Archive of Our Own

“So. I suppose this is goodbye.” Jimin says. The airport is buzzing with people around them, all moving and running to catch their flights, going home , leaving home, about to explore the world. Only the two of them, Jimin and Yoongi, stand there, in the middle of the vast area before the safety check-ins and it feels like the clock has stopped. 

Yoongi nods. “ I suppose so.” 

Jimin fidgets with his fingers, and Yoongi notices how the ring shines against Jimin’s tan skin. So many days under the European sun only made him even more handsome. Yoongi can’t take his eyes off of him, no matter how much he tells himself that he should. He just wants one more look, one more touch, one more second looking at Jimin. “Will you call?” The younger’s voice is soft and melodious, but there’s a nostalgic lyricism to it today. 

Yoongi wishes he could. And he wants to. His heart sighs in his chest at the thought of spending long nights on the phone with Jimin, hearing his sweet voice from the other side of the world. But these are only dreams that have to be killed in the womb so he shakes his head, letting logic rule over him. “Probably not.”

Jimin nods, pursing his lips. “Probably for the better.”

Better for both of them , Yoongi thinks. Jimin isn’t meant to be his. They’re not meant to have more than this. These few days worth of booming laughs while running down a paved street, of quick german food shared by the river, of longing looks exchanged in the intimacy of a bus ride. But he doesn’t say more. This is all they’re allowed to have. Suddenly, a voice calls again for the passengers of Jimin's flight. 

This is it. This is the end. Throat tight, and heart crushed at his feet, Yoongi braces himself. 

“Take care of yourself, okay?” He says, trying to keep a clear voice. 

“You too, hyung.” Jimin says, and with a heavy sigh, he grabs his handbag and turns around. Yoongi stays there, standing as he watches Jimin go through the boarding checks. He waits as Jimin goes through everything, waits as the younger puts his jacket and shoes back on. Then, he watches and stands there as Jimin turns around, one last time, before waving goodbye at Yoongi. 

It’s a small gesture. But somehow, it’s enough to break the dam of Yoongi’s composure, and a small tear escapes on his cheek. He just prays that Jimin is too far away to see, too far away to know. 

- a week earlier  - 

No one would have ever thought that Yoongi would become a tour guide. The little child that was obsessed with music growing up? A tour guide? Tsk, no way. Although money was never tight, from a very young age, Yoongi understood that if you wanted something, especially money, you needed to work for it. He started by selling his notes in class to his other classmates. A small business but by the end of secondary school, everyone knew that if they wanted nicely written notes to copy from, Min Yoongi was the one to call. When he started high school, he kept doing it, and soon enough, he was making enough extra money to pay for his own groceries. In university, he studied music theory, with a minor in languages, which in the end proved to be more helpful as it’s now his main job. With a nice collection of languages under his belt, his application as a tour guide was undeniably already accepted. Who else can say they speak Korean, Japanese, Chinese, English, Hindi, French, Spanish, and Portuguese? If asked, Yoongi will say it’s nothing and he’ll just shrug because that’s just who he is. But he’s proud. He’s proud of where it got him. 

All these hours of making sure every class notes was written neatly, every hour he spent learning the languages himself, because not everyone listens to music, but everyone wants to travel. Because that’s the thing with Yoongi. He never really studied music because he wanted to work in the field, no, it was always only a hobby. Something he loved, and loves still. But it was never the main goal. And being a tour guide is a good thing, it makes him happy. Travelling to different places is a good thing. Sometimes, when he’s in a hotel room, or sitting at a café at dusk, and there’s someone playing the violin in the streets, he thinks this is it. This is how he wants to appreciate music. Not behind a desk, with headphones on and the world turned off. This is good, this is what he likes. 

He wonders sometimes though, if there’s more. When he sees a couple, hanging out by the Thames or sharing a lemon meringue pie sitting on the docks by the Seine, he wonders. Is there more to life? Can he have it? What would he even do with it? Would he even recognize something like this if it were to happen to him? Sometimes he thinks he doesn’t want it. But then, when he’s alone at night, going back to his empty hotel room, he craves it. He longs, yearns for that feeling of belonging, of love, of peace and calm that people often mention. That feeling of being home. 

But then , given his current situation, it’s not like he can settle down. He’s in a different country almost every other week. How do you build a home when you’re living out of a suitcase? Who would even stay for that? 

Out of every place he’s visited, Hamburg probably is his favorite city. He’s not sure why, but there’s something about it. Something about people walking and not caring and just living their lives. There’s something very simple about the city, not that much traffic as the people prefer their bikes. Whenever he sees a couple of teenagers riding their bikes to school, Yoongi is reminded of a friend back in university, Kim Namjoon. The tall man was never seen without his bike. Yoongi never really talked to him as they only shared two classes, french grammar and poetry history. But he wonders what Kim Namjoon is doing sometimes. Yoongi remembers seeing him often with a tall man with a loud laugh. He wonders about them often, what they were. 

He likes doing that, imagining what people do, their lives, how they got here. He does that often when he’s travelling with groups. He likes to stare at their faces and imagine what kind of events had to unfold for them to end up on this trip with him. Is the couple sharing a dessert on their honeymoon trip? The family of four with the two children, are they taking their annual family trip? The adult that isn’t accompanied by anyone, are they taking a self-discovery trip? Yoongi sees them all and he wonders. He can’t help but wonder. All the stories he’s a part of. Though briefly, but he hopes that he’s still a happy memory in each of them. 

He thinks about that as he goes back to the car he’s rented for his stay in Hamburg. The car is a beauty, a nice convertible and Yoongi grins as he gets to it. He’s just finished a tour of two weeks with a group of people, mostly young adults but there was a sweet elderly couple too and he can’t help but smile as he gets into the passenger seat, thinking about them. While the top of the car is retracting so Yoongi can enjoy the glorious summer weather of Hamburg, he goes to pull the car into motion but a voice stops him. 

“Hey! Hey you tour guide!” Yoongi turns to his right and sees a familiar young man running towards the car , dragging a carry-on bag with him. “You! Tour guide! Wait!” The young man is still running towards him, towards the car and Yoongi’s fight or flight response gets activated really quickly. He’s not one to run from danger or people, especially not when they are as pretty as the young man coming towards him. As he runs closer, Yoongi sees his face better and he remembers him from the group he’s just taken around Europe but now, Yoongi wants to drive away even more. 

He loves his job, he really does. 

But he likes it better when people leave him alone once he’s off the clock. 

The young man gets to the car, finally, and Yoongi flinches when he hears the suitcase colliding with the car loudly. Oh god. He hopes there’s not a scratch or dent on it. 

“You..” The man is panting, leaning over the passenger door. The roof of the car is now completely off, and Yoongi has no problem seeing the man’s face. He tries to remember his name, but he can’t put his finger on it. He knows the man is also Korean, because he heard the man talk to his friend in korean. Was it Jihyun? Ji-hwan? No, that wasn’t it.. “You have to help me!” 

Yoongi frowns. “Do I?” He replies and that’s not even him being sassy, he’s genuinely asking. 

“I lost something.” The man breathes out, slowly gathering his breath. “On the tour. I lost something.” 

Yoongi sighs and taps on the steering wheel. “For any lost object inquiries, please take your motion forward to the agency.” He repeats the words he’s been taught to say and has said over the years of doing this job. Oh, if he had a penny for every time someone tried to blame him for something they’ve lost.. 

“What? Why would I- you’re here, you can help me!” The stranger says, displeased by Yoongi’s reaction. “You’re our guide, I lost something on the tour, so you have to help me find it!” 

Yoongi shakes his head immediately. “No, I was your guide. The tour has officially ended, and I am legally relieved of any responsibilities regarding you or your being. So, I am sorry, but I really can’t help.” Yoongi tells him honestly, and he really wishes he would remember the man’s name. It’s in his brain somewhere, but he really can’t put his finger on it.

“But.. But..” The man stutters, unable to find a reply. 

He looks so distressed that for a second, Yoongi really feels bad for not being able to help him. But this is really not his responsibility anymore. So with a sigh, he turns sideways, facing the young man a little. “Look, you look like a nice guy, and I am really sorry that you lost whatever it is you lost, but I really cannot help you. I really suggest you call the agency and contact your insurance just in case. But other than that, I am unable to help. Now if you will excuse me..” 

Yoongi gestures for him to step away from the car. He feels bad when he drives off, away from the sad and confused look the young man was giving him. But Yoongi knows himself. The longer he would have stayed, the more he would have been compelled to help him. And that, that can’t happen. 

It’s much later, and the sun has set over the city and Yoongi has just finished showering. With his slightly damp hair and his towel around his shoulders, he puts on his pajamas for bed. A simple oversized shirt and plaid loose pants. He still feels a little heavy from dinner, the currywürst he had was delicious, but maybe he went a little overboard by ordering two servings. But he loves it. That’s also something he loves about travelling so much, he gets to experience so much of each country, their culture, their customs, and he truly feels like this is where true intelligence resides. Forget about books and all, this, this is where it is. 

Besides, you’re only as clever as the next person, in Yoongi’s mind. 

His hotel room is big, definitely bigger than the ones he used to stay in when he first started it. It has a small living area, separated from the sleeping area by two sliding doors. The bathroom is big too, big enough for a bathtub and for him to have a room to fully lay on the tiled floor and extend his arms out freely ( don’t ask, he likes it. floors are nice). It’s definitely a bit extra, but it’s been a while since he’s had a proper holiday, and this is the beginning of two weeks with no plan, no itinerary to follow. Just Yoongi and his mind, and he likes to have a plan, but right now, he likes to know he doesn’t have one. He likes knowing that he could check out tomorrow morning and take the next plane anywhere. Or stay in Hamburg for the whole duration of two weeks and visit the city on his own. He doesn’t know, he doesn’t care. Sometimes not knowing is a relief.

He’s picking what book he’ll read tonight to lull him to sleep, when a series of knocks echo through his hotel room. Turning towards his door, Yoongi frowns. Then turns towards the digital clock by the TV and frowns. Who the hell would knock at his door at 9:30 pm? No one knows he’s here. No one in this city knows him after all. So. Who?

Maybe something is happening in the hotel and someone from the staff is here to let him know. He’s not properly dressed to really see someone right now but he supposes the hotel staff have probably seen worse than his old shirt and plaid pants. Making his way to the door, he pats his hair a little bit more with his towel before opening the door. 

He has his usual rehearsed german phrases ready but they all die in his throat when he sees the person on the other side. 

The same stranger from this morning is standing there, a determined look on his face, holding his phone out towards Yoongi the second he opens the door. 

“Your manager for you.” 

Yoongi frowns while eyeing the man’s phone. The screen is lit up, and when he focuses on the numbers displayed, he does recognize it. Still warily, he grabs the device and pulls it to his ear. 

“Hello?” 

“Yoongi-ah? It’s Seokjin!” The familiar voice of his boss and best friend rings to his ear and Yoongi is always happy to hear him so he can’t really help when a smile takes place on his face. 

“Hey hyung. Is everything okay?” Yoongi asks him. 

Seokjin laughs and Yoongi has known him for years now, so he knows all the kinds of laughs Seokjin has. And this is definitely a nervous laugh. “Ha Yoongi-ah! You’re at the hotel?” 

“Yes.. Hyung, what’s wrong?” Yoongi asks, not wanting to beat around the bush. “Why am I talking to you from a stranger’s phone?” 

“Well technically he’s not a stranger, he was with you on the tour.” Seokjin replies and Yoongi eyes the man at his door. Yoongi remembers him, of course he does, because he saw him only hours ago, and on the tour, but really, no matter how hard he tries, he can’t remember the boy’s name. “But that’s not what’s important, I guess.” 

“What is then?” 

“You have to help him.” 

The words are out of Seokjin’s mouth and even though he can’t see him, the words hit him like a brick in his face. Yoongi blinks a few times and he doesn’t fail to notice the smile the stranger starts showing. 

“What do you mean I have to help him?” Yoongi retorts, trying to not get irritated. Gosh, this is not how he imagined his evening to go. “The tour ended, hyung. It’s not my responsibility anymore.” 

Seokjin sighs on the other line. “Technically, the travellers aren’t your responsibility when they leave the country you’re in. And since Park Jimin-ssi is still here..” 

Ha! Jimin! That’s his name. Yoongi knew it was Jimin. 

But anyway, back to the main problem. 

“Wait. That’s.. That’s not..” Yoongi tries to find a reason to not do this. He can’t do this. He almost wants to whine and stomp his feet. This is his holiday. This is his break. “Hyung, I can’t do this.” 

“Yoon, please.” Seokjin sighs and Yoongi can hear the slight exhaustion in his hyung’s voice. “He threatened to sue us. So please, help him quickly, and I will get you days off right after your next tour okay?”

Yoongi turns to Park Jimin. The man is still quietly watching him, arms crossed over his chest, perfectly still. He looks young, short brown hair falling over his forehead, and his eyes are warm, kind. His straight nose looks.. very attractive and Yoongi tries to understand since when did he start thinking noses are attractive. His eyes fall to his lips, plump and full, and Yoongi decides that’s enough and he looks back up to Jimin’s eyes. Yoongi has a hard time thinking someone who looks this innocent could sue the agency for something as simple as a lost object. 

He sighs again and shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it, hyung. I will handle it. I will call you soon, alright?” 

“Okay. Take care, Yoongi-ah.” Seokjin says before hanging up. 

Yoongi hands the phone back to Jimin. He takes another good look at the young man, narrowing his eyes a little. Jimin just takes his phone back without a word, letting Yoongi stare at him openly. Yoongi has always been good at figuring people out, all these years of being around different people has made him an expert at finding out who people are from the first look. But Jimin. 

Hum. 

Crossing his arms over his chest, Yoongi speaks. “So? You’ve lost something, I hear.” 

And there’s something about the way Jimin smiles after Yoongi speaks, like he knew. Like he knew Yoongi would help him in the end. Like he knew he’d get his way. And with the way Park Jimin walks into Yoongi’s hotel room, waltzing in like he owns it, something tells Yoongi that Park Jimin always gets his way. 

Park Jimin. 

Park Jimin sits with his back straight and his hand on his knees as he watches Yoongi who’s standing near the table. Yoongi notices that he is not wearing the same clothes he saw the young man in  at the airport this morning. The clothes he’s wearing now are simple, an black button up shirt, with blue jeans and black loafers. A few rings adorned his fingers, short and a little bit on the chubby side, like baby hands and Yoongi finds them absolutely adorable but he quickly pushes that comment off to the side. He’s also sporting a couple of necklaces and Yoongi notices that he’s also wearing a few pairs of earrings. 

Hum. 

Okay. 

“So. You lost something.” Yoongi states. Jimin nods and gives a simple nod. “Do you have any idea where it is?” 

“Well, if I did, would I be here?” Jimin replies simply. There’s not even a taunt in his voice, he’s genuinely asking. 

Yoongi nods in understanding. “I guess you wouldn’t. What is it though? It must be valuable if you are this adamant on finding it.” 

Jimin nods, this time with a little bit of regret piercing through his eyes. “My engagement ring.” 

Oh. 

“Shit.” Yoongi lets out. He conjures all the memories of the trip he has and tries to see Jimin in them. He remembers Jimin being with another man, but Yoongi hadn’t really cared that much. For him, they were just another couple on another one of his tours. Nothing special. 

“He proposed on the trip.” Jimin explains. “He had planned this whole thing in Paris, a dinner by the Eiffel Tower and an evening walk by the Seine. He proposed to me after he put a lock on this bridge, I can’t remember the name of it..” 

“ Le Pont des Arts .” Yoongi tells him. But he doesn’t tell the young man that it’s now technically illegal to do so. 

“Yes, that one.” Jimin agrees, though he still looks unsure. 

Yoongi sighs. “That’s..”, cliché , “romantic.” He clears his throat. “You must be really happy.” 

Jimin nods. He looks reserved, shy, but then he shakes his head and sets a pair of determined eyes on Yoongi. “I need to find it. It’s his grandmother’s ring, I can’t show up back in Seoul not wearing it. They’ll crucify me.”  

Yoongi raises an eyebrow. “Sounds extreme.” He sighs. “But at least we know you had it in Paris, so that takes away Lisbon and Madrid to search.” Yoongi takes the seat on the cushion chair to face Jimin. “We had 3 days in Paris. Do you remember having it when we went to Bern?” 

The whole tour was to go through big European cities. The itinerary was composed of Lisbon, Madrid, Paris, Bern and Hamburg. Due to the new regulations for the UK, the tour hadn’t been approved to go there, as it would have required for the travelers to have a separate passport and visa, different from a simple european visa. Customs laws were very tricky and Yoongi remembers how he hated learning those in school, but now he understands why they’re so important. 

“I don’t think I did..” Jimin trails off, looking deep in thought. “ I remember not being able to wear it at first because it was too small for my finger.” 

Yoongi’s eyes drop to Jimin’s hands, which he has placed on his lap. They look definitely small, and Yoongi finds himself wondering what an engagement ring would look like on them. It would probably look a little out of place with the other rings Jimin has on. They look bigger, but still give off a delicate feeling. But maybe that’s just Jimin. 

“Hum.. I see. Do you have a picture of it?” Yoongi asks. “So we can show it to the places you’ve been to when we go looking.” 

When we go looking . There goes his no plan, no itinerary vacation. Up in smoke.

Jimin fishes his phone out of his pocket, and starts typing rapidly on it. Then, he extends his hand towards Yoongi. “There.” 

The picture shows Jimin and who Yoongi remembers being his friend - well, his fiancé, he supposes - standing by the Seine by the looks of it. The background clearly shows that the picture was taken at night, with the city lights reflected on the dark waters of the river. Jimin’s fiancé is grinning brightly at the camera as he takes the picture, while Jimin’s smile is a bit toned down but still there. Jimin is holding his hand up, showing the ring off. Yoongi has to admit, it’s a beautiful ring. The band is thin but the diamond on it is big and Yoongi can’t help but think it looks a bit weird, off-putting on Jimin’s finger. He can tell the ring is too small just by looking at the picture. Yoongi wonders if that’s the reason why Jimin doesn’t look as happy as his fiancé. 

But it’s not his place to ask. 

Nodding, he speaks up. “That’s a beautiful ring. He must be sad it got lost.” 

Jimin nods too. “He is. But he said that it’s okay if I don’t find it, but I.. I can’t go back without the ring.” 

Yoongi furrows his eyebrows. “ Why? Things get lost, it happens. It’s not your fault. ” 

Jimin shakes his head in disapproval. “But this is important. I need to find it.” 

Yoongi holds up his hands in defeat. “Alright, alright. If you want to look for it, we’ll look for it.” He sighs, he really tried all his methods to get out of this but Park Jimin is definitely a stubborn one.

“Thank you for helping me.” Jimin bows to him. 

“I am only doing it so that you don’t sue the agency. Seokjin hyung built it from the ground up, I can’t be the one who brings him a lawsuit. He would disown me.” 

Jimin chuckles at him. “You’re on his will?” 

“For all the money I am bringing him, I better be!” Yoongi jokes and the laugh that erupts from Park Jimin is one that Yoongi has never heard before. Which is normal since he doesn’t know the man, but what’s not normal is what it makes Yoongi feel. 

It stirs something inside him, as if something is awakening finally, at long last. It pulls a little around his heart, tugging at the heartstrings with something close to want, to longing. 

Park Jimin laughs and Yoongi wants. 

He wants to hear it forever. He wants to feel it against his chest. He wants to feel it on his lips. He wants to be the one drawing that laugh out of Jimin for all of eternity. 

What. 

Yoongi clears his throat and moves a little in his seat. No. He doesn’t need to be developing a somewhat crush on this stranger. Sure, Park Jimin is attractive, very handsome, possibly one of the most good looking men Yoongi has ever seen. But he’s also very much engaged. To another man. They’re here to find his engagement ring. Yes. That’s what he’s here to do. Otherwise Park Jimin will sue the agency. And Seokjin hyung will take Yoongi out of his will. 

Hum. 

That might be a little bit on the dramatic side, but Yoongi will blame it on the whole summer he spent in Spain. 

“Alright then. So we have to go through all the places we’ve been around Hamburg, and if we don’t find your ring then, we’ll see about going to Bern alright?” Yoongi says and Jimin, whose laughing has died down a little, nods. 

“I will pay for your ticket if we have to fly back to Bern.” The young man says, and Yoongi is surprised at this. “I understand this isn’t convenient for you, nor is it for me, so I am willing to cover all expenses.” 

Yoongi shakes his head. “You really don’t have to. I get discounts from hotels thanks to the agency so you really don’t have to worry about expenses.” 

“But I really insist.” Jimin pushes. “I can afford it, it’s no problem for me.” 

Yoongi can see that the younger will not let this go, so he does what he dislikes the most. Compromise. “Alright, let’s make a deal then. Let’s split the costs. You can pay for the plane tickets and transportation fares and I pay for the hotels? How does that sound?” 

Pulling his lips in a small pout, Jimin seems to ponder over the idea. Then shortly after, he sighs. “Alright. I’ll take that.” 

Yoongi nods in agreement, then a thought occurs to him. “Wait, where are you staying?” 

Jimin shrugs. “Another hotel down the street.” Yoongi thinks about all the hotels he knows in this area. There are only two others and each of them charge at least 150 euros per night. the one Yoongi is currently staying in already charges 100 euros per night, without his discount fees. Huh. Okay. Maybe Park Jimin really can afford it. 

Maybe Yoongi really should let him pay for everything and let himself be treated like a prince actually. 

But that’s not him. 

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow then?” 

Jimin nods and stands up and Yoongi does too. He leads Jimin back to the door, but the younger stops in the doorway. He has one foot out of the hotel room and one still inside, and he sends a worried look to Yoongi. “You’re not playing me right? You’re not going to run away in the middle of the night and leave me alone in this city here?” 

Yoongi feels bad that Jimin thinks that low of him, but then again, they don’t know each other that much. Yoongi has learned more about Jimin in a thirty minutes conversation than he has in two weeks being his tour guide. So he chooses to not take it personally and just shakes his head. “No, don’t worry. If this was a bad movie, maybe I would do so in order to create drama and drag out the plot, but I am not a character in a movie so,” he shrugs, “ you’re stuck with me.” 

Jimin chuckles at Yoongi’s words, eyes wrinkling into half moons and lips open wide and cheeks puffing out and Yoongi thinks wow . 

Jimin clears his throat, shaking his head. “You’re funny.” 

“You’re hot.” 

The words leave Yoongi before he can even think of them and he shuts his eyes in disbelief. Did he really just say that out loud? 

Jimin raises a questioning eyebrow towards him, probably startled by Yoongi’s blunt words. “Please let’s pretend I didn’t say that.” He quickly mumbles. 

Jimin smiles. “It’s alright, don’t worry about it.” 

“Still, I am very sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. You’re engaged and-”

“So are people going to stop thinking I am handsome now that I am engaged?” Jimin fakes a frustrated groan. “Shit I really should have said no.” 

Hum. 

Okay..? 

Yoongi feels like that conversation isn’t meant to be had with him, so he just clears his throat and just pulls the door closer to himself. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Jimin-ssi.” 

Jimin nods. “See you in the morning, Yoongi-ssi. I’ll be here at 8 am.” 

“8 am?” Yoongi repeats. When Jimin frowns at him, Yoongi realizes that the young man is on the hunt for something important and that every minute counts. “Yes, 8 am, alright, see you then.” 

Jimin gives him a bow and Yoongi waits till he hears the elevator sliding shut to close the door. Only then does he close the door and lets out a loud frustrated groan. 

Who on earth wakes up at 8 am willingly? 

Who even meets up at 8 am? Well, Jimin and him apparently. 

Ugh, Yoongi turns towards the digital clock and sighs when he sees that it’s already 10:15 pm. With all the jetlag and different time zones that he’s been on, his sleeping schedule has taken a large hit. But well. 

8 am wake-up call it is. 

The next morning, when Yoongi gets downstairs to go to the lobby and hopefully grab something to eat before Jimin arrives, he’s surprised to find the young man already seated at a table, reading a newspaper with a cup of coffee and half of a franzbrötchen . Yoongi checks his watch to make sure he’s not late. 7:45 am. 

He walks towards Park Jimin, who notices him quickly enough. A bright smile takes place on his lips when he does, and Yoongi almost feels blinded. “Oh good morning, Yoongi-sii!” 

Of course, Park Jimin would be the kind that’s enthusiastic in the morning. 

Yoongi bows in greeting and gestures to the seat opposite Jimin. “May I sit?” 

Jimin nods cheerfully. He looks happier than last night for sure, his face looking more glowy, though that could be make up. But his eyes definitely shine more though, brighter somehow. It’s definitely a sight in the morning and Yoongi almost feels like he could get through the morning thanks to this. 

“Do you want anything?” Jimin asks as Yoongi is sitting down. “Breakfast is on me.” 

Yoongi shakes his head. “Don’t worry, I can afford an espresso.” 

He raises his hand and soon enough, a waitress comes, pen and small notebook in hand. He quickly orders a cup of coffee and the waitress leaves to go and prepare it. Jimin watches him with curious eyes, which makes Yoongi furrows his brows. “What is it?”

“How do you speak so many languages so well?” Jimin asks. “Do you never get confused?” 

Yoongi shrugs in thought. “Not really. At first I did, when I was still learning. Languages like spanish or french are similar, even english in a way. The grammatical structures are similar too in a way, though there are a few differences and subtilities in the details. German is easy, the structure is close to Hangeul, so it somehow made it easier when I had to learn it.”

“Did you learn all of them in school?” 

The waitress comes back, holding Yoongi’s cup of coffee. “ Hier für dich .” 

“Danke schön .” Yoongi thanks her and she gives him a small nod and a smile before running off to another table. Stirring his cup, he answers Jimin’s question. “Not all of them. English and Chinese, I was taught in secondary school. Though, I only learned french when I was in university.” 

“So you learned spanish and german on your own?” Jimin’s eyes widen. 

Yoongi nods, while bringing his cup closer to his lips. “It was tough, but in the end, it’s just a language. It’s useful to me so, it’s not as excruciating as sitting in a classroom and listening to someone else.” 

“You prefer learning on your own?” Jimin asks,as he slowly tears a piece of his german pastry and brings it to his lips. Yoongi’s eyes follow the movement carefully, watching how delicate and perfectly placed Jimin’s moves are. As if he’s putting on a show for someone, as if he’s being watched. 

“I do.” He answers, still studying the man in front of him. “It’s better for my learning process. I can set my own pace that way.” 

Jimin hums in thought. “I wish I had that kind of brain.” 

Yoongi wants to say that anyone could learn but then he thinks about disabled people or even people with ADHD and well. Sometimes you can’t just learn something. 

“You don’t have to. I am sure whatever you do is already good for you, and that’s what you’re good at.” Yoongi tries to reassure him before finishing the rest of his coffee. Clearing his throat, he decides to divert the subject. They have a mission after all. “So. Engagement ring.” 

Jimin sighs but nods. “Yes. I made a list of all the places we’ve been to with my fiancé here in Hamburg, so we could start there.” 

Yoongi agrees with a short nod. “That sounds like a plan.” He thinks about the word Jimin used. Fiancé. Fiancé . It’s one of those words you never really get used to, no matter how many times you say it or hear it. It’s a french word, derived from confiance , trust, which entails faith, loyalty. It’s a simple word, light when it rolls off your tongue, but the baggage it holds is heavy. Yoongi wouldn’t know however, he’s never had anyone he’s liked enough or that much to want to be tied to them. He wonders how it feels, to want to be with someone so much that you want to announce it to the world by putting a visible sign on you. 

He keeps those thoughts to himself though, and lets Jimin finish his breakfast and then the two are on their way. 

“This is where he took you for your last meal in the city?” Yoongi asks and he physically has to stop his voice from sounding a little snobby but, seriously? For a second, Yoongi tries to remember Jimin’s fiancé and how he had seemed during the trip, but all he remembers is the man complaining about how much they were walking. Huh. It fits him, Yoongi thinks when he steps into the restaurant. 

The restaurant has an old art déco aesthetic to it, with a damier style floor, and vibrant dark blue walls. A few mirrors adorned the walls, too many in Yoongi’s opinion since everywhere he turns he can catch his reflection. Even the biggest narcissist doesn’t want to see themselves that much. 

Jimin starts to look around. It’s very early, and only a couple of people are here, most of them having breakfast. Jimin spots a waiter and walks up to him, Yoongi in tail. He clears his throat, catching the waiter’s attention. The waiter looks young, or at least a little younger than Yoongi. Taller than him though, and with what appears to be a nice crown of natural blonde hair on his head, the young man looks at Jimin then Yoongi and smiles at them. 

“Hi, do you speak english?” Jimin asks immediately, and Yoongi feels a little sad, because Yoongi speaks german and could explain the situation to the waiter, but Jimin seems determined to do this on his own at first. 

The waiter nods. “Yes, I do sir. How may I help you?” 

“I came here two nights ago with my fiancé, and I seem to have lost my engagement ring.” Jimin explains. “ Has anyone come forward saying they found a ring?” 

The waiter’s eyes travel between Jimin and Yoongi a few times, but then he purses his lips, looking a little defeated. “I am afraid no one has found a ring sir. I am very sorry.” 

Jimin sighs, and he already looks defeated. Yoongi feels for him, this is already a stressful time, being in a foreign country, without knowing the language, and now this.. He steps forward a little. “ Hallo, ich bin sein Freund, können wir die Restaurant durchsuchen ?” 

“Oh!” The waiter exclaims. “ Sprichst du Deutsch, Herr ?” 

“ Ja, ein Bisschen .” 

“ Verstehe ich. Ihr freund und Sie können die Restaurant durchsuchen, naturlich .” The waiter says. 

Yoongi thanks him and he leads Jimin towards the vast room. They move to an empty side, and when Yoongi turns to Jimin, he finds the younger staring at him with an impressed look. “What?” 

“Nothing, just..” Jimin shakes his head, but Yoongi does see a little flush on his cheeks.He says nothing as Jimin clears his throat. “What did you say to him?” 

“I asked him if we could look around. “ Yoongi says, nodding vaguely at the restaurant. “Do you remember where you were seated?” 

Jimin looks around the vast space but he seems to be struggling a little. “I.. It was at night, and it was different..” 

“Must not have been a memorable dinner.” Yoongi mutters, but the look Jimin sends him lets him know that the younger heard him. “Sorry,” he apologizes before continuing, “maybe the bathroom?” 

“I don’t think so.. Wait, it was that table!” Jimin exclaims while pointing at a table placed in a corner booth. It’s morning night, but Yoongi can tell how different it’ll look at night. With the dim-lights and ambience music playing, the setting could definitely be more romantic. 

Jimin approaches the table and since it’s unoccupied, slides into the booth seat. “I was seated there and,” looking up at Yoongi who’s watching him, he asks, “can you sit next to me?” 

Yoongi frowns, wondering how this is going to help but he does so anyway. He glides into the booth next to Jimin, but he keeps a safe distance with the younger. Jimin is moving around weirdly, probably putting his memory into full action, trying to remember. 

“I was there, it’s our last night. He’s just ordered this fancy dessert. It was a chocolate bomb, and there was a jazz song playing.” Jimin whispers and then suddenly, he grabs Yoongi’s hand and intertwines their fingers together. 

Yoongi freezes when Jimin does so, feeling his heart racing in his chest. Jimin is holding his hand. 

Someone is holding his hand. 

“He said he couldn’t wait to marry me.” Jimin continues remembering. “He said he couldn’t believe he got someone like me.” 

Yoongi hasn’t had his hand held in a very long time. And when he tries to remember when was the last time, he can’t remember at all. Has it been this long? Has his hand ever being held in the first place? Or has he spent the last twenty seven years without knowing what it feels like to be touched so simply? 

“The dessert arrived and we ate it. I remember looking down and.;”

Has he never been loved to the point where someone wanted to hold his hand?

“I didn’t lose it here.” Jimin speaks up a little louder. 

Yoongi’s train of thought abruptly ends and he turns to Jimin. “You didn’t?” 

“No. I didn’t have it here. I didn’t have it here when I walked in.” Jimin says. His grip around Yoongi’s hand lessens a little and Yoongi feels like a leaf slowly being lifted off the ground by the wind. As if all he’s known somehow came tumbling down like a castle of card. 

Jimin sighs next to him, and he leans back against the cushioned wall. “I am never going to find it, aren’t I?” 

Yoongi mirrors him, leaning back too. His hand falls away from Jimin’s, and Yoongi tells himself it’s easier to let go first than feel himself drifting further. 

“Yes, you will.” Yoongi reassures him. “We’ve only been to one place. We still have a few places to go to in the city. Maybe it’s there.”

Jimin hums, but his eyes are focused on a part of the ceiling. Yoongi looks at him, studying his face. It’s strange to him how somehow can have such detailed and sharp features, but look incredibly soft. Jimin’s cheeks seem soft and full and Yoongi wants nothing more than to reach out and touch the skin there. 

But no, he’s already embarrassed himself enough last night. He doesn’t need to dig deeper for his grave. 

“Hey let’s get out of here. I know a place you’ll like.” 

Jimin turns to him, and Yoongi wishes he hadn’t. This way, their faces only sit a few inches away, close enough for Yoongi to spot the little freckles on the apple of Jimin’s cheeks. It plays well with the warmth in his eyes, makes him look young, and lively. 

“How do you know what I’d like?” Jimin asks, voice small and soft, it feels like the sun playing on his skin. 

“I know you’ll like this.” Yoongi answers, just as softly. He wouldn’t qualify himself as soft, but somehow right now he is. 

“What kind of place is it?” 

Yoongi quickly glances around to make sure no one is listening, but then he realizes that no one might understand him anyway. He looks back at Jimin, who’s still looking at him, eyes incredibly gentle, and Yoongi finds himself a little lost as to why, as to when. The questions are the ones he’s asked himself a few times in his life, mostly when he sees other couples being happy. 

Why would you put yourself through something that might end? 

When will he have that? 

“So?” Jimin asks and Yoongi is brought back to where they are. 

Yoongi sighs. “Let’s go, it’s not that far. They have food that’s actually good.” 

Jimin chuckles. “The food here  is good too.” 

Yoongi clicks his tongue. “No, come on, I’ll show you real german delicacies!” 

Jimin moans when he has his first bite. “Okay, you’re right.” He says, chewing slowly. There’s a bit of käse sauce dripping from his lips, making them even shinier. “This is so much better than what I had at the restaurant, and I don’t even like seafood!”

“And much simpler and cheaper too.” Yoongi nods, before having a bite of his own Fishbrötchen . They’re lucky today is market day, endless market stands and sellers are located by the Elbe River. It’s a good day to be outside by the harbour, the seagulls are happily flying and creating large flocks near the docks and sometimes even on the water. 

“Why did you never take us here?” Jimin asks, and when Yoongi turns to him, he notices that the younger has already eaten half of his fish sandwich. 

“I have to follow a specific itinerary on the tours. Most of the places I take people to have partnerships with the agency. If we don’t have one, then I can’t really take you there.” Yoongi explains, while taking out a large fish bone that somehow got away. “And most of the people on the tours don’t like to be taken here as an activity and I wouldn’t like it either. It took me a whole day to discover the fish market when I first came here.” 

Jimin is listening to him intently as he speaks, still munching on his Fishbrötchen . “How old were you?” 

Yoongi takes a few seconds to properly remember. “I first went to Berlin when I was 19 as my first exchange programme during summer, but I only came to Hamburg when I was 21.” 

“I’ve always wanted to go to Berlin.” Jimin whispers. 

“You can.” 

Jimin hums in thought, but something seems to trouble him. A little line appears on his forehead, and Yoongi can’t help but think it doesn’t fit there at all. 

“Wanna have some more food?” Yoongi asks, trying to find a way to make the frown go away. 

Jimin turns to him and narrows his eyes thoughtfully. “What kind of food are we talking about?” 

“Since you don’t like seafood, I’ll take you to have some of the best Currywürste you’ve ever had. And maybe even some Grünkohl if we’re lucky.” 

Jimin chuckles and Yoongi thinks this looks better on him, cheeks full from his grin and frown gone. Yoongi looks at him openly and can’t help but think that this is how he should always look. A little giddy, a little cheerful, and very happy. Jimin’s laugh dies down as Yoongi keeps staring but the smile stays on. 

“Why are you looking me?” Jimin asks. His fingers go to his mouth, touching the corners and Yoongi wonders if he were to lean in and kiss Jimin, would he taste like sea air or like the ray of sun hitting his skin? “Do I have something on me?” 

Yoongi shakes his head, and looks away. “No, no, you’re good.” He clears his throat and lightly dusts his hands on his pants. “We should get going if we want to go and check other places for your ring.” 

The smile on Jimin’s lips falls immediately at the sound of this, but he nods in agreement. “Yeah, I suppose we have to go don’t we.” 

Yoongi nods and the two of them finish their fish sandwich, staring at the harbour, wondering if time could stand still even for one more minute. 

“We should try the Chocolate Museum.” Jimin says once their bellies are full with food from the market. The morning has gone by quickly as they walked through the market and tasted many foods. “I remember washing my hands there after making our chocolate bars. Maybe I lost it there.” 

“ Chocoversum ,” Yoongi nods. He looks around and quickly makes notes of where they are, and what’s the quickest way to get there. “Okay, we could walk there and be there in about twenty minutes. Or we can take the bus if you’re feeling tired.” 

Jimin shakes his head. “I am not, let’s walk.” 

Yoongi starts leading them and Jimin sticks by his side, as they navigate the streets. They stay quiet for a few minutes before Jimin speaks up. “How do you not get lost?” 

Yoongi chuckles, because he had been wondering if Jimin would notice. “I’ve been there before.” 

“To the museum?” Jimin keeps questioning him. “It must have been recently, because things change all the time, you can’t tell me you’re going to remember the itinerary to go somewhere from a year ago or something.” Yoongi turns to Jimin with a playful smirk, and Jimin’s eyes widen. “Wait, you do?” 

Yoongi laughs and shakes his head. “God, I wish, but unfortunately, I don’t have eidetic memory. But for every tour I do, I always travel there in advance, getting to know the city intimately so I can at least sound like I know what I am talking about.”

“Is that why you never use maps or a GPS when you’re showing us the city?” Yoongi raises a curious eyebrow at Jimin. “I noticed that you didn’t use those on the tour. You were showing us Paris without a map and talking about the places as if you were a native.” 

Yoongi glances away, a little shy and embarrassed. He’s not used to people noticing these things about him. After all, this is his job and it’s nothing special really, but somehow, having Jimin noticing makes him feel a little giddy inside for some reason. 

“You just get used to it after doing the same tours for a while. But the cities change so I try to come on my own free time, to see what changed, what didn’t.” 

Jimin doesn’t answer right away, but Yoongi knows the young man has heard him. “That sounds quite a lonely affair.” Jimin says after a while.

Yoongi shrugs, hoping to shake off some of the heavy burden of that truth. “You get used to it.” 

Jimin doesn’t reply and they walk along a few streets before Yoongi turns to Jimin. “Wait. I don’t know what you do.” 

Jimin looks surprised that Yoongi is asking him this, but he answers nonetheless. “Me? I am a choreographer.” Then, he adds with a smug grin. “Quite well known back in the homeland if I say so myself.” 

“Oh? That’s great!” Yoongi exclaims, quite surprised that someone like Jimin would be in a field that’s so creative and demanding. Yoongi remembers that on the tour, Jimin was very patient and cheerful whenever they visited a landmark, so he has a hard time imagining the younger leading other people and being commanding. “Do you like it?” 

“Oh I love it.” Jimin nods enthusiastically and there’s a little flush on his cheeks when Yoongi turns to him, and he has to remind himself to keep walking, to keep breathing because Jimin’s eyes are shining and his skin is glowing and it’s a little like watching the sunset rise for the first time. 

Something else too. 

Something he can’t name yet. 

“I started by dancing for the corps de ballet in Seoul, but then I moved to choreographing pieces here and there for my friend, Hoseok who’s also a dancer. I still dance in the corps, but I am thinking of doing choreography full time now.” 

“That’s amazing, Jimin-ah.” Yoongi says, then frowns. “Wait, Can I call you that, right?” He adds. He hadn’t really stopped thinking about formalities with Jimin, but now he thinks he should have asked when they had first started this. Whatever this is. 

“Of course.” Jimin nods. “If we’re going to be around each other for who knows how long, we can be a little less formal, I think. You’re older than me, right?” 

“I am twenty seven. And you?” Yoongi questions, blatantly aware that he’s been thinking of Jimin as younger than him, but they could be the same age. 

“I am twenty five.” Jimin answers. “So.. hyung?” 

Yoongi nods, feeling a little weird. He hasn’t had anyone calling him hyung in a while, being away from South Korea in a while, and even then, Yoongi doesn’t have younger siblings. He’s the dongsaeng in his family, so no one has really called him hyung that much. Only younger school friends but he hasn’t talked to them in a while. Hearing it makes him miss it somehow, it’s not even something he’s familiar with, but hearing Jimin say the word makes him miss it, makes him miss home just a bit more. 

“Yoongi hyung?” Jimin calls him, and Yoongi comes back to reality and he realizes that they’ve stopped walking, they’re standing in the middle of the street now, with Jimin looking at him with concerned eyes. And Yoongi hadn’t known before, that having a stranger looking at him with so much care, so much worry, would have him feel.. like this. 

Slowly he shakes his head and clears his throat. “Sorry, it’s just..” It takes him a moment to decide if he can actually open up to Jimin like this. Jimin is a stranger, Yoongi doesn’t know him that much. Why would he give his secrets to a stranger? “It’s nothing.” He says to end it, before he looks around at their surroundings. “Come now, we’re only about five minutes away.” 

He starts walking again, and with Jimin behind him, they leave the unsaid secrets at the corners of the german street and never look back. 

The lady at the front desk of the Chocoversum looks saddened when she tells them that no ring has been found in the museum by either the staff or the cleaning team. “I am very sorry, sir, but no one has come forward with a ring.” 

And when they reach the Kunsthalle, they don’t have any luck either as the man at the front desk tells them the same. Yoongi thanks them while Jimin is already turning around to leave. Yoongi has to jog a little to catch up with the younger. “Jimin-ah, wait!” 

Jimin is already by the side of the street when Yoongi gets to him. With a light hand, he grabs Jimin’s shoulder to halt him. “Hey, wait, Jimin-ah-”

When Jimin turns around, shrugging off Yoongi’s hand, the younger’s eyes are clouded with frustration. Yoongi doesn’t know him that well, but he feels bad for him. He can see how Jimin really wants to find this ring, and Yoongi is starting to understand that this is more serious than he had thought at first. “Hey, we’ll go look somewhere else, okay? We’ll find it, we’ll find your ring.” 

Jimin shakes his head. “No, no it’s probably lost and gone down the drain or in a trash bin somewhere!” Jimin’s voice trembles as he speaks and Yoongi sees how the younger’s body is shaking. He looks on the verge of tears and Yoongi can’t remember the last time he’s comforted anyone. “I am never going to find it. This is all my fault.” 

Yoongi sees the tears before they even fall, and he can’t help when he catches them with his hands, his fingers lightly brushing them away. Jimin lets him and scoots closer until he has his head leaning on Yoongi’s shoulder. Yoongi is a little stunned at the gesture. Glancing around at the street they’re on, he notices a few people looking at them but most of the walkers by are just continuing on their way. They shouldn’t be doing this in the middle of the street, not when Yoongi knows that some people aren’t as accepting as others. 

“Jimin-ah..” Yoongi tries, putting a hand on Jimin’s back. He hears a small sob and his heart breaks in his chest.

“Why can’t I do anything right..” Jimin whispers against him. “I really ruined everything.” 

Yoongi purses his lips, and really he doesn’t know what to say, he’s never been in a situation like this. But he can’t let Jimin put himself down. “Hey come on, let’s go. I’ll take you to your hotel.” 

Jimin doesn’t reply, nor moves and Yoongi doesn’t want to force him, but he doesn’t know Jimin, he doesn’t know what he needs at times like these. Jimin stays there, nestled against him, and Yoongi can’t remember the last time someone has come to him for comfort, or the last time he himself had needed comfort. He always made sure to stay away from anything that would cause drama or conflict in his life. It’s always been his guideline in life, so he doesn’t know. 

But still, he gently wraps his arms around Jimin’s back, one hand rubbing up and down and hopes it’s enough. 

They end up taking the bus to go back to Jimin’s hotel. There are no empty seats  so they stand, holding themselves to a metal rail attached to the roof. Standing face to face, they stay silent for most of the bus ride, but halfway through, Jimin looks up at Yoongi. His eyes are still a little glossy and a little red, and they’re starting to get puffy, and yet. Yoongi can’t find another word to describe him other than beautiful. 

“I am sorry I cried.” Jimin says, his voice sounding a little hoarse. His eyes fall on Yoongi’s shoulder. “I even stained your shirt.” 

Yoongi looks down at said shirt and he can barely notice the little wet patch Jimin left. It’s not big by any mean, and he’s certain that in an hour, nothing will be visible anymore. It almost makes him sad, the thought of any evidence that Jimin left on him will fade away with time. He shrugs away the feeling and looks back at Jimin. “It’s alright, it’s just a shirt. Also, don’t apologize for crying, you’re allowed to cry if you feel frustrated.” 

Jimin sighs. “I overreacted though.” 

“Did you though?” Yoongi tilts his head to the side, eyes set on Jimin. “You felt strongly about something and your reaction came in the form of tears. If a baby is crying because he’s hungry, you wouldn’t tell him to stop, wouldn’t you?”

“So you’re saying I acted like a baby?” Jimin retorts. 

Yoongi shakes his head. “Not at all. I just think you need to be kinder to yourself about what you feel. Feeling things is okay, and reacting to them, no matter how it comes out, is okay too.” 

Jimi stares at him intently for a few minutes before he smiles. “Gosh, I wish I had someone like you in my life when I was growing up.” 

Yoongi smiles. “No, you wouldn’t have wanted me in your life that early.” 

Jimin frowns, a curious smile on. “Why?” 

Yoongi smirks. “Because you would have fallen in love with me.” 

Jimin rolls his eyes but the smile lingers on his lips. “Wow. Is that you flirting? Does that work? Does that get you laid?” 

Yoongi laughs and shakes his head. “I wouldn’t do that if I wanted to get laid, trust me.” 

“Oh yeah? What would you say then? Jimin teases, a mocking smile on.  

“I wouldn’t say anything.” Yoongi shrugs. “My eyes would do the work for me.” 

Jimin scoffs and shakes his head, but then he turns towards Yoongi and looks at him carefully. “You do have pretty eyes.” 

Yoongi raises an eyebrow. “See. You’re already falling for me.” 

Jimin shakes his head, looking a little amused and a little embarrassed, the smile on his face betraying his amusement. “I am engaged, may I remind you.” 

Yoongi sighs dramatically. “A reminder I could’ve been spared from, but alright.” 

A silence falls over them again, and they step out of the bus after some time. The hotel being near to the bus stop, they walk only for five minutes before Jimin turns to him. “Thank you.” 

Eyebrows furrowed, Yoongi purses his lips. “What for?” 

“Earlier, in the bus.” Jimin replies simply. “I know you were trying to distract me and cheer me up.” 

“That obvious, huh?” Yoongi says, looking down at his feet. 

“It’s alright. It worked so.. thank you.” Jimin says. 

It’s a simple thing, but when Yoongi looks up and sees Jimin smiling at him with his pretty eyes and his pretty face in his pretty clothes, Yoongi feels .. weird. And maybe Yoongi is being a little weird but this whole situation is a little weird. He can’t remember the last time he’s spent this much time with someone outside of work. Willingly. On purpose. 

“Yeah?” He feels dazed, a little warm in the face and all his insides really. It’s almost like he’s a school girl and he’s talking to his crush for the first time. He shouldn’t be feeling like this, he shouldn’t be thinking about how pretty Jimin is or how Jimin’s eyes are gorgeous in the late afternoon light and-

Jimin nods then sighs. “We didn’t find anything. So.. guess we’re going to have to go to Bern?” 

Yoongi purses his lips. “Guess we do. I’ll start looking for flights tonight and see if we can get an early one for mid-day.” 

Jimin nods. “I am really sorry for dragging you into this.” He steps forward a little, and Yoongi has barely the time to process everything as everything happens too fast and suddenly his brain is not working properly anymore. 

Jimin grabs his hand. Soft fingers grabbing his. Yoongi’s heartbeat speeding in his chest. Jimin’s fragrance engulfing him whole. The gentle squeeze of Jimin’s fingers. The air leaving Yoongi’s lungs.

“Thank you, Yoongi hyung.” Another squeeze. “Really.” 

Yoongi gives a small nod, all he can manage, and Jimin offers him one last smile before he turns around and enters the hotel, leaving Yoongi with a racing heart and a troubled brain and his stomach tied in knots in a foreign german street. 

When Yoongi gets to his own hotel room, he feels exhausted and run down like he’s been walking for days and is only stopping now. When his body hits his bed, he feels like a stone being thrown into the deep dark ends of a lake with no clear way on how to get back to the surface. He doesn’t know how long he spends staring at the ceiling, how long till his vision gets blurry and he can barely see anything anymore, can barely feel anything anymore. Just the weight of him, falling, dropping, sinking.  

But the ghost of Jimin’s hand on his remains. 

Raising his hand to stare at it, it’s obvious that it’s just a hand. A normal hand, the same hand Yoongi’s had for the twenty seven years he has been in this world. A simple hand. His hand. But only thirty minutes ago, his hand was being held and pressed gently by soft fingers belonging to the most beautiful man Yoongi has ever seen. He can still feel them, feel Jimin’s small fingers wrapped around his, their gentleness. 

Yoongi frowns. 

He has held hands before. He thinks so, at least. He remembers his mother holding his hand as she walked him to school when he was younger. Then, Yoongi’s first crush in primary school. A sweet girl who was walking the same path as he did to go home. He tries to remember her face, but all he sees are blurry features and dark brown hair. After that, he can’t really remember anything. He tries to think of the few people he’s dated, and no matter how hard he tries, he can’t remember their faces clearly. 

The only face he sees is Jimin. 

Jimin and his kind eyes, and his full cheeks and his shiny hair, and his soft looking lips. 

Yoongi closes his eyes, wanting the image of Jimin to go away but all it does is enhance it. With his eyes closed, it’s like Jimin is right in front of him, right there for him to see. But as soon as he opens his eyes again, the image is gone. Though the feeling of Jimin’s hand over his is still there. 

With a loud groan, Yoongi blindly grabs a large pillow and covers his whole face with it. He lets out a muffled yell, trapped into the cushion but he does feel slightly lighter. One question keeps him feeling heavy however : if he feels like this after one day spent with Jimin, how will he spend the next few days with the younger? 

They really need to find this ring faster.

When he meets Jimin the next morning, it’s 9 am and he’s trying to call this hotel he knows he likes in Bern. He’s at the hotel lobby, having already had his breakfast, and he’s facing the entrance of the lobby and that’s why he’s able to see Jimin when he walks in. The younger man is quite stylish today. Wearing a red cardigan over an all black outfit, he walks in, a cross-body bag outlining the shape of his chest nicely. He’s almost strutting as he makes his way over towards Yoongi and when Jimin raises the sunglasses he’s wearing to place them on the top of his head, Yoongi thinks he sees a waiter stops in their tracks as they take the man in. Yoongi doesn’t blame them. If Jimin wasn’t directly walking up to him, Yoongi would be staring with his mouth wide open and some drool would probably come out.  

It’s embarrassing, really. 

But well. No one has to know. 

Jimin doesn’t notice any of this, only smiles big as he takes the seat in front of Yoongi. “Morning!” He greets Yoongi enthusiastically. 

“Morning.” Yoongi says, looking up from his phone. “You look happy.” 

“I am.” Jimin says, a proud smile on his face. “I think I know where I lost it.” 

“Oh?” Yoongi locks his phone so he can focus on Jimin. “Please, pray tell.”

“We went to the Kunstmuseum right? I went through our pictures last night, and there’s a picture of me with the ring so I had it there. I probably lost it when I washed my hands before we left. I think that’s where we should go next!” 

Yoongi nods. “Alright, I have been trying to call this hotel I usually stay at in order to book a room, so I can ask for the both of us.” 

Jimin is beaming as he nods enthusiastically to Yoongi. He stays quiet while Yoongi manages to get them both a room. Once he hangs up, he starts typing on his phone looking for flights. “There’s a flight this afternoon at 4pm so we could be in Bern for dinner.” 

Jimin claps his hand in visible excitement. Yongi is glad to see him this way, his first thought this morning as he woke up had been for the younger, wondering if he was okay after the disappointment of yesterday. “Amazing! I can’t wait to have some fondue! Oh, can we go by that restaurant by the beautiful town house and have that saffron dish?”

“Saffron risotto?” Yoongi raises an eyebrow. 

“Yes! And those cheese balls? What were they called again?” 

“ Malakoff .” Yoongi replies, chuckling slightly. “I’ve never seen someone so excited about them.” 

“I have actually never tried them.” Jimin sighs. “But I really want to!” 

“Why didn’t you try them back when we were there?” Yoongi asks as he tries to remember if they weren’t on the menu of one of the restaurants he took the group to. He always makes sure to take his groups to restaurant which serves local cuisine to give them the best experience possible. 

Jmin clicks his tongue. “It’s a long story. I’d rather plan what we’re going to do before our flight.” 

Yoongi feels like there’s a long story behind that, but not wanting to make the younger feel uncomfortable, he doesn’t push it and instead chooses to follow his lead. “What do you want to do?” 

Jimin gives him a devilish grin and Yoongi has a feeling he’s not going to enjoy what comes next. 

“This is so great!” 

Jimin is grinning from ear to ear, cheeks flushed. His hands are gripping the rail on the prow, body relaxed and hair flowing with the wind. He turns back to Yoongi, who’s positively not liking this. At all. 

“Are you alright?” Jimin asks after staring at him for a few more seconds. “You look pale.” 

“I am fine.” Yoongi manages, but he has to force himself to blurt out the words.

Jimin leaves the rail and walks over to where Yoongi is sitting. It’s a nice little area on the prow of the boat, with iron benches and the view is nice enough that Yoongi could almost forget that he’s on a boat and that he doesn’t like water that much. 

“Are you scared?” Jimin asks, sitting next to him. He’s close, not too close to be inappropriate but definitely closer than a semi-stranger should be. 

“No.” He shakes his head. “I just don’t like being on water that much.” 

“Oh..” Jimin says, leaning on the back of the bench next to him. “You could have said no. I wouldn’t have minded.” 

Yoongi turns to him, eyebrows furrowed and confusion written on his face. Jimin doesn’t look back, just stares straight ahead and Yoongi takes that time to indulge in a little staring of his own. He shouldn’t, not like this, not this close, but he can’t help it. With those pretty eyes and delicate skin and small nose and plump lips, Jimin looks like a painting. The kind of painting you have to stop and look at for a few minutes, the kind you have to try and take in every detail otherwise you’ll die. Or something close. That’s how Yoongi feels anyway ; if he looks away from Jimin for even one second, he might die. 

Or worse. Jimin might disappear. 

“Who could ever say no to you.” Yoongi whispers, a simple thought but it prompts Jimin to look at him. Soft eyes, warm brown. Yoongi is enticed. 

Jimin offers him a sad smile. “You’re too kind.” With a sigh, he turns back to the sea while Yoongi keeps looking at him. 

Jimin is probably right. He’s too kind, too soft, he’s been alone for too long and it’s probably why he’s so affected by the young man in front of him. It has to be. This.. crush, this small infatuation he’s feeling can only be due to the fact that he hasn’t been with anyone for years and he’s lonely. That’s all. That’s really just all there is. Nothing more. Nothing less. 

“Water calms me.” Jimin says after some time. The boat is travelling along the Elbe river, at a steady speed. The city is moving as they go, and Yoongi wonders how the two of them would look from another point of view. What do the people on the bridges think of them? Do they see two strangers? Do they see a couple? “It’s so peaceful, don’t you think? All this water. It’s so big compared to us. We’re nothing. This multitude of drops, coming together, to form something so grand and vast and deep and unknown. It’s wonderful.” 

“It’s a little bit like love too. You have this feeling, that unknown feeling lurking around the corner like a wave, ready to crash onto you with the strength of a moving flock. But it’s beautiful, you know? It’s as if out of every shore in the world, this wave chose you to crash upon. It has to mean something right?” 

Yoongi nods, a little absent mindedly, because he’s not sure he’s ever been in love, but he kind of understands what Jimin is saying. And as the younger keeps staring at the river laid out before them, brown hair flowing with the wind and eyes gleaming, Yoongi thinks yes, he’s starting to understand. 

“What do you mean that there’s been a mistake?”

Yoongi feels like he’s stuck in a nightmare. 

The lady at the front desk smiles apologetically at him. “I am sorry gentlemen, but I am afraid we only have one room available right now, with one bed.” 

It has to be a nightmare. Yoongi takes a deep breath in and tries his best. “But miss, you have to give us another room, or one with two beds.” For the love of God, they have to. “We can switch rooms with other people, we don’t mind. Just not a room with only one bed.” 

The lady looks deeply sorry. “I am afraid there’s nothing I can do, sir..” 

Yoongi’s hope is fading. “But, I called and I spoke to someone who said that you still had rooms available.” 

“I do understand sir, but without down payment, we can’t book a room and keep it for you.” 

This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to him. Yoongi turns to Jimin,who’s been patiently waiting for him to end his little rant with the receptionist. The younger waits for him to speak, and Yoongi doesn’t know how to break it to him. 

“Hum, so-” 

“I don’t mind sharing a bed.” Jimin immediately says. 

“You got that?” Yoongi asks. 

Jimin nods. “It’s alright. It’s just a bed. And it’s late already and I kinda want to eat and sleep.” 

“Are you certain?” 

Jimin frowns. “ Why wouldn’t I be?” 

Is Yoongi the only one seeing the issue? “Well, you’re engaged. Your fiancé might not be okay with us sharing a bed.” 

Jimin scoffs. “If he had an issue with it, he should have come with me in the first place.” He mumbles and  agan, Yoongi does think there’s a conversation waiting to happen here but still, he says nothing. Jimin clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “Hyung, it's fine. It’s just one night, we’ll just sleep, have some rest and by tomorrow we’ll find the ring and it’ll be fine.” 

“I am trying to think of your honour here.” Yoongi insists. 

Jimin starts acting dramatically. “ Oh God, oh no, he shared another bed with another man other than his fiancé! What? What will people say? Oh how dare he!” Regaining a neutral expression, he adds. “We’ll be fine.” 

“Jimin-ah..”

Jimin steps forward and addresses the lady who’s been watching their whole exchange with curious wide eyes. “We’ll take the room.” He only takes him another few seconds before he’s then handing his credit card to the lady. He sends a gleeful smile at Yoongi over his shoulder and Yoongi truly feels like dying. 

The room turns out not to be so bad. It’s big enough to have a living room area with a small couch, a coffee table and a couple of cushion chairs. A queen sized bed sits on one side of the room, and a door on the right leads to the bathroom. Yoongi stands in the doorway, taking it all in, while Jimin walks in further into the room and once he drops his suitcase by the couch, the younger starts pulling open all the drawers. 

Yoongi frowns a little as he watches him do so. Closing the door behind him, he clears his throat. “Jimin-ssi?” The younger only hums. “What are you doing?” 

Jimin is kneeling in front of one of the chest of drawers, bending slightly so he can see the back of one drawer. “I found it funny, the fact that hotels have drawers when technically you’re not supposed to stay long. So I like to see if things get left behind in those drawers.” 

Yoongi’s mouth falls open in awe, because for someone who’s been spending the better part of his life living in hotel rooms, he had never thought about that. Now he wonders if he’s ever forgotten something in a drawer somewhere, in a foreign country. And when he sees the grin on Jimin’s face when he finds something, Yoongi can’t help but smile. 

Jimin opens his palm and shows it to Yoongi. “Look! Money!” 

Yoongi steps closer, inquiring about Jimin's discovery. Indeed, a few coins sit in the younger’s palm. Yoongi spends a few seconds staring at the money, wondering where it comes from. But he soon gets distracted by the size of Jimin’s hands. He had noticed before, had felt that small hand in his for a short moment, but now that he’s seeing it, so close and all his attention is on it, he can’t help but want to hold it again. 

But that can’t be. Clears his throat, he tilts his head to the side and focuses back on the money. “I think it’s croatian money.” 

Jimin who’s been staring at me for all this time finally looks back at the coins he’s found. “Really? Oh, maybe I should go to Croatia one day.” And then, back to Yoongi, he asks. “Have you ever been there?”

Yoongi nods and he takes a seat in the cushion chair. “I have. Worked as an event coordinator for a street circus festival the summer I graduated. That’s where I met Jin hyung actually.” 

Yoongi smiles as he remembers how it had happened. He was helping set up a stage with the other guys from the crew, and suddenly he had heard this loud laugh and when he had turned around, he had found Seokjin laughing at someone making an animal balloon. Yoongi hadn’t known what was so funny about this but he had talked to Seokjin afterwards and well, the rest was history to him. 

Jimin hums and continues rummaging through the drawers while Yoongi watches him. A silence falls over the room, and Yoongi wonders. When did Jimin start doing this, looking for things in hotel room’s drawers? Why is he doing this really? Is he looking for something in particular? 

Well, other than his engagement ring. 

Which raises another question in Yoongi’s brain. One he can’t keep for himself.

“Jimin-ah?” 

“Yes hyung?” 

“How does one lose their engagement ring?” 

Jimin freezes where he is, crouching down on the floor. Turning around, he uses his feet to sit back on them, his knees touching the floor this time. “Why are you asking me this? 

Yoongi feels a little conflicted. “I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but.. aren’t people who get engaged wear their ring all the time? Because they’re happy about it?” 

Jimin purses his lips. “I told you it was too small for me. It hurt when I was wearing it.” 

Yoongi nods. “Yes, you did, but you could have gotten it fixed anywhere. Jewellers do this all the time. It wouldn’t have taken that much time..” 

“Hyung.” Jimin’s voice is different. A little drier. “I am only asking you to help me in finding it. I don’t need a lecture from you either.” 

Yoongi looks down at his hands in his lap. “I am sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.” He decides to change the subject completely. How about we go eat outside and you can have the malakoff ? How does that sound?”

Jimin doesn’t smile, but he nods. “Sure, I’ll start getting ready.” He stands up and dusts off his pants.

“It’s just dinner.” Yoongi says. “Just wear anything.” 

Jimin gives him a pointed look while gesturing at himself with his hand. “Do you think this just happen?”

Yoongi huffs a laugh and shakes his head. Jimin chuckles and the tension that had appeared in the room just a few seconds ago somehow dissipates. Jimin leaves the coins he’s found on the coffee table and stretches his arms over his head before walking over to his suitcase. Grabbing his carry-on suitcase, he heads to the bathroom. “You should take a nap, I’m going to be in there for a while.” 

Yoongi frowns but decides he doesn’t want to be groggy later, which he knows would happen if he were to take a nap. Staring at the coins Jimin left behind, he gets an idea. 

“I think I’ll just go take a walk. Hopefully, find a nice restaurant we can eat at.” Standing up, he makes sure to take some of the coins and carefully tucks them in his pocket. “I’ll be back in about an hour, okay?” 

“Sure!” Jimin answers from the bathroom. 

Yoongi quickly grabs his wallet and phone and heads outside of the hotel room. 

An hour later, he gets back to the hotel room, gift secured, and once he enters the room, he finds Jimin staring at himself in the full-length mirror placed on one side of the room, near the bed. Once he spots Yoongi, he turns around, beaming. “Ha good, you’re back! How do I look?” 

Yoongi, who froze in the doorway upon seeing Jimin, wonders what did he do in another life to deserve such torture. Jimin stands there, all dressed up in a fancy silky blue shirt, and tight black pants. The leather boots are shining, along with the jewellery the younger is always sporting. His brown hair is combed perfectly, parted on the side, showing off Jimin’s beautiful and delicate features. 

Yoongi gulps and truly, truly doesn’t know how he’s supposed to respond. Honesty would be appreciated, he thinks, but in this situation, he would highly be inappropriate. And lying would just be too obvious. So like the strong and mature man he is, he decides to divert the subject. 

“How do you keep leather boots in a carry-on suitcase?” He asks, closing the door behind him. 

Jimin rolls his eyes at him, with a smile. “You can keep anything anywhere if you try hard enough. It’s only a matter of knowing how to fold.” 

Yoongi stares at him, dubiously. “Folding? Really?” 

“Yes. How do you keep your clothes in your suitcases?” Jimin questions as he starts pulling at the bracelets on his wrists, making sure they’re all in place. 

“Well, I fold them the regular way-” 

“Wrong!” Jimin points at him. “You have to roll them! Like tubes! Takes less place, and that way, you get to have shoes in your carry-on suitcase.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, as if this is totally normal. 

Yoongi glances away, choosing to change the subject yet again. Reaching for his back pocket, he takes out the small box the jeweller gave him. “I hope you can find some room for this.” Extending the box to Jimin, he waits for the younger to take it. 

Jimin stares at it, eyes confused and if Yoongi would know better, he’d say he’s a little scared too. “What is it?” 

“Open it, you’ll see.” 

“It’s not another engagement ring, is it?” 

It’s Yoongi’s turn to roll his eyes.  “I am not like that.” 

Jimin takes a few steps forward and takes the small box. He opens it carefully and Yoongi tries to will his heart to slow down a little otherwise it’ll jump out of his chest at any moment. He looks away from Jimin, and goes to his own suitcase and starts to bring it to the bathroom. He’s halfway in closing the door when Jimin speaks up. 

“Thank you, hyung.” 

Yoongi only sends him a smile. “Don’t mention it.” And then closes the bathroom door behind him. 

The coin sits prettily around Jimin’s neck, and it keeps catching the light, thanks to the reflecting chandelier. It had looked pretty once the jeweller had done his magic but now, against Jimin’s tanned complexion, it looks even more splendid. Yoongi had noticed the few necklaces around the younger’s neck earlier but the newly made necklace now shines alone, in all its glory. 

The restaurant is nice, not so overly crowded that it’s too loud, but not so empty that it’s awkward. They’re seated outside, the warm air of the night surrounding them. A few pairs of guests sit at other tables near them, but not too close, which keeps a sense of intimacy around Jimin and Yoongi. Not that there should be, Yoongi admits to himself, but with the way Jimin keeps glancing at him over his glass of wine at times, Yoongi feels .. fidgety. 

They’re having their main course, and Jimin ordered a typical Berner Platte and his eyes gleam as the waiter places the steaming food in front of him. Yoongi thanks him for the two of them and Jimin barely waits before he digs in. He’s already chewing on his first bite when Yoongi laughs. “Hold on, little ogre, no one’s going to take it away from you.” 

Jimin doesn’t even answer, just shuts his eyes in pure delight. A low moan even crosses the barrier sound, and Yoongi almost chokes on his own wine. Almost. 

Dinner goes smoothly, and the two men make nice and light conversation. Mid-conversation, Yoongi realizes that it’s easy, it’s almost too easy to speak to Jimin. Every topic flows naturally, no awkward silence is felt, and when their laughter dies down slightly, and the two of them stare at each other under the Swiss night sky, Yoongi thinks he doesn’t mind easy. At some point, the restaurant’s crew

Jimin pours the last bit of the bottle of wine in his glass, and Yoongi, a little tipsy, gasps. “How selfish are you.” 

Jimin giggles, also a little tipsy. “Sorry, here you can have some from my glass.” 

Jimin offers his glass to Yoongi who takes it without a second thought. He does take a few sips from the glass before handing it back to Jimin. Yoongi focuses on Jimin’s movements, how he brings the glass upwards slowly, how he swirls the liquid, eyebrows furrowed in deep thought, before he brings the glass to his lips, ready to sip. Yoongi is entranced by the sight, those soft-looking, plump lips, wrapping around the edge of the glass, the liquid coating them in a nice, sheer shine. Yoongi notices how Jimin drank from the same spot as he did. In a way, it’s like his lips touched Jimin’s. An indirect kiss, somehow. A thought he shouldn’t be having, he knows that. He’s not drunk enough that he’s lost all his senses but the thought grows and Yoongi asks himself. 

What would it feel like to kiss Jimin? 

Would he taste of sunrise, of spring air and flowers? Would he taste bittersweet, like the wine they’ve just had? Would he taste like sin, like a forbidden fruit Yoongi shouldn’t even look upon? Or would he taste like salvation, like a found religion that starts and ends on his lips? 

Jimin places the glass of wine back on the table, clicking his tongue. His eyes fall on Yoongi, who’s still staring. Jimin tilts his head and smiles at him. “Hyung? You like me a lot don’t you?” 

A heavy question. One that Yoongi isn’t sure that he should even answer. But one that he’s certain shouldn’t even be asked. The answer is simple, but full of implications. Implications he can’t possibly get himself into. For his sake and Jimin’s. So he shrugs and runs a hand through his dark strands. “It’s my own problem to deal with. Don’t worry about it.” 

Jimin pouts, thinking. “Is that why you gifted me this?” His hand comes up to touch the necklace, the small coin pendant still flickering in the night. 

Yoongi shakes his head. “No. That was an apology.” 

“An apology?” Jimin looks confused. 

“I made you upset earlier, asking you questions I shouldn’t be asking. So this necklace is an apology.” He answers simply. 

Jimin looks down at the necklace, pursuing his lips. “ That’s a first.”

“What is?” Yoongi is the one being confused now. 

“Someone going this far to apologize to me.” Jimin looks up again, but he keeps playing with the pendant. “I can’t remember the last time an apology was more than a simple sorry.” 

Yoongi sighs. “I want to say that maybe you need better people around you but that would sound a little conceited.” 

Jimin lets out a series of low giggles, eyes turning into moon crescents and Yoongi has just found a new favourite sight and a new favourite sound. “You’re funny, Min Yoongi.” 

Yoongi smiles. “I know.” 

Jimin raises an eyebrow at him. “ Not telling me that  I am hot anymore?” 

“You don’t need me to say it in order to know.” 

“Won’t hurt to hear it.” 

“You’re still engaged.” 

“Still, you gave me a necklace.” 

“As an apology.” 

“It kind of feels like a courting gift.” 

 “I take it back, you’re not hot, just impossible.” 

“The two aren’t mutually exclusive.” 

Jimin grins as he retorts and Yoongi lets out a sigh. The little bickering back and forth is fun and it feels Yoongi with a little giddy inside, truly like he’s at school and his crush just looked at him in the hallway. There’s a warmth spreading inside, as always when he’s around Jimin, though he knows he shouldn’t feel like this. Yoongi looks upwards at the sky. Dark and star-less, it engulfs the city below completely. It feels like a large dome, or a bubble wrapped around them, as if as long as they’re there, anything could happen and it won’t matter. 

“Thank you for the necklace, hyung.” Jimin whispers and Yoongi hears it clearly, as if the younger had spoken directly in his ear. 

“You’ve already said that.” Yoongi says, as he looks back at Jimin. He’s been looking at the younger for a couple of days now, but every time his eyes fall upon him, it feels like a first time. 

Jimin is still smiling. “But I really mean it. Thank you. For the necklace. For helping me with all of this. I am not sure I would have been able to do it on my own.” 

Yoongi shakes his head. “Of course you would have been able to. I have a feeling there’s nothing you can’t do once you set your heart to.” 

Jimin lets out a sigh. “You have too much faith in me, I am afraid.” 

As he looks at him, Jimin looking like a renaissance painting coming alive, Yoongi is afraid of something else entirely. 

He clears his throat, not wanting to let the feeling overtake him. “Should we order dessert?” And when Jimin pouts, Yoongi adds. “I promise I won’t propose by the end.” 

Jimin laughs and shakes his head. “Pretty sure my first thought wouldn’t be no this time.” 

Yoongi freezes as he was about to call for a waiter but Jimin’s words surprise him so much that he wonders if he even heard him correctly. Jimin has his eyes shut and he’s biting his bottom lip, like a child who got caught stealing candy. 

“Please, let’s just pretend I didn’t say that.” 

Yoongi wants to, he really does, but.. What even? “I mean.. sure, we can, but .. are you alright?” 

Jimin lets his face fall in his palms. “I can’t believe I just said that.” 

Yoongi glances around, unsure of what to do. He wants to reach out to Jimin but they’re still in public. The younger looks so panicked and disconcerted that Yoongi decides to forget about it all. Reaching across the table, he grabs one of Jimin’s hands and takes it in his. “Jimin, hey, look at me.” 

The brunette does look up, eyes teary and full of fear, and Yoongi’s heart feels his heart breaking slightly. “It’s okay. Everyone has doubts about this kind of stuff. It’s alright.” Yoongi feels like a hypocrite speaking, because yes, he has never been in this situation before this happens, right? People do get nervous about engagement and marriage and everything related to this? That’s normal.. right? 

“It’s just.. it’s a sign, right?” Jimin says, fingers gripping Yoongi’s like a lifeline. “I mean, I didn’t really want to say yes in the first place, and I thought that the ring being small was already a sign, but I figured out, it’s a detail, so it’s okay.” Jimin sniffles slightly while Yoongi listens to him intently. “But then I lost it altogether and I thought this is it.This is the sign. But then, I thought about his family and mine, I can’t disappoint them. If I go back to Seoul without a ring, it’ll mean everything, hyung and I can’t have that.” 

Yoongi had felt that there was something lying under the surface, because everything was just too weird to be normal, but now with what Jimin is saying… Yoongi wants to ask, but doesn’t know if he’s allowed to. He’s already made Jimin upset earlier because he asked about the ring, and now.. 

“Let’s just go back okay?” He says, pulling on Jimin’s hand slightly. The younger looks at him with teary, but hopeful eyes, like Yoongi somehow has all the answers. “You’re exhausted from the trip, and under a lot of stress, so let’s just have a good night of sleep and tomorrow morning we’ll go to the Kunstmuseum and find your ring there, okay?” 

Jimin doesn’t move for a few seconds, just stares at Yoongi openly, before he nods. The two rise up from the table. Yoongi goes to pay the bill at the front of the restaurant, and he’s ready to let go of Jimin’s hand but the brunette doesn’t let him. Yoongi is pulling away, letting go of his grip on the younger’s fingers, but Jimin catches his hand, and holds on. It feels.. strange. Different. Nice. 

Jimin follows him as they head back inside the restaurant. Yoongi is struggling slightly to pay with one hand, but he’s almost afraid to let go of Jimin. Or of what the younger might do if he does let go. They leave the restaurant, walking out in the fresh air, and the whole way back to the hotel, Jimin’s hand doesn’t leave Yoongi’s hand. 

Yoongi tries to remember the last time he held hands this long with someone this long, or even walked hand in hand with someone, but like always, no memory comes to him. It’s still unnerving, how no matter how hard he tries to remember, it feels like he’s a newborn with no recollection of anything. Has he truly been living this long without feeling any kind of affection. Yoongi loves people, he truly does, he works with people for a living after all. 

So why does everything with Jimin feel so different? 

Because this feels different. This does not feel like he’s a tour guide who’s helping Jimin find his engagement ring. No. It awfully feels like they’re together, a couple who is taking a night stroll after enjoying a fancy dinner at a restaurant. They look like it, if the looks and smiles that people are sending them are any indication for it. Yoongi notices them, and he’s almost scared to look at Jimin, afraid that the younger can see them too. He’s already so upset, he doesn’t want him to feel worse. 

When they reach the hotel room, Yoongi doesn’t turn on the light immediately. It’s not dark enough that they can’t see around, so he leads Jimin to the bed after closing the door behind them. “You take the bed, I’ll take the couch.” 

He steps away, fingers loosening in Jimin’s grip, but Jimin still doesn’t let go. “Don’t leave me.” Yoongi freezes, looking down at Jimin. He looks so small, sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at Yoongi’s hand in his. “Can you hold me?” 

Yoongi’s mouth falls open, ready to retort that no, he can’t, for so many reasons, but Jimin is already speaking again. “Please. Just for a little while.” 

“Jimin.. I shouldn’t. You’re engaged, it’d be wrong.” It truly would be. Still, there’s a part of Yoongi that desperately wants to know how it feels like to hold Jimin, to have his little frame against him, to have him in his arms. But Yoongi also knows that he cannot give in into that part of him. 

But the look of disappointment on Jimin’s face..

“How about, you change into something comfortable and get into the bed and I’ll sit on the floor and stay with you until you’ll fall asleep , alright?” Yoongi suggests, and the look of disappointment is somewhat gone, but is only replaced with complacency when Jimin nods. He does let go of Yoongi’s hand then, and takes off his shoes. 

He goes to the bathroom after grabbing some clothes from his suitcase and Yoongi lets himself breathe for a minute. Gosh. This is.. a lot. A lot more than he had expected for a simple trip. But nothing about this was ever meant to be simple, wasn’t it? Yoongi had known in a way, deep down inside, the moment he had taken Jimin’s phone with Seokjin hyung on the other line. 

When Jimin comes out of the bathroom, he’s changed, mirroring Yoongi who’s switched his black jeans for grey joggers. Now wearing a light t-shirt and black short pants, Jimin makes his way to the bed. 

“Are you certain you wouldn’t be more comfortable on the bed?” Jimin asks as he’s fluffing a pillow. 

Yoongi nods from his spot on the floor. He’s sitting by the bed, turned towards Jimin, waiting for the younger to settle in. He won’t lie, he would feel much more comfortable on the bed, but he meant it when he said it wasn’t right. Yoongi is a lot of things, but selfish isn’t one of them. 

Jimin lies on his side, already extending a hand towards Yoongi. Yoongi smiles as he takes it, relishing in the warmth that’s growing familiar little by little. “You really like holding hands, don’t you.” 

Jimin returns his smile, but Yoongi is sure it looks much softer on the younger. “Do you mind it?” 

Yoongi shrugs slightly. “Not at all. If it helps, I am glad to hold them.” He says truthfully and he hopes Jimin knows he means it. 

Jimin sighs, his cheeks slowly growing bigger as he rests his head against the pillow. Yoongi thinks he’d like to touch them, poke them lightly or squeeze them but no. If this trip, this whole experience is teaching him anything, it’s self control.

“You have nice hands.” Jimin whispers. The room is dark and outside, Yoongi knows there is a buzzing world. Cars speeding in streets, people dancing in clubs and having dinners, planes landing and taking off. Outside, there’s a world, but nothing about that matters when Park Jimin speaks those four words to Yoongi. 

It’s only four words. Four simple words stringed together in a sentence. Yoongi has heard multiple four-word-sentences before. But Jimin speaks those words, in that particular order, and it’s like the whole world has shifted on a new axis. Yoongi stays there, sitting on this soft carpeted floor and he’s holding this young man’s hand, and he thinks. 

Is this it?

 Is this what it feels like to fall?

Jimin is staring right back at him, eyelids fluttering gently, and Yoongi watches as his body is rising with each breath. Jimin’s grip on him is strong but with each passing second, it’s lessening, but still very much present. 

“Hyung?” Jimin’s lips barely move when he speaks, to the point where Yoongi wonders if he’s truly spoken. Yoongi doesn’t answer, doesn’t need to when they’re already both staring at each other in the dark, their intertwined hands resting in between them. He just leans his head on the edge of the bed and waits for Jimin to continue. « You really like me, don’t you ? »

Ha. Yes. The 1 billion Won question again. 

Yoongi doesn’t sigh, doesn’t glance away, doesn’t shy away from Jimin’s eyes, nor does he start thinking about a white lie. No. All he does is stare at Jimin, his pretty face, his delicate skin. 

They’re close somehow, a different kind of closeness. Yoongi has been close to people, he has had his fair share of summer flings where all he remembers is laying naked in bed, basking in the bright afternoon light, his skin still glistening with the remains of his activities. He has been close with people, closer than tears and eyelashes, closer a heart and beat, closer than a moth and a flame. He has. But this. 

This is something else. 

He’s sitting on the floor of a hotel room, staring at an engaged man while holding his hand in the dark, and Yoongi thinks this is the closest to someone he’s ever going to get. 

And when Yoongi thinks about it, when Jimin’s question remains unanswered and the younger falls asleep, brown staring into brown, when he can’t decipher his breathing from Jimin’s, he thinks maybe falling isn’t so bad. It’s not simple but the wind rushing through his ears is a comforting sound on his way to the bottom. 

When Yoongi wakes up in the morning, he's blinded by the sunlight coming from the big window. He has to blink a few times to get used to it, and he looks around and sees that he did fall asleep on the floor, next to the bed. Holding onto Jimin’s small hand. When his eyes finally adjust and he turns to look at Jimin, still soundly asleep, Yoongi can’t help the smile spreading on his lips. With the morning light shining directly on him, Jimin looks nothing short of an angel, or at least, that’s how Yoongi thinks of him. His hand is still secured in Jimin’s, looking as if they both held onto one another during the night. Yoongi’s head falls back against the soft edge of the bed, unable to tear his eyes away from Jimin’s sleeping face. He knows he’s staring, and he knows he shouldn’t; he shouldn’t be feeding in this little growing crush of his, but well. He also knows this is all he’s ever going to have with Jimin. This is all he's allowed to have. 

When Jimin stirs awake, eyebrows furrowing and eyes squinting, Yoongi smiles. It takes the younger a few seconds to open his eyes and when he sees Yoongi’s eyes staring at him already, he shows a smile too. 

“Oh. Good morning.” Jimin whispers, voice all hoarse from sleep. “How long have you been awake?” 

“A few minutes.” Yoongi answers, still staring openly. A part of him thinks he should be embarrassed, but then, Jimin is watching him too, and the two of them are lost in each other’s eyes for a good while. This isn’t right, Yoongi thinks. Jimin is engaged, staring in another man’s eyes is the last thing he should be doing. They should be getting ready to go and find Jimin’s ring. But still, neither of them move. 

“Did you sleep well?” Yoongi whispers. 

Jimin nods shyly. “Best sleep of my life.” Jimin sighs against the pillow. With all the sunlight shining on him, he truly looks like an angel fallen from heaven. “Thank you for staying by me through the night.” 

It’s such a simple thing, a simple sentence, but Jimin says it with the softest voice, with the kindest eyes, and it awakens something inside Yoongi, something he had only been partially aware of, especially ever since Jimin knocked on his hotel room door three days ago. God, only three days ago, but somehow it feels like they’ve been with each other for more. Weeks, months. Forever. 

Yoongi tugs on Jimin’s hand a little. “We should get up.” Then, adds for good measure. “We have to find your ring.”

Something crosses Jimin’s face for a while, the ghost of a feeling that Yoongi has no name for, but it kills Jimin’s smile and the nod he gives Yoongi is short and serious, and when Jimin sits up, his hand leaving Yoongi’s, an immense cold spreads through Yoongi and he wonders if it’s punished for having spoken. Or just punishment for irrevocably falling for someone he can’t have. 

The Kunstmuseum is just like the last time Yoongi and Jimin visited. Which wasn’t that long ago so it’s bound to not have changed much. Yoongi is a little surprised when the man at the front desk remembers them, and once Yoongi explains their situation in his best Bernese German, the man’s eyes widen. 

“ Oh Ja! Ein Ring! Bitte warte hier! ” The man whispers something to his colleague who only nods and smiles at Jimin and Yoongi. 

Yoongi gives her a smile before turning to Jimin. “He said to wait here.” Jimin only nods in acknowledgement. Yoongi noticed how quiet Jimin had been ever since they had gotten up. None of the cheerful giggles at breakfast, nor the incessant rambling he likes to get into as they had walked there. No, Jimin had been so quiet that Yoongi couldn't help but find it a little strange. Spending all of his days with Jimin had somehow gotten him accustomed to the younger’s endearing antics. But now.. 

“Hey, don’t be nervous. Maybe that’s a good thing, maybe they found it.” Yoongi tries to be reassuring but no happy emotion breaks Jimin’s solemn face. 

Jimin only looks straight ahead, at a spot at the wall, and Yoongi stares at him, trying to figure out what could have made him so upset. Did he say something during the night? Did he do something? Did he receive a text after they woke up? Yoongi remembers the younger checking his phone and groaning slightly. He hadn’t thought much about it, but maybe he received bad news and now it’s downing on him. Or maybe it could be because of what he said at the restaurant? About wanting to decline the proposal in the first place? All these questions and no answers, no way of undoing the small frown in Jimin’s chin and Yoongi feels stuck. Back in Hamburg, a simple teasing and flirty jokes had done the trick at cheering Jimin up, but something tells him that this won’t go away with something like this. Would a hug comfort him? They’re standing in the middle of the entrance of a big museum, and people are already staring a little because of that. And maybe it’s a little redundant, but Yoongi doesn’t see any other option. 

Gently, he lets his hand wrap around Jimin’s palm and give it a little squeeze. Not much but Yoongi hopes it’s enough to let Jimin know that he’s not alone, that if need be, Yoongi is there. He’s ready to pull his hand away but Jimin doesn’t let him. With force, Jimin wraps his fingers around his and Yoongi can’t help but stare down at their joined hands. Jimin doesn’t move, only holds Yoongi’s hand, keeping it in place. Jimin’s grip isn’t that strong, Yoongi could easily pull away if he wanted to. 

He could. 

He should. 

But he’s a little selfish, so he just lets his hand be held. And when he looks up at Jimin, he notices the little frown on his chin has faded a little. 

A few minutes later, the receptionist comes back, holding a small box. Yoongi and Jimin both walk closer to the counter. The man places the box on the counter, and opens it. Looking at both Jimin and Yoongi, he explains. “These are all found rings. Some have been here for years so it might not be yours, but some have been recently so yours could be in there.” 

Inside the box, multiple rings do sit there, they all look different, and some are really not the engagement ring type. But a few do look like they once belonged on someone’s fingers. Yoongi turns to Jimin, who’s staring at the rings in the box. The younger’s fingers are still wrapped around his but Yoongi feels the moment he starts to let go. It happens slowly and quickly, all at once. Slowly as Yoongi can feel each part of his skin becoming cold at the loss of contact. Quickly as it almost feels like Jimin’s hand was never there in the first place. 

Jimin starts going through the rings carefully, turning some over, looking at them with attention. Yoongi feels his heart racing his chest at the thought that Jimin’s ring could be in there. His heart might jump out of his chest if it beats any faster, but he’s so scared. So afraid that this is the end. 

And when Jimin pulls out a ring out of the box. 

Well. 

The ring does look beautiful, it already looked like it in the pictures Yoongi saw, but seeing it in front of him makes it even more beautiful. The diamond gem sits prettily on the silver band and Yoongi wonders for a second how much it cost. Definitely more than he had to pay for the necklace he gifted Jimin, that’s sure. 

“It’s this one.” Jimin says to the man, holding the ring in between his fingers. 

The receptionist sighs in relief. “Oh that’s so great!” 

Yoongi offers him a tight smile. “Thank you for help.” 

“It was my pleasure.” The man says. He takes the box back and leaves the counter, probably returning the box where he took it from. Yoongi turns to Jimin, who hasn’t moved. Still holding the ring in his fingers, the brunette is watching it, an unknown expression on his face. 

Yoongi doesn’t know what to say. He feels like he ought to say something but he also doesn’t feel like what he wants to say would be appropriate. So he bites his tongue and waits. 

It takes Jimin a minute or two but then he sighs, and finally moves a little. “He’s going to be so happy.” 

Yoongi’s heart breaks in his chest. This is it then. There are so many fake congratulatory words on his tongue, but he can’t find it in himself to speak them.

“I should call him.” Jimin speaks up. Jimin doesn’t have to say who’s him, Yoongi knows and somehow it makes this whole thing, this whole journey feels wrong. A part of him feels like he shouldn’t be the one here. A part of him feels like this isn’t his place. He really shouldn’t be the one next to Jimin right now. It should be his fiancé. It shouldn’t be Yoongi feeling all of these things. It’s wrong. 

“We should head back to the hotel so you can plan everything.” He says, because if this is the end, it’d rather not drag it out painfully. 

Jimin nods and after thanking the receptionists again, the two men leave the Kunstmuseum. The walk back to their hotel is silent and Yoongi only looks down and he pretends he doesn’t see how Jimin’s fist is clenched tight at his side. He’s right to keep the ring in his hand this tightly, Yoongi thinks, now is not the time to lose it again. 

Once they get to their room, Yoongi stops. “I’ll go for a walk and give you some time to call your fiancé and tell him the good news.” 

Jimin looks scared when Yoongi offers that. “You don’t have to.” 

“It’s alright. Take your time. I’ll probably go and go by the bookstore or something.” Or find a corner and scream out his feelings. 

“Do you want me to join you there afterwards?” Jimin asks. 

Yoongi shakes his head. “No no, it’s fine, just take your time, alright? Call your fiancé, book your tickets for your trip home, plan a party. I am sure everyone is going to be relieved you’re flying back.” 

Yes, everyone. 

Except Yoongi. 

Jimin glances away. “Yeah..Alright. I’ll see you later?” 

Yoongi nods and he’s ready to turn away, but he takes one last look at Jimin. Jimin and his fluffy brown hair, Jimin and his pretty eyes and his pretty lips and his fair skin and his long neck. The necklace Yoongi gave him is still there, resting beautifully against his skin. Will Jimin still wear it once he’s back home? Won’t his fiancé wonder about it? Will he ask? 

“I’ll see you later.” He says before more questions can drown him in sorrow. 

Yoongi does end up going to a bookstore, but the whole time he’s there, all he can see is the couple who keeps giggling and whispering sweet nothings in each other’s ears. He tries to not let it bother him, he really does, but all he can think about is how he doesn’t have someone to share secrets with and giggle about random things. He doesn’t have anyone to show a book cover to and laugh about it. No one is whispering sweet nothings in his ear. 

A few days ago Yoongi didn’t even want that. These things never bothered him before. But now. After so many days spent with Jimin, all Yoongi wants is this. 

He leaves the bookstore empty handed and walks along the Aar river. It’s colder by the water, but the sun hitting his skin is warm enough that he barely feels it. Yoongi thinks about Jimin as he often does lately. It’s hard not to when he spends most of his days with him. Which reminds Yoongi that this is ending soon. In a few hours probably, Jimin will be gone and Yoongi will be alone again. This is what he originally wanted. Some peace and quiet alone time. But now that the prospect of having it finally near.. he’s not so sure he wants it. 

Overlooking at the river, he wonders if this is what reaching the bottom alone feels like. He had known he was falling lately, and hadn't had time to stop himself. But he had stepped off the edge so fast, before he could even realize it. Everything had happened so fast, he had barely had time to think about it. And now here he was. At the bottom of a pit, looking up at the clear sky, waiting for someone to join him. But he knows no one is. 

Going back to the hotel room, he finds Jimin sitting on the floor by the end of the bed, leaning his back against it. Yoongi chuckles when he sees it, closing the door behind him. “You know they don’t put couches and chairs and the bed just for decoration purposes right?” He walks towards the bathroom, hoping to wash his hands after being outside for so long.

Jimin raises his head when Yoongi speaks and judging by the look on his face, Yoongi feels like he won’t like the next words out of his mouth. “I am leaving for Seoul tonight.” 

Yoongi stops in his tracks. “Oh.” Turning towards Jimin, he sees the closed off look on the younger’s face. “That’s..” A series of adjectives come to him but he can’t say any of them. So he settles on the truth. “That’s soon.” 

Jimin nods. “My flight is at 6pm.” A sigh. “My ticket is already paid for, courtesy of my in-laws.”

6pm. It’s currently 11am. That means they would only have 7 hours left to spend together. Yoongi doesn’t know why he thinks that, why he needs to have a ticking clock on top of their time together but somehow, he can’t help it. This, these seven hours, all they’re meant to have. 

“That’s.. early.” Yoongi says, and he stands there, by the door of the bathroom, watching as Jimin nods shortly again. “Your fiancé must be really excited to have you back home.” 

Jimin scoffs. “He’s not even picking me up at the airport.” 

Yoongi frowns at that. “What? How come?” 

“He has early meetings tomorrow, so he said he’ll send someone.” 

Yoongi hasn’t had that many serious relationships, at least none where he needed to pick someone up at the airport but he knows this isn’t right. “That’s bullshit.” 

Jimin turns his head as soon as Yoongi says those words. “Excuse me?” 

“Who makes someone fly across the world on such short notice and doesn’t even pick them up?” Yoongi lets out and he doesn’t know why he’s getting so mad, but this is just.. a lot. 

“Hyung, it’s fine. I’m used to it.” Jimin waves it off. 

“So?” Yoongi retorts. “Jimin-ah, just because you’re used to something doesn’t make it okay.” 

Jimin tilts his head, eyes narrowed at him. “How so? How would you treat me if you were my fiancé?” 

Yoongi shouldn’t, he shouldn’t answer, shouldn’t even entertain the idea. But if Jimin asks , then it’s okay, right? 

“I would have never made you stay on your own in the first place.” Yoongi answers. And maybe it’s selfish to indulge in that fantasy but that’s all he has. That’s all he is allowed. “If I had a fiancé who looked like you, I wouldn’t be so secure knowing you’re spending your days with another man. I would have stayed with you, but then again, I don’t think the ring would have been lost in the first place, because I would have made sure that the engagement ring I am getting my boyfriend would actually fit.” 

Jimin stares at him, a certain glint in his brown eyes and Yoongi wonders if he should continue, if he’s allowed to indulge a little more. 

“I wouldn’t leave you alone, and if I had to, I would find a way to stay. And if I really had to leave you alone, then, I would probably spend all my time on the phone talking to you, making sure you’re okay. I would make sure that even if I am not physically here, you know you can reach me at any time. Because you could. Because that’s how you should be treated.” 

He lets out a long breath after saying all of that. It hurts, a little, a lot. But it’s just a little dream, a dream he’ll never reach, one he can only stare up at from the bottom of his pit. 

Jimin smiles at him, a sad smile that Yoongi knows is going to haunt him forever. 

“How I wish I had met you earlier.” He just says and Yoongi mirrors his sad smile. 

“I would have loved to be the one taking you on an European tour.” Yoongi admits. “Showing you all the beautiful places, not the ones I showed on the tour, the actual good ones.” 

“Is that where you’re going after this?” Jimin asks. 

Yoongi shrugs. “I don’t know.” To be honest, he hadn’t thought about that yet. “I had plans to go to Paris after the tour ended, so maybe I’ll go there. Walk by the Seine.” 

“That does sound nice.” Jimin says. 

Yoongi sees the sadness on his face, and just like the first time he saw it, he can’t stand it. 

“Hey, come on, it’s lunch time, I know a place where we can have the best lunch for almost nothing!” He walks towards Jimin and nudges him a little. The younger bare

ly moves so Yoongi crouches and tilts his head so Jimin can see him. “Come on, handsome, let’s have some nice and fun time before you go.”

Jimin purses his lips but nods. “Yeah, let’s go.”

And Yoongi wasn’t lying and they do have a nice and fun time together. It takes about half an hour before a real smile appears on Jimin’s lips and it’s thanks to the cotton candy Yoongi gets for him. They end up walking along to the Aar, and having food at almost every street vendor they pass by, and by mid-afternoon, Yoongi’s belly aches from too much sugar and laughing too much. But one look at Jimin’s crinkling eyes and he thinks it’s all worth it. All the bad jokes he tells, all the faces he pulls, all the money he’s spending on food, it’s all worth it. Jimin is laughing and smiling and it’s all worth it. And Yoongi sees it all, takes it all in, prints the images in his brain for cold nights. He wants to remember this, so when Jimin points his phone at him, he smiles and lets himself be recorded and he’s only fueled by the way Jimin hides his growing smile behind his sleeves. But Yoongi can see it. He can. 

But 6 pm arrives far too fast and time only goes faster when you don’t want it to. Watching Jimin pack is hard and Yoongi stays by the wall, arms crossed over his chest. They both leave the hotel, heading for the airport. The airport is filled with people, even for a week day but Yoongi knows that’s not why he feels so anxious. He waits by Jimin as he registers and checks in. He walks by as they head for the security check and when they reach the gate, Yoongi feels his heart at the bottom of his stomach. 

Jimin turns to him. “So. I suppose this is goodbye.” He says. The airport hall is buzzing with people around them, all moving and running to catch their flights, going home , leaving home, about to explore the world. Only the two of them, Jimin and Yoongi, stand there, in the middle of the vast area and it feels like the clock has stopped. 

Yoongi nods. “ I suppose so.” He manages to say.

Jimin fidgets with his fingers, and Yoongi notices how the ring shines against Jimin’s tan skin. He had seen Jimin put it on earlier, but still the sight of it is strange. So many days under the European sun only made him even more handsome. Yoongi can’t take his eyes off of him, no matter how much he tells himself that he should. He just wants one more look, one more touch, one more second looking at Jimin. 

“Will you call?” The younger’s voice is soft and melodious as always, but there’s a nostalgic lyricism to it today, the cheerful airy tone of his laugh long gone. 

Yoongi wishes he could. And he wants to. His heart sighs in his chest at the thought of spending long nights on the phone with Jimin, hearing his sweet voice from the other side of the world. But these are only dreams that have to be killed in the womb so he shakes his head, letting logic rule over him. “Probably not.”

Jimin nods, pursing his lips. “Probably for the better.”

Better for both of them , Yoongi thinks. Jimin isn’t meant to be his. They’re not meant to have more than this. These few days worth of booming laughs while running down a paved street, of quick german food shared by the river, of longing looks exchanged in the intimacy of a bus ride. But he doesn’t say more. This is all they’re allowed to have. 

Suddenly, a voice calls again for the passengers of Jimin's flight, echoing through the hall. 

This is it. This is the end. Throat tight, and heart crushed at his feet, Yoongi braces himself. 

“Take care of yourself, okay?” He says, trying to keep a clear voice. 

“You too, hyung.” Jimin says, and with a heavy sigh, he grabs his handbag and turns around. Yoongi stays there, standing as he watches Jimin go through the boarding checks. He waits as Jimin goes through everything, waits as the younger puts his jacket and shoes back on. Then, he watches and stands there as Jimin turns around, one last time, before waving goodbye at Yoongi. 

It’s a small gesture. But somehow, it’s enough to break the dam of Yoongi’s composure, and a small tear escapes on his cheek. He just prays that Jimin is too far away to see, too far away to know. 

Walking back to the front of the airport is long, longer than Yoongi had imagined it would be on his own. He’s spent half of his life in airports, he knows his way out of them, but somehow, he’s dragging his feet as he leaves. No one told him that falling feels wonderful, like flying almost, until the bone crush when he reaches the bottom. Because he is, he’s reached the bottom, down to his knees and no clear way up. He hears something being yelled but he doesn’t really register it, so deep in his pain. How could he not be when he feels like he’s just left the love-

“Hyung!” 

Yoongi stops in his tracks at the sound of that voice. Has he gone mad? Has he already gone completely crazy with sorrow that he’s now hallucinating voices?

“Hyung!” 

When he turns around, he doesn’t think he’s crazy. And if he’s crazy, do not ask for medical attention. 

Jimin is running towards him at full speed, and when he crashes into Yoongi, they both stumble back a little but Yoongi keeps Jimin safe, holding him. Jimin holds onto just as tightly, not pulling away even as Yoongi makes sure that they’re both firmly planted on the ground. Yoongi feels like he’s dreaming. Did Jimin..

“Jimin-ah?” 

Jimin shakes his head that’s buried in the crook of Yoongi’s neck right now. “I can’t. I can’t marry him.” 

Yoongi’s eyes widen, and his heart starts racing again. “Jimin-ah?” He says again, hoping that the younger will understand that Yoongi is going to need more than that. Jimin does pull away lightly but he keeps his arms around Yoongi’s neck. It’s the closest they’ve been since that one afternoon in Hamburg. But this time, Jimin isn’t crying, neither is he sad because he hasn’t found his engagement ring. No, this time he’s looking at Yoongi, dead set in the eyes and Yoongi feels all the air inside of him leave him. 

“You like me a lot, right hyung?” Jimin asks. He looks so determined, so focused that Yoongi is very confused as to why he’s asking this now. 

“I-” 

“I know you said it’s not my problem and that I don’t have to worry about that, but what if I want to? What if I want it to be my problem? What if I want to worry about it too, because I like you too?” 

Yoongi blinks. Once. Twice. A couple of more times for good measure. “You .. you like me?” 

“How could I not?” Jimin breathes out. “You’ve shown me how I am supposed to be treated in the span of only a few days better than my own fiancé.” 

“But Jimin, you’re engaged. You, we just did all of this to find your ring and-” 

“But I don’t want it. I never wanted it, not with him.” Jimin retorts. “You said it yourself, I shouldn’t be treated like that. I don’t want to be treated like that. And maybe I am crazy for doing this, but I don’t care. I’ve done everything for him and his family for years. I can’t do this, I can’t marry, hyung.” 

Yoongi shakes his head, trying desperately to be rational. “Jimin-ah, I am a simple tour guide. I don’t have a beautiful diamond ring to give you. I can’t dine you in five star restaurants and fly you out on the other side of the world at a word’s notice.” 

“And I don’t want that, hyung.” Jimin assures him. “I don’t care about all that. This means nothing. You’ve shown me more by not giving me all of this than he ever has.” 

“Jimin-ah, I..” Jimin is looking at him with such big and wide eyes, full of hope and Yoongi is really trying but, he’s also very much half in love with the man in front of him. “Are you sure about this? Because I like you but-” 

Jimin doesn’t let him finish him. He leans in and kisses Yoongi fully on the mouth, and Yoongi is obviously surprised but he falls into it pretty quickly, because if he can have this, he’ll gladly enjoy this. The kiss is tender, sweet, everything Yoongi had ever imagined kissing would be like and more. Somehow he still tastes like the cotton candy they had earlier, and Yoongi loves that he can taste it, loves that it’s something he knows now. 

Jimin pulls away and nods rapidly. “I am sure.” 

Yoongi is trying to catch his breath. “Yeah?” 

“Never been more sure of anything.” Jimin smiles at him. 

Yoongi smiles right back but he still has one question. “But.. what about your fiancé?” 

“I’ll call him.” Jimin sighs, but the happy glint in his eyes doesn’t die. “Will you hold my hand while I do it?” 

Yoongi nods with a shy smile. “I am here for you.” 

Jimin smiles at him, and he does grab Yoongi’s hand immediately, and Yoongi doesn’t think he’s ever going to get used to this. Holding Jimin’s hand. Because he can now. He’s allowed to now. However complicated that beginning is, he doesn’t mind. As long as Jimin’s hand is in his, he doesn’t mind being tangled in this mighty complicated newly found feeling.