Archive of Our Own ^beta

Josiah Charles Stamp

Ianto watches Jack and worries. Jack just up and disappeared minutes after coming back to life after the Abaddon-incident. He came walking back into the Hub four days later, grinning as though he'd never been gone. Not as though nothing had happened, Ianto muses.

Jack seems different now. Ianto wonders whether the others see it, too. Jack flirts and smiles and his gaze only drifts into nothingness when he thinks no one will notice.

'Here's your coffee, Sir,' Ianto says and sets down the cup on an unoccupied spot on Jack's desk. He prepared it just the way Jack likes it.

Jack looks up from the register, caps his fountain pen. 'Ianto, you're an angel!' he sighs exaggeratedly. 'I feel like I'm drowning in paperwork.'

Ianto inclines his head, keeps his voice even. 'Certainly, Sir. Four days can be a long time when it comes to filing.'

There's a moment of silence. Ianto notices Jack rubbing the pulse point of his wrist in slow circles. He doesn't think Jack is aware of doing so.

'Yeah,' Jack mutters. 'A long time indeed.' He visibly pulls himself together and winks. 'Anyway, thanks for the coffee.'

Ianto studies Jack for another second. Something happened to Jack in those four days, Ianto is sure of it. He doesn't know how to ask, though.

It's a few weeks later, when Ianto and Jack are the only ones left in the Hub again that Ianto hears it. They analysed the sound files, listened to the sequence over and over again; the sound that accompanied Jack's departure.

Ianto hesitates, scared to turn around and look in case Jack will be gone again. He starts when he feels a hand on his shoulder. Jack stands so close that Ianto feels his body heat through their clothes. He wants to lean back into that warmth, let Jack comfort and soothe.

'Don't worry,' Jack's voice sounds amused, but there's an underlying sadness in his tone and his shoulders are tense, 'I'm not going anywhere.'

Ianto feels shaken, wills his hands not to tremble. He keeps his eyes on Jack who steps onto the lift, presses a button on the control on his wrist. The lift rumbles, moves up – towards whatever it was that took Jack away the first time.

Ianto bites his lip, makes a decision. With two steps, he reaches the lift and joins Jack on it.

A number of expressions flicker over Jack's face before it settles as a blank mask, but he shifts his weight to make space for Ianto.

In front of the Millennium Centre, a few steps from the lift, stands a blue box. Ianto raises his eyebrows and his heart beats faster. He's seen the box before, just like the man who leans against it, gaze fixed on Jack and Ianto. He shouldn't be able to see them, Ianto thinks, but the man smiles, says 'Captain' before they step off the lift.

'Doctor,' Jack replies, tips his head. Ianto swallows dryly. 'The Doctor?' his voice almost breaks over the word as he makes the connection. Jack looks at him, calm and steady, but the man – The Doctor – steps forward and gives a little wave. 'Hello there,' he grins, 'I do believe we have not met before. I'm good at remembering faces, me. Who'd you be, then?'

'Ianto Jones.' Jack answers. 'He was at Canary Warf.'

'Oh,' the Doctor mutters and a shadow passes over his face, 'Oh. Well. Torchwood staff, then?'

He doesn't look like a menace, like a man responsible for so many deaths. He's skinny and tall and the pinstriped suit doesn't match with the Converse or the messy hair. He looks, Ianto thinks, like a man who got dressed this morning for work and forgot halfway through that he wasn't going to the sports field instead to hang out with his mates.

'Not that I'm not glad to see you,' Jack breaks the silence, 'but what are you doing here? And how long's it been for you?'

'Not long. Not long at all, in fact. No, really. I just dropped Martha off at her parent's and I thought I could pay you a little visit, see how you've settled in. Of course you had to settle in first of all, so I came a few weeks later, you see?'

Ianto stares. He closes his eyes, takes a breath to collect himself. This is not his battle to fight, not his place to talk, he realises as he takes in Jack's stance. Jack seems relaxed enough, but his jaw is clenched and he's flexing his fingers. He hasn't looked away from the Doctor once.

'Martha left,' Jack says. He doesn't sound surprised.

'Babbled something about her friend pining after a guy and about getting out. Said she'd have to look after her family, finish her exams.'

Jack nods and Ianto wishes – not for the first time – that Jack would talk to him more. All the hours they spent together and still Ianto knows nothing about Jack.

'So you're alone again and you thought you'd drop by, see if I was tempted?' Jack asks, tilts his head. His voice is neutral and flat.

'Oh, no, nothing like that of course. Though you know I wouldn't mind, don't you? You still feel wrong, but like you said. Prejudice. I should work on that, shouldn't I?' The Doctor gives a blinding grin. Ianto grits his teeth. He thinks he sees loneliness in the Doctor's eyes, but he is certain he recognises a flash of hurt pass Jack's face.

'Have you been living in a linear time line for a while lately?' Jack's question catches the Doctor off guard. He blinks, frowns slightly.

'Well, I did for some time when I became human. Before the Family of Blood found me. Not long, though. Why do you ask?'

Jack shrugs. 'It shows,' he says and takes a step towards the Doctor. Ianto realises they're all standing next to a blue box, for everyone to see and overhear.

'It shows that you haven't,' Jack continues, voice even and eyes bland. 'You're so used to travelling through time and space, of just leaving once the earth is saved again. You never stay to deal with the consequences.'

'Now that's not,' the Doctor begins but Jack interrupts him, quiet and sure. 'You're always running, Doctor.'

The Doctor raises one eyebrow and chews on his lip. 'Is this about...?' he trails off.

'Come on, Doctor,' Jack jerks his head towards the lift, 'let's take this somewhere else.'

The lift gets rather crowded with three men on it. Ianto leans into Jack who throws him a distracted smile. His mind is elsewhere. The Doctor gesticulates and rambles. 'So I'll get to see your Torchwood, then, huh? Rebuilt, he said, different now. I wonder how different Torchwood can really become.'

'Haven't screwed up yet, have we?' Ianto hates the way the corners of Jack's mouth curl down and his voice is clipped. He's the first to step off the lift.

'I'll make coffee, then, shall I?' he asks. Jack throws him another smile and nods.

'Tea for me, if you can manage,' the Doctor quips.

Ianto watches Jack lead the Doctor into his office, hears the Doctor's voice, 'Oooh, is this a Invedian Copy Device? Handy, these things.' Ianto takes a deep breath and goes to prepare the Doctor's tea.

'You save the universe all the time, Doctor, I'll give you that,' Ianto hears Jack's raised voice. He hesitates, a few steps away and just around the corner, tray with coffee and tea in his hands. 'But you never stay to deal with the people, do you? You never sit down with the boy whose view on the world was just shattered when he learnt that aliens existed – just before they try to eat him. And you're not around when the girl whose boyfriend died goes to the therapist to learn how to cope, are you?'

If the Doctor answers, it's too quiet for Ianto to hear.

'The Oncoming Storm. That one's really true, isn't it?' Jack laughs and the bitter sound of it makes Ianto wince. 'You waltz in and save the day, but you leave a mess in your wake.'

Ianto closes his eyes, imagines Jack standing in front of the Doctor. He wonders if the anger he feels towards the Doctor is reflected in Jack's stare. Ianto swallows dryly, walks closer. He holds the tray close to his body, like a shield or a peace offering.

Neither of them look up when he approaches. The Doctor steps closer to Jack but doesn't touch him. He tilts his head. 'Do you feel better now?' he asks quietly.

Jack breaks their gaze first. He lifts one hand, brushes against the Doctor's. For a moment, it looks as though they are holding hands. Ianto's throat closes and his chest feels too tight. 'Sir, your coffee and the tea,' he interrupts. He can't bring himself to smile.

'Thanks, Ianto.' Jack seems calmer now, more relaxed. He sits down on the edge of his desk and cradles his cup between his hands. Ianto remembers the feel of those hands on his skin and wonders if the Doctor knows the sensation, too.

It's not a pleasant thought. The Doctor shares an intimacy and intensity with Jack that Ianto can't. Ianto watches the way Jack's smile comes easier now and remembers Jack said he wasn't leaving.

'I'll go home then if you don't need me anymore.' Ianto takes a breath, lets it out slowly. 'Bye Ianto,' Jack calls out and the Doctor gives him a little wave.

Ianto leaves the Hub. It's dark outside, but the sky is clear and it doesn't rain. Ianto turns to walk towards his apartment, sits down on the kerb after a few steps and rubs his hands over his face. His thoughts are a tangled mess. He listens to the voices of people drifting over from the pubs on the other side of the street and tries to think of nothing at all.

He can't begin to make sense of the encounter, realises there's too much he doesn't know about Jack. He wonders if Jack will explain it to him, if he'll understand one day.

Ianto doesn't know how long he's been sitting there when he catches a movement from the corner of his eye. Jack and the Doctor step from the lift and walk towards the police box that must be the Doctor's ship.

'So.' The words are quiet, barely loud enough for Ianto to hear. Jack puts his hands into his pockets. 'Thanks for dropping by,' he says with a laugh. Ianto thinks he might have winked at the Doctor.

'Jack,' the Doctor's voice is serious, as is his gaze. 'I'm sorry.'

Jack opens his mouth, but the Doctor leans over, kisses him. Ianto bites his lip. The kiss lasts and lingers and speaks of the same intensity Ianto saw before. There are no straying hands and no tongue, there's nothing physical about it. For Jack, it's a chaste kiss. Ianto thinks that might be why it seems to mean so much.

The Doctor steps away reluctantly, glances back twice before he enters his ship and closes the door behind him. Jack stands to attention, salutes and the police box begins to fade.

Ianto stands up with the plan to leave, give Jack some space. Jack turns, walks back to the lift and pauses when he sees Ianto.

'I didn't mean...' Ianto says. Jack crosses the distance between them, slings an arm over Ianto's shoulder and grins at him.

'Let's go grab something to eat, shall we?'

Ianto smiles at him and thinks that just maybe, he doesn't need to understand. Maybe it can be enough that Jack is still here and that they're both breathing a little easier.