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Vanya was thirteen, and she had barely gotten her violin four months ago. She'd been playing so often, though, that she'd already improved greatly. Yet, her focus on the violin didn't mean she didn't spend time with her brothers.
When she played, it was always the same; Ben lounging on her bed reading, while Five was hunched over the desk, scribbling away in a notebook. She smiled. She loved being in the company of her brothers. Together, she knew she wasn't alone. They made sure of that.
(Until they didn't.)
Vanya was fourteen, staring at her fingers. The blisters on them hurt too much to play, but she couldn't stop playing. After Five left, Ben rarely came in to read when she played. She figured, the more she played, the more likely he was to come and spend time with her. She didn't want to be alone.
(Soon, she would be.)
Vanya was sixteen, staring at the grave of which Ben's body lay. He'd died only a few months prior, and she wasn't used to it. Sure, by then, he rarely ever said hello, or stopped by to spend time with her, but he was the only one who acknowledged her presence. Even a small smile in her direction was enough for her to know, she wasn't alone. She didn't want to think that she was now. She couldn't be. Five would come back soon, he had to.
(He didn't.)
Vanya was twenty-seven, living in an apartment of her own. It was quiet. Always quiet. There was no bickering between Ben and Five, there wasn't the subtle noise of page turning in a book, and there wasn't any frantic scribbling on paper. It was cold. There weren't any post-mission hugs that were so tight you could barely breathe, there wasn't the warmth of laughter from three close friends and siblings, and there weren't any warm smiles sent her way after a night filled with giggling and staying up way too late.
Vanya was alone. She had been for a while, but she never wanted to admit it. Now? It was too hard to ignore everything she missed. Ben was dead, he had been for years. Five was gone, and she had to accept that he wasn't coming back. Vanya was alone, and she had finally accepted that.