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They didn’t know what the fuck they’d gotten themselves into. Frankly, taking care of themselves was an issue on its own but taking care of a smaller creature that took a lifetime commitment, something they hadn’t even made official between themselves, just seemed like an overflowing handful.
And yet here they stood, a sleeping child in front of them on their bed sleeping in one of Dave’s childhood t-shirts that he had always kept around for shits and giggles. It was like a dress on her.
“What the fuck do we do now?” Karkat looked up to Dave who stood only a few inches taller than him. Dave didn’t return the glance but only shrugged. Karkat looked back down at the child. “How old do you think she is?”
“Well, her teeth haven’t grown in yet,” Dave noted. “So I’d say a few months at most.”
“What the hell do you mean they haven’t grown in yet?”
Dave couldn’t help but chuckle at his horrified expression. Part of him didn’t want to explain or to just explain it in the most terrifying way possible but this time, another person was involved. A very small, vulnerable person. Jokes had to be set aside.
“Babies are born without teeth and they grow in over time, usually within a year or something. I honestly don’t remember but we’ll know it when we see it. She’ll be super fussy because it’ll hurt.”
“Jesus fucking Christ, that’s terrifying.”
“Just wait until she loses those teeth and they come in bigger.”
“What?!”
Dave would have laughed if Karkat hadn’t been loud enough to wake her. He immediately slapped a hand over his mouth and looked down as the sleeping baby who didn’t seem disturbed at all. He let out a sigh of relief before removing his hand again.
“So,” Karkat began, crossing his arms. “She’s human.”
“Yup.”
“So you know how to care for her.”
“Nope.”
“You’re useless.”
“Look,” Dave sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and lifting his shades slightly in the process. His other hand rested on his hip in a fit of exasperation. “I don’t know much about babies but I know the basics. She needs milk for a while, which we have the formula for, and once her teeth start coming in we can start feeding her soft foods. She’s going to sleep a lot but when she’s awake, someone needs to have eyes on her the entire time. Basically, we’re never going to fucking sleep.”
“But if she sleeps a lot-”
“Nope,” Dave immediately cut him off. “Because when she’s sleeping, we’ll be cleaning. And when she isn’t sleeping, we’re going to watch everything we cleaned be destroyed again.”
“So this is going to suck.”
“Probably.”
They both looked down at her again as she stirred a bit in her sleep with a soft whine. With a deep breath, Karkat carefully picked her up to hold against his chest, his hand behind her neck to support it. Her whining stopped and she fell right back to sleep.
“You’re lucky your young are cute,” Karkat snapped, almost as if it were some kind of threat. “Otherwise, this would be a lot less sweet.”
“Why the hell am I the lucky one? You’re the one helping raise her.”
“Yeah, and I wouldn’t fucking help if you or your form of offspring weren’t cute in some capacity.”
The glare Karkat sent his way didn’t stop a smug grin from spreading across his face. He stuffed his hands in his pockets, looking down at Karkat as he sat down at the edge of the bed with the baby in his arms.
“So you think I’m cute.”
“We’re fucking dating.”
“Not the point.”
A small growl rose from Karkat’s throat and Dave laughed half-heartedly before sitting beside his lover and new child. After a bit, he found himself frowning.
“Why would someone just… leave her like that?”
“I don’t know. Maybe she was too much for them to handle,” Karkat offered, looking up at Dave as well. Sadness was clear in his tone. Or pity. Maybe both.
“Sure, but there’s safe places to leave kids. When we made this universe, we made sure there were, like, drop-boxes for babies so that they could still find a home. What kind of sick fuck leaves an infant in a fucking garbage bin?”
“I don’t know, babe. But I’d fucking kill them if I knew who it was.”
Dave couldn’t help but blush. It was a pet name Karkat had picked up from him after using it often but he would never get used to hearing it from Karkat’s mouth. He tipped his head to the side to lay it on Karkat’s shoulder, looking down at this baby they decided to adopt without a second thought. What other choice did they have? It was that or let her die and that wasn’t an option. They were convinced they could do it, even if they did fuck up.
Dave was confused as to what had happened when he woke up to the sound of soft cries emanating from slightly beneath him. Upon opening his eyes, he was greeted with the sight of small blue eyes staring up at him from Karkat’s chest. They were lined with tears and suddenly, when Dave was looking at her, she only cried harder. His shades had been thrown askew when he and Karkat had laid back from their position at the edge of the bed and accidentally fallen asleep. He was only waking up when Dave sat up, fixing his glasses before getting up off the bed entirely with a pit growing in his stomach.
“Dave? What is she crying about?” Karkat’s voice was rough with sleep and he slowly sat up with the child still against his chest.
“Probably hungry,” he replied, almost too quietly. “I can go make her some milk or whatever.”
“Are you okay?”
Dave didn’t answer and simply left the room, leaving Karkat with their crying baby. He was confused by the random fit of whatever he was dealing with but didn’t let it stop him from getting up to change her out of her now soiled clothes. He changed himself as well, finding himself only mildly disgusted. Karkat left her in only a diaper as the clothes they had ordered after finding her wouldn’t arrive until the next day. He then brought her out to the kitchen where Dave was working on heating up some water for her. He was silent and kept his head down though he was only leaning against the counter and waiting, arms crossed. Karkat approached him, baby in his arms.
“Dave?”
Silence other than a soft sigh that passed his lips. Karkat frowned and repeated himself a second time to which he finally got an answer.
“I scared her,” he said. “My eyes scare her.”
“Oh,” he could only say until he noticed Dave curl into himself a bit more. “She was probably just surprised. I mean, I was surprised at first, remember?”
“She cried more when she saw. She’s fucking scared of me.”
“Shut the hell up,” he suddenly snapped, catching his attention. “Shut the hell up right now. You know she isn’t scared of you. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have fallen asleep with us so easily. Besides, she’s basically our daughter now, isn’t she? That’s the human term, right?”
“I mean… yeah, but she doesn’t recognize that yet.”
“But she will and that’s what matters. She’s not afraid of you and I never want you to fucking think like that again. You’re not your guardian.”
That hit Dave right in his chest and he thought his heart had stopped entirely for a brief moment. After a moment of letting his words sink in, knowing he was right, he let out a breath he didn’t realize was being held before reaching out.
“Can I hold her?”
“She’s yours, too, isn’t she?”
And so, she was gently handed off to Dave to be held. She was happy to relax against him instead and he noticed how soft her skin was against his calloused fingers. Karkat took over the process of making a bottle for her while Dave took her to the living room, resting on the couch and playing with the small amount of blond hair on her head. He was so scared of becoming like his guardian. He always had been so of course Karkat could see right through him. He knew exactly what Dave feared most and while looking down at the baby, he still feared it. He knew it wouldn’t happen, but he still feared it.
Karkat returned only a few minutes later with a bottle that Dave took from him to feed her. Karkat took a seat beside him, leaving him with a kiss on the cheek and a few more reassuring words before turning on a show for background noise while they admired and learned more about their new addition.
“Rose! Kanaya! Thank fucking God, you’re here.”
Dave was quick to usher them into the apartment only seconds after they had knocked on the door. While the living room was a mess of building blocks and stuffed animals, it was still somewhat tidy. However, it was clear that Dave hadn’t had a moment’s rest as he quickly scooped up his daughter, rescuing her from reaching up to knock a glass over on the coffee table. Rose laughed a bit and approached him, gently touching her nose.
“Well, she sure is a handful, isn’t she?”
“This new crawling thing is absolute bullshit,” Dave sighed, though he was smiling. “She’s nowhere and everywhere at the same time all the time. She stood up the other day. That was cool.”
“Not cool at all!” Karkat’s voice called from the kitchen and it was clear that Dave rolled his eyes from behind his shades in response. “She almost spilled my fucking drink!”
“I told you that having wine when she was in the room was going to be a disaster!”
Rose giggled again and Kanaya ran off to the kitchen to help Karkat with dinner preparations. Dave handed his daughter over to his sister as she began to fuss over being in her father’s arms and constricted to the space of his chest. Rose was more than happy to take her niece in hand, playing with her small fingers and tickling her playfully.
“How have you and Karkat been handling this new stage of hers?”
“Oh God,” Dave groaned, flopping down onto the couch and taking a long drink from his water bottle, something he hadn’t had the chance to do for a while. “It’s just us running around making sure she doesn’t get herself killed. I don’t get it. I know babies are high maintenance, but this is getting personal.”
“Alright, drama queen,” Rose poked with a laugh. “I can tell you’re having fun.”
“Oh yeah, she’s the best. But also the worst. She’s always sleeping when Karkat and I are awake and then awake when we’re trying to sleep. Both of us are operating on maybe three hours and three cups of coffee.”
“That sure does sound tiring,” Rose smiled down at her niece who reached up to grab at her headband. Rose allowed her to. “It’s a good thing you’re keen on getting your exercise in. I’m sure you get plenty with her.”
“Definitely.” Dave looked up at Rose’s longing smile as she looked down at his daughter. He noticed. “How’s it going with Kanaya? Any progress?”
“We got confirmation that she is unable to bear children so it’s up to me to endure pregnancy if we want to have a biological child,” Rose responded, bouncing the baby in her arms gently. “The good news is that after some tests, I am able to do so even with someone of another species. However, the concern is the difficulty. It’s all based on chance.”
Dave nodded slightly. He had heard about the process in detail from Rose, taking the bone marrow of another woman to create a child. He knew it was painful, long, and emotionally taxing all for what he and Karkat accidentally came across without any of that beginning struggle. With the way Rose looked down at his baby, he knew, though. She would definitely be perfect for the job.
“Well,” he said with a slight smile. “If you ever want a break from trying to get pregnant, you’re welcome to come visit her. I’m sure she’d prefer to hang out with an aunt who isn’t too tired to play all the time.”
“You know I’d love to come care for her,” she replied with a smile. “She’s lovely.”
“She really is.”
“Do you think she’s still scared of me?”
Karkat’s thoughts of sleeping were interrupted when Dave suddenly spoke up amidst the silence in the dark room. The question was genuine so Karkat refrained from snapping at him for disturbing what could have been sleep. Instead, he turned over to look at Dave in the dark. He could still see the shades of red in his eyes. He had learned to love that red.
“Dave, she’s over half a sweep old now,” he muttered, clearly tired. “She literally calls you ‘papa’. I seriously doubt she’s ever been afraid of you.”
“That time when she saw my eyes. She was terrified.”
“She was surprised , Dave. She doesn’t know how to differentiate blue from red yet. She was probably just shocked to see someone looking at her when she opened her eyes.”
“I don’t know…”
“She loves you.” Karkat reassured him by reaching up, his hands on his cheeks. Dave couldn’t help but lean into the touch. “She’s not afraid, alright? Stop thinking like that. She’s got nothing to be afraid of, anyway. You’re a goddamn baby barkbeast.”
“A puppy?”
“Whatever you humans call it.”
“You know what we call puppies, dude.”
“Go to sleep already! Aren’t you fucking tired from chasing your daughter around the apartment all day long?!”
Dave immediately laughed as the quiet in their room was broken by his sudden shouting. They were lucky that their baby had been moved to her own bedroom and wouldn’t wake up from the sound of her other father yelling. She was safe from the noise while Dave was not, but he didn’t want it any other way. Dave grabbed his wrists and pulled him in against him, meeting his lips. Karkat reciprocated despite the annoyance he felt in his chest. How could he not? It wasn’t like they got much time together anymore.
Teeth met tongue and a single kiss turned into a dozen. Who could blame them? They had time.
Dave was the first to wake the next morning, listening to the sound of soft cries through the baby monitor on Karkat’s side of the bed. He stirred but before he could fully wake up, Dave leaned over him to turn the volume down a few notches and when Karkat settled down again, he smiled and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. He decided to let Karkat sleep in for a few more hours as he got out of bed, slipping his shades on before making his way to his daughter’s room.
Upon opening the door, he was met with sweet blue eyes peeking above the top edge of the crib as she draped her arms over the front.
“Hey, baby,” he greeted, going over to pick her up. “Looking for an escape route?”
“Papa,” she replied, reaching up to grab at his shades. He pulled away before she could get a grip though and simply smiled down at her.
“Let’s get you changed and we’ll go make some breakfast for your mama, alright?”
She seemed to understand and gave a small nod, moving her arms around his shoulders and allowing him to bring her to the dresser, setting her down on top to pick out some clothes. He helped her change into a dress, poking fun at her as he did. However, after she was in her clothes and back in his arms, she reached up again.
“Papa.”
“Yes, baby?”
When her hands found the sides of his glasses, he didn’t stop her for once. Dave’s mind wandered back to the night before when Karkat insisted she wouldn’t be afraid, that it had only been surprise. He didn’t want to scare her but he didn’t want to keep hiding. While he loved Karkat, he loved her more and he knew that Karkat did, too. She was their first priority and the last thing they wanted to teach her was that it was okay to hide when she didn’t like something about herself. He allowed her to tug them off gently and blue eyes met red.
The two of them stared in silence for a moment and to Dave’s joy, she didn’t seem frightened in any way. She just seemed as though she were taking in some new information which wasn’t a bad thing at all. Then she smiled wide and brought his shades to cover her own eyes.
“Papa!”
Dave couldn’t help but laugh a little and give her a little kiss which left her smiling as well. She was a lot to handle as most children were but he would give absolutely anything for her.
“Yeah, you look like papa. You look cool.”
“Cool?”
“That’s right.”
“Oh!” She suddenly lit up, looking just behind Dave’s shoulder. “Mama!”
Dave turned to glance at the doorway and saw Karkat standing there, a little smile on his face. He leaned in the doorway and while he was smiling, he was still tired.
“Well, would you look at that,” he mumbled, gesturing to their baby. Dave’s shades were barely hanging on to the bridge of her nose and were crooked enough to still see her eyes. “What’d I tell you?”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Dave responded, rolling his own eyes. “You know me, though.”
“Yeah, I do.”
Karkat approached them, wrapping his arms around Dave from behind until their daughter reached out for him. He eventually took her and held her to his chest. Dave looked down at them and smiled again.
“Sorry, I was going to let you sleep in for a few more hours,” he said, taking his glasses back from his toddler. Karkat shook his head.
“No, it’s alright. I woke up after you got up anyway and was just listening in on the baby monitor. You both are cute.”
“We know.”
Karkat rolled his eyes and nudged Dave gently with his elbow and they both chuckled a bit. Dave leaned down and kissed him softly and quickly.
“Hungry?”
“Abso-fucking-lutely.”