Chapter Text
The soft snow crunched underfoot as I stumbled through the trees that loomed tall above. The sun was setting fast, surely technos house was through here? I know my memory is horrendous but I used to live there. I wouldn't forget would i? I forget too much. Why can't I remember?
Focus
I go to technos house...and...and…
What was I going to do?
Oh that's right, go to technos and ask for help. I don't know how much longer I can cope with the voice. I’m scared I'm going to hurt Michael or Tubbo before I can stop myself. This dreamon within me just won't get out.
Hurt them. Make them feel pain. You are a horrible person Ranboo, show them you mean harm
I don't want to hurt them. Please leave me alone. I haven't done anything.
Watch them writhe in pain before you ranboo, look at what you could do.
A brief image flashes into vision, a mangled mess of bodies; my family's bodies. Please I don't want to hurt them. I don't want to hurt them. I don't want to hurt them
I don't want to hurt them
The voice gets louder, until all I can hear is his voice and all I can see is darkness.
“Techno….help…”
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I rise early every morning, to try and combat some mobs before they all burn away in the early sunlight. Calms the voices. I need to get some wood too; Philza managed to make an automatic farm, but needs more wood to make another.
I pickup my sword and axe before leaving the cottage and advancing towards the trees in the distance. It is a very cold morning - suggesting the night had been even colder. I can’t imagine what would happen to someone stuck out here.
I reach the edge of the woods and begin chopping down trees, every now and then fighting some of the mobs. I decide to move further into the woods, there's a clearing up ahead where mobs like to gather. Easy way to get xp, and the voices are very loud today. I have no clue why.
I enter and there are several endermen, all crowded around something. They hear me and turn, but back away when they see me as though to let me pass. On the ground is a small pile. If i were not mistaken it looks like a bunch of old clothes. But it moves in time with my heartbeat, very short breaths but breaths nonetheless. By the looks of it, it's a kid of some form.
I crouch down next to it and move the shirt covering them away from their face.
“Ranboo?”
I inhale sharply. Why is he here? His skin is cold to touch - no wonder. After all, he's not really suited to cold weather. But why is he here? Why now? He must've been there all night. It was so cold. The lighter parts of his skin are turning blue, and there are burn marks down his face.
I turn around to see if the endermen have stayed, but they're nowhere to be found. Understandable though; i'm not sure if they have ever seen someone like boo before.
I sheath my sword and stand up. Ranboo is tall but lanky. And carrying him is easier than carrying Tommy when he was younger. I move back towards the house, and push the wooden door open with my foot. I trudge through the door. I decided that the best place to lay him is in the armchair by the fire. As I lay him down, he stirs but doesn't wake. I remove his jacket and wrap my cape around him instead and proceed to light the fire - letting the warmth of it grow throughout the room. Hopefully he will warm up.
I still can't work out why he was so nearby. Why would he try to get here, of all places I thought he would rather visit Dream than come here again. I move to the stove and heat some milk and shove some potatoes in the furnace. While they heat I listen to the soft breathing as his breaths become less laboured and more comfortable.
Please ranboo...why?
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The air around me is warm, and a heavy hand rests on my shoulder. I try to move but a voice speaks out.
“Hey ranboo, don't try and move much, you’ll hurt yourself.””
Wha-what? Where am i. I open my eyes and see the faint glow of a fire - technos fire?
I sit up suddenly; breathing heavily.
“Techno? How...how did...what?”
“Hey man, in all honestly I'm just as confused as you are. Here, drink this”
He passes a cup of warm milk towards my shaky hands, but not letting go.
“I can hold it tech, don’t worry.” I say hastily, pulling away and taking a sip. It coats my mouth and I suddenly feel a lot warmer.
Techno sits in front of me and begins to explain. It makes sense I guess. The last thing I remember is hearing dreams voice then just… darkness.
“so , Mr boo, why did you try and come here”
I guess it's time to explain.
“I hear voices,” I begin and Techno raises an eyebrow, “ Well one voice really, it sounds like dream and he tells me i've been doing things that I don't remember doing, like blowing up the community house and taking sides and hurting people. Tubbo says I've been distant. The voice says he's trying to hurt me and I need to kill him and Michael before they hurt me. He’s so loud techno… i just…”
“Hey, slow down, take your time, it's ok I am here for you. Thank you for trusting me. Now did you say it was Dream? I didn't think you’d ever spoken to him.”
“No not at all, that's what makes it weirder. I know it sounds like dream but surely it can't be him. He can't do that can he?”
“I'm not sure. That goddamn green bitch is a man of many surprises - you know what he did to Tommy.”
I nod and bow my head.
Why did I let that happen to him?
His arm moves back over my shoulder. He knows what I want to say.
“You were not the cause of this Ranboo. It was nobody's fault but Dreams - you got me?”
He didn’t need a response, so instead turns and moves towards the door, picking up a spare cape.
“Feel free to make yourself at home, if Phil comes over, tell him I'm letting you stay here for a few days, he always understands. I’m going to the Prison.”
I smile weakly and bury my face into the fur in his jacket.
Techno will sort it out - he always does….im safe here. Right?
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My sword swings lightly by my side as I see Pandora's box looming in the distance.
Protect the kid. He needs you.
That's the last time I let that green son-of-a-bitch near my family.
As I enter, Sam smiles at the arrival of a new person, but frowns when he realises who has come to greet him.
“What do you want Techno, you know I can't let you in there.”
“Sam, you can take all my stuff, just let me in there with him, for five minutes.”
“Why techno? You helped him blow up l’manburg. Why should you, of all people, be let near him? Give me one good reason.”
I hesitate, “He hurt Ranboo; in ways you couldn’t possibly imagine. And it's continuing even though Dream is here. I need to tell him to leave Ranboo alone before he hurts someone - badly.”
Sam raises an eyebrow and exhales before nodding.
“You'll have to go through all the safety precautions, and sign the waiver…”
“Yes I will, don't worry about that.”
I let Sam lead me through the safety chambers as he spoke delicately about the manufacturing and blueprints to the prison. It’s very boring. Why go on about how to get into the prison, without telling me how you can get out?
After the full process of emptying my inventory and giving up the axe of peace, I sign the waivers and enter onto the moving platform before the cell. The lava drops and I begin to walk with it. As I reach the obsidian, Dream turns to face me and smiles.
We both wait for the lava to drop before talking.
“Oh techno, my old friend, you're here for that favour I'm sure.”
“Favour? Oh I'm not here for that favour, I’m here to ask you why you think it's funny to manipulate kids for your own pleasure.”
Dreams smile contorts into a smirk, “I have absolutely no idea what you could mean. I’ve been here the entire time…”
“You know what you're doing, and you know the result it's having on Ranboo. Just stop this bullshit,” I interrupt and back him into the wall, “Either you stop, and let him live his life, or your favour will be me stopping myself from crushing Puffy’s head between my hands.”
That hit a soft spot. His attachments for George would’ve been the obvious choice. But they’re not as close any more. However, Puffy is still worth a lot to him.
“You wouldn’t.”
“Sure I would. I would sit and watch until the very light in her eyes went out.”
I wouldn’t hurt Puffy of course. But it’ll work as leverage, “so Dream, is that a deal?”
He shuffles from foot to foot, tears forming in the corners of his eyes as he nods slightly.
“Well...guess my work here is done isn't it Dream?”
I turn to leave, and a fist hits hard into the middle of my back. All breath left completely knocked.
What the fuck?
Dreams face is one of pure anger as he hits again, this time towards my face. I grab his arm and twist it behind his back before throwing him onto the floor. He groans before skulking back into the corner; holding his arm weakly.
Hah little homeless bitch
“Sam?” I call, “Ready to leave now.”
Within seconds the lava drops once more and I proceed back along the pathway.
Sam seems intrigued as to what happened there; he wouldn't stop asking questions.
I ignored him and kept quiet until thanking him for the visit whilst picking up my things before leaving.
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I’ve begun to warm up more and become accustomed to my surroundings...
Even though I’m still sure how I got here.
My memory is always hazy, full of uncertainty. But... I remember leaving Snowchester with some intention of coming here. Maybe I am just going crazy.
Yes.
That makes sense. The half black half white freak going crazy.
I don't want to be known as a freak. Who would? But those words have been drilled into me, stayed with me like some cloud of dread; a reminder of who I am.
Techno couldn’t have gone for more than two hours, yet I kept gazing at the door, expecting someone else to come to the door, and tell me that he’d died trying to protect me. For someone to tell me that once again I'd been the fault of a loved one's demise.
When he does return, I wrap my arms around him. Although my height made that slightly difficult.
Thank fuck, he’s alive.
I don't know what I expected - he is a near god. I think I scared him slightly. He took a step back before placing his arm back around me too.
“Hey, be careful! You don't want to hurt yourself.” He said, smiling but with a tone of seriousness.
“I know, i know,” I reply, “uh, what did you do to Dream.”
“You have no reason to worry about him anymore. I sorted him out.
Wait what. “You killed him? Techno no don't tell me you killed him,” My breath became shallow, “no please Sam will kill you, and then ill be responsible for someone dying again. Please techno, I can't take that.” I can't hear anything over the sound of my heavy breathing. I can't tell if I'm yelling or whispering. There’s too much noise.
I feel my weight drop to the floor as I begin to sob, and a second weight drops beside me, wrapping arms around me, pulling me closer as the room starts spinning.
I have no clue why I wouldn't want him dead.
Surely I do?
He...he.
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.
I don't know.
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It took a while to calm Ranboo down again. I can't think why he wouldn’t want Dream dead. Manipulation can do strange things. Surprisingly - I know that all too well.
Phil returned in the early hours of this morning. At this time I’d managed to convince Ranboo that Dream wasn’t dead.
Now standing out the front of the cottage, feeding Carl, I get some time to think.
There are too many questions left without answers around that kid.
Where’s and why’s swirl around like the same snowflakes falling beside me.
Eeeeeeeeee
Why? Why now? When I'd actually like to clear my head to think.
We know more than you do
Well. Tell me something I don't know.
Keep him safe
Fine. Don’t tell me. Guess I'll just work with what I've got.
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Phil came to visit, and Techno’s gone outside for a bit. I can’t help but feel bad for bothering them both...after all this time. They’ve done so much for me since L’manburg. I owe them an unpayable debt.
Phil didn’t need any explanation though; he never does… he always just…
Understands. I wish more people were like that.
When I left, a note was rushed for Tubbo, to tell him why I'd fled. I told him not to come looking for me. It’s still hazy whether i actually wrote it; let alone what i wrote.
Maybe things will be better. Things will be better. They have to be.
I’m not sure what Techno did. But he said he didn’t kill Dream, and I guess that’s something to believe then.
Both Phil and Techno said to leave when I feel comfortable to do so; and that it’s completely fine if that is days or months.
Tubbo will start looking for me soon enough and how do I explain that I'm here, with the people that blew up his country?
I’m not sure; I never thought I'd have to deal with that.
Regardless, i'm safe here now...and that's what matters most. The voice of my knowledge is gone, and I can breathe freely. That’s important isn’t it?
Yes.
I am ok.
I am certain of who I am.
Are you really, Ranboo?