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1
Zuko jolted awake.
"Who's there?" he called out, rolling into a crouch. He blinked several times, trying to force the sleep from his eyes.
Another twig snapped. His head whipped around, keen ears tracking the sound with ease.
"It's me," a high voice answered from that direction.
"Show yourself!" Zuko yelled. On his feet, stance wide and low in preparation of a fight. He secretly hoped he still came across as intimidating with his hair mussed from sleep and his voice cracking from disuse. He stepped away from his blanket, kicking his discarded overtunic to the side, weary of tripping hazards.
"It's me," the stranger repeated, clearly annoyed, as if he should recognise the voice.
Zuko instantly relaxed as he saw the small girl emerge from behind a tree. Though she didn't bother to put her hands out in front of her in a gesture of peace, he knew she wouldn't hurt him; after all, the young earthbender in front of him was part of the Avatar's group. She was one of the good guys.
He didn't know much about her, but he hoped their lack of history could turn in his favour. They had only briefly seen each other during an altercation with Azula in the Earth Kingdom, and she hadn't even been present during the fall of Ba Sing Se. While her friends had most likely recounted stories of him, there was practically a clean slate between them. Perhaps she would be more willing to give him a chance. He opened his mouth to try and plead his case, but she spoke first.
"So, give it to me straight, Hot Stuff," she demanded, crossing her arms. "What made you wanna join Team Avatar?"
Well, he hadn't been expecting that. A flush rose to his face. "What?" he baulked, trying to keep the incredulity out of his voice. "Hot Stuff?"
"Yeah," she said, frowning. "You know, because you firebend? Last I heard, fire is hot."
"Oh," he said, feeling doubly embarrassed. He looked away. "I thought you meant… uh, nevermind," he quickly amended.
The girl barked in laughter, totally unfazed by their current topic. "What, you thought I was hitting on you?" she said with a sly smile. She looked up, her overgrown bangs moving to reveal pale, unfocused eyes. "Sorry to break it to you, but I can't tell if you're a looker or not. I'm blind." As if to prove her point, she waved a hand in front of her, a ridiculous, shit-eating grin on her face.
"Oh," Zuko sighed, feeling stupid. He'd seen her fight Azula in that abandoned Earth Kingdom town. He hadn't really paid attention to her, but he had definitely seen her as a capable addition to their little gang. How in the world did a little blind girl get to be so good? Were the spirits trying to shame him by surrounding him with prodigies?
"I didn't know," he said, trying to change the subject. "And now that I think about it, I don't really know your name. I'm… I'm Zuko." He silently cursed himself for being so awkward. "But you probably knew that."
She paused, then grinned. "I'm Toph," she said, bending a slab of earth from the ground to rest on. "I'm the greatest earthbender in the world, but you probably already knew that," she teased.
She looked surprisingly noble, sitting as a king would on a throne. "I use the vibrations in the earth to get around. I essentially bend to see," she explained. "First lesson you're gonna learn is not to underestimate me, Hot Stuff. Got it?"
"Got it," Zuko immediately replied, intrigued by the girl before him. He had gone through a difficult period of adjustment when his burn had still been healing, so he felt a spike in appreciation for her feats. Bending with one eye covered in bandages had been frustrating, but he had quickly bounced back after the injury healed. Both eyes, though… he couldn't imagine how Toph did it. He hadn't wanted any pity at the time, of course, so he would not deign to push any towards her now.
"Back to my original question," Toph said, snapping him from his thoughts. "You know we don't believe that you just suddenly had an epiphany or whatever and decided to join us on a whim. So, what actually made you turn good? What happened to make you turn your back on your own family?"
He took a deep breath. He knew it was a more than fair question. Yet his inner struggles also felt a little too private and vulnerable to share with a stranger. After a moment of consideration, he started to speak.
"For a long time, I was… in denial, I guess," he said slowly, still trying to figure out how best to express his thoughts. "I was raised to believe that everything the Fire Nation did was for the good of the world. Even when I was in the Earth Kingdom…" His brow furrowed, and he looked away from the girl before him. "I started to see what things were like on the other side. I cared, but… at the same time, I also didn't. I still just wanted to go home-"
"Why couldn't you?" Toph interrupted, her head cocked to the side.
It was still fairly dark outside, and Zuko's inner flame sent surges of warmth through his skin as he looked to his campfire. That was one thing he had always loved about the Fire Nation- it never got cold enough to need a fire at night. He loved a lot of things about the Fire Nation, but he was also discovering just how much he hated as well. It was unsettling.
"I didn't have a choice," he finally said. "I was banished. The Fire Lord declared I could only come home if I captured the Avatar, and, well… I took that very seriously."
She nodded.
"I'm sorry," he finally sighed, settling down cross-legged a few feet away from her. "I'm sorry I've caused all of you so much trouble. I just… I know it can't make up for all the things I've done, but…" His voice grew soft, and he murmured, "I just wanted to go home."
"And you did," Toph stated, crossing her arms. "So, why are you here, of all places? You wanted everything, and you got it."
He ran a hand through his dark brown hair. "I didn't belong there," he said simply. Hands falling to his lap, he looked at the countless cuts scattered across his fair fingers. "I regained my honour. I had my life back, but it just wasn't me. I… I'd changed so much travelling the world these past three years. And when I finally got home…" He looked up at her, a new resolve hardening his voice. "I realised I just couldn't be the person my father wanted me to be."
A look crossed Toph's face, but Zuko couldn't quite place the emotion. She quickly hid it, her expression neutral once more.
"Three years?" she clarified, quietly. "How old are you, Zuko?"
"I'm 16," he answered.
"So you were banished at 13?" she said, mulling the words over. "I was 13 when I left my home and joined Aang."
When he didn't respond immediately, she continued. "That was just a few months ago. I'm 14 now, and… well, I've changed some, too." She stood suddenly, her stone seat returning back into the earth. At the abrupt movement, Zuko rose with her, a little wary.
"I believe you. You really have changed," she announced. "A lot has happened to you in three years, huh, Sparky?"
"Sparky?" he echoed, annoyance clouding his features. "Is that another nickname-"
"I only give nicknames to people I don't want to beat up," she informed him. "So, I would be honoured if I were you."
He couldn't help but snort at that. Maybe he wasn't as bad at this whole talking thing, after all. Nicknames meant they were basically friends… right?
He'd never really had a friend before.
"Alright, let's hit the hay for now," Toph said, stretching her arms over her head. "We can go rejoin the others in the morning."
"Uh, okay?" he said, somehow knowing he shouldn't argue with this powerhouse of a girl. He watched in fascination as she bent a rock tent from the ground and crawled into it. He settled back into the grass, but didn't reach for his blanket or makeshift pillow.
With his arms crossed behind his head, he whispered, "Thanks, Toph."
"Don't go soft on me, Hot Stuff," came the haughty reply.
He snorted then, before turning to curl up on his side. In no time at all, her heavy snores lulled him into sleep, the sound feeding him pleasant dreams of his uncle.
2
"What are you doing?"
Zuko looked up, surprised by the question. "What?"
"What are you doing, still sitting there?" Toph asked, exasperated. "Didn't you hear Sokka? We're going swimming."
"Oh," Zuko said, still in his meditative pose. "I just… well, I didn't think the others would want me-"
"Swimming is basically code for bathing when you live like we do," Toph informed him, wrinkling her button nose. "And I'm tired of being able to smell you from a mile away!"
Before he could reply in indignation, she turned and walked away to join the others, tossing over her shoulder, "Move your butt before I move it for you, Sparky!"
Feeling flustered, Zuko silently admitted to himself that she had a point. He got to his feet with a flush, trying to ignore the mixed smell of sweat, smoke, and musk on his clothes. Teenagers were teenagers. Neither nationality nor caste changed the fact that a distinctly unpleasant odour clung to nearly everyone in their group. He quietly walked to the group of teens crowded around the bison, hoping he could slip in unnoticed. As his luck would have it, the chatter died down as the others saw him approach. Katara and Aang stood on top of Appa, ruffling through a few saddlebags.
"Hey, Zuko! You're coming, too?" Aang asked, sounding hopeful as a grin split across his face.
"Yeah. If that's okay," Zuko added, hesitant at the scathing look on Katara's face.
"Wait, just how old are you?" Sokka said, leaping forward to bring himself nearly nose-to-nose with Zuko. Despite being several inches taller, Zuko leaned back, more weirded out than intimidated.
"I'm 16," he frowned, annoyed at having his personal space invaded. "Why does everyone keep asking me that?"
"Really?" Sokka replied, a little shocked. He straightened, dropping the handful of rags he had been holding. "You're only a year older than me, then!"
"Sokka," Katara scolded. Her brother quickly gathered up the rags with a sheepish look.
"I think it's just that you're so mature," Aang said, turning to Zuko. "It's not a bad thing! I guess it's just, well- it's easy to forget you're a kid like the rest of us. You're kind of, um..." He trailed off, scratching his head as he searched for the right word.
"Intense?" Sokka offered.
"Broody?" Toph piped up, a hand in the air.
"It's his scar," Katara added, talking about Zuko as if he weren't there. "It makes him look older."
"Katara," Aang quietly reprimanded, sounding almost as hurt as Zuko felt. The older boy briefly met Katara's cold eyes for a moment before she turned away.
"I get it," Zuko mumbled, feeling the familiar pinch of tight skin near his left cheek as he spoke. He did get it, really. But that didn't make it any easier to acknowledge.
A moment of awkward silence pervaded the group, which Sokka then broke.
"Well, I was just making sure you're not, like, creepily older than us," he said, dismissing the thought with a wave. He clambered into Appa's saddle. "I have a little sister to watch out for. You know how it is."
"Not really, no," Zuko deadpanned.
Sokka grimaced.
"Yeah, your little sister can certainly hold her own," Katara scoffed. She shot Sokka an annoyed look. "That's the only thing she and I have in common."
"Anyways," Aang interrupted, trying to look cheerful, "We should get going. There's a stream not too far from here." He finished tucking several large brushes in an empty saddlebag.
"Why don't we just use the bathhouses in the temple?" Zuko inquired. He'd been here before, early on in his banishment. Much like the other nations, the air temples had rooms dedicated solely to washing. He'd actually forgotten about that until now- maybe he should be bathing more often.
"We also have to clean Appa," Aang started, patting his bison gently. "It's a big job, and we'll all get wet, so we might as well help him out first, have some fun swimming, and wash up all at once."
"And I am not cleaning between his toes by myself this time, thank you very much!" Sokka added, voice growing shrill. "I swear, that toe jam didn't come out of my hair for days-"
The others fired back their own witty comments, all at Sokka's expense. But it wasn't malicious in intent. They were just… joking around. Being kids.
Friends.
Zuko looked around them, feeling distinctly left out.
Thankfully, the flight was short, and the firebender spent most of it staring off into the distance while the others laughed and made idle conversation. Once they descended, Sokka and Aang immediately started to strip without reservation. Zuko looked to them, then to the girls, who started walking towards the stream. Turning to Sokka, Zuko asked in a low voice, "So, you all really… bathe together?"
"Yeah," he shrugged, tugging his pants down. "I mean, it's safer than splitting up, and Aang and Katara can splash around with their waterbending." He looked at Zuko from the corner of his eye. "We keep our undies on, though. So as long as you keep your sword in its sheath, we won't have a problem," he warned. "Wash that when you're sure no one's looking."
"You're disgusting," Zuko grumbled, red-face from the innuendo.
"Which is why we're going for a rinse!" Sokka joked, now clad only in his white loincloth, with extra fabric hanging down to better cover his groin. However, when he turned around to race into the water, Zuko got an eyeful of dark buttcheeks hanging out of the rope backside. Quickly averting his eyes, the embarrassed prince turned to see Aang already in the water, wearing just a tiny pair of dark briefs while he tried to convince Momo to get wet. Near the lemur sitting on the rocky shore, Katara took her time shrugging out of her robe, revealing white undergarments similar to Sokka's, though thankfully all of her backside seemed to be covered.
Catching himself beginning to stare, Zuko shook his head slightly before untying his sash. Keeping his eyes firmly on the ground, he folded his tunic and shirt in a neat pile where they had landed. His shoes and shinguards soon followed, but he hesitated, looking to the bison at his right, as though the giant beast could offer any words of encouragement. Appa simply looked at him, lying on the ground with all six legs lazily spread out in a rather comical display. Zuko sighed in return.
"You need help or something?"
"What?" he asked, eyes going wide. He turned to see Toph standing on his other side. When had she snuck up on him? The vision in his left eye wasn't that bad.
"Ugh, are you deaf?" she complained, arms crossed over the wide band of cloth covering her chest. "You're still over here, instead of in the river. I'm assuming you're used to having help with your clothes, right? Well here I am, at your service, Princess." She gave an exaggerated bow.
"Don't call me that," he snapped. Realising he needed to keep his temper at bay, he cleared his throat. "And it's fine. I mean- I'm just-"
He sighed, rubbing his temples in irritation. After a moment, he said in a much calmer voice, "Yeah, I grew up with servants to help me bathe and dress, but I've gotten used to being on my own." He looked around to see the others in the stream, not even trying to be subtle about their eavesdropping. "It's just a little weird being around other people like this."
" You mean... vulnerable?" Toph offered, quirking an eyebrow.
His first instinct was to deny it, but he stopped himself, letting the irritation dissipate with a calming breath. "Well," he said, mulling over her word choice. "Yeah, I guess."
She tugged her headband off, shaking her long, black hair out from its rigid style atop her head. Several pins fell loose, tumbling to the ground at Zuko's feet, but she ignored them.
"So, why would you need help getting undressed?" Aang called to them, scratching his head in confusion. "Why can't you do it yourself?"
Before Zuko could reply, Toph answered. "The richer you are, the more complicated your clothes are," she said simply. "And boy, are nobles and royals the richest snobs of them all! I hated needing people to dress me. Took two of them just to put my most basic qipao on."
"Qi what?" Aang asked, scratching his head.
"It's a kind of dress, Aang," Katara answered. "Only found in the Earth Kingdom, I think."
"Rich people. Ack!" Sokka grumbled, dunking his head underwater in exaggerated contempt.
"You're…" Zuko trailed off. Toph turned to him, and he found the words to voice his thoughts. "You're from nobility?"
"Sure am," she said. "Or was, I should say." She paused, mouth pursed.
"Well, if you don't want any help, I do," she declared, obviously trying to change the subject. She plopped herself down in front of him, her back facing him. "Can you cut my hair? It's getting too long."
Stunned, Zuko looked around to make sure this was actually happening. "What? You want me to cut your hair?" he asked, incredulous.
"Toph!" Katara hissed. "What are you doing?"
Zuko looked to the others for help. The boys simply looked between him and Toph, eyes wide. When his eyes met Katara's, he quickly glanced away from her accusatory gaze.
"Um," he said. "Maybe Katara would-"
"I'm sure Katara would do a lot of things," she said, sending a wave of nausea through Zuko's stomach. He briefly wondered why it sounded like she knew that Katara had threatened to kill him recently. "And if you don't sit down, maybe I'll do some of those things to you," she warned.
He sat down.
"Atta boy," she said, her tone jovial again. "Now just burn it off to, like, my shoulders. It's getting too hot and heavy."
"But you have such beautiful hair," Katara protested. She looked to Sokka and Aang, as if they would back up her claim, but the boys clearly didn't want to argue with Toph.
Zuko sighed, resigned to his task. However, he didn't use his bending. He leaned back to recover the Earth Kingdom knife hidden in one of his boots, and he unsheathed it under Katara's watchful gaze.
Gathering Toph's hair with one hand, he shivered when his knuckles brushed against her mostly-bare back. After a calculating look, he sawed his way through the strands before incinerating the loose hair with a controlled burst of fire.
"Thanks, Sparky," she said, running a hand through her short, black hair. "I feel a lot lighter already. Think I should go for the Air Nomad look next?"
He couldn't help it. The comment caught him so off-guard that he actually chuckled.
She half-turned to face him, and he could see her eyes furrowed in surprise. His smile faltered at her expression, but before he could open his mouth, she answered his unspoken question.
"I didn't think you knew how to laugh," she said, honestly.
"Of course I know how to laugh," Zuko said, growing defensive.
Katara made a disparaging remark directed at him, but Zuko didn't respond. His full attention rested on Toph.
"Whatever," she said, holding her hands up in mock defeat. "So you can laugh, alright." Then with a sly grin, she gripped him around a wrist. "But can you swim?"
With unexpected strength, she hauled them both to her feet. He let her manhandle him, mostly because he was curious to see what she would do. A few seconds later, though, and he found himself regretting it.
"Toph!" he barked, the younger girl having forced him to take a step into the stream. "Ugh, it's so cold."
Katara looked at their horseplay with more disapproval, but Aang and Sokka just laughed at the uncomfortable look on Zuko's face. Ultimately, the former prince decided to stop struggling, and he allowed himself to be dragged forwards until both his feet were fully submerged.
While Toph stayed in the shallow end, she released her hold on Zuko so he could venture deeper. He sighed, half-irritated to still be wearing his pants, but also kind of glad that he wasn't totally stripped bare for everyone to see. After adjusting to the water's low temperature, he only felt relief in having the grime rinsed from his skin. Aang gladly shared their single bar of soap, and Katara eventually tossed him a washcloth. After washing his torso, Zuko dunked his head underwater, eager to rinse his shaggy hair as well.
"So, jerkbender," a sarcastic voice said from behind him. Zuko turned to see Sokka swimming towards him, loose hair framing his face. "Theoretically, could you, say, heat up a stream like this with firebending? Theoretically, of course."
Zuko smirked, and without a word, steam began to pour off him in waves. "Theoretically."
"Ah," Sokka sighed, clearly content when the warmth reached him. "Not bad, jerkbender. Not bad."
"Oooh," Aang moaned, falling out of his waterbending stance when the warmth spread to him. "That feels nice."
"You need to learn how to do that, Aang," Katara mumbled, sinking further into the water.
"So, you're more useful than we thought," Toph said. "Be careful, we might just put you on cooking duty next, Sparky."
He shook his head in amusement. He really didn't know what to think of her, so he tried to play her game. "Sure thing… Rocky."
He grunted when a fist-sized stone slammed into his shoulder.
3
He woke at the faint sound of a door opening.
"Who's there?" Zuko growled, still half-asleep, but ready for a fight nonetheless.
"It's me," Toph said. Then she laughed. "We really need to stop meeting like this."
He rolled his eyes before laying back down. "Did you need something?" he asked. "I was kind of sleeping."
"Kind of sleeping," Toph echoed, inviting herself inside the small, stone room. "More like having a nightmare. I could hear you crying from-"
"I don't cry," he snapped, sitting up in bed once more. He glared at her, despite knowing it wouldn't do anything. He wished he could see her better, but he could only just make out the faint outline of moonlight behind her as she came through the doorway.
The sound of her movements stopped. She paused and then asked in a low voice, "Not even when you got your scar?"
Zuko's body froze, as though his inner fire had been doused with ice. "Go away," he snarled, when he finally gathered the courage to speak.
"Zuko-"
"Leave!" His arm swung out in a wide arc in front of him, briefly bathing the room in an orange glow. Toph, however, was faster. A wall of earth rose to block his flames, and the burst of light died as quickly as it had come.
He panted, clearly emotional from both his nightmare and her words. His bare chest shone with sweat, and his fists fell to his sides, still clenched.
"I'm not going anywhere," Toph announced, allowing her wall to slide back into the ground. She stepped towards him. "I don't know who burned you, but they're gone now," she said, her voice almost urgent. "You need to move on, Zuko. You can't afford to be distracted."
When he didn't respond, she continued. "They're gone," she said, more forcefully. "Whoever hurt you isn't here. But I am. And like it or not, I'm your friend. All of us are."
His mind flashed through images of him and Aang, with colourful dragonfire swirling around them. He saw Teo give him a grateful smile when he lifted the boy's wheelchair from a deep crack in the temple's floor. He remembered discreetly slipping The Duke a spare pair of pants when the 7-year-old had admitted to wetting himself after a bad dream. Then thoughts of the other day surfaced- how Zuko had jumped for the prison gondola, with nothing but a boiling lake below him, and how Sokka had caught him by the forearm and pulled him to safety. How Suki had fought alongside him without hesitation, smoothly defending his blind spot from one of Ty Lee's chi-blocking attacks. And just twelve hours ago, he had shaved alongside Haru, Chit-Sang, and Hakoda, enduring some good-natured teasing about the patchy, uneven hair that grew on his jawline every morning.
He even thought back to the crystal catacombs with Katara. For all that the waterbender hated him, some part of him still considered her a friend.
Of all these tentative new relationships, Zuko had built a trust with Toph unlike any other. He admired her bending, and envied her self-esteem. She was funny, of course, but also dangerously perceptive; despite not being able to read a book, she could read a room with unrivaled ease. She was quicker than a whip, and she always knew more than she let on. His eyes scanned her desperately, struggling to see her in the dismal darkness.
"You can't even see," he finally said, not really caring how tactless he probably sounded. "How do you know it's a burn?"
"I didn't even know you had a scar until Katara mentioned it," she huffed. "Remember, the first time you went to wash with us? She said it so casually, like everyone knew! Nobody ever tells me anything-"
She shifted, and he saw it- a twinkle of light. Since her impromptu haircut by the lake, she had taken to wearing her hair in a small bun rather than the sweeping, neatly-tucked updo she had worn before. But now, in the middle of the night, the ends of her hair cascaded down to her shoulders, free of any ties.
"And it seemed pretty obvious that it'd be a burn, since you're a fire-"
"Your hair," he said, not realising he was thinking out loud. "It's gotten longer, again. Since I cut it."
"What?" Her hand reached up to brush the hair from her neck, and more specks of light filtered through the long strands, cast from the moonlight behind her. He was worried she might be weirded out by his random comment, but she only seemed a little confused.
"My hair used to be long," he said, thinking back to the high tail he wore as a preteen. "But after I- after-" he faltered. "Some of it was shaved off by the healer. Quite a bit had just… burned off. I was worried it wouldn't grow back right, if at all."
"Well?" She took a seat next to him on the stone slab where he slept. "Did it grow back?" He felt the pull of the blanket beneath him as she gripped the silky material in a tight fist, as if she were almost afraid to hear his answer.
"Most of it," he sighed. "I think it looks alright."
"I wouldn't know," she said, giving a small shrug. "As you so kindly pointed out, I don't know what you look like."
"I know," was all he said, though he was careful to keep the sympathy from his voice. He didn't pity her, and he wouldn't want her to think he did. Her blindness was as much a part of her as his scar was now; something that could be lived with, given time.
"So, tell me," she said.
"Tell you what?"
"I want to know what you look like," she said, matter-of-factly. She turned her head towards him. "Describe yourself to me. What do you look like, Zuko?"
He swallowed, unsure of where he should even begin. "I'm… not very tall," he started. "Well, I'm taller than the rest of you, I guess."
"Yeah, yeah, I hear Sokka complaining about it all the time," Toph dismissed. "You boys and your fragile egos. What else?"
The ends of Zuko's lips quirked into a small smile without his consent. "I look very Fire Nation. Dark hair, light skin, and amber eyes-"
"Eh, colours don't mean anything to me," she interrupted.
"But you wanted me to-"
"Don't use descriptors I wouldn't know about," she scolded lightly. "I was born blind, so those facts won't do me any good. Tell me what you look like in shapes, and sizes, and feelings."
A little bewildered by her request, Zuko had to take a moment and truly think.
"I used to be quite muscular," he said. "Kind of… thick all around, I suppose? I worked myself half to death training every day, preparing to face an Avatar who supposedly had a century of bending prowess."
Toph snorted at his presumption of Aang, but allowed him to continue.
"I lost a lot of weight as a refugee, though," he admitted. "I'm more… lean now. Better than I was in the Earth Kingdom, but…" he swallowed back the shame he felt rising in his throat. "When I went back to the palace, I saw a physician. She said I was really malnourished. I… might have stunted my growth." He shifted uncomfortably, before trying to change the subject. "My face is sharper now." He paused.
"My hair is getting longer. I got it trimmed a few weeks before I joined you guys, but it grows pretty quickly. It's still barely long enough for a topknot, but I can still manage one. It's not thick, but not thin, either- kind of like yours. And I… I only have one eyebrow."
"I'm guessing because of your scar," Toph ventured.
"Yeah," Zuko said, fighting the urge to clam up. It was only fair that Toph knew. After all, everyone knew without him having to say a word. So, he pushed through. "It covers… maybe a third of my face. It's on the left side, with the worst of it directly over my eye. It… also got my ear." He swallowed. "It's a little lumpy now. Doesn't feel quite right anymore."
"Can I touch it?" she asked, her voice regaining its usual mischief. "Not your ear. Your scar." He could tell she was grinning, as if only now finding the right time to ask the long-awaited question.
Nearly a minute passed in silence, but he didn't know how to respond.
"Blind people touch faces all the time," she asserted, sitting up a little straighter. "It's not a big deal for us."
Zuko knew that was a blatant lie. He had met a blind man before- the son of a general in his father's court. Touching faces was most definitely odd, for sighted and blind people alike. But above all else, it sounded so… intimate.
He didn't call out her fib, though. She wasn't begging, demanding, or simply taking. She was asking. Waiting for permission. Almost like she wanted an excuse to stay awake with him a little longer. Or maybe he was projecting his own thoughts.
"No," he said quietly. It was too soon for that. "Please don't."
Her own face was just inches from his now, and she didn't shy away from his personal space. "Can you even see out of this eye?" she asked, suddenly frowning.
"Yeah," he said, his lids falling shut. "Not at first, but most of it came back with time."
"Most of it," she echoed, clearly displeased with the thought.
"I was 13," he whispered, the words escaping his mouth before he could stop them. "I learned to live with it."
"Weren't you banished at 13?" she asked.
"...Yes, he said, pressing his own fingers into the skin beneath his left eye. He couldn't exactly feel it on his face. His nearby unblemished skin moved slightly in response to his fingers, and it was only that faint pressure that allowed him to discern touch on the damaged flesh.
"Hmm," she said, fishing for a more in-depth response. "Wonder if they had anything to do with each other."
He didn't say anything.
"So your hair grows fast, huh," she said instead. "Want me to cut it for you?"
Stifling a laugh, Zuko politely declined, hand falling from his face. "No, thanks. I'd like to keep what's left of that ear."
And then she laughed. Not the obnoxious, throaty laugh she used when egging Sokka on. Nor was it the devious chuckles he had heard growing up around Azula, or the demure giggles typical of noble women. This laugh was sincere, and it was just so… so… Toph, for lack of a better word.
Her voice echoed in the silent temple, even long after she left his room. Zuko decided that he rather liked the sound.
4
Hiding from the Fire Lord in his own house felt odd, to say the least.
Toph frowned at the wooden floorboards, but didn't complain. She shuffled forward, trying to get a rough idea of her surroundings from the comments her friends were making.
"This place is huge!" Sokka exclaimed. "Katara, our entire village could live here."
"Hmm, I can get used to living like royalty," Suki joked, throwing her boyfriend a look. "Start taking notes, Sokka."
"Yeah. I guess it's... nice," Aang said, still sounding weary of spending time in his enemy's long-forgotten summer home.
Toph felt Katara's skirts brush against her calf as the older girl passed, and Toph found herself taking a few tentative steps forward. With hardly a thought, she brushed her hair over one shoulder, finding the feeling of it against her bare skin relaxing. Ever since Zuko had told her he liked her hair down, she hadn't bothered to put it up since. While at first reluctant to take a boy's opinion into consideration, she found she actually enjoyed the feel of the air whipping through her hair as she fought. She was glad he said something, otherwise she would have never thought to try it.
A familiar tug of earth drew her two more steps away from her friends. It was very close by, and she wanted to find it. She turned her head somewhat to her left, and she could feel eyes on her as she took another step towards her goal.
"What are you doing?" Katara asked, puzzled.
"I feel something made of earth," Toph said. Standing on the tips of her toes, Toph reached out, hesitant. Her fingers wrapped around a clay disk, the shape of a tiny hand forever imprinted in the center. "What is it?"
Zuko cleared his throat. "Oh. That's, ah… a cast of my handprint. From when I was a kid," he said, sounding self-conscious. "I made it for my mother."
"Aw," Suki cooed, and Toph couldn't help but smirk as she pressed her larger hand against the imprint. "I wonder what other baby-Zuko memorabilia we can find here," Katara teased.
"Let's figure out where everyone's sleeping," Zuko said, sounding distracted. He began walking, and the others turned to follow him. Katara brushed up against Toph once again, and the younger girl followed closely as to not bump into anything.
"Ugh, whatever you do, don't put me in your parents' room," Sokka complained. "I don't wanna think about the Fire Lord getting it on."
"Ew, Sokka!" Katara cried out, her face twisted in a frown. "Don't say things like that."
Zuko, however, did not seem amused. Instead of being embarrassed by the comment, he ground his teeth together. Hard.
"My parents had separate rooms," he said, trying to keep his voice even. "Marrying for love is rare amongst Fire Nation royalty. I'd imagine that, until it's time to make an heir, you'd want some space after being married off to a complete stranger…"
"Wait, what?" Katara said, already indignant at the thought. "That's crazy! Who marries someone they don't love?"
The firebender made a noise in his throat that Toph didn't recognise. "I don't think my father is capable of loving anyone," he mumbled. "There was a time when things were… fine. But I was very young." He paused, stopping outside the first bedroom, and everyone else came to a stop behind him. "Now that I'm older… well, I have my doubts that things were ever really fine."
As if just remembering who Zuko's father was, Toph felt Katara turn away from them, the only outward acknowledgement of the horror they felt.
Everyone took their room assignments in silence.
A few hours later, Toph felt for the power in his stance.
While it was no earthbending stance, Zuko still had a strong root. She leaned in closer, bare feet still planted flat on the ground.
Sleek muscles shuddered beneath his skin as he went through a firebending kata with Aang, and she could feel his every powerful intake of breath. While much of his body tensed and clenched with every form, she could tell he wasn't trying to force the fire out of his body through sheer physical strength. It was something deeper inside himself, stoked with the expansion of his lungs and the clenching of his diaphragm- the latter being something she could just barely feel with her seismic sense. Firebending required benders to spontaneously create their element from within themselves, unlike every other form of bending. Zuko had told them that fire was born of the breath, and Toph had been trying to feel for it all afternoon.
She ultimately decided the art form was odd, but satisfying; not unlike the former prince himself.
She also pretended not to care as Zuko and Aang finished their training and dutifully bowed to one another. So instead, she listened quietly as Katara lightly scolded them. "Next time, take a break! We didn't want to start without you."
The boys apologised, and quickly sat at the small, rectangular table under the veranda. Standing, Toph took her place at one end while Sokka and Suki emerged from the house.
"Ugh, put on a shirt, jerkbender," Sokka groaned. He took a seat next to Suki and across from his sister.
"What? Why?" Zuko asked, confused.
"It's not fair," he asserted. "You're a master firebender, and you can use not one but two swords. And now you're out here looking like- like-" his skinny arms flailed. "Like this!"
"You just gestured to all of me," Zuko scowled.
"Are you saying Zuko's hot?" Toph chimed in. "Because I would like to know. You know, for science." She grinned, and she wondered if she'd made him blush.
"Well, he's not not-hot," Suki said rather candidly, earning a burst of laughter from the table, with the exception of Sokka and Zuko. In that moment, Sokka and Zuko both probably wanted to be her so they could disappear into the ground.
"Well-"
Everyone turned to look at Zuko, who just seemed to realise he had started speaking out loud. He looked down, sounding embarrassed. "At least it distracts from my face," he said, voice barely above a whisper.
"That's also handsome, too," Sokka interjected, trying to cheer his friend up, and Toph was pleased to find him telling the truth. "Your face, I mean… In a friendly, man-to-man kind of way, of course."
"Of course," Zuko said, a small smile tugging at his lips.
"I found some baby pictures of you in the attic earlier," Katara piped up, voice rising with excitement. "You were so cute- I'll have to bring them out later!"
Zuko shifted, clearly uncomfortable. His breathing became shallow, and Toph cocked her head.
"Oh, I wanna see Baby Zuko!" Sokka cried out, immediately cheered up. "I bet you were a really grumpy baby, too, weren't you?"
Zuko's heartbeat felt… off.
When there was no reply, Aang tentatively said, "Zuko?"
But before Zuko could come up with an answer, a rock the size of a watermelon came hurling towards his face. He tumbled backwards, his chair tipping over, and he landed in a half-crouch on the ground as the rock crashed into the wall behind him.
Everyone looked to the other end of the table, where Toph was already dredging up another rock from the ground.
"What are you-"
Unable to finish his thought, Zuko threw himself to the side to avoid the next incoming projectile, too afraid to use his bending so close to his friends.
"Toph!" Katara raged, shifting into her own stance as if to attack the younger girl. "What do you think you're-"
Toph ignored her, instead sending Zuko flying several yards away with a sudden jut of the ground.
"Wait," Aang said, suddenly, grasping Katara's wrist. Everyone was on their feet now, watching the battle unfold.
"What are you doing?" Zuko shouted, standing in the adjoining courtyard with a fist pulled back, ready to strike.
In lieu of answering, Toph grinned.
The two sparred viciously, neither holding back with their respective bending. After just half an hour, both were breathing heavily. Toph's hair had grown wild, shrouding her face in a breezy curtain of hair. The edges of her pants were singed, with very minor first-degree burns splattered across her shins. Zuko probably looked just as undone- she could tell he was favouring his right side, where his rib cage had taken one too many blows.
The firebender tried to rush her once more, and Toph didn't raise a finger. At the last moment, Zuko must have realised she didn't have any intention of defending herself. The fire died on his fingertips, but he couldn't quite stop his momentum in time. He crashed into her with a yelp, and both teens went spiralling into the fountain behind her.
Scrambling off of her, Zuko looked to her with wide eyes. "Are you crazy?" he yelled, his temper naturally taking control. He sounded truly angry for the first time during their fight. "Why didn't you move? I could have really hurt you!"
"But I knew you wouldn't," she said, her voice strangely calm. She tilted her head towards him, and began to pull the hair back from her face, tucking it behind her ears. "You needed an outlet, so I gave you one. Just a little spar, and a quick cool-off. Feel better now?"
He sounded aghast. "What?" he stuttered.
"Do you feel better?" she asked again, getting to her feet.
Still on his knees, Zuko looked down to his hands, clenching them as if he was considering her question carefully. "Yeah," he finally said. "I… I do."
"Why don't you people ever talk about your feelings?" Katara grumbled from several feet away, still standing with the others. "You know, like normal people!"
"We're not exactly normal," Toph shot back. "Daddy Issues over here is back in his childhood home. You think he wouldn't have some pent up anger about it? What about his life has been normal? What about any of our lives has been normal?"
Nobody had an answer to that.
Ignoring the new and awful nickname she had given him, Zuko stood, towering over Toph by nearly a foot. "Thanks," he said, so low that the others almost couldn't hear.
A big, showy yawn interrupted them. "Wow, that… spectacle… sure tired me out," Aang said, completely unconvincing. "We should, ah, head to bed. Right, Sokka? And Katara. And Suki…"
Attuned to Aang's strange behaviour, Katara also put on an act. "Oh! Yeah. So tired," she said. Suki followed their lead, tugging a noticeably confused Sokka behind her.
And then there were two.
"Thanks, Toph," Zuko said, also grateful to have some privacy from the others. "I don't think I knew just how much I needed that."
She crossed her arms, turning at a slight angle so he couldn't quite meet her sightless gaze. "I wouldn't know how to act if I was suddenly back at home," she admitted. "But I figured one of the first things I would do is pick a fight, and that maybe it'd help take your mind off things, too."
The sun was already setting behind them, and a gentle chill blew through the quiet space between them.
"You're… a good friend," Zuko said, not realising just how true the words were until they left his mouth. Because they were friends, after all.
Toph couldn't help it. She embraced him. The hug was tentative at first, but as she tightened her grip, he seemed to let himself hold her tighter, too.
5
The play was pretty good. It was exaggerated at times, and completely inaccurate at others, but for the most part, it was exactly what Toph thought a dramatization of their adventures would be like. It helped that Toph's parts were ridiculously cool, of course; but just about everybody else had some major qualms about the Ember Island Players production.
"You don't get it," Zuko snapped at her, once they were alone in the hallway. "It's different for you. You get a muscly version of yourself, taking down ten bad guys at once, and making sassy remarks."
"Yeah, that is pretty great," Toph hummed, not seeing his point.
Zuko hung his head."But for me, it takes all the mistakes I've made in my life, and shoves them back in my face." His voice softened. "My uncle... he's always been on my side, even when things were bad. He was there for me. He taught me so much, and how do I repay him?" He scoffed. "With a knife in his back. It's my greatest regret, and I may never get to redeem myself."
"You don't need to redeem yourself," Toph told him, shifting slightly to face him, her voice uncharacteristically quiet.
"What?" Zuko said, sounding almost affronted. "Of course I-"
"You don't need to redeem yourself, because you already have," Toph continued, as if he'd never spoken. "Look… I once had a long conversation with the guy, and all he would talk about was you."
"Really?"
"Yeah. It was super annoying."
"Oh… sorry," Zuko murmurs, head falling into his hands in defeat.
"But," Toph emphasizes, "it was also really sweet. All your uncle wanted was for you to find your own path, and to do the right thing. Now you're here with us. He'd be proud of you, Zuko."
The tension in Zuko's shoulders dropped just slightly, relief flooding his chest at her words. So, that's when she decided to strike. She punched him in the bicep, hard.
"Ow!" he yelped. "What was that for?" He rubbed at the sore muscle.
She smiled, as if it should have been obvious. "That's how I show affection."
A little boy ran past them, but then stopped short in front of them, turning slightly to get a better look at the pair. "Your Zuko costume's pretty good, but your scar's on the wrong side," he announced, before running off again.
"The scar's not on the wrong side!" Zuko yelled, his reaction so out of proportion to the kid's comment that other patrons turned to look at them. The little kid faltered, but didn't reply, thankfully. Zuko yanked his hood down over his face, heart racing, arms clenched tightly across his chest.
"What's the big deal?" Toph asked, not understanding. Sometimes seeing-eye people could be so sensitive. "So, it's on the wrong side-"
"What's the big deal?" Zuko demanded, turning to glower at her. "This play is obviously wartime propaganda. That means the Players had to get approval from someone in the palace to even get this shit show into production." He started speaking quickly now, panic seeping into his every word. "Everybody in the capital knows how I got my scar. Everyone was there- I- I can't believe it doesn't even matter to them, Toph. My father burned off half my face, and he can't even remember which side it was?!"
Toph was stunned into silence. She sat there for a moment, just listening to Zuko's quick, shallow breaths, feeling his heart nearly pounding out of his ribcage with every beat.
That… was the truth.
He was telling the truth. His father gave him that scar.
For once in her life, Toph was completely speechless. She was horrified.
"I cried," he said suddenly, voice impossibly small. "You were right, when you said- that night you were in my room, at the Western Air Temple? I cried. I was on my knees, begging him to forgive me, and he just-" Zuko sniffed, lowering his head, presumably so that no one could see his tears right then. "He said suffering would teach me respect."
A tremor ran up Toph's body, and her fists clenched with rage. But Zuko didn't need anger. He had plenty of that to go around. "I'll kill him," Toph finally said, as calmly as she could manage without throwing the entire theater into a sinkhole. "I'll kill that bastard. If Aang can't, I'll do it, Zuko. You just say the word."
Zuko gave a wet chuckle. "Thanks. You're- you're a good friend."
Toph turned to fully face him, and she could feel his gaze on her when she said, "And you're a good son. You didn't deserve that, Zuko. Any of it. He doesn't deserve you."
"I know," came the stilted reply. "It took me a while, but I- I know that now."
They went quiet for a few long moments. Not knowing quite what else to do, Toph punched him again, but this time, a little softer.
"Ow," Zuko grumbled, but she can tell from his tone of voice that he's smiling again.
+1
For the second time in her life, Toph willingly embraced someone.
At the mention of splitting up to find Aang, she immediately threw herself into Zuko's personal space, wrapping herself around one of his arms.
"I'm going with Zuko!" she declared.
Judging by the boy's racing heart, she could tell he was a little embarrassed. He likely hadn't been expecting her outburst, and the rest of the group when quiet as well.
"What?" she asked, turning her head to face her friends. "Everyone else went on a life-changing trip with Zuko. Now it's my turn." She leaned into him, forcing the surprised boy back a step.
"Ah, okay," Sokka finally said, shrugging off her declaration. "Let's get looking then."
The teens went their separate ways, and Zuko gently pried Toph from his arm.
"Ah, we should probably start with the coast," he fumbled, trying to regain his composure.
She allowed him to untangle their arms, but not before slipping her hand in his. "What's wrong, Sparky?" she teased, a smirk on her face. "Never been this close to a girl before?"
"What?" he choked out, the usual irritation creeping back into his raspy voice. "Of course I have- not that it's any of your business. I just don't know why you need to touch me now."
Sensing the truth in his words, her blind eyes gleamed. "Interesting," she thought. Though she knew Zuko had been a bonafide prince at one point, she hadn't ever thought of him in such a situation.
"I'm just trying to get to know you better," she huffed, tugging him along the beach. "I know you're the dark and brooding type, but it wouldn't kill you to talk now and then."
"I don't brood," Zuko defended, allowing himself to be half-dragged. "And I talk all the time."
She rolled her eyes. "Then start talking," she replied. "Tell me about your last girlfriend."
"What?"
He jerked his hand from hers, and she stopped walking to face him. While it didn't make a difference to her, she knew sighted people sure liked to look at each other when speaking. She could feel him getting worked up over something, and hope sparked in her that maybe this search for Aang wouldn't be so boring.
"Why would you ask that?" he said, slight confusion shining through his gruff voice. He crossed his arms over his chest and added, "That's personal."
The 14-year-old girl exhaled, letting the annoyed puff of air blow a lock of hair out of her eyes. "Seriously, why am I always repeating myself with you? I just said I wanted to get to know you better, and it's not like you were gonna start a conversation." Turning back around, she started walking again. "You all are so sensitive!"
A faint growl came from behind her, and after a moment's hesitation, his footsteps followed.
They walked in silence for a few more moments before he mumbled, "Do you remember Mai?"
Toph bit back a bout of laughter. "Please don't tell me this is going where I think it's going," she said, disbelief clear in her voice. "You… you and Mai?"
"Why do you sound so surprised?" Once again, Zuko was on the defensive. She decided to cut him some slack.
"I guess I shouldn't be," she mused. "I mean, you all grew up together, so it would make sense. But I can't say I care for her, Ty Lee, or your sister."
"She's not like Azula," he said, his voice growing somewhat soft. His pace slowed, and she fell back to match his gait. "I broke her heart when I left to join you guys. And yet, she still helped us escape from the Boiling Rock. She defied Azula to save us."
"You mean to save you," Toph corrected, frowning. "And you say you broke her heart? I'm starting to think maybe you're the jerk here, and not her…"
"I know I didn't end things the right way," he confessed. "But I didn't want to drag her into this mess. She doesn't deserve to be branded a traitor, although that's probably exactly what's happened by now."
"Do you love her?"
She could feel him run a hand through his hair, and for a second, she thought that perhaps she had overstepped a boundary. Before she could crack a joke to deflect the tension, he answered her honestly.
"No," he whispered. "I think… I think that part of my life is over now."
Nodding thoughtfully, Toph walked on. "And what part of your life are you in now?" she asked. "What are you gonna do once Aang kills your dad?"
His ear twitched at the mention of his father, but neither commented on it. "I really don't know. What are you going to do?"
She exhaled sharply, blowing her bangs from her face in exasperation. "No idea," she said. "I don't think I can go home, though. I...I love my parents, and I miss them. But I'm just not the kid they wanted."
Her breath hitched as she felt a large, warm palm slip into her left hand. She tilted her head upwards, allowing him to see the soft smile on her face. He clearly knew how that felt.
"That's… I'm sorry," Zuko said, fumbling for an empathetic response. "But we really need to look for Aang, and-"
"Ugh," Toph sighed, shaking her head at the boy on her left. "You ruined the moment, Sparky."
"We were having a moment? Ow!" With his free hand, he rubbed his other bicep. "Why do you keep hitting me? Can you be a little less 'affectionate,' please?"
"As far as I'm concerned, you should be lucky I like you," she said with a shrug.
He looked away, as if suddenly shy. "I... like you, too," he finally mumbled, sounding uncharacteristically timid.
First, they would find Aang.
Then, they would defeat the Fire Lord.
And after that, Toph would figure out what these gross, squishy feelings in her chest meant.
She gently squeezed his hand.
Right now, though, she was content to just be there for him.
As a friend.