Work Text:
Keigo liked to sit on the roof and look out at the city. Mom didn’t like him flying up here—she said he needed to stay inside to hide his wings, but he liked them, and especially liked the way the wind filtered through the feathers. The roof was Keigo’s spot, and nobody else knew about it anyway. He came up here to hide from his dad, and he was never found. None of the people below ever saw him except for one time a baby in a carriage had looked up and made grabby hands at him, so Keigo smiled shyly and waved back.
When their house was ruined in the storm, Keigo lost the roof. He missed it. He didn’t miss Dad, who’d also disappeared with the storm, but he missed the way things were before. Now, he was stuck on the ground. They lived under a blanket that was nailed to the stone wall at the edge of the city.
Mom said, “Hide your wings, hide your wings,” but she also said, “Keigo, money.”
It started off with him leaving his wings and with Mom in pieces. She stayed there during the day, huddled under the meager shadow of the blanket to escape the scorching sun. His feathers hid in a hole he’d dug in the dirt, and he made sure to cover them with a rock every day before heading out. He couldn’t detach the feathers on the rest of his body, but if he wore a long tunic and leggings underneath, it was lumpy instead of feathery. People were always telling him his eyes were pretty, with the marks and the feathers underneath, but they wouldn’t think that if they saw the rest of him.
While Mom hid in the shade, Keigo ran through the dusty streets, careful to keep himself small and hunched over. He didn’t know how to get money. Mom said he could sell things, but he didn’t have anything to sell, so the first couple of days, he watched the baker to see how he did it, peeking over a wall on the other side of the street. His eyes were pretty good; he saw that the baker made food that smelled really delicious, and then people took it and gave him coins. Keigo found himself getting distracted—instead of thinking of ways to sell things, he was thinking of how grumbly his stomach was and how he could almost taste that swirl bun in his mouth.
One day, he saw another kid about his size hurt his leg and start crying. His mom came up and started yelling at a man steering a cart, and he hopped down and bowed over and over and apologized until he looked like he was going to cry, then he handed them a bag of coins. Well. Keigo didn’t want to break his leg, not even for money. A little bit later, he saw the boy walking just fine, and decided that he didn’t want to lie to get money either.
He returned every day to their blanket against the wall feeling more and more useless.
“Hey,” said Mom one day when he returned. She was cowering in the shade again, looking at the ground, not even looking up at Keigo when he came back. “No, leave your feathers. Don’t put them back on. Since you couldn’t get any money, I had to find some. And I got hurt. It’s been weeks. Buy us food since I can’t walk.”
Keigo wanted his wings so he could use them to cover his head. He wasn’t going to cry, and Mom never looked at him anyway, but his cheeks burned and he wanted to hide. “Okay,” he whispered. It was his fault she got hurt, he knew.
Before today, he’d been looking forward to the day they finally had money so he could stop eating the old fruit the shopkeepers threw out to the dogs and buy the swirl bun from the baker, but now his heart was heavy and he dragged his feet.
He wished he had his wings; he wanted to fly away.
That thought made him feel even worse. How could he think that? He was horrible, wanting to leave Mom all by herself. No wonder she didn’t want him to have his wings, he would just leave her all alone. He knew she wouldn’t survive if he did.
For now, he’d just get them some food. The closer he got to the bakers’ stand, the more he remembered how excited he was for the swirl bun. With that thought, he started running. He knew from observation that the buns cost 3 bronze coins each, and he had almost a whole purse full of them; maybe he could even get two! He was sure hungry enough to eat that many! He could probably even eat three!
His balance was off without his wings, even though he rarely had them on these days. He didn’t miss his father, but he missed being able to keep his feathers on in their little house or up on the roof. He felt so heavy now, unable to fly, but he knew he was still fast, and at least he still had his tail feathers hidden under his tunic in case he needed them.
Out of breath, Keigo skittered over to the baker’s stand.
“Excuse me, sir!” he said as he put his hands on the table in front of the glass and pushed himself up on his toes. “Can I have four of your swirl buns please?”
“Of course! That’ll be twelve bronze.” Keigo had to lower himself down from his toes to pull out the bag and count out twelve coins, then he lifted himself back up and slid them under the glass, vibrating with anticipation but keeping his lips pressed shut to not let out any squawks like Mom said. The baker motioned for him to come around to the side of his stall. “Hey there,” he said softly. Here are your rolls.” He held out a tray with the buns on it, but Keigo didn’t have a basket like everyone else who came by, so he balanced two of them on each hand—if he ate two of them right now, he would only have to carry one in each hand back to Mom.
They smelled so good; he wasn’t sure how the baker didn’t eat them all himself! “Thank you, sir!” he chirped, not taking his eyes off of the swirl buns as he slowly turned around.
“Wait a second, young man!”
Keigo froze. Even though he knew he didn’t have his feathers and the baker didn’t sound angry, Keigo curled himself protectively around the swirl buns. He didn’t want to smush them if he had to run, so hopefully he would be okay if he listened. “Yes, sir?” he asked in a voice that sounded so small he doubted the baker heard it. He tried again a little more loudly. “Yes, sir?”
The baker walked around in front of him and crouched down to look up into Keigo’s eyes. “Hey, I’m not mad.” Keigo was relieved, but still nervous, so he didn’t say anything else. “I’ve just noticed you around here a lot, you’ve wanted those twist rolls for a while now, yeah?”
“Y-” It came out too quietly, so Keigo cleared his throat. “Yeah.”
The baker smiled. “I was just thinkin’,” he said. “I could use another pair of helping hands for delivery, someone fast like you.”
Keigo swallowed silently.
“So, what do ya say? You help me with deliveries, and I’ll give you a silver coin and a twist roll every day?”
Keigo knew better than to trust that. He glared at the baker warily.
The baker just laughed.
“Here, hey, you’re a smart kid, you know that? I can see you’re a little hesitant. But what if I gave you an extra twist roll in advance?”
Would he really? Keigo’s heart jumped a little, and he nodded.
Standing up, the baker smiled and clapped his hands. It made Keigo startle a little, but he was used to that kind of thing and so he kept himself very still and the swirl buns didn’t fall off of his hands.
The man crouched down again to hand him a basket. “Okay, since you’re my delivery boy now, you get a special basket, and it can help you carry all of these home so you don’t drop any.” He took the buns one by one and set them in the basket, then added one more and folded a cloth over the top with a gentle pat. “Okay, I’ll see you here tomorrow morning. I’m counting on you!”
Keigo nodded and scampered off to hide behind a wall. He couldn’t wait until he got back; he wasn’t patient enough. He slid down against it and set the basket down on his crossed legs—five swirl buns. Five! For weeks, he hadn’t dared hope for anything more than a bite of one. He had to be careful about getting his hopes up and trusting the baker too quickly, but five! Reverently, he lifted the cloth and gasped; the last bun that the baker had set on top was still warm. It smelled warm, too. He rubbed his dirty hand on his dirtier shirt to try and clean it off, then tore off a large chunk of the bun. It looked so soft, like the cotton and the wool he saw the ladies pulling apart at the market, only delicious instead of dirty. The only dirty thing was himself, and he didn’t want his hand to get the bun even more dirty, so he quickly took a bite.
He’d never tasted anything so good in his entire life! And he had five of them! He chirped happily.
He was so shocked that he slammed his other hand over his mouth and frantically looked around. He hadn’t had to worry about happy chirps in a while.
The bun was gone too quickly, and now that he’d started eating, it was hard to stop. It was almost like he was hungrier than before, because now that he knew how delicious the buns were, he wanted to eat another even more. But no, no, he couldn’t. He had to take them to Mom. He had to go back home.
Mom didn’t even look up when he got back, just stared absently across the dusty street.
“Mom?” he said tentatively, ducking under the cloth to sit down and scoot the rock off of where he kept his feathers. “I brought some food.”
“Keigo, leave your feathers off.”
His feathers? “But…”
“It’s not safe. You can’t let people see them.”
“But…”
“Is that…” she trailed off, mesmerized by Keigo’s basket.
“I brought some food! It’s from a really nice baker and he said he can give me coins if I work for him! Here.” He pulled back the cloth from the basket, folding it carefully and only touching it with the tips of his fingers so he wouldn’t leave smudges.
Mom grabbed the cloth anyway and pushed it off into the dirt. She grabbed a roll, and as soon as she did, Keigo picked one up to cradle it carefully and shook out the cloth before placing it back over the basket. Mom must have been really hungry; she ate the whole thing in six bites and was reaching for another one.
“Care…ful…” he started to protest, but trailed off when she knocked the cloth over again.
He replaced it, then snuck some of his dirt-covered feathers back on. Even though it was just Mom and she didn’t really notice things, he was too scared to not be quiet and small, so he called the feathers back one at a time.
Once his wings got almost big enough to be noticeable, he snuck the rest into his hands and curled around them, hugging them tight to his chest. It would be selfish to ask for another of the rolls after he’d already had two, and Mom was so much bigger than him, so she needed bigger food. And the baker seemed really, really nice, so he’d actually share a swirl bun like he said.
He smiled into his feathers, and, after waiting for Mom to fall asleep, dared to wrap a wing around himself as he snuggled in against the stone wall. He always woke up earlier than her anyway, so she wouldn’t notice.
He was so excited to see the baker again that he kept waking himself up in the middle of the night, thinking it was morning already. Each time, he buried his face back in his feathers to hide his smile. From whom, he didn’t know, but he felt like it should be a secret anyway.
In the morning, he left his feathers behind and kissed Mom on the forehead, then picked up the baker’s basket and skipped his way there over the cobblestone. He smiled brightly at the baker, who smiled brightly back.
“Here,” said the baker, directing him to a wash basin. “Wash up, then I’ll send you on your way!”
Keigo gratefully scrubbed at his face, hands, and arms until they felt brand new, then, still dripping, turned around to smile at the baker, who laughed and dried him off with a thin towel. “What’s your name, little one?”
“I’m Keigo.”
“Nice to meet you. I’m Togata. Okay, Keigo. I want you to deliver these to the East district, by the river. There’s a big street called Market Street, and there’s a lady with a stand like this. She’s called Aya-san, ask around for her. She’ll send you back with coins. You got that?”
Keigo nodded.
“Okay, eat this, then be on your way.”
Keigo kept up his routine with the baker all the way into winter. Every morning, he’d wash up and eat with Togata and then run all over the city delivering bread until almost-dark. He made friends all over, and they gave him extra coins for his fast delivery, smiling at him. Nui-san from the South district even made him a bracelet with pretty red beads. “To match your feathers!” she’d said, and Keigo had gone blank and still, until she’d reassured him, “It’s okay! I’m not one of those people who’ll hate you because of that. It’s just, you’ve got some tail feathers sticking out of your tunic, I think it’s cute!”
In the colder months, the warmth of fresh baked bread and pastries in his basket kept him warm. He didn’t have enough money to buy a fire stone, but he had enough to buy them two blankets and some matches. It was easy to find things to burn lying around—discarded furniture, dry and dying weeds, an old crashed cart on the other side of the wall.
He had his feathers attached more often than not, wrapping them around both Mom and himself to keep them warm, and since he took one of the blankets with him to run his errands for the baker, he could keep his wings small on his back and they’d still be hidden.
He wasn’t sure, but he thought Mom might be a little happier. She wasn’t so skinny anymore, and sometimes when he came back at night, she would get up and walk.
Keigo started coming home with more than just leftover baked goods; Togata had said he needed to eat more veggies and sent him with more coins so he could buy some, and so he started stopping at a vegetable stand on the way home. The green ones tasted really good if he cooked them over the fire, but his favorite thing to eat was still the swirl buns.
In the late winter right at the beginning of the rainy season, Keigo carried an even bigger basket than usual that Togata covered with an enchanted cloth to protect from the water. People were happy to see him; they all stayed indoors with their heating stones and wanted warm rolls and buns to ward off the chilly and soggy weather. They ushered him in from the cold—“Oh, come in, you poor thing, you’re drenched! You must be freezing!” and he would warm up before saying, “Thank you so much, ma’am, but I have more deliveries to make,” and they’d promise to have him come over and meet their little niece or nephew or grandchildren. He knew he probably would never return, but it was still fun.
In the future, he hoped that he and Mom could live in a house with walls like these people did, and maybe he could deliver her the meat buns she liked during the day, and she could invite him inside and wrap one of their blankets around him and tell him to take a break and sit by the fire. She looked worse now that it was rainy season, but the rain made everyone sad, so he was sure she’d be fine when it was sunny and warm again.
One day when the rain had let up to just a sticky dampness and a drip in the air, Keigo walked home with his basket full of new vegetables he wanted to try: they were orange and smelled like dirt, but he’d stopped by the river on the way home to wash them off. Soon, when the rains were over, everything would start growing again and he could pick oranges and guavas off of the trees on his way home. It would be so much easier with his basket, too. One time last year, he’d been trying to bring fruit home by using his shirt as a pouch, but it was too heavy and it ripped. Father wasn’t happy that he’d ripped his shirt and bruised the fruit. He wished he’d had his basket back then.
Now, he even had an enchanted cloth, which was good, because on his way home the rain started to pick up.
Mom was home when he got back, pressed all the way against the stone wall, not caring about the water dripping on her from above. Her eyes were darting everywhere.
“Keigo,” she said.
“Yes, Mom?” He hurried to set the basket down and call his feathers to him as he went to check on her. “How was your day? I got us a new vegetable to try!”
“Sit down… light the fire please, it went out.”
Keigo lit the fire and sat down a little anxiously; she usually didn’t ask him. He tried to act like he wasn’t worried by pulling out the vegetables and filling up their metal pot with the drips so he could cook them.
“Stay there,” she rasped. “Don’t move.”
That made Keigo itch and need to move, but he’d learned to freeze up when he heard that, so he stilled his ruffling feathers. He felt someone approaching them and glanced at Mom to see if she’d noticed and that’s why she was telling him to stay still. She was looking right at them.
Now that he knew why she was acting strange, he breathed out a sigh of relief and shrunk his wings behind him out of habit. It would look more suspicious to be doing nothing at all, so he put the veggies over the fire.
A man stepped under the roof.
Keigo immediately flew in front of Mom to keep her safe.
“Good evening, sir,” he said when he saw the sword.
He didn’t respond, just grabbed Keigo’s arm.
Keigo froze up again, and another man he didn’t notice before grabbed his other arm.
He didn’t know what they were doing! He always got hurt more if he moved, but Mom was here too, and he needed to keep her safe.
“Mom! Run!”
She didn’t run, just sat there like she always did.
“Mom!” he begged.
He was slippery from the dripping rain, so he was able to squirm away from the men until one grabbed his wing and twisted while the other snapped cold metal over his neck.
His wing hurt where it dangled uselessly, and he tried not to cry. He needed Mom to run! “Please! Run away!”
The men didn’t pay any attention to her, though, as they clicked chains over his hands and legs.
He stopped struggling when he saw one hand her a bag of coins, and when Keigo heard his basket handle snap as the man stepped on it on the way out, he started to cry.
“Rei-san!” called Hawks through the window.
It had been a nice flight over; it was sunny and hot, but he’d left in the early morning to avoid getting scorched by the heat. As a precaution, he’d also slathered oily cream over his face and back so they wouldn’t burn. It was starting to heat up, though, and he was a little sweaty. He didn’t think Rei would mind. She was always so happy to see him, even that first time when he’d staggered in drenched in mud and rain.
“Hawks!” she called. “Come in!” Her tower was blessedly cool. “How was your flight?” she asked, opening up her ice box to rummage through it.
“Oh, it was good. I just came from Hakamata’s kingdom, and—”
“That explains the silk then,” she said, holding out something to him on a stick. “Tell me more, but I want you to try this!”
Instead of a chicken skewer, it was something frozen.
Rei’s tower was always warm in the cold months, dry in the rain, and cool in the hot months. And now she was even making him cold food? On top of that, it was delicious!
He told her so, and she handed him another.
“Rei-san, you could totally open a store just selling all the things you make like this. I’d go there all the time. When I was– I mean, I could be your delivery bird! And I could bring you recipes from everywhere!”
“I’d actually really like that, Hawks.”
He paused, debating how much to tell her. This was something he held close to his chest, his little dream that he liked to take out at night. He’d never told anyone, but, he’d also never been as close with anyone as with Rei.
He licked the frozen sweet pensively, and she waited patiently for him to speak his thoughts.
“I, um, I’ve always wanted to be a baker. Maybe… when you can leave and I have a little more, uh, time, we could do something like that? Together?”
She smiled at him, and maybe if it were a cold and dark day outside, it would have seemed melancholy, but the sun caught on her pale eyelashes and lit up her face. “Let’s plan on it.”
Hawks bit his lip to keep his smile small. But he definitely would. He’d make Rei swirl buns and she’d make these desserts and her kids would come in and laugh with them and ask for more. He’d poke at Shouto with a feather until he reacted and told him the food was delicious.
“Oh, Hawks, I didn’t notice your freckles before! It must be because of all the sun recently!”
“What freckles, I don’t have freckles!”
“Right. These spots on your face are just… your friends?”
He rolled his eyes. “They’re not my friends until they let me crash in their home all the time.”
“Hawks, they live on you. You are their home.”
Hawks humphed, and stayed on Rei’s chair, looking out her window. He liked the view from here, so up high. He stared there in the cool tower, then sighed when it was time to head back to the Commission and slathered the cream over his tattoos again. They always acted up if they got too hot, and a sunburn would overheat them.
“Leaving?”
“Yep, back to the grind.”
“Well. You know I always have to send you home with something.” Ah. Home. “Here, take the rest of these! I’ll put them with ice and wrap it all in my cold cloth.”
“Well, you know I won’t complain!” he said, standing up to shake his wings and get ready to leave.
“Here,” she said, handing him a basket. “Take good care of this for me! You can bring it back to me full of flowers. I do love the flowers you bring me.”
It had been years since he'd delivered anything but information. Somehow, Rei's flowers seemed more important.