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Laying in that human shaped pit, Xie Lian stared numbly towards the sky. Two days have passed and now it is the third day but still, nobody has ever thought of ever helping him. Too busy of thinking how they would have misfortune due to him becoming such a god simply because he had not been able to save his own people. It’s funny how people forget humanity, forget how to be kind and helpful just because they are afraid of getting trouble. Afraid of misfortune. But who wouldn’t right? It’s scary to be in that place after all.
It’s scary to be in a place of the unknown. Only a few people would take a step and enter that door. People who decided to strip themselves from fear and took on the robes of courage. People whose willing to give up their needs and wants just so they could help others in their time of need. Forgetting their own hurts or forgetting themselves in the process. Xie Lian just had to be one of those people. Having the desire to help the common folks.
But even with all this desire of helping and love for the common folks, he wasn’t appreciated. He didn’t even remember one person staying by his side after all the helping he’s done. Don’t get him wrong though. He really wasn’t asking for any compensation for the help he gave. He did it out of love after all and not because he can get something out of it. It’s just that, he needs at least one person. One person to encourage him, one person to tell him he was appreciated. One person who would tell him it’s gonna be okay. Someone who’ll tell him, it’s fine to continue. Continue to be kind and helpful even when he’s not gonna be appreciated. To continue living being somewhat of a pillar to others.
Xie Lian let his thoughts out as he remembered a certain tale her mother told him before sleeping. It had been about a certain man whose like him as well. Maybe not entirely like him. Because if he was here at this time, he can definitely heal all those who had human face disease just by his words. Or if the person would just hold a garment of his robe, they will be healed just like that.
That man Jesus of Nazareth. He said he was the son of God didn’t he? In other words, he’s a God as well. And Xie Lian ultimately liked him. Even though her mother said that it was just a tale, he still wanted to follow his example. Even though his power isn’t great about the healing part, he still wanted to help the people however he can.
That Jesus, is this how he felt as well?Receiving rejection and hate after everything he’s done to help the people? After he healed their sick and raise people from the dead? Even one of his disciples denied him when he was arrested due to the betrayal of another disciple of him. What was his name again? Wudas? Hudas? Lucas? No. Maybe it was Judas.
Feeling a little better, Xie Lian chuckled under his breath saying out loud, “ Hey Jesus. I know my mom said that you were just a tale. But I kinda refuse to believe that I think. It was said that you ascended to heaven… surely you’re out there in the highest heavens? I don’t think the heavens I’ve ascended is where you ascended. So maybe, you’re in the highest part right? You just have so many words of wisdom while you’re here on earth. If you’re here right now, what would you have said to me? Would you tell me, “ Xie Lian, they hated me before they hated you. They rejected me before they rejected you. They hated you because you are my disciple? “ Xie Lian laughed at his own words wondering if he got Jesus’ lines properly.
“ Maybe that’s what I am huh. One of your disciple. Because you said that if one follows your examples, they are your disciples and become adopted into the family of your father….” Feeling a sob wanting to get out of his throat, Xie Lian continued to say as tears flowed from his eyes. “ But I’m so tired. *Sniffs* I’m so tired. I just want, please. I need a sign. I need a sign. A sign to tell me you want me to go on living this life I’ve chosen to live even as a teenager. Just to know that I’m not living without a purpose. That my life isn’t for nothing. That I can go through this trial no matter how difficult the process maybe….”
He says, as tears continued to flow from his eyes. But there was nothing else that happened. He can only hear the cries of his heart and he felt like he was tearing apart.
Suddenly, drizzling rain begun falling from the sky. Xie Lian can vaguely hear the people around running to and fro. Maybe they were packing to save themselves from the rain. And he will be left here drenched in the falling rain and Oh. The devil incarnate aka White No Face is here again. Just great. He thought sarcastically.
Said devil started to taunt him with his words again. It’s funny how this thing wants him to become the devil that he was. But unfortunately for him, he’d rather kill himself than to ever consider coming to this devil’s side.
There it is again the famous “ Nobody would be willing to help you. “
He knows that already alright. He knows that more than anyone. But it’s still none of this creatures sh*tty business!
Feeling good about himself, White No Face continually said. “ But it’s alright. They won’t help you. But I will help you. “
‘ Help me? Help me become a devil, lunatic like you? Thanks but no thanks’ even though he thought this, he still let White No Face pull out the sword from his heart and the latter throw it away beside him. His tired after all. He just wants this creature to leave him at once. And leaving, he did.
Xie Lian felt the pain in his wounds after the sword was out. This was the only thing that he felt for the moment. Maybe this was his fate after all. To feel pain and agony for the rest of his life. With this thought, Xie Lian was back to being numb and stopped hoping. Stopped hoping for anything at all.
SPLASH, SPLOOSH, SPLASH, SPLOOSH, the sound of a series of wild footsteps stomping on water came as if one was coming towards where Xie Lian currently is. However Xie Lian already stopped hoping and decided to ignore the footsteps. He sat up slowly and just as he did, he heard a sudden “AHH” followed by something crushing onto him.
The thing that crushed onto him was a man carrying a sack of rice evident by the spilled grain on the pit they are in. He was also carrying a bamboo hat that had flown off to somewhere quite far after he fell heavily. “ WHAT THE F*CK!!!” the man said and started screaming out his frustrations and profanities were thrown at Xie Lian as the man grabbed his collar and shake him back and forth as if he was like a doll seemingly lifeless in the man's hands. “ I worked so hard just to get that sack of rice for my family to have something to eat and yet you just have to be here and ruin everything!!! What the f*CK!!! “
He continued to let go of his frustrations telling Xie Lian to pay him back for it but Xie Lian completely ignored him letting him do what he wants. “ HOW DARE YOU IGNORE ME!! IM TALKING TO YOU!! ARE YOU ASKING FOR YOUR DEATH HUH?! “
“Yes. “ Xie Lian replied coldly.
“ WELL IF YOU WANT TO DIE SO BADLY, DO IT SOMEWHERE ELSE! YOU JUST REALLY HAVE TO DO THIS IN HERE AND BLOCK PEOPLES WAY!! WhAT A NUISANCE!! “ he says continually as he shook Xie Lian more wildly than before.
Cuss. Cuss all you want. It doesn’t matter anymore. Either way, everything will soon disappear. He’ll stop caring for people. Stop expecting so much from people. And live a life without common folks to worry about. The sun is about to set. The human face disease will be unleashed once more.
The man, after gripping and shaking and cussing Xie Lian to his hearts content and receiving no response from him, he decided to push Xie Lian away back to the pit and reached out for his bamboo hat going away grumbling under his breath.
Xie Lian was thrown away with a dull thud and he heard a clamouring noise louder than the sound of the rain. It was the shrieking of millions of souls of the dead sealed within the black sword. They started wailing and shrieking like mad inside Xie Lian’s head, cheering and rejoicing at the coming arrival of their freedom and revenge.
Xie Lian raised a hand and covered his face. Just as he was shakily reaching out for the black sword on the ground, he suddenly noticed that it stopped raining.
No.
That’s not right.
The rain did not stop. It was more like something was hovered above his head blocking the rain from falling on his already drenched state. Xie Lian whipped his head up to look and saw someone crouched before him pressing that bamboo hat that was once on his own head, on Xie Lian’s head. Turns out it was the same man who he thought already left after shaking him and cussing him over his sack of rice that was spilled.
He glared at the other and the other glared at him as well saying, “ What are you looking at me like that for? What? It was just some cussin' and you really wanna go die over it? “ He spat on the ground as he said “ Looking so miserable like you’re crying for the dead, how unlucky! “
“….”
That man earlier was so aggressive but now he seemed to looked guilty evident from the way he says, “ Alright. Alright. It was my bad earlier. But you deserved all that scolding! Who told you to go mental? Besides, who was never cussed at before?”
Xie Lian’s eyes widened shocked at the man’s words.
Then, that man grew impatient and said “ Fine fine. It was my bad luck today you don’t have to pay for it. What are you still doing there lying on the ground? You’re a grown man now not a toddler! Are you waiting for ma or pa to pick you up? Get up get up get up! “
He said as he urged and pulled, yanking Xie Lian to get up from the ground. The man forcefully slapped his back twice and said” Stand up! Go home now. “
And just like that, Xie Lian was pulled out of this human shaped pit he was in, almost tumbling out in the process when he was slapped on the back twice. And before he can process what just happened, the man was gone.
The only thing left was that bamboo hat on his head reminding Xie Lian that someone actually pulled him out of that pit. He wasn’t dreaming about it or even hallucinating.
After for what seemed like forever, Xie Lian smiled thinking that he can hope again. The man raised his head above and saw the disaster coming. But unlike his first motive of doing something evil, he decided that he will continue to protect and save people at all cost. Whether he be appreciated or not. Be helped in return or not. He will help people. Whether a thousand, a hundred or ten or even just one.
