Archive of Our Own

As the story goes, people grow. 

They branch out according to their strengths, like a tree. Not that Jay knew that out of every metaphor in existence, Jay is a tree, but he’s at least aware of the sentiment. He’s grown strong and has gotten smarter as a boxer but most of all, he’s a better version of himself.

That’s what he hopes to believe. 

Jay knows for sure that he’s out of the shadow of Ryu, has been for a long time actually. He has no clue where that old bully is but so far Jay hasn’t seen hide nor white spikey hair of the genius anywhere in the pro boxing world. (Sidenote, holy shit, Jay is officially in the pro boxing world!)

The only genius that Jay is personally invested in is Yu.

Yu, now that’s someone he fears at shadowboxing.

Jay’s knees lock up at his own imagination of boxing Yu.

Something tells him that Yu has been growing since high school. That’s evident since Yu defeated Jean Pierre Manuel and likely on his way to challenge Yuto Takeda. But that’s Yu’s story.

Jay’s story has its own momentum after defeating Rock Kang. Coach Typhoon Kim has up his training regiment and scheduling for the next matchups. So everything has been more or less the same as before his debut match, well except for this massive excitement and thrill and sense of achievement that came from winning his first ever official match.

It just made Jay want to train more, put more effort and above all, not rely on luck. 

A small part of himself still chalks up his fight with the Rock to luck. Yet Jay won’t discount his own hard earned success. Yu is at the height of his career, Jay’s career is only beginning. He still needs some more time and training, but he’s getting there.

So um right now though, Jay is really confused as to why he’s in America. 

“It’s the boring part of the boxing world,” Steel explains again when exiting the airport. “Don’t get too excited.”

“Conferences and meetings are necessary,” Coach Kim scolds the other man. He’s been repeating that to himself ever since they boarded the plane, as if forcing himself to come to terms with the not exciting parts of his job. 

“You’re only saying that because you’re a manager now.”

Coach rubs his forehead, either out of annoyance or checking if his hairline is receding more. Jay doesn’t have the courage to tell him that it is. 

What Jay does say aloud is, “So this is all business then? No training?”

“No I’m going to all these boring but important meetings while Steel is out hanging with his old buddies,” Coach laments. “And also no, we have guest access for the Lions gym. That is if Steel and his friends show up.” 

Steel huffs, “You make it sound like I’m slacking.” He pats Jay’s shoulder, “Sometimes the real talks happen outside of the board rooms, kid. It’s us in the ring, not some promoter or sponsor.”

“Oh so I’m tagging along with you?” Jay nearly bounces in his step but Steel’s hand is still on his shoulder, suppressing him from being a ball of energy. 

“Hell no, my pals and I are bar hopping.”

Coach glares at Steel, mostly with envy, as they’re headed out to a taxi. 

Jay’s mulls over everything said. He knows the business side of boxing is not his strong suit, thank god that Coach Kim is handling all that. Yet still he asks like the little kid he is compared to them, “Um, what am I doing on this trip then?”

“While I still think it’s not the best idea,” Coach sighs, “Jay, you’ve done a great job after your first match. Keep that momentum up no matter who you meet.”

At the genuine praise, Jay chirps, “Thanks Coach!”

“So Jay, well, you know him better, hell, I bet you probably know him the most out of anyone in the world.”

“Huh?”

Their taxi arrives in front of a grand white training center with the words LIONS BOXING CLUB in front. 

Coach keeps talking but Jay’s not listening. 

“What I’m trying to say is that he’s a strong fighter first and foremost, don’t let that diminish your own self worth and-”

“Kim, he’s out of the car,” Steel drones. 

“What?”

Jay’s already nearly crashing into the glass doors, blissfully he doesn’t actually break anything, and darts right though the doors. 

“...you better keep being a tree, Jay.”

“Stop right there.”

Jay’s not out of breath from the sprint from the taxi to the gym’s lobby but his heart thumps fast at the chilling, no nonsense gaze of this blonde woman. 

She’s standing perfectly still compared to how Jay’s shoes squeak from halting his impromptu dash. 

“Hi, I’m Jay,” he introduces for a lack of better words. He hopes his smile isn’t too nervous, Jay’s just not the most comfortable in front of business people.

This lady appears to be the epitome of business and competency. 

“Yes, you’re one of the arriving guests for the conference this week. I’m Carmen, manager of the gym,” she glances at her clipboard and Jay has a weird feeling that he’s just a statistical number to her. She glances back up and smiles politely, “Rookies usually don’t join their coaches for these things. Let me guess, you’re here for the gym access.”

It’s a reasonable guess on her part, the knowing glint in her eyes makes it look like she knows from experience. 

“Actually, well yes that’ll be great,” Jay clears his throat with a cough, rambling won’t do him good here, especially with his eagerness. “But I’m here to see Yu.”

All the polite and friendly attitude disappears from the woman completely even though she still has that pristine smile. For a second Jay fears for his life. Carmen adjusts her glasses in a fashion that outright feels like judgement. 

“I’m afraid your goal is not original.” 

She walks off, it took Jay a second to realize he’s meant to follow, to the doors leading to the gym’s main attraction. She points through the glass at one ring that’s drawn a huge crowd. 

There’s a difference from watching a fight from a tv screen compared to merely a short distance away. Jay can physically feel the tension and thrill from the gym but the audience isn’t the typical crowd. 

Professions and other confident boxers are keenly watching how Yu flawlessly dodges and weaves around the punches of his latest opponent. It’s a silent awe that is both impressed and horrified in the best way possible. 

And Jay eludes that rookie aura of giddiness that is coming off more as starstruck than seriousness. 

Carmen puts a damper on Jay’s growing excitement at the sight of the upstar boxer with a warning. “K’s taking this opportunity to, in his words, get the small fry a taste of something they will never achieve. He’s only picking out a handful that meets his standards, like the former gold medalists and such.” 

Unspokenly, not rookies. 

Jay’s not entirely sure how to respond to that. According to Coach Kim, the esteemed champion trainer K works with extremes that apply to his own intensity. In other words, Jay believes that man will either land a serious blow on his confidence as a boxer or not tolerate him at all. 

But that shouldn’t matter right now, right?

After all, Jay’s not here for some master trainer or boxer.

So Jay repeats with clarity, “Well I’m here to talk to Yu, catch up really. We haven’t seen each other since school.”

Carmen stares at him, stunned for a moment and Jay barely catches her humming thoughtfully. 

“Never heard that one before,” she muttered under her breath.

“Huh?”

“Nothing,” Carmen concludes as she looks between the blond rookie and the uprising boxer. “Looks like the match is winding down, let’s go.”

Sure enough, the boxer against Yu is losing steam and panting in frustrated exhaustion. A few other people in the gym share that sentiment. Their frowns and annoyance at Yu’s nonchalant attitude suppresses Jay’s initial eagerness to shout out a greeting. 

None appear as bullish as Ryu but Jay still tries not to paint a target on his back. Instead Jay goes over to Yu’s corner of the ring and waves at him. 

Honestly Yu looks nearly completely different as far as Jay can tell. The first time he saw Yu on tv, Jay had whiplash. Gelled spiky hair and well defined muscles is a drastic transformation compared to flat, barely brushed hair that’s always covering his eyes. 

As for himself, well, Yu stares at Jay for a solid three seconds before uttering, “You’re not wearing glasses.”

With the sparring match over, most of the other athletes have wandered away as Yu stepped out of the ring. For some reason a few stayed nearby to subtly eavesdropped. Well one dude was not subtle, a ginger haired guy mouthed what the hell to Carmen, still at Jay’s side. She didn’t pay that any attention, too busy darting her eyes between Jay and the approaching Yu. Her shock implies she didn’t actually believe he was old friends with Yu. 

“Ha, yeah, my coach said to stop wearing them when training. I got contacts though. They’re kind of weird to put on when I first got them.” Jay rambled, blinking to make an emphasis. The vision in his left eye was still bad, what with the cornea torn from way back when. 

Yu also blinked right back at him, as if processing everything. “You’re a boxer.”

If he said that to anyone else, they would’ve thought Yu’s being condescending with his flat voice. But this is Jay and even though it’s been a few years, he remembers how Yu’s the type of talker that means so much in a few words. 

Jay grins blindingly, recalling the day he shouted at Ryu. “I did say I was gonna be one, right?”

There’s a pause in Yu’s entire being. Without bangs to cover his eyes, Jay can clearly see something sharpening in them. 

“You did,” Yu said, a certain stiffness still affecting him, “and you are.”

“Hey, it’s not that much of a surprise,” Jay half joked, half awkward at Yu’s reaction or lack thereof. Come to think of it, Jay never really had an expectation of receiving any sort of praise or insult from Yu.

He always knew he wanted to reunite with Yu some day, a farfetched dream of it being on the ring, but now that he’s actually here in front of him…

Jay can’t help but laugh cheerfully, no doubt a complete contrast to Yu’s neutral face. The few people around are giving them odd looks but that is never new. 

“Yu, I’m really happy to see you.”

His genuineness gets a fraction of a head tilt from Yu but in the end the boxer replies, “It’s nice to see you too, Jay.”

There’s a weird choked, coughing noise suddenly. The ginger guy from before is struggling to stand up straight, clutching his sides in shock as he attempts to regain his breath. Carmen sternly glares at him and the guy gulps and hastily walks away, his coughing decreasing. 

“Um, what?”

Yu shrugs.

“Josh is just,” Carmen mulls over an assurance while regaining her composure, “surprised that Yu spoken something with an opinion.”

Jay raises a brow at that.

Yu shrugs. 

“So,” Jay carried on, still feeling awkwardness cling to the air like sweat. “Are you still training for the day or do you want to hang out?” 

Yu did a slow turn to stare at someone. Jay follows his line of sight and low and behold, Jay tenses up at the intense judging glare of the infamous K. It’s different yet oh so similar to when Ryu caught on to Jay getting a glimpse of happiness by trying to befriend Yu. Of course it might not be accurate for Jay to compare the two situations but Ryu’s bullying is the only reference he can personally correlate it too.

There’s just something angry and possessive in those old eyes. Where Ryu pursuit appeared more as a pride thing, K has something entirely different, something starving. 

He’s pulled out of that cold fear when Yu side steps, taking up Jay’s vision. Or perhaps blocking Jay from K’s view. 

“Coach said to spar anyone until there’s no one else today.” Yu asks him, “Did you want to too?”

Jay briefly recalled his shadow boxing idea and as uncowardly as possible declined, “No, not today really. I just want to hang out with you.” 

To everyone else in the gym, Jay is currently out of place since he just left the airport wearing regular jeans and a hoodie. Unpreparedness is a perfect excuse to get out of a fight with a genius boxer. Yet boxing is not his priority right now. 

Jay scratched the back of his neck, a little unsure, “I just thought, well, there’s no Ryu to scare me away from you. I kind of want to make things up to you.”

Yu blinked at him and softly said, as if not understanding, “You don’t have too.”

“But I want to,” he insisted with a smile. 

Again Yu is staring at him like he’s a big confusing surprise. Jay’s pretty sure this was the same reaction when they were on the benches during PE. Jay really believed that he could have one normal day free from bullies and worries with Yu. 

That was in high school, that was back when Jay’s spine was used as a chair and Yu was labeled as the creepy quiet kid. Now they’re both boxers. (Yet the glare from K is popping into Jay’s head, something stronger than a bully like Ryu.)

“...Do you want to see my cat?”

“Oh!” Jay mentally backflipped at the sudden shift in topics and recalled, “Oh yeah, you still have one?”

Yu nodded but furrowed his eyebrows, “You knew about her.”

“Your uniform always had cat fur.”

“Huh.”

A small laugh gets their attention and the guys turn and see Carmen covering her mouth with her clipboard. As if not caught at investing in their conversation, Carmen says, “Your schedule is light for the week, what with K required with attending the conferences. You should have plenty of free time to do whatever you like.”

She glanced over to Jay as if to make a point before walking off, finally leaving them. Also if Jay’s contact prescription is correct, he spots a tiny smile on Carmen. 

“She’s less intimidating than I thought,” Jay admitted. 

Yu has a clueless expression at that but shrugs it off.

“So you’re really his friend?”

Yu had gone to the locker room to shower and get his stuff. That left Jay alone in the lobby until this redhead guy walked up to him. 

“Um yes,” Jay tilts his head, recalling, “Carmen said you’re Josh right?”

“Yeah,” Josh winced at his earlier coughing mess, “I was just seriously caught off guard.”

“...Because Yu has a friend?”

Again Josh took physical damage to his own blunderings. “Okay, yes I sound awful out of context, but Yu hasn’t really been…” He looked away with a frown.

A part of Jay wants to defend Yu on his behalf but Jay understands the feeling. Yu always gave off the presence that he never wants social interaction but there’s something else too. Jay remembers the last time he saw Ryu, both of them in hospital gowns and how the defeated bully did not want to make any eye contact. 

Jay crossed his arms, “You fought Yu, didn’t you.”

Sighing, Josh meets his gaze with tormented humor, “Didn’t even graze him. It was his first day too, back when he had no abs.”

That makes Jay gulp down a sudden wad of nervousness. “That must have been devastating.” 

“Yeah I even stopped...” Josh’s chin tucked to his neck, a magnitude of shame bearing down, “I only came back here to see some of the other visitors. I didn’t want to see Yu win again.” 

Jay presses his lips in a thin line, “Harsh.” 

It’s like what the coach told him, Jay is probably the only one in the world who knows Yu the most. That’s saying something since it’s been literally years since they last saw each other. Geniuses either attract or ward off people, these are the only extremes. Not like that is going to stop Jay though. 

“I don’t mean it in a cruel way,” Josh tried to defend, looking more miserable each second. 

“But you’re letting someone else rule over your own will,” Jay stated. “Whether it is intentional or not.” 

Jay always knew that while Yu is a genius like Ryu, Yu has never eluded any malicious, power hungry nature. Sure he was brutal to the point of sending Ryu to the ER but Jay later learned from the staff that Yu had paid off both boys’ hospitable bills. 

He hopes his weighty gaze doesn’t come off as judgement to Josh, he just wants the guy to back off from Yu on this matter. 

Josh bit his lower lip in confliction, maybe even taking responsibility on his own failings rather than dwelling on the despair associated with Yu. While Jay is one of few people that witnessed Yu’s prowellness and became more determined as a boxer, giving up appears as a more realistic goal as evident in Josh’s words and how he regards Yu.

It’s probably not Jay’s place to add insult to injury about this guy giving up boxing. Jay just met him today after all. At the same time, Jay knows how it feels to get knocked down by a genius. 

He got back up.  Josh didn’t. 

As Coach Kim would put it, Jay is a tree. Sometimes that metaphor doesn’t apply to others. 

“I asked Yu about another genius. How this guy was also stronger than me,” Josh brings up suddenly. It sounds like both an excuse and an accusation. 

“Yeah, Ryu, he also stopped boxing,” Jay tells. Josh’s shock was the same face Jay made when he heard, except there’s some fear added in. “I don’t know what you want me to say Josh. I got beaten up by Ryu and you got defeated by Yu.” Jay remembers each punch Ryu threw at him and how he still stood up for himself. Smiling proudly, Jay declares, “I’m still boxing.”

Josh has wide eyes, both surprised and awed. Then he smiles back, “You must be strong Jay.”

“Yeah,” Jay says softly, flattered and touched by the earnest look in Josh, “I am.”

“He is.”

“Ah!”

Both guys jump at the sudden presence of Yu, now changed into track pants and a black shirt. Adding on to the surprises, Yu’s hair is damp and flat, exactly the same hairstyle from their youth. 

“Josh.”

“Um, yeah Yu?”

“This is Jay,” Yu introduces with a wave. “The one I mentioned before.”

“Huh?” Both Jay and Josh questioned.

His dark eyes flickered to Jay, “He’s really stronger than you.”

Jay darted his head between looking at either Yu or Josh, not catching onto whatever revelation the redhead is having while Yu is neutral as usual.

“Oh,” Josh finally concludes on. 

This time, he stares at Jay with admiration, something Jay is only used to receiving from his dad, Coach Kim, and rarely Steel. 

Yu turns to Jay, “Wanna go now?”

“Um, sure,” Jay throws a questioning glance at Josh before waving off, “Bye Josh, see you later?”

It shook Josh out of whatever daze he was in, “Yeah.” There’s a new strength in his posture as he promises, “You will.”

As they’re walking out the building, Jay catches Yu looking over his shoulder, watching Josh head back into the boxing gym. 

“Nice house you got.”

“...I guess it is,” Yu responds dully as he unlocks the door.

In a sad way, the house’s decorations tell a lot about Yu. Nothing intimate or personal. Jay remembers the way Carmen hesitated to describe how Yu is not known for opinions or expressions. House models have more personality than Yu’s simple décor. 

There’s no picture frames that hold faces or achievements or anything of his interests. Instead the only thing that represents all of Yu is a tiny black cat meowing at them. 

The cat pads forwards to rub against Yu’s leg before curiously beaming little eyes up at Jay. 

“Awe,” Jay coos and kneels down, extending a hand. “She’s so cute. What’s her name?”

It’s completely silent for the next few seconds, not that Jay would realize it as all of his focus is on this cat slowly nearing his open hand. He even held his breath when the little animal sniffed his hand and butted her head against it. 

With a big wide open smile, Jay gasped and gently scratched the cat under the chin. 

Her purring filled up the silence and that’s when Jay tried to remember if Yu answered him or not. 

Yeah, he did not. 

Jay glanced up to Yu and low and behold, there was a strange confused and dumbfounded expression on his usual blank face. 

“It’s okay if she doesn’t have a name,” Jay assured, even though he found this all a little odd. Then again Jay once named a pet fish Fred. Sometimes no name is better than any. 

“Does she have any toys?”

If Jay had the powers to read minds, it would be clear as day that there are ellipses floating above Yu’s head. 

“Um… no.”

“We could go buy her some?”

Yu had a far off look in his eyes, “Huh.”

So one google map search and a twenty minute walk later, Jay, Yu, and the cat arrive at the local pet shop. 

Even without saying it, the two boys didn’t have much experience of hanging out with other people. Jay’s been training from sunrise to sundown for his debut fight and while he did get familiar with the other regulars at Coach Kim’s gym, he wasn’t extremely close to any of them. 

Or at least not close in the way that Jay feels about Yu. 

Yu wasn’t just a fellow classmate with the same bully. Yu took the hit for Jay to get the bullies to leave him alone, the very day Jay wanted to stand up for himself. If it was just one day earlier, Yu wouldn’t have been pummeled in the school’s storage room. 

But that wasn’t the biggest ‘what if’ in Jay’s life. Ever since Yu left South Korea, Jay wondered if he could be the friend that Yu deserves. Jay always had the dream of becoming a boxer and he’s trained tooth and nail for it. Right now though, he’s determined to be Yu’s friend.

It’s something they both missed out on in their school days. 

Going to a pet store is not what Jay imagined for his first day in America, nor with Yu either but here they are. 

What ensues, for all intents and purposes, is a shopping montage. 

Out of the two of them, only the cat knew what to do. So even though she was in Yu’s arms, the cat took the lead. They mostly just placed the cat in front of the toys and let her choose which toy is worth her attention. 

“I don’t have much experience with cats,” Jay admitted. He waved a stick with a feather at the pet. She used both hands to haplessly snatch the toy. “But this is fun.”

Yu nodded. His keen attention is all drawn onto his cat. It’s the most sharp Jay has seen Yu’s eyes. Sure there was always this certain awareness captured when he’s boxing but with his cat, Yu seems marveled. It’s really sweet. 

“She’s happy,” Yu said gently. 

It continues on like this, a little awkward but still maintaining this certain peace between them. Jay has a shopping basket that’s slowly getting filled with cat toys. At first he’s a little worried that this would be too costly but Yu doesn’t seem too concerned. Or the very least, Yu wants to spoil his cat.

The little fellow would just meow at a cotton stuffed mouse and the next second later, it’s tossed into the basket. 

Jay accidentally let out a stifled laugh. 

“Did you just laugh?” 

Guilty, Jay nervously grinned under the blank gaze of Yu. “Sorry, it’s just this is so domestic and cute of you.” 

Yu raised an eyebrow, “Cute.”

“Uh,” Jay trailed off, both unsure and embarrassed as his words. “I mean um-”

“It’s fine.” Yu turned his focus back to the cat, petting her head. 

They made the dumb decision to wander down the pet bed aisle because immediately, the cat jumped out of Yu’s arms and climbed up the highest cat bed tree of the whole store. 

“Hey Yu?”

“Yes Jay?”

“Are we going to carry this to your house?”

“...I don’t have a car so probably.”

It didn’t occur to them to even try to convince the cat to pick a different, smaller, cat tree. It would be a losing match. They managed to place the cat tree on a dolly and rolled it to the cash register. The cat was still perched on top so they were extra careful. 

“Yu, just making sure but, you can actually pay for all of this right?” Jay checked because he only exchanged some bills at the airport’s currency exchange. 

He’s not eager to spend it all in one day but if Yu needed help paying for a basket worth of cat toys Jay wouldn’t mind. As Jay looks up at the cat and those beady eyes, Jay knows that he too is weak and would spoil this cat too. 

“I can pay.” Yu answered as his purchases got scanned. 

Jay winced at the total price. “Alright if you’re sure. Huh what’s that?”

All of Jay’s financial concerns are not just assured but decimated when Yu pulls out his wallet. 

“Carmen gave me this.” Yu inserts a black credit card into the card reader. 

The cashier finishes bagging the toys and points at the cat tree, “Do two you need help loading this to your car?”

Again the boys stare at the cat tower and imagine walking with it for twenty or more minutes. 

“...I can carry this.”

“I know you can Yu but you definitely can’t with your cat on top.” The thin line that is Yu’s lips dips into an unconvinced frown. Jay went for the final blow. “If you can get your cat down, you can carry it. But if you can’t-”

A meow gets their attention. The cat stares down at them, challengingly.

“You can’t get her down.”

“I cannot.” Yu exhales with a sigh and pulls out his phone, “I’ll call Carmen.” 

“Hello again,” Carmen graced the cat with a grin and the pet jumped down into her arms.

Now that the cat left the tower, the guys loaded the cat tree into Carmen’s truck. Technically it's the gym’s truck since the logo is plastered on the side. 

Jay can’t believe how rich this gym is. From what Yu told him, Carmen handles Yu’s expenses that he uses sparingly. So this shopping trip is definitely out of Yu’s normal routine. 

“Thanks for picking us up,” Jay smiles gratefully, sliding into the backseat. 

“You’re welcome.” Carmen was at the wheel so she handed the cat to Yu once he settled in the front seat. 

Yu gave her a nod and a small, “Thanks.”

Being in the backseat, Jay had the perfect view of Carmen side glancing at Yu with a curious smile. He remembers how shocked she and Josh were about Yu showing any sort of personality. Either Yu is extremely unsociable or everyone around him didn’t give him a chance. It’s likely a little bit of both but maybe now they would extend a friendly hand to Yu.

“Oh yeah, Jay,” Carmen asks, “Do you need to be dropped off at your hotel now?”

“Um, I left some of my bags at Yu’s house.” Jay said. 

He packed only three bags as carry on for the airplane. Yu didn’t mind him leaving the bigger ones in the living room when they left for the pet store. 

Yu turned his head towards him, “If you want, you could stay with me.”

“Really?” Too giddy to even hesitate, Jay exclaims, “Yeah Yu, I’d love to!”

The cat meows loudly in response and Jay will believe that she approved too. Also if Jay had noticed, Carmen had a proud look on her. 

In no time they reached the house and Carmen bid them goodbye. This time both guys saw how she looked at them. Why she appeared proud, amused, and curious, neither of them can guess. Nor did they have the attention span because they needed to get the cat tree inside to stop the cat’s demanding meows. 

Once the cat was happily in her new tower, the guys wandered into the kitchen. Jay made the invasive choice of opening the fridge. Look he slept on plane ride and powering through jet lag to hang out with Yu. Only now did Jay acknowledge that finished snacking all his granola bars. This boxer is hungry.

So he swung the fridge door open and stared at an entire rack dedicated to water bottles, a bruised banana, and a half open tin of fancy cat food. 

Yu slowly closed the fridge and directed Jay’s hunger to an open cabinet. Instant noodle cups are a welcoming sight to their poor stomachs. 

“It’s kind of funny but I get it,” Jay muses as they wait for the kettle to boil water. “For my first win, Coach treated me, Dad, and Steal to a hot pot restaurant. Nothing extremely fancy but still classy.” Jay smoothed out the powder in its packet, playing with its gravity by flipping it upside down. “There’s just something about instant ramen that feels more normal.”

Yu humms noncommittally, “I’m used to this. I can’t imagine eating anything else.”

Jay tries to hide his frown behind his hand. Somehow he knew that money won’t make Yu happy. It’s not the fact that he doesn’t know what to do with it, it’s that there’s no initiative to want things. 

The day before they got beaten up by Ryu and the bullies, when Jay asked Yu if he wanted to play video games with him. Would Yu say yes?

The loud pitch of the kettle snaps Jay out of his thoughts. In a practiced motion, Yu had poured the hot water in their noodle cups. 

Jay wants to laugh at himself for doubting Yu. Just minutes ago the guy invited Jay to stay the night, exceeding the expectations of what those like Carmen, Josh, and even Coach Kim have on Yu. 

“Thanks,” Jay genuinely says when their dinner is ready. “Not just for this but for today as well.”

Yu stares at him again with that tormented confusion. “I should be thanking you.” He slurped up some noodles before gesturing to the cat tree. “She’s happy.”

“Ah, well, I’m sure she’s happy with you regardless of any new stuff.”

The silence is as warm as their food. Jay honestly liked the quiet presence of Yu, something that’s both comforting and at ease. 

Yu speaks up once his cup is empty. He admits, “I never really thought about buying her stuff until you suggested it.”

“You don’t have to listen to me.”

“But I want to. I like listening to you.” Yu stares at Jay with an intensity he doesn’t comprehend. “I always did.”

Jay pushed aside his finished cup and chopsticks. He didn’t expect something so deep, no less something that makes Jay feel emotional about. Yet at the same time, taking Yu’s words to face value, Jay needs to ask this question.

“Yu why did you become a boxer?”

“Because you wanted to be one.”

“What?”

“I heard you. I'm gonna be a boxer. ”

One might feel honored to inspire someone else’s career but instead Jay feels sad for Yu. 

Frowning, Jay said, “Yu, you shouldn’t have to follow me if you don’t want to.”

“That's just it.” Yu’s tone of voice hardened, his inflection shifting the neutrality that has molded his character. “You wanted something. I don’t know what it’s like to want something. Until…”

Jay swallowed down a nervous wad, unsure of where this is all leading to. “Until?”

“The Sun, he told me all the stars are shining for me.” He said it all so seriously that Jay did not wonder if this was a metaphor. “I didn’t understand why. I still don’t. Why would something so bright be alive for me?”

Yu turned his gaze out the window, remembering a galaxy worth of stars beyond the glass.

Then his voice got soft, a self realization on how one life is a mere speck in the universe. 

“This light… It’s so far away. I want to see it again and…” His focus returned to Jay, “I saw that light in you.” 

Out of words, Jay is breathless at witnessing the pure mix of emotions swirling madly in Yu’s eyes. Envy, despair, frustration, hope, all the pain and pressure Jay feels in a boxing match but here, it’s almost like art. 

“Jay,” Yu barely chokes it out, “what do you see in me?” 

He dips his head down, dark bangs coat over his eyes yet Jay sees hopeless flood out the rest of colors. Yu expects him to answer with descriptions of darkness, of a destined void for a devil. 

Jay had seen a glimpse of these eyes from years ago, back when he didn’t know or bother to understand Yu. 

It’s like Yu never aged. In some way, he perfectly resembles the same frail, sad kid on the first day of school. Back then, it was obvious to categorize people as strong and weak. Jay made the assumption to believe Yu was weak just like him. With that in his mind, Jay thought that maybe he had the chance to have a friend.

Jay answers Yu with the truth. 

“I see a boy who is in my life yet is so far away.” Yu lifts his chin up a tad, his hair still acting as a barrier between them but that doesn’t stop Jay. “Me being a boxer and seeing you again, those are two separate goals but I’m so lucky to have them on the same path.” 

Yu hasn’t moved at all in response. Jay can barely tell if he’s breathing. The sound of soft footsteps eases the mood as Yu’s cat jumps onto her human’s lap. In the short time Jay’s been with them, he always saw Yu automatically pet the cat. This time though, Yu is slow and hesitant to comb his fingers through the soft black fur. His hand trembles a little. 

“Do you really mean that?” Yu asks in a whisper. 

“Yes.” 

Yu doesn’t say anything else for the rest of the night but Jay doesn’t take it as any insult. There’s an awful lot of things for Yu to think about, as if he’s starting to understand why the stars shine. Or not, maybe he’s more confused than ever. Jay really hopes that Yu will one day sort this all out. 

In the end, Jay finds himself sleeping right besides Yu on the floor of Yu’s room. There’s a lot of subtext and implications revolving around Yu and Jay knows now if not the time to voice his curiosity. Whatever Yu needs, time, space, or a friend, Jay hopes that Yu will get it all. Jay hopes he can be the friend Yu deserves. 

The windows are partially drawn open for the stars to twinkle lightyears away just for them.