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“Good morning.” Tony yawned as he clutched his emotional support coffee.
“Good morning!” Steve said, chipper as always. He flipped a pancake in a pan. Then he glanced over his shoulder to look at Tony, but then he frowned. “Why aren’t you dressed?”
It was then that Tony noticed Steve’s tuxedo and the faint smell of cologne. Hadn’t he just worn a pair of sweatpants and his Shield shirt?
“Dressed?” Tony looked down at himself, only to find that he was suddenly in a tux as well. Weird… He scratched his goatee.
“That’s better.” Steve smiled at him and presented him a plate with a fresh stack of chocolate chip pancakes. “Here ya go, sweetheart. Eat up, it’s an important day.”
“Important day?” Tony wondered out loud when he took the first fork full of sweet sin.
“Oh, sweetheart, I can’t wait. This is going to be the best day of my life.” Steve leaned down and kissed him on the forehead before he turned around to the door that led to the hallway.
“Yeah, Tony, we’re all so excited!” Clint suddenly piped up from where he was sitting cross-legged on the fridge. He was wearing a purple tuxedo and a pair of sunglasses that screamed 80s pop.
“Don’t fuck it up, Stark. You know how important this is to Steve.” Natasha nodded along, suddenly materializing out of thin air next to him.
Tony almost choked on his pancakes. Where had the Agents C and N appeared from suddenly? And what were they talking about? But before he could open his mouth to voice that question, Steve was back, taking the empty plate from him and putting it in the dishwasher. Tony couldn’t even remember eating half of his pancakes. He was still hungry. His stomach felt like an empty cave.
“It’s time, sweetheart. Let’s go. I wouldn’t want to be too late for the big occasion. What do you think of my tux? Does it suit me?” Steve tugged on his lapels and turned around to show off how great the tux suited him.
Steve looked amazing, no question, but something felt off. The black fabric was beautiful, but Tony thought it looked a bit like he was on his way to a funeral. Tony blinked. Maybe something lighter would be-
“I love the light blue. It looks so fresh. You really have an eye for fashion, sweetheart.” Steve sweeped him up in a tight embrace and kissed his nose. Tony hummed something that could vaguely be interpreted as Sure, darling . A little dazed and confused Tony patted his back. What was going on here?
“But now we have to hurry up! Bruce is already waiting in the car for us! Come, sweetheart, I’m so excited to hear you speak!” Steve was already pulling him along to the door, grinning broadly.
Tony wanted to protest, to maybe ask where exactly they were going, but when he turned to look if Clint and Natasha were following them, he found the kitchen empty. With Steve holding his hand he closed the door behind him and suddenly found himself in the back of the black BMW that he had rented for today, because today was… today was… Today was what?
Bruce grinned at him from the front and he was wearing a green tux. “Let’s go, lovebirds! The whole team is already waiting for you, sleepyheads!”
“Wait, where are we going? I don- I’m not even wearing shoes?” Tony started and looked outside where he saw beach goers in bikinis under the Eiffel Tower and a few horses. “Steve, what in God’s name is going on here?”
“No one is going anywhere, darling, especially not you without shoes.” Steve leaned into his side with his handsome smile on his stupidly handsome lips and laid his dress shoes in his lap. “Come on, we’re almost there! I asked JARVIS to record everything. I hope that’s okay. I want to be able to listen to you again and again. This will be phenomenal. I love you so much.”
“I love you too, darling, but I still want to know where we are headed? I get the feeling I’m forgetting something, but I don’t know what…” Tony was getting more nervous by the minute. He slipped his dress shoes on and realized that he was wearing two different socks. And he hadn’t brushed his teeth before they’d left the house!
“Oh dear, don’t joke like that, you’re making me all nervous! Don’t you always say that you have the memory of an elephant? Come one, we’re here!” Steve slipped his hand in Tony’s and pulled him out of the car.
They were standing on the beach near his Malibu mansion and the sun was about to set. Tony let his gaze wander over the scenery and the pit in his stomach became even deeper if that was even possible. His hunger was replaced by panic when he saw the guests in front of them. The whole beach was filled with people. Members from the various superhero teams, Shield agents, Stark Industries staff, children that he didn’t recognize but looked eerily familiar, and even some of his Iron Man armors wearing tuxedos, including the Mark I. The weirdest guests were probably the bean shaped critters, that looked like Iron Man and Captain America guinea pigs without fur.
Tony grabbed Steve’s arm when he spotted the Red Skull in a dress and a yellow wig in the back of the crowd. “Steve! Steve, what- there’s the Red Skull! He- how in God’s name-!”
“What are you talking about, Tony?” Steve followed his gaze and waved at the Hydra leader with a smile, who returned the friendly gesture. “That’s Deborah.”
Tony stumbled when Steve pulled him forward and they made their way through the crowd, down the aisle that led them to the front, where Thor was waiting with a book written in a language that was definitely not from earth. They came to a halt in front of him and he looked expectantly at them. Steve took his hands in his and looked at him as well, just as expectantly as Thor.
The stars were shining above their heads, and in the distance Tony could hear the wind and the waves and the rustling and shuffling of the guests that seemed to wait for something. But everything sounded dull and muffled somehow. Tony couldn’t hear what they were saying. Maybe it was just his own blood rushing through his ears.
An old man with a huge walrus moustache and big black sunglasses came up to them and waved a green sweater like it was a flag. Behind him he saw his own father coming up to them as well, holding something that looked suspiciously like a pillow with rings…
“Steve! Where are we? What’s going on? Are we- are we about to get married? This is not funny Steve!” Tony hissed at him and his panic rose in his chest.
“Oh, Tony, I love it when you're pretending that you don’t know what’s going on.” Steve just smiled at him again and Tony was seriously considering punching him because something was clearly wrong here!
“Anthony?” Thor interrupted his spiraling thoughts. “It is time, my friend.”
“Time for what?” He repeated dumbly.
“To hear it! Your vow. You prepared a whole speech, didn’t you? We are all looking forward to it!” Steve grinned and looked at him with sparkles in his eyes that could rival those anime eyes that Tony knew from a trip to Japan.
“I did? Did I? I mean, I did, yeah, no, I didn’t? Didn’t I?” Tony stared at him with his mouth open and his voice lost.
Thor and Steve, the weird old man and his father just stared at him intently, when suddenly the whole gathered crowd started chanting “Vow! Vow! Vow!”
That was the moment when Tony realized that he had indeed prepared a whole emotional speech, complete with pictures, tales of how they met, and a heartfelt love declaration. But, for fucks sake, he couldn’t remember a single word from it.
His tongue was glued to the roof of his mouth, his lips wouldn’t open and he felt as if he was suddenly mute. Cold sweat was coating his forehead and he felt it run down his spine. Steve’s eyes became bigger and bigger, the crowd became even louder and the scrutinising gaze of his father became even more intense, until Tony wanted to dig a hole and hide away until doomsday.
One of the heart shaped balloons all around them popped and Tony closed his eyes tightly, when suddenly the wind picked up and he fell forward into the sand.
With a choked off gasp he awoke to the first rays of sunlight tickling his toes.
Tony was laying in their bed in the tower’s penthouse suite. Panting like a brewery horse, he turned around and saw Steve laying next to him, sleeping soundly. The clock on his nightstand read 5:24 am. Tony’s feet were cold where the blanket had fallen down over the side of the bed and there was a light sheen of sweat on his forehead.
Two garment bags were waiting innocently by the door, one with a dark blue suit, and one with a dark red suit. And next to it, on the dresser, were the ring boxes on top of the blue cue cards with his vow.
Exhausted, Tony rubbed the heels of his hands over his eyes and sighed in defeat. This crazy dream had taken a toll on him. His soon-to-be husband was stirring next to him when he exhaled shakily.
Steve pulled him into his strong arms, still half asleep. “‘s wrong?” He asked into Tony’s shoulder, not yet awake. He was all soft edges and adorable bed hair.
“Nothing. Just a crazy dream.” Tony patted his fiancè’s arm and tried to remember his crazy dream, though the edges seemed to blend together until it was one big mush. “Just promise me there will be no guinea pigs.”
Steve kept quiet for a moment, obviously processing if it was worth it to ask or just accept it. He apparently chose option B, because a second later, Tony felt him relax. “Okay. Go back to sleep, sweetheart. It’s gonna be a long day.”
Tony complied immediately and turned to bury his face in Steve’s hair. His body radiated warmth, and he pressed his cold toes to his lover’s warm calves.
And what a day it would be. The best of all.