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Daniel quickly tossed his keys to the valet as he exited his violet McLaren, trying to hurry without looking hurried. Of course, he was late. He was always running late, but it’s not his fault. It takes time to look this good.
As he entered the restaurant, he scanned the restaurant and saw a familiar flat-brimmed cap in the back. He hurriedly walked over and slid in the booth across from Max.
“You’re late,” Max complained as soon as Daniel’s butt hit the seat.
Daniel grinned at him, “And beautiful, don’t forget beautiful.”
Max gave him an irritated look.
“Honestly, you should expect it by now. Just show up late, too.”
“Or I could just tell you fifteen minutes before I really want you to be there.”
Daniel laughed, reaching across the table to pluck the drink menu from Max’s hands.
“Seriously, though, mate, for someone whose job is dictated by the clock, you are shit at telling time. I have things to do,” Max continued, only half joking.
He was annoyed, Daniel could tell. Well, annoyed to cover his nerves. Max had invited Daniel out for drinks down the street from their apartment, and while he appreciated the view of the ocean, the request was unlike Max, who mostly preferred to game in his room or spend time on the simulator when in Monaco. If that wasn’t enough, the way that Max’s hands were fidgeting with his napkin gave Daniel all the clues he needed to realize Max wanted to tell him something important. Welp, no time like the present…
“Well, since you are so busy, why don’t you tell me the real reason you asked me out tonight?”
Startled, Max looked up at Daniel from the shred of napkins in front him. “Can’t a friend just ask a friend to drinks?”
Daniel gave Max a look. “I might be chronically late, but I’m not slow. Teammate problems? Fight with your engineer? Mercedes contract?” He lifted his eyebrows at the last one, suggestively.
Max gave him another annoyed look and sighed. “I wish.”
“Don’t we all.” The two grinned at the thought. “C’mon mate, tell me what’s up.”
Max took a gulp of his drink before blurting, “IthinkI’minlove.”
It took Daniel a moment to process what Max had said before breaking out into his huge, trademarked smile. “Aww, my little Max is in love!”
“Don’t laugh, okay? I hate talking about this kind of stuff, but I just need some advice,” Max pouted.
“With Kelly, I hope?” Daniel queried, unsure how he would respond if Max said no. He really didn’t believe in infidelity, but he knows about Max’s parents…
“Of course, idiot,” Max sighed, exasperated.
“Well then, what’s the problem? She seems to be on board with the whole relationship thing, judging from, I don’t know, the fact that she’s dating you.”
Max rolled his eyes. “Obviously, but like, should I say it to her?” Daniel went to answer, but Max continued, rambling, “Should I ask her to move in with me? What if she doesn’t feel the same way? And what if she does? Like, she has a kid. Should I be a dad? Or a step-dad? Daniil hates me. What if he punches me? Maybe he should punch me…”
“Slow-down,” Daniel interrupted, putting his hand over Max’s mouth. Max, of course, licked his hand. “Gross.” Daniel wiped his hand exaggeratedly on his pants. “That’s what I get for trying to help you.”
“Sorry,” laughed Max, clearly not sorry at all, “but that was your own fault.”
Daniel smiled, his gesture having the intended effect of pulling his friend out of his anxiety spiral. “Fine. But let’s get back to it. If you feel that way, just tell her. You can work all that other stuff out.”
“It’s not that easy,” Max replied. “Like, I’m not even 100% sure. How do you know when you’re in love with someone?”
Daniel’s smile faltered slightly. “I’m not sure I’m the one you should be coming to for this, Maxy. Maybe ask Nico? Or Sergio? It might be a good way to bond with him…”
Max shook his head. “No, I definitely don’t want to talk about this with anyone else. To be honest, I don’t want to be talking about it with you, but I’m really confused.” Max was almost getting angry at this point. “Why won’t you help me?”
Daniel sighed, looking down at his glass.
“Mate, I’ve never been in love.”
Max looked at Daniel, surprised. “Not ever? Not even Jemma?”
“That was a schoolboy crush. It wasn’t real.” Daniel shifted uncomfortably in his seat. This wasn’t a conversation he was prepared to have. It was a road he’d been down only with himself before. He’d never talked about it with anyone, not even Michael.
“But you’re in your thirties…surely, you’ve been in love with someone, even if she didn’t love you back?” Max asked, but it felt like an interrogation to Daniel, a pointed question that he had asked himself so many times over the years.
“I don’t know what to tell you, Max,” he replied, defensively. “I just haven’t.”
Max looked taken aback at Daniel’s aggression in his response, making Daniel feel guilty. He softened, taking a breath before continuing.
“It’s always been like this for me. It’s like there’s this gene or group of brain cells or something that everyone else has, but somehow, I missed. The thing that makes you go, ‘Yeah, I could spend the rest of my life with that person,’ the one that makes you dream about a house and babies and all of that…I do think about that stuff – I love kids, and I think about being a dad – but in those thoughts it’s just me. Well, me and my mates and my family. Even with Jemma, one of the things we would fight over is how I wanted to spend time with my friends and not with her. It’s not that I didn’t care about her and like doing things with her, especially *those* kinds of things, but I liked doing shit with my mates, too. Michael and Corey and everyone are so important to me. I don’t know, does this make sense?” Daniel rubbed his face, frustrated that he wasn’t able to express what he meant.
Max, patient for once, cautiously replied, “I think so. But maybe you just haven’t met the right girl?”
“I mean, maybe, but like, I’ve had those butterflies and the chemistry and even loved a woman or two, but never in the way I guess you’re supposed to. I love them like I love my mates, but with like sexual attraction bonus. Is that in love? Is that what you feel with Kelly? God, this conversation is so stupid.”
Max looked worriedly at Daniel, not used to seeing the Australian this distressed and lost for words. Normally in their friendship, it was the other way around. “It’s not stupid. Like, I’m the one that brought it up any way, so we don’t have to talk about it anymore if you don’t want to.”
At that moment, Daniel felt so grateful for his friendship with the young man in front of him. “No, it’s fine. But really though? What’s it like? Is it like loving your best friend and wanting to shag them at the same time?”
Max had to laugh at that, in part because it was funny, but more to ease the tension that had grown between them. “I guess it’s like that, but also, there’s more. Like more feelings, more attachment. Like, I’m willing to spend time on the couch watching her stupid shows rather than get on the sim.”
Daniel’s smile finally returned as he chuckled at Max’s comment. “Wow, that is a lot. And here I thought you were going to die someday because your house would be burning down before you got off the sim.”
Max kicked Dan under the table for that comment. “Asshole.”
Daniel kicked him back, but apologized, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make this about me.”
Max snorted. “Really? Because I’m pretty sure you always want to make things about you.”
Daniel kicked Max under the table again. “Ok, but seriously, just tell Kelly how you feel. I do know that the only way to work on any kind of relationship is to communicate.”
“So what you’re saying is what everyone else would have told me? You’re no fucking help.”
“I might be useless, but I am beautiful. Never forget.” Daniel lifted his glass up to cheers.
As their glasses touched, both men were thankful that no matter how their love lives went, they would still have each other.