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Changbin was only three years old when he realized that the world was a cruel place, when he experienced the bitter reality of what it meant to be a wolf in a vampire’s world.
His first memory wasn’t the warmth of a mother or protection of a father. His first memory was terror – pure terror, with tears streaming down his cheeks as he screamed at the top of his lungs at the sight of a bloodsucker strangling a butler out in the open fields. And if that wasn’t enough, he remembered being shaken by cold hands that threatened to rip his arms apart.
What scarred him the most about the experience were his mother’s words after he had been given back to her. There was no comfort, no love. Just the cry of a bitter woman with a miserable life as she slapped him across the face.
“What were you doing?! I told you to stay inside!” She snarled at him although her eyes were dead inside.
His father scooped him into his arms before his mother could strike him a second time. His father rushed him away into the only closed off area that was safe, the toilet room.
“Stop! Don’t cry! You can’t! Stop!”
His father’s sternness caused his heart to freeze and he immediately swallowed back the sobs that threatened to choke him. He was able to stop his tears, but his body kept trembling and shaking, his arms still tingling from the burn of vampire skin. He swore he saw his father’s eyes soften, but they immediately hardened again.
“Changbin,” His father put him down on the floor and he held back a cry from the loss of warmth and comfort.
Tears still pooled in his eyes, but he didn’t make a sound. He simply just stared up at his father with dark eyes.
“My son, there is no room for tears. You must stop. Do you understand?”
He didn’t. How could a three-year-old pup understand the depth of his father’s words? How could he possibly comprehend the extent of evil that was present in the world? How could he unravel the meaning behind his father’s actions? He didn’t understand. But even though he didn’t, he obeyed.
He toughened up. He didn’t cry. He may not have understood the significance behind his father’s words, but he recognized in that very moment that he could not cry. He could not be weak in a world that devoured the soft. He had to be strong, he had to become unbreakable; or else he would never survive. Most pups wouldn’t have been able to do so, but Changbin did. He hardened up in the world of unrelenting afflictions and unending demands.
His childhood had brutalized him, made him fearless, reckless… impatient. He was impatient. 22 grueling and excruciatingly painful years as a wolf and he was at his wit’s end. Not even his master’s cutting skin scared him anymore. He no longer feared death. What was there to fear about release from the punishing hell that was life? He also no longer feared God. After all, where was the Almighty all this time as his people were suffering? As he was suffering?
Changbin was 12 years old when he realized the Almighty didn’t listen to his petitions and so he stopped praying. A part of him stopped believing as well, but he could never truly not believe. As a wolf, it was in his DNA to believe. So he attended service on Sundays, gave lip service, went to confession – he paid his dues and offered his time. But resentment brewed inside him every time he looked upon the wooden crucifix, when he looked at any cross or symbol of God. And much to his disbelief, apparently he was the only one who felt that way.
He’d think with all the suffering and hell that his people went through, there’d be more wolves like him. But he’d yet to meet a single wolf who held as much animosity as he did for the Son of God.
“The Almighty’s kept me going this far, and He’ll keep me going until the end.” Chan, his alpha, said as they went hunting.
“The Almighty gave us everything. Shifting, souls, life… Without the Almighty, we’re nothing.” Jeongyeon rebuked him, after smacking him across the head for cursing the LORD one drunken night.
“… It’s not God’s fault, people are evil.” Even Seungmin believed, speaking quietly, but boldly with conviction.
“’People,’ he says,” Changbin snorted. “They’re not even people! Those bloodsuckers don’t have souls! Once they’re gone, they’re gone forever! Like any other animal! Like dogs!”
“Either way, it’s not the Almighty’s fault.” Seungmin hummed.
On one hand, it drove him mad. He felt absolutely insane as everyone around him justified their beliefs in the Sovereign One. On the other hand, he felt secretly envious. Because where there was faith, there was hope. And hope was like light in the darkness. In Changbin’s life, there was no light; only darkness. But he didn’t let that faze him or dwell on it for too long. He refused to let faith or darkness stop him. He refused to let anything stop him. After all, if God couldn’t stop him, who could?
His lack of fear regarding anything is what allowed him to breach the boundaries and push forth the plan for his people’s salvation. Finally, his alpha gave him the all-clear to reach out to the Insiders and he would take it. Whether the Insiders were ready or not no longer mattered; Changbin vowed he’d rip the throat of his Head Master tonight regardless.
He had been planning on faking an injury, but of course the runt had to ruin it by lunging for the ball she had no business of reaching. And that lead to an eminent injury.
He snarled. Don’t get him wrong – he was worried about her. Yuna was the youngest in the pack and the most fragile as a half-human. And despite all his complaints about the overgrown pipsqueak who had long surpassed him in height, she was still a pup. His pack’s pup… In a way, his pup. He cared for her deeply, although he’d rather be struck down by the Creator Himself than admit it.
He was planning on waiting half-an-hour before initiating his plan, but he didn’t make it past fifteen minutes. He had waited enough and was impatient to set the plan forth in motion. He shot Seungmin a look and the younger understood. Seungmin always did.
It was because Seungmin understand that Changbin was able to walk to the infirmary with a noticeable injury, a bump the size of a melon on his head. Seungmin’s kick had improved, he thought with a sense of pride. He and Seungmin were practically neck-to-neck in strength, and he was sure the younger would surpass him in no time. He quickly dropped his satisfied smirk into his usual scowl as he approached the pair that were sitting outside the chapel.
Yuna glowered at him, causing him to inwardly smirk while his outer appearance did nothing to betray his internal feelings. The pup was so obvious with her feelings, it was adorable. It was almost hilarious how eagerly she looked after the altar boy, her big brown eyes following Huening Kai’s every move.
Changbin snorted.
Beomgyu would probably have a heart attack if he found out. After all, it wasn’t like her master was very… subtle about his feelings – his grey eyes were fixated on her wherever she was. The same could be said about the vamp attendant who looked at his brother wistfully, her blue eyes following after Seungmin’s every move.
A wolf and a vampire… What an abomination.
He smirked.
There was no way in heaven (or hell) that he would allow a member of his pack, much less his younger brother even entertain the idea of getting with a blood-sucker. Oh how many times Changbin wanted to rip that vampire’s eyes out so she wouldn’t look at his brother like that ever again. But he was patient, biding his time. After all, if everything went well, tonight would be the last time she’d gaze upon Seungmin with her lustful eyes. Changbin would make sure he tore those beautiful blue marbles out of her sockets as a trophy.
Thankfully, Huening Kai had enough awareness to sense his urgency and quickly sent Yuna off with some marzipan and a charming smile, although Changbin was certain the innocent human boy didn’t have a single clue about his effect on the wolf pup (which of course, made the situation even more amusing). Nevertheless, Changbin was grateful for the altar boy’s quick thinking. As Huening Kai tended to the wound on his head, Changbin exercised the last of his patience to wait. He waited until he was certain the courtyard was completely empty before speaking.
“… Is winter upon us yet?” Despite the ominous look in his eyes, Changbin purposely kept his tone light. “I can’t wait any longer.”
He stared into the human boy’s eyes hard. But Huening Kai didn’t flinch. He merely continued dressing the wound on top of Changbin’s head.
“It is.” The altar boy didn’t even blink as he gently pressed against a particular spot he wrapped.
Instantly Changbin knew and he couldn’t control the smirk that played on his lips.
“Have all the leaves fallen?” He chuckled, glee coming over him like a babe at Christmas time.
“By tonight they shall.” Kai didn’t share his pleasure, but he nodded in affirmation. “So we should all get ready for winter.”
“Indeed we will.” Changbin stood up, the smirk remaining on his lips. “Thanks Kai.”
“You’re welcome.” A small smile of uncertainty formed on the human boy’s lips.
Changbin started on his way when Kai’s voice stopped him short.
“…Be careful, Hyung.”
Only God and Changbin knew Huening Kai wasn’t just talking about his futbol injury.
“I will.” He turned around to flash the younger one last smile that was borderline sinister before making his way back to the fields.
Winter is upon us. We’re good to go.
Finally.