Chapter Text
Demitri did something completely stupid
He agreed to date Eli his old best friend to prove the past was behind them but to be honest Demitri wasn’t ready for this. Yes, he liked his friend but what he did.
Eli hurt him.
He willingly broke Demitris’s arm just because he was angry.
He still has nightmares about it but Hawk has been trying to fix himself and be better and now they can finally be together right?
“What are you thinking about?” Hawk asked he could tell something was on his boyfriend’s mind
“Just uh thinking about this test it’s going to be so bad” Demitri lies he didn’t want to hurt his feelings. God, it was so stupid to be so upset after all this time. his arm was mostly healed but every time they kiss he can feel it ache just a bit more.
He’s scared of his boyfriend
“You are the smartest person in class you will ace this test like always” Hawks shrugged and held Dimitris’s hand.
Hawks loved Demitri since the second grade when Demitri gave Hawks his transformer action figure because he left his on the bus.
Eli was new and was very shy but that never stopped Demetri he would have never guessed their rocky history.
“Thanks, I should get seated. see you after class” Hawks went in for a kiss but Demetri rushed away
“Looks like trouble in paradise” he heard Kyler but ignored him. He could break his face but he was trying to be better
He wanted to be better.
Maybe Demitri was ashamed of dating him?
Hawk needed to stop overthinking
Demitri did avoid kissing hawk it was obvious Demitri tried to make it seem like it wasn’t obvious but it was and it made Hawk feel like shit.
Hawk started noticing some small flinches when he would touch Demitri nothing big just small touches holding hands putting an arm over Demitris shoulder he would flinch and act like he didn’t he didn’t get it but he realized he’s never been alone with him in a room they were only dating for two months but they have not even been alone in a car together. The reality hit him like a ton of bricks
His boyfriend was scare of him.
Demitri closed the locker door he was tired and was so stressed about the test and he was so tense all the time
“Hey we need to talk about us”
Demitri turned around to see a gloomy-looking Hawk. It looked like he was crying Demitri had a bad gut feeling “okay uh where do you want to talk?” he knew it was serious.
Hawk shrugged “somewhere public so you feel safe”
Fuck Hawk knew fuck fuck fuck Demitri was gonna panic. Everything was fine
“We can talk in private if you want,” Demitri said he didn’t want to be alone with him but this was a private conversation he needed to have so Hawks nodded walking to a classroom where no one was in he didn’t close the door just left it almost shut to make Demitri feel safe
“So what did you want to talk about” Demitri tried to act like he didn’t know what was going on.
“Why do you flinch so much when I’m with you”
“You know I have ticks and I’ve been stress-”
“Bullshit you don’t flinch when your with other people I know you don’t stop lying to me and tell me the truth” Hawk didn’t want to yell but he hated lies
“You want the truth? You broke my arm. You and your buddies wanted to hurt me so badly and guess what Eli you got it. I want to love you but you hurt me so badly I always wanted to be with you and you hurt me” Demitri was crying he held this in for months and Hawk couldn’t say anything
“I didn’t think you would do it I thought our friendship was stronger than that but you looked me in the face and broke my arm and I can’t get over it so easily because I can’t even kiss you without seeing what you did” with his free arm he wiped his eyes with his sleeve
“I’m sorry please believe me but I’m getting better I am in anger management therapy I won’t ever hurt you as I did”
“Sometimes that’s not enough you cant go back and fix what you did and I can’t heal fast enough physically and mentally”
“Then why did you agree to go out with me?”
“Because no matter how much you had hurt me I still like you but maybe we should have taken this slower”
Hawks was hurt like his heart was breaking “so you don’t want to be with me because you think I’m a monster”
“I didn’t say that-”
“No, but that’s how you see me”
Demitri didn’t respond how could he? Hawks was mad and raised his voice which scared the shit out of him. He was like a deer in headlights.
Hawks nodded and walked out of the room accepting the end of the relationship he was hurt but he didn’t want anyone else to see that.