Chapter Text
Kim tapped her fingers on her thigh as she thought about the events that led her to this moment. Maybe it was becoming friends with Aubrey. Maybe it happened when Sunny emerged from his house for three days before he moved. Maybe it was the events afterwards. Actually, on second thought, that last one sounded more likely, especially now.
Sunny: Are you free to meet up tomorrow? I have a few things I’d like to get off my chest and I’d rather you be the first to hear them.
Kim raised a brow. Not at the prospect of Sunny wanting to talk. Ever since their encounter back at the start of Spring Break, the two have made a small deal. Whenever Sunny visits Faraway, the two would find the time to meet up at the hideout and talk to each other, be it by venting or casual conversation. When they weren’t doing that and/or Sunny was at his place at the city, the two would text each other, usually about dumb shit they find or to get a quick update on the other.
She didn’t raise a brow at the idea of Sunny wanting to wait till tomorrow to talk either. First reason being that it’s night time and apparently Kel knows all of Sunny’s tricks for sneaking out at night, so a nighttime chat was out of the question. Second reason being that he came to Faraway for Aubrey’s birthday and that it had just passed, with only an hour left until midnight. Kim knew that he wanted to be in high spirits for the day, so she understood why he wanted to wait.
No, the reason, well reasons, that Kim raised a brow at the text was, a). Sunny wanted Kim to be the first one to hear what he had to say. b). Same as the first reason, but more so about the funny feeling she had in her chest because of that. It wasn’t worry, since she knew very well what that felt like when Aubrey tried to pull a Sunny that one day. No, this feeling was warm and slightly fuzzy. The last time she had that feeling, Kim tried to ask out Aubrey. Why she was getting that feeling with Sunny, she didn’t know. With a sigh, Kim responded.
Kim: Im game no gino’s tho cuz the others will be there tomorrow
Kim: Ill just say i have to be elsewhere and skip out on it
Kim: Vance and aubs will be the most curious but i have my ways to get them both off my case
I’ll just say it’s personal shit. Kim thought to herself as she placed her phone on her nightstand, only for it buzz just shortly afterwards. Wow...He never responds that fast. Kim grabbed the phone and looked at the message.
Sunny: Thank you! That means a lot to me! And I don’t mind forgoing Gino’s. Honestly, I’d be better without it this time. See you at the hideout!
Okay, now Kim was worried. She quickly typed a response and set the phone back on the nightstand. She sighed and laid on her bed, staring up into the ceiling. Her mind kept going through different scenarios regarding the upcoming session, which kept her up for a good portion of the night. The next day, Kim and Vance were making their way out of the house. “Oh, by the way Vance.” Kim turned to her older brother. “I don’t think I’ll be able to make it to Gino’s today, at least not till later.”
Vance raised a brow. “Ok...Any reason why?”
“Something personal I need to take care of.” Kim responded curtly. “Which is what I’m expecting you to tell Aubs and the others.”
Vance hummed and nodded. “Alright, but you know how Aubrey is.”
Kim sighed and opened the front door. “Yeah, I know. I’m gonna get a head start so see ya later.” She waved Vance goodbye and left the house, making her way up to the park and into the hideout. The part she hated the most about heading to the lake was all the branches and bushes that were in the way. Some of the leaves and sticks would stick to her hoodie and whenever she went by scooter the forest between the lake and the park would trip her up at times. Still, the torment was worth it. The lake was nice and peaceful. A good getaway from the stress of everyday life.
Once the lake came into view, Kim found that Sunny had managed to beat her to the lake, as he was currently skipping rocks into it. Kim will admit, Sunny moving to the city did do him one favor. It gave him a better sense of fashion, though it was still lacking somewhat since he stuck to a monochrome color pallet. Sunny must’ve felt particularly emo today, since he was wearing a black shirt over a long sleeved dress shirt, black pants with a chain hanging from the large belt and black shoes. Overall, just a lot of black.
Kim walked up behind Sunny and tapped his head with her knuckles. “How’s it going?”
Sunny looked up at Kim briefly and shrugged, turning back to the lake to skip another rock. “I’ve been better. Which is saying a lot since I was fine yesterday.”
Kim hummed and sat down next to Sunny, getting a better look at the front of the shirt, which had some surreal image of himself lifting his face away from his head as a chunk of void with eyes took it’s place. Kim raised a brow and pointed at the shirt. “What’s, uh...All that about?”
Sunny looked down at his shirt and hummed. “Well, I’m in this graphic design class and one of the assignments was to make a shirt design…” He rubbed his neck. “The, uh, design was one I drew when I was having a bad day and I was having another one when we got the assignment, so I traced it in the program we needed to use and...Yeah.”
Kim raised a brow. “So you put your vent art on a shirt?” She chuckled. “Wow, I wouldn’t have expected you to be brave enough to showcase something like that!”
Sunny’s face flushed pink as he let out a chuckle of his own. “Well…” He turned to Kim. “I think I mainly did it out of impulse. If I had thought about it more, the shirt would be different, I can guarantee that.”
“No shit.” Kim rolled her eyes and lightly tapped her fist against Sunny’s arm. “It’s not bad, just a little bizarre to look at, which is what stuff like that is supposed to do.”
“Yeah, I guess…” Sunny rubbed his neck.
“One nitpick though.” Kim gestured her arm to Sunny. “Don’t wear so much black next time. You go walking around at night everyone'll think you went missing.”
Sunny laughed. “Alright, I deserve that one! I guess I just felt extra today, for some reason.”
“Oh, that’s why?” Kim chuckled to herself. “And here I was, thinking that you were wearing all black because of what you wanted to talk about!”
Sunny scratched his cheek, the color pink returning to his face. “No...I didn’t, but I suppose now would be a good time to get to why we’re here, huh?”
Kim hummed. “Yeah, we should get to that.”
“Yeah.” Sunny sighed and turned to the lake, resting his head on his hand while his arm was propped against his knee. “Last night, Kel mentioned how all of us had four years of birthdays we had to catch up on. It made me think about what I was doing inside my house during that period of time.”
“And what were you doing?” Kim asked. “I’m going to be honest, I’ve been curious about that since Aubs told us about it.”
“It...All of it blended together, honestly. Mostly because I was asleep for most of it, but what I did when I was awake wasn't all that either.”
“Asleep? For how long?”
Sunny hummed. “Well, mostly around fourteen hours or so but on a rare occasion I would sleep through the entire day, sometimes multiple.”
Kim could practically feel her jaw drop to the ground, even if her mouth was just partially opened in shock. “Dude, that is...Extremely unhealthy for you.”
“No kidding, I could barely walk at times.” Sunny tapped his fingers on his thigh. “Although, the fact that I slept at all is an achievement itself.” He looked at Kim, who wore a questioning look. He gulped and looked back at the lake. “Before I could really escape into my dreams, nightmares were pretty frequent. Even after I had more control over what I dreamt, they’d still sneak up on me. Not only that, but…” He took a fistful of grass and pulled harshly on it, ripping them out of the ground. “Before I could even think of retreating into my dreams...I had to deal with Sleep Paralysis.”
Kim went wide eyed. “Holy shit…”
Sunny nodded. “Every night. For four years. Even during that brief period while I still went to school before I ruined Basil’s Photo Album.” He took a choked breath. “You know how, with Sleep Paralysis, you would apparently see a demon?” Kim nodded her head. “Well, what I saw was...Mari except...Her arms and legs were gone, so she was just, floating around in a blinding white dress. Her eyes were nothing but a hollow space and...Her neck was crooked beyond belief, with her mouth open wide enough that it might as well have been a part of her neck.”
Kim felt a shiver crawl up her spine at the description. “Jesus Christ on a bike! You had to deal with that for four years!?” Sunny nodded. Kim stared at him for a minute, her face riddled with worry and concern. “Damn...I…” She rubbed her neck. “Y’know...Aubs would always go on about how you guys abandoned her and all, but hearing that...Geez, it’s starting to sound like she was the asshole of the situation.”
“None of us were innocent.” Sunny muttered. “Hero, instead of trying to bring everyone together and comfort us, did what I did for about a year, breaking out of that state just to scream at Kel for trying to care about him, which led to Hero doing nothing but study afterwards. I know for a fact that Basil was trying to distance himself from everyone to a degree and, well, you know how Aubrey turned out.” Kim nodded. “And...Contrary to popular belief, Kel isn’t all sunshine and rainbows either. Despite making new friends and putting his time and effort into sports, he kept his head in the past at times, only showing his maturity in certain situations like getting that Jesse kid to finally speak to his dad. Not to mention, Hero got most of the positive attention from their parents, with their dad being just a little more considerate to Kel.”
Kim hummed while Sunny picked up a rock and skipped it across the lake. “Okay, I see your point. Everyone in your group has a small part of the blame to take.”
Sunny sighed and nodded. “Honestly, sometimes I wonder if our group splitting apart was always going to happen, whether Mari lived or not. Even if she lived and we had done the recital, she would’ve been off to college after a few years with Hero, leaving me, Kel, Aubrey and Basil on our own.” He lied down on his back. “I don’t think we would’ve lasted. All it would really take would be for Kel and Aubrey to have one small face off for everything to fall apart. I’m sure of it.”
“You don’t really think it’d fall apart that easily, do you?”
Sunny shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe? Hero would always break up their arguments before they could escalate any further, so without him all it would probably take is another war on whether peanut butter or jelly was better than the other.”
Kim raised a brow. “Wait, did that actually happen?”
“Yep. Honestly, it was kind of entertaining to watch. I even considered bringing up the argument of whether or not a hot dog was a sandwich.”
“Oh dear god, I don’t think there’d be stopping that one!” Kim let out a hearty laugh.
Sunny let out a small chuckle alongside her. “No, I don’t think so, either.” He sighed and placed his arm beneath his head as a cushion. “Still, dead or not, Mari leaving the group would have always made a negative impact. It’s just...The severity of it depended on how and since she died...It was a really severe impact.” Sunny bit his lip. “Y’know, the more I thought about it, me and Aubrey had something in common when it came to those four years.”
“And what was that?”
Sunny sat back up and kept his gaze locked onto the grass. “Both of us waited for...Someone in our group to come to us. Except, instead of wanting to be ‘saved’ or something like Aubrey, with me...I just wanted to know if…” Kim waited patiently while Sunny drew in a choked breath. “After one of our practices for the recital, I started thinking to myself, ‘What if the only reason the others hang out with me is...Because of Mari? Because I’m her brother?’” Sunny wiped his eye. “That thought stuck with me after she died and...Even after I blocked out the event that caused her death, that thought was always there. I figured that, if one of them came to me, asking me to come out of the house. That if I was okay, then...That thought would be proven wrong.”
“But it didn’t happen.” Kim muttered. “At least, not till Kel knocked on your door that one day.”
Sunny shook his head. “Not until that day. None of them came by. I understood why Basil didn’t, but with the others...It felt like my suspicions were confirmed. Even if I forgot what happened to Mari, I knew she was gone in some way. And since nobody was trying to check up on me...I started to wonder why I even bothered to even wait for them. Why I bothered to think they’d care for me, when they only cared about Mari. With that in my mind, I figured, if they didn’t care about me, then they wouldn’t care if I…”
Sunny rubbed his wrist, causing Kim to freeze up. “Are you saying you-”
“I thought about it.” Sunny admitted. “My thought process during that time was ‘If they didn't care about me enough to try and check up on me, then they wouldn't care if I hurt myself.’” Sunny started to tear up. “So, on several occasions, I would walk into the bathroom with that knife in hand and hold it up to my wrists…” He took a deep breath. “I never went through it though. I’d hold it up to my wrist for a minute or two and then leave with nothing bad happening. The closest I got was being able to feel the metal on my skin, but I never had the guts to…” Sunny’s breath hitched as he began to slowly sob, covering his only eye with his palm as he hiccupped.
Kim watched on as Sunny’s sobbing became worse. She pursed her lips, bringing her palm up to her head as she sighed. God damnit, how did this dude even…? She looked back up at Sunny and grit her teeth, the feeling of worry growing more and more as he continued to sob. I...Damnit, I don’t want to see him like this! Kim scooted herself closer to Sunny and pulled him closer to her. She rested one hand on his head as he dropped it into the crook of her neck, while she used her other one to rub circles into his back.
“It’s okay, Sunny. It’s okay. Just let it out.” Kim whispered as Sunny continued sobbing into her hoodie. She’d have to wash it later, but that’s life. She gently started to run her fingers through Sunny’s hair in an attempt to further comfort him and found that his hair was really soft, almost fur-like. It kind of reminded her of petting a cat. Sunny’s sobs began to die down, the raven haired boy now clinging onto Kim’s hoodie like a lifeline. The side shaven girl stopped rubbing circles into the boy’s back, content with just holding him to give him comfort.
Eventually, the last sounds to escape Sunny were a few final sniffles before he had calmed down. Kim had written that off as a successful mission, but didn’t let go of Sunny, nor did he let go of her. She leaned her head closer to Sunny’s, her face starting to burn red as she did so. Kim could imagine how this would look to the others, both the Hooligans and Sunny’s friends if they saw the two like this. Kimberly Myung, the hotheaded, second in command of the Hooligans, A.K.A. The Scooter Gang, cradling Sunny Suzuki, previously designated as That Weird Knife Kid, in her arms gently in a moment of weakness. This would definitely kill her reputation as the others, mainly Kel and Aubrey, would tease her about it.
Kim was brought out of her thoughts when she felt Sunny slightly nuzzle his hair into her cheek, causing her face to burn red further. That warm, fuzzy feeling came back to her, ever so slightly stronger than it did when she tried to ask Aubrey out. She definitely never imagined that ever happening, but there it was. The longer the two held on to each other, the less worried Kim grew about her reputation. At that moment, it could go screw itself.
Kim felt herself lean towards her side as the bus lurched to a stop. She and a few others got up and began making their way out of the bus, stepping onto the concrete beyond it. She stepped a few feet away from the bus before she took the opportunity to scope her surroundings. Just a few feet away from where she was stood a building with several terminals and benches scattered about with some of the people on those benches leaving their spot and stepping into the bus behind her. A road laid behind said building, with a sea of cars blocking out any sight of the asphalt below.
Buildings made of varying types of stone were huddled close together, with skyscrapers piercing the clouds in the distance. Kim took a deep breath, only to be met with the stale scent of stone and the burning sensation of asphalt being scarred by rubber. She winced and shook her head. “How does Sunny deal with all of this?” She sighed and walked further towards the building nearby. Kim’s first experience in the city was about to begin.