sigh of the day. If the saying that sighing took a few years off your life each time was true, Jack didn’t want to think about how many years he had lost from just today alone. But seriously, what was with all the trips down memory lane today? It wasn’t as if the first snowfall of the last 3 years never brought back memories for him, just not this many. The tingling in his chest was also getting stronger.
‘Maybe she’s coming back.’
As soon as the thought entered his head, Jack scoffed. Sure, it wasn’t impossible, but with the way things had played out on that night 3 years ago, it was highly unlikely.
It was one of those rare nights where they had time to snuggle together on the couch, a sappy rom-com from Netflix playing on the television. Between him studying for his masters in child psychology, and her taking over the American branch of her parent’s company, they could hardly find time to simply relax in each other’s arms apart from when it was time for bed. Jack couldn’t help hoping their schedules would ease up soon. He had plans to ask for her hand in marriage, and if she wanted, which he was certain she did, to have children and grow a family. But until then, he would be content with having her in his arms and enjoying nights just like these.
At least that was his plan, until her phone rang, breaking the peaceful atmosphere. She grudgingly got up from his arms to reach for her phone on the coffee table. It wasn’t until the phone slipped from her hand and clattered noisily onto the ground that Jack realised something had gone horribly wrong. She had turned to him, tears threatening to fall from her eyes, her lips trembling with the words she couldn’t get out. Suddenly, the dam broke and she clutched his shirt as if it was life itself, sobbing into his chest. All he could do was hold her and rub his arm reassuringly down her back, having no clue as to what she could have heard over the phone.
The next morning, she had locked herself up in their room, refusing to come out. He had tried everything, from luring her with her favourite chocolates she saved only for special occasions, to simply begging her to talk to him. It wasn’t until hours later, when the sky was turning dark and his lips were starting to bleed from how hard he had been gnawing on them from worry, that she opened the door, her eyes red and puffy. She had sat him down at the kitchen table and explained everything. From how her parents had passed away from an accident at sea, to how she was set to take over the main company in Norway. He had reached out to put a reassuring hand on hers, when she pulled away. That was when Jack’s heart turned cold, a sense of dread filling his entire body.
He was proven right when she turned her head away from his, not wanting to show him the unshed tears in her eyes. She told him that between arranging her parent’s funeral, mourning, and dealing with the problems that would inevitably come with a young lady taking over the main branch of such a big company, it was likely that she would not have the time or heart for a relationship. She had spent the time in the room thinking about alternatives, about rejecting the position and leaving it to her younger sister, but she couldn’t bring herself to shift such immense pressure onto such a carefree and bright girl. She was to leave for Norway immediately, with no certainty of when or if she would return. With all things considered, she had come to the conclusion that it would be best for the both of them if they broke up.
Jack, of course, had refused. He had begged her to rethink her decisions, that they would find a solution where she could take over the company without breaking up. To work something out together . But she had simply shook her head sadly, her mind made up.
She had returned a few months later after the funeral, but only to collect her things. Naturally, Jack tried again to convince her to rethink their break up. But she left him with only two words.
“I’m sorry.”
A stray tear had escaped from her eyes, but Jack couldn’t even reach out to wipe it away before she had closed the door behind her. That was the last he saw of her for 3 years.
It had been on the first snowfall of that year.
Jack stared forlornly at the shiny surface of the lake, having sat down on the snow and leaning against a thick tree trunk. The tingling in his chest had only gotten stronger, and for the life of him, he couldn’t figure out why. Seeing that the sky was darkening, he let out yet another sigh, before standing up and dusting the snow off his clothes. He had turned around to head home when his breath hitched.
There, several feet away, stood the reason why his chest had been tingling the whole day and he had been having all these memories.
“Elsa.”
She was as beautiful as he remembered. Her eyes, while no longer bright with youthful innocence, were still as blue as ever. Her platinum blond hair was no longer in it’s signature braid, but instead falling all over her shoulders and framing her face gently. She looked ethereal. She looked free.
It could have been seconds, minutes, or even hours, but when the shock of seeing him too finally wore off, she gave him the same apologetic, shy smile that had him falling for her all those years ago.
“Jack.”
With one word, he had fallen in love with her all over again. No, scratch that. He had never stopped loving her.
Jack crossed the distance between them in a heartbeat, Elsa meeting him halfway. He trapped her in a bone crushing hug, her own arms bringing him as close as they possibly could. He could feel her tears soaking his shirt, small droplets of salty liquid running down his own face.
They would figure out the details later. But for now, all that mattered now was that she had come back. Back to him.
On the first snowfall all those years ago, they had met in a bookstore. On the first snowfall a year later, she had asked him out. On the first snowfall several years after, they had moved in together.
On the first snowfall 3 years ago, she had left him.
And on the first snowfall 3 years later, she was back in his arms.