Work Text:
Patches was Not Happy.
Her Not Happpiness had started a few months ago when her Boy had gone out (which she didn’t like) and came back with the Sapnap.
He had been excited for the days leading up to the arrival of the Sapnap, and Patches had begun to get excited too. After all, what made her Boy happy made her happy. She hadn’t known what was coming. She’d thought that perhaps they would be getting some new furniture, or a really good Snack.
So she’d been completely dumbfounded when her Boy left the House, and came back a few hours later with a Stranger. She didn’t like Strangers usually, but she could get used to their scent, and find out who they were, and what they wanted. Then they wouldn’t be Strangers, and she could relax.
But things had been different with this Stranger. As soon as they got back and had put all the fabric boxes into the Empty Room, her Boy had swept Patches up and held her up to look at the Stranger. “Look, Patches!” He had exclaimed. “It’s Sapnap!” He seemed to expect her to recognise him, and while his voice seemed familiar, the rest of him was not. She didn’t know what a Sapnap was, but his face looked nice, and her Boy seemed happy to see him, so she merely flicked her ear in the way that meant “he can stay, for now”.
Her Boy knew what she meant, like always, and cuddled her closer to his chest, saying, “aw, don’t worry, she’ll warm up to you. She always gets a bit weird with new people.” She sneezed, because her Boy was right, she didn’t like new people. But he was so happy to see the Sapnap that she vowed she would try her hardest to like him too.
—
After a week, Patches was ready to take back her promise to try and like the Sapnap. He was horrible! He had one of the Light Boxes that her Boy liked to sit and shout at, and he sat and shouted at it a lot. Where her Boy used to come and cuddle with her when he wasn’t using the Light Box, now he went and sat with the Sapnap, lying on his bed or sitting at his feet. It made her spit with rage. Her Boy was definitely higher in the hierarchy than the Sapnap! He shouldn’t have to sit at his feet.
Sometimes she would go and stand by the doorway to the Sapnap’s room, watching him to make sure that he wasn’t just wandering around the House, doing as he pleased. He would eye her awkwardly, stopping whatever he was doing to kneel down where she was and “pspsps” at her. Patches knew he was trying to trick her. She only liked it when her Boy said “pspsps” to her. And his Mother. Usually when her Boy said “pspsps”, it meant she was going to get a Snack. Some chicken, perhaps, or a bit of bread.
The Sapnap never gave her Snacks. And whenever he called her over, he would try and pick her up with his rough hands. Patches didn’t like that. He grabbed her too tight, not at all like the gentle way her Boy cradled her.
“Dude,” the Sapnap had said once. “You literally hold her like a baby.”
Patches didn’t like babies. They were too loud, and pulled at her fur. But if this was how babies got treated, she thought, lying on her back in her Boy’s strong arms, then she supposed they were used to nice things.
“That’s ‘cause she’s my baby,” her Boy had replied. Patches had smugly mewed at the Sapnap. He wasn’t her Boy’s baby. She was. Take that, the Sapnap.
That night, however, after the Sapnap had been safely chased away to his Room for the Night, her Boy had held her up to his face with a frown on his face. “I wish you’d be nicer to Sapnap, baby,” he muttered. “He’s a nice guy, I promise. He just wants to cuddle you.” Patches felt a bit guilty. Clearly, her Boy liked having the Sapnap here. Perhaps, she could try a little harder. After all, she acquiesced, the Sapnap hadn’t actually done anything. He never shouted, except at the Light Box. He wasn’t rude, he didn’t tug her fur or poke at her.
Well, alright. For her Boy’s sake, she would try again.
—
In the morning, she had trotted out to the Kitchen, mewing for her Breakfast. Her Boy never failed to remember, but Patches couldn’t be sure that he wouldn’t forget if she wasn’t there to remind him. It was best to repeatedly smack her Bowl with her paw until he filled it with food. Just in case.
The Sapnap was already there, sitting on the Couch, with a bowl of Human Food in his hands. Hmm, would now be a good time to begin her new policy of being nice to the Sapnap? While he was eating? While his lap was full? Yes, absolutely.
Patches abandoned her dish, sauntering up to the Sapnap. Not bothering to wait for him to move the bowl, she leapt into his lap.
“Woah!” He shouted, diving for his Breakfast. He seemed to realise what had just happened, whispering loudly. “Oh my God! She’s sitting on my lap! Dream, she’s sitting on my lap!”
Her Boy had smiled widely, doing something with the Small Light Box he kept in his pocket. He made the strange, dry sound he makes when he finds something funny, loudly saying, “see? I told you she’d come around.”
—
For a few weeks, Patches had been mollified. The Sapnap was not a Stranger, and although he wasn’t part of the Family either, she didn’t mind sharing space with him. He never moved her from her napping spots, always choosing to sit somewhere else. If he woke up before her Boy, he would put her Food out for her, and he changed her Water whenever she asked. Guiltily, Patches recalled the fact that she had sometimes demanded that he change her Water even when it wasn’t necessary, just to stroke her ego by seeing him bend to her will. But the last time she did it, he had wryly muttered, “I think you’re just doing this to fuck with me,” and she was so spooked that the Sapnap had worked out what she was doing that she was too scared to do it again.
After she had become almost fully adjusted to having the Sapnap living in their House, he had disappeared again. Her Boy had dejectedly moped around for a few days, often going to the Room that used to be the Sapnap’s and sighing. Patches felt ashamed to admit that sometimes she also went to the Sapnap’s Room. Just to check that nothing was being messed with, of course.
Sometimes, her Boy would sit at the Light Box, and she would curl up in his Lap, like usual, except now she knew why the Sapnap’s voice had been familiar. When she heard it emanating from the Sound Tubes of the Light Box, she could have kicked herself. Of course, the Sapnap was one of her Boy’s Far Away Friends.
When he had first brought her Home, her Boy had rambled on for hours about his life. One of the first things he had told Patches about were his Far Away Friends, who lived, well, Far Away. She felt even worse about being rude to the Sapnap now. Who knew how long her Boy had been waiting to see him?
Patches swore to herself that if the Sapnap ever came back, she would be nicer than ever to him. A perfect hostess.
Feeling as if she might have been responsible for driving the Sapnap away, she did all she could to comfort her Boy. She would curl up on his Lap whenever he sat down, flipping over and squirming on her back in the way she knew he found adorable, showing off her fluffy tummy. When they went to bed, she would lie down, tucked up, on his chest to keep him company. During the day, she would follow him around the House, constantly chatting to him.
“Do you miss the Sapnap?”
(“Patches,” he sobbed into her fur. “I’m so fucked up. I miss him way more than I should.”)
“Are you lonely?”
(“I wish he was here, y’know?” he said to her conversationally as he buttered some bread for his lunch, occasionally dropping pieces of ham into her mouth. “I got so used to having him around, it’s weird being by myself again.”)
“Is it my fault he left?”
(“Do you think he’s having a better time with Karl?” he asked her, hands tightening anxiously around the hem of his shirt. “Do you think he’ll want to come back? Was I too clingy?”)
—
But when the Sapnap did return after a few weeks, her promise to be kind to him went out the window.
She had been napping in a nice sunny spot, and completely missed the Sapnap’s return. That’s why she was utterly gobsmacked when she padded into the living room, and saw the Sapnap sitting in her spot on her Boy’s lap. Her mood instantly soured. Yes, she had wanted to be nicer to the Sapnap, but that was before he stole her favourite cuddling spot.
Patches only became more enraged when she heard her Boy mutter, “Sapnap, baby, I missed you. So much.” No. That wasn’t right. He had said that she was his baby. Not the Sapnap. Never the Sapnap! She crept closer, and saw red when she realised her Boy had his lips pressed against the Sapnap’s and was making moaning noises.
The Sapnap was hurting her Boy! She saw red, and, claws unsheathed, Patches launched herself at the Sapnap. Her claws sank into the soft flesh of his back in the most satisfying way, and she let out a fierce hiss which hid her pleasure when he leapt up from her Boy’s lap, crying out in pain.
“Ow, fuck! What the hell?” He shouted, whipping around to stare at her. She stated back.
Her Boy stood up from the Couch, kneeling down to look at her. “Patches, what the fuck was that for?” He asked, face heavy with confusion.
She was equally confused. Did he not appreciate that she just saved him? She let out a confused meow, trying to explain to him that she had rescued him from the Sapnap. Her Boy crouched down further, scooping her up and holding her close to his chest. Ah, yes. This was much more like it. The kind of cuddle Patches deserved for seeing off a ferocious attacker like the Sapnap.
But her Boy held her up to his eyeline, staring at her. “Patches, you can’t just attack Sapnap. What did he ever to do you, huh?” Was he serious? What hadn’t he done to her?
“Uh. Maybe- nah, that’s stupid, forget it.” The Sapnap cut himself off, rubbing at the back of his neck.
“No, go on,” said her Boy, rubbing her behind her ear.
“Maybe she thought, like, I was hurting you, or something? I mean, I’m not trying to be rude, but she probably hasn’t seen you make out with someone before, right? So maybe she thought I was attacking you? Or something like that, I dunno.”
Her Boy elbowed the Sapnap in the side jokingly. “What’re you trying to say about my game, huh? I got game!” He looked down at her, clutched in his arms, and sighed. “Yeah, you’re probably right. I- I guess we just have to try and convince her you’re not dangerous?”
The Sapnap reluctantly agreed. Ha. Not dangerous, her fluffy ass. The Sapnap clearly could not be trusted. When he wasn’t here, he upset her Boy. When he was here, he hurt her Boy. She would have to keep an eye on him.
—
For almost a month, Patches kept a constant vigil. Whenever the Sapnap dared move, she was stalking his every step, checking he wasn’t getting too close to her Boy.
After a few attempts at stopping them from sitting too close to each other on the Couch, she admitted defeat in that aspect. But every time she caught Sapnap trying to sneak into her Boy’s Room at Night, or reaching out for his hand, or trying to cover his lips with his own again, Patches would see him off with a hiss and a swipe of her claws.
Days passed by in the same way, every move chaperoned by Patches. But one Monday, a week or two after the Sapnap had returned and begun his attack, her Boy left the House without her, or the Sapnap. It drove her insane with worry whenever he went Out with just the Sapnap, but, she was sorry to say, being left alone with the Sapnap was even scarier.
It seemed that no sooner had her Boy shut the front door behind him than the Sapnap was clutching her tight, holding her so that they were making eye contact. Every time she tried to look away, he shifted so that they were staring at each other again.
“Patches,” he began. “We gotta talk this out.” She flicked her tail, irritated. “God, this feels stupid. I’m talking to a fucking cat,” he muttered under his breath. “Okay, okay. Patches, I promise, I’m not trying to hurt Dream. I just want to make out with him a little. And I’m not going to hurt Dream. At least, I’m not intending to. So you don’t need to be protecting him.” He seemed to think. “Actually, no, yes you do, because he’s fucking stupid. But listen, Patches, we can protect him together.”
She twitched her ear, annoyed. He did have a point. It would be easier to look after her Boy if she had a Human ally. And, the Sapnap did seem to at least believe he was telling the truth when he said he wouldn’t hurt her Boy. She had seen the way he hurt when the Sapnap wasn’t there, and now that he was here, she didn’t want to be the one to drive him away again.
She pressed her paw to his cheek in agreement.