Work Text:
July 2018
Yuuji hears something that sounds vaguely like a siren outside the front door, when he's in the kitchen fridge, hunting for a drink.
Panicked by a possible unexpected visitor (he's pretty sure The Strongest Jujutsu Sorcerer does not sound like a siren), Yuuji drops to the floor to hide in the gap between the kitchen island and the wall. This spot is not so visible to someone coming in from the entrance hallway, so Yuuji has some cover instead of full exposure. He's still supposed to be dead and all.
He listens intently, crouched and ready to pounce if necessary. The sound of the door opening. The sounds of a person taking off their shoes. And the sound of small…feet?
"Raowrr."
A fluffy white cat trots into view, dropping its butt on the floor next to Yuuji. The teenager stares at the cat, which stares back with sparkling blue eyes.
"Rrrwwoow," says the cat, sounding not quite like a siren but close enough. The white fur coat is a squishy tangle.
"Itadori-kun?"
Yuuji blinks. He drags his eyes up and away from the cat to look at the speaker, who at once sounded both familiar and strange. Oh. Oh no. Shock must be written all over Yuuji's face, because Nanami moves onto an explanation before waiting for a proper greeting.
"I was on a mission," the adult says. "Your teacher decided to tag along, and an accident happened."
The longer Yuuji stares at Nanami, the weirder the stuff happening in Yuuji's head becomes, so he drops his gaze back down at the animal. Currently, the white cat reclines on his back, stretching with a wide yawn.
"So," says Yuuji, coming to a realization. "That's Gojou-sensei."
"Unfortunately," replies Nanami.
Technically, there are a lot of problems that Yuuji should be thinking about right now with his teacher in this state. But the Biggest Problem Yuuji is experiencing right now is that 'Nanamin' is a tall, blonde woman with a big butt.
…Like Jennifer Lawrence.
The fifteen year-old pauses to consider the situation. Rather, his brain has blue screened and struggles to reboot. He feels like his internal hard drive has a file somewhere that says, "Don't thirst for Nanamin!" but he doesn't know where it is. The file may have been written one weird morning when Gojou talked about Nanami and about man boobs. ("Completely unrelated," said Gojou, flinging his hands up.)
The most reasonable and easy thing that Yuuji can say on autopilot is, "Have you seen Ieiri-san yet?"
His sunglasses are absent, but Nanami looks about the same in facial features? Maybe slightly rounder? Yuuji isn't too sure if his brain is playing tricks on him. The blonde sorcerer grimaces. It's the same thin line of a mouth and furrowing of the brows.
"She is out of the Tokyo metropolitan area and will not be back until tomorrow at best. Another school-affiliated doctor checked us over, but did not see physical damage or otherwise unusual conditions."
But this is a super unusual condition, isn't it?! Yuuji stares at the furball on the floor to avoid staring at Not Jennifer Lawrence. He's pretty sure his teacher isn't supposed to be flicking a fluffy tail to clean the floor, however unintentional the cleaning may be. Yuuji is also pretty sure his teacher thinks this whole thing is hilarious.
In the absence of a thought, Yuuji picks up Cat Gojou. And then, because he has spent his self-control elsewhere, Yuuji looks up at Nanami and dares to say out loud, "Nyanamin."
The cat in his arms guffaws.
The mission was a solo assignment.
Nanami informed Gojou of this fact, but the truth repelled from the infinite idiocy around Gojou's head.
"How could you go to a bathhouse without me, Nana-mi," the twenty-eight year old man complained, whining the last syllable of Nanami's name.
"This is work, not leisure," replied the Adult of Adults flatly. "Do not tag along on a mission because you want to ogle naked bodies."
"The sentou is an experience, Nanami~! Taking a long hot soak after a good scrub, baking it all out in the sauna, drinking strawberry milk after, even the Mount Fuji picture to stare at until you're so relaxed you could go down the drain! Ijichi landed you a good mission!"
"We are not here to bathe."
In Ex-Salaryman Nanami's opinion, the location was an extremely poor choice for a bathhouse. The lack of other visitor-heavy businesses in the vicinity or residential buildings in the neighborhood meant limited foot traffic. Coupled with the uninviting atmosphere of a dark alley at night, the bathhouse was unlikely to be a stop for people passing by.
The people who could find it were customers via a website, contacted through email, and physically mailed a dangling earring that pointed the way after leaving the nearest train station. Ijichi told Nanami that an aura of cursed energy appeared to emanate from the bathhouse itself, during his brief observation period. The bathhouse had an extra amulet hanging above the traditional bathhouse entrance curtain.
"It seems to work as a ward, keeping normal people from noticing and entering," muttered Gojou. With the blindfold on, the man's eyes weren't visible, but the white-haired sorcerer was likely looking everywhere for clues and details.
Nanami stepped forward, hand parting the curtain. He ducked to clear the door frame; Gojou would need to stoop.
The lobby was very normal. Nanami had visited public bathhouses a handful of times; this place was very much like the other ones, featuring a small reception counter flanked on each side by entrances to male and female changing areas. Against the wall on the right side of the lobby was a vending machine and shoe lockers.
Internally, Nanami sighed. He made a mental note to buy a mango milk and a coffee milk later.
Reception featured a distracted man swiping at his phone. He's middle-aged and completely nondescript, with a perfectly forgettable face. When he finally looked up after Gojou made his way through the entrance, the man narrowed his eyes.
Nanami thought, he's sharp.
Then, something exploded.
The blonde sorcerer immediately closed his hand around the hilt of his weapon, hidden under his blazer. Smoke billowed from every direction in the lobby, flooding the air until nothing could be seen short of being directly in one's face. Loud explosions followed, a deafening cacophony of noise.
Gojou pressed into the back of Nanami's shoulder, spreading his infinity. The cursed technique warded off the smoke, and muffled the noise just a bit.
"I can warp sound waves," Gojou stated cheerfully. "Adjusted enough to still let them through in case I need to hear something important."
There's no burning heat, nor was there the smell of anything ignited. "Speakers," muttered the blonde man. Without Gojou's infinity, he would be inaudible in the din. Smoke to obfuscate the view; speakers blaring explosion noises to cover any sound trail. In low visibility, finding the electronics would be time-consuming.
"I'll check the women's changing room," said Gojou, quickly darting out of reach.
The return of the barrage of loud noises did nothing to soothe his flare of exasperation. Gritting his teeth, Nanami headed in the general direction of the men's changing room. At least he had a glimpse of the door before this distraction began.
At least, the speakers seemed to be in the lobby only. The noise stayed behind as Nanami moved further in. The discrepancy in sound was the most noticeable aspect of the changing room, which lacked any noise whatsoever. Nobody was there; the belongings lockers were empty, the shelves of fresh towels neatly stacked. In the used towels hamper, the bottom featured a scant two.
Gaining access to this particular bathhouse involved dipping into some questionable internet places, Ijichi informed Nanami with a shudder. A bathhouse existed to serve customers, cursed or not. The information about what the bathhouse did, however, was too vague to discern its process or service. From the state of the changing room, Nanami hypothesized that the service was either prohibitively expensive, keeping the customers at a minimum. Or the service was niche, which brought strange customers to the door.
What lay in the bathing area, then?
The racket of the lobby faded as Nanami opened the sliding door to the bathing area, a room awash in blue tile. The typical painting of Mount Fuji loomed over the space from the far wall. Steam curled in the air from simmering tubs. To his right, the dividing wall between the men's and women's bathing area cleared just above his head. Nanami heard the sound of running water from the other side, but nothing else.
His gaze swept the male side of the bathing area again. Unlike normal bathhouses, there's only one washing station in the center of the space. Instead of the usual three large tubs, the number of tubs squeezed into the bathing area totaled nine.
Wooden plaques hung off the side of each tub. Frowning, Nanami cautiously approached one, stooping slightly to lift the plaque with his free hand.
"Tub of the Drowned Woman," he read aloud.
A loud clatter startled him. Senses dialed to their most alert, Nanami straightened and stepped away from the tub, sensing Gojou's familiar cursed energy from the women's side of the bathing area.
And then, he could also discern just a sliver of unfamiliar cursed energy.
His shoe slipped on water. His balance went awry. His leg strength mysteriously failed at this moment. His arms somehow moved too slowly to rebalance his upper body.
A lot of coincidences happened in unison to send Nanami tumbling into the 'Tub of the Drowned Woman'.
The size of his body ensured a magnificent splash. Bubbling under the surface for a brief second, Nanami broke back into air. In spite of how undignified the fall was, he maintained enough dignity not to sputter upon emerging from the water.
Something hadn't been right with that tumble, he thought. He grasped the side of the tub and dragged himself to his feet, shoes be damned, water dripping aplenty from his soaked clothes. His pants were…sliding down? Nanami glanced down to check—
"Oi, Na…nami…"
Nanami looked up. An unconscious man hung limply with his butt in the air on the dividing wall. Floating above the wall was the completely pristine menace known as Gojou Satoru. Though right now his mouth was shaped in an O of surprise rather than glee.
Nanami's shirt was completely soaked. His new extra bits were extremely visible.
Gojou's faltering expression reshaped into a terrifying, delighted grin in a flat second. His phone comes out instantly.
"Gojou Satoru!" snapped Nanami, face flushing completely crimson.
The strongest sorcerer cackled. "Don't be like that, Na-na-mi~!" The shutter sound from his phone fired without pause. "You look hot! Sexy! Gorgeous!"
But just as abruptly, the phone shutter stopped.
"Actually," Gojou mused, "how would I look?"
"He dove into the tub next to the one I fell in. Unfortunately, it turned him into a cat."
Yuuji sits attentively, hands carefully arranged on his lap. At this point in Nanami's recollection, Yuuji casts a long look at the cat lazing on the table in front of them. Cat Gojou purrs contently from slow petting under Nanami's hand.
He will have to keep pretending he isn't weirded out by, well, everything. "So, um, what…was the bathhouse, exactly?"
"According to the operator, the bathhouse served people's fantasies of 'being someone or something else'," Nanami answers. "We learned that much from his online communications, we were unsure of the method."
Pondering, Yuuji absently reaches forward and scratches the bottom of Cat Gojou's chin. "Just the bathing tubs were cursed?"
"The bathhouse operator used his own cursed technique on the bathing areas too."
"Eh?" The teenager perks up. He's still learning about the jujutsu world, after all. "What was his technique?"
Sighing, Nanami finally stops petting the ball of fluff and pushes his—her?—chair back. "The curse user called his technique, 'Accidents Happen'. He cannot control what accident happens, so the technique is not very useful in direct combat, but it is useful for traps or defenses."
"Raooowwrr…"
Yuuji stops scratching Cat Gojou and brings his hand to his own chin instead, rubbing thoughtfully. "Nanamin, you slipped and fell, does it have something to do with that?"
Nanami's face is still angles and sharpness, but the frown smooths away and Yuuji thinks he might be seeing just a hint of a smile.
Oh. It is a smile, if the tiniest he's seen from Nanami so far.
"Very good."
Of course, just then the fed-up Cat Gojou has to try and paw at Nanami's face.
Originally, Yuuji was supposed to help prepare dinner. But Nanami found out that Gojou had been slacking in his instruction of high school mathematics.
So now Yuuji is sitting at the dinner table, cat curled in one arm and pencil in his free hand, struggling with this stupid geometry problem. Nanami bustles in Gojou's kitchen.
Earlier, the grade one sorcerer took a pair of scissors, dug out an extra blindfold from Gojou's closet, and neatly cut a strip from the cloth. Said strip currently covers the cat's eyes, making Cat Gojou look marginally more like his human self.
"Gojou-sensei, if you sit like that you look fat, you know? Not to mention you're kinda heavy so I guess you really are a fat cat–ow!"
"Good observation, Itadori-kun," comes Nanami's disembodied voice from behind the open fridge door. "I will make a smaller portion for your teacher."
"Newhrrrr," complains Cat Gojou, jumping onto the table top. His tail swishes angrily, knocking into Yuuji's textbook.
"If you are noisy, you will interfere with Itadori-kun's concentration."
Said fifteen year old is experiencing a second super weird feeling in his gut today. On the bright side, this weird feeling does not involve gawking like some shameless middle school boy with no restraint (though, reasons Yuuji, it's not as if high school boys are any better—he would know) at someone that Yuuji very much respects. On the not so bright side, Yuuji vaguely wonders if he's reading too much into things, or maybe he's not nearly adult enough to pick up on nuances.
He watches Cat Gojou continue howling like a siren and Nanami steadfastly ignoring the ruckus to manage the stove, the cutting board, the cabinet, and the sink like an unperturbed master of his domain.
Maybe Nanami cooks in Gojou's kitchen often. Maybe he also does his laundry here? Would that really explain how Nanami knows exactly which part of Gojou's closet has the special grade sorcerer's eye masks?
Angel Fushiguro pops into existence on Yuuji's shoulder. The angel's oversized white t-shirt is pristine, and he speaks in monotone. "If you ask Nanami-san honestly, he will give you an honest answer."
Devil Kugisaki twirls to life on Yuuji's other shoulder, swathed in some cloud of black that Yuuji assumes is his brain's representation of high fashion. "Naw, he'll probably sanitize the answer until it's fit for babies. Ask Gojou! That bigmouth would spill ALL the beans."
"Gojou-sensei can't talk right now," remarks Angel Fushiguro dryly, "which is a blessing."
"They're totally banging." Confident, Devil Kugisaki stomps on Yuuji's shoulder. "Ask Nanami-san if he knows where the condoms are."
No, Yuuji is definitely not asking that. Nanami would forgive a few weird questions from a teenager but Yuuji wants to keep the man's respect.
But he feels confident that Angel Fushiguro, Devil Kugisaki, and he all agree that yes, their teacher and Nanami are in some kind of relationship. And Yuuji also feels safe in thinking that it's probably not just friendship.
This thought is not a relief, since it spawns a bunch of images that Yuuji could have done without. Who's on top? Would Gojou do it with the Nanami now? What about as a cat?
Yuuji slumps over the math problem while said cat continues yelling over his head. He really shouldn't have let his brain go down that route.
Dinner is cozy.
Nanami is a great cook. Yuuji learned this courtesy of the two weeks Gojou spent abroad during which the teenager slept in Nanami's guest bedroom. The grade one sorcerer has a swanky condo in a stylish building, not that close to the school campus but not that deep into metropolitan Tokyo either. Yuuji's impression of Nanami's place is that it is unexpectedly warm and cozy feeling, rather much like its owner.
The teenager chews his vegetables, eyes straying from the blonde adult to the fluffy duster eating on the dinner table. Cat Gojou has his head buried in a shallow bowl, consuming some sort of cooked mix by Nanami. Next to the meal is another bowl, filled about three quarters of the way with water.
He recalls an old middle school classmate's complaints about her family cat's diet, so Yuuji comments, "Gojou-sensei, if you don't drink any water, you're going to suffer when you poop."
Across the table, Nanami's chopsticks pause halfway from his bowl to his mouth.
Cat Gojou lifts his head. Bits of food cling to his whiskers and the fur on his face. One particular clump perches on his mini blindfold, right where his left eye would be. "Nrao."
"…Digestion is a difficult subject for dinner, Itadori-kun."
"Sorry, I just wanted Sensei to get some water." He should have stopped there, but his curiosity and big mouth run away from him again. "Uh, is Gojou-sensei going to use the normal toilet?"
After a long second, Cat Gojou morphs into Siren Gojou again. Without a doubt, he is the noisiest cat Yuuji has ever met. "RraRrarrWWW raAWRrr—"
Nanami presses his lips into a thin line. "One thing at a time, Itadori-kun. We can worry about that after dinner."
"But what if Gojou-sensei poops on the table?" exclaims Devil Kugisaki from Yuuji's shoulder. "While eating? Right now?"
Yuuji can only imagine the long face Angel Fushiguro has. "Gojou-sensei is a nuisance sometimes but he is not THAT ridiculous," the angel replies, albeit in a self-doubting tone.
"What if being a cat is affecting his brain?" Devil Kugisaki jumps off Yuuji and strolls on the table, eyeing the wailing cat with great suspicion.
"I've never ate cat before," declares the mouth that appears on Yuuji's left hand. It grins maliciously. "But I can start now."
This dinner is getting too crowded. Yuuji hurriedly slaps his hand. He grins both sheepishly and nervously at Nanami. "Sorry."
The blonde man is unflappable. Yuuji can see the beginnings of a very big, very long sigh in Nanami's face though. "Do you need to eat more to sustain him, or does he eat on his own?"
"Uh," Yuuji says.
"RaawWWRrRr!" Siren Gojou raises his volume, indignant. Yuuji suspects his teacher is annoyed at the idea that his food intake has to be limited, while Sukuna gets any food suggestion at all.
Nanami gives Cat Gojou a most unimpressed look.
A strange warmth blooms in Yuuji's heart.
How long ago was it, before his grandpa had to stay long term in a hospital ward? Only about four months? Five? It's been so long, Yuuji is almost afraid he forgot what the small comfort of a family dinner was like.
If he hadn't met Fushiguro, right now he might have been sitting alone in an empty house.
The teenager definitely had doubts when Cat Gojou glided midair past him. But Yuuji is thirsty, so he fills his glass of water in the kitchen first.
He returns to the hallway to glimpse a damp, towel-only Nanami poking out of the bathroom door. Yuuji almost drops his glass—it does slip his fingers but he has the superhuman reflexes to catch it before it falls very far. The strangled noise he makes, however, is not overlooked.
"…Itadori-kun."
"...Yes?" Don't look at the toned arm. Don't look at the sliver of side boob. Do look at the smug-faced cat held by the scruff of his neck.
Gojou-sensei, you're a filthy pervert. If Kugisaki saw this, she would put nails through each of your eyes.
"He needs a hug," says Nanami, in a tone so dry Yuuji can see a desert beyond the door. "Take him to watch a movie, please."
"Um. Okay. I mean yes."
Cat Gojou is thus deposited into Yuuji's free arm, and the bathroom door clicks shut.
He stands blankly in the hallway for at least ten seconds. Then Yuuji finally looks at the blindfolded cat and tells him, "Gojou-sensei, I do not respect you."
"…Meow."
"Curling up and playing cute is not going to help you," answers Yuuji, heading for the basement. When he flicks the light switch, he wonders if he can get the boxing bear doll to punch a cat. The teenager settles on his viewing couch, one annoying furball held in his lap.
"Hey, Gojou-sensei…"
Staring at a sleazy-looking cat with a blindfold makes Yuuji lose his words. Cat Gojou can barely communicate anything outside of yelling; the teenager doubts he'll get anything useful.
"Coward!" hisses Devil Kugisaki. "At least ask where the porn stash is."
Under normal circumstances, one could consider the actions of Gojou Satoru (even in cat form) sexual harassment.
Except, they have something of a weird relationship, so Cat Gojou jumping up onto the edge of the tub to watch Nanami bathe is in the vague category of Things That Are Technically Part of This Relationship.
Nanami takes satisfaction from throwing Gojou out.
To be frank, he is not particularly irritated or angry about Gojou's various transgressions—Nanami has long since gotten used to those. If a worry persists from Nanami over the current situation, it would be the blatantness of their exposure to Itadori.
He's under no delusion that Itadori, being a full fledged fifteen year old, is innocent and pure. Under normal circumstances, Itadori would have been flooding his chat group with stickers and messages and photos of a preening, shameless cat. Except, Itadori has to pretend he is dead, so his social life as of this moment consists of holing up with movies, getting flipped in training by his teacher, or getting pranked by his teacher.
But Nanami doubts he has answers to the questions Itadori probably wants to ask, looking as cautiously curious between his teacher and the grade one sorcerer as he had all dinner. Questions that Nanami set aside long ago about the relationship between him and Gojou. The only sure answer Nanami has may be that he will not recommend such an entanglement.
The water is warm. It distorts the view of his body, but Nanami is still keenly aware he is currently not a man.
Originally, he thought Gojou would be unable to take care of Itadori properly considering his situation. So Nanami came to stay overnight, hopefully producing a better plan by tomorrow. Instead, he has made Itadori uncomfortable.
Good thing the water is warm and comfortable. Otherwise Nanami would be up and hunting for a drink. The bath is doing its best to counter his self-flagellation, but his thoughts turn towards the depressing still.
He leans back and closes his eyes, letting the bathtub rim cradle his head.
This will not last, Nanami says to himself mentally. There are many good and logical reasons not to step any further. Those nights are for stress relief and bodily needs. He cannot justify a proper, serious relationship while he may walk into death any day. And he does not want to leave Gojou with another emotional scar.
Well, Nanami might be a bit presumptuous to think himself capable of leaving any sort of scar on Gojou.
"Nanamin," Itadori begins. The clock on the wall reads eleven-forty. "Are you and Gojou-sensei dating?"
Joining Itadori for the movie after the bath was a simple enough affair. Itadori seemed to have gotten over his residual awkwardness from the situation, and Nanami knew he could not dodge the questions forever. But, he had decided the answer when he got out of the bathroom.
"No."
The cat, curled up in the space between Itadori and Nanami, thrashes just a little bit.
Some time past midnight, both Yuuji in his room and Nanami on the living room couch are asleep.
Cat Gojou, who had taken the opportunity to nap earlier, slinks around in the dark. He clambers up onto his coffee table and sits, tail flicking almost soundlessly. He stares at the glowing shape beyond his makeshift blindfold.
Gojou spent a lot of money on that dumb couch, so that he could lie down straight on it comfortably. Nanami (being shorter than Gojou as a man, and now missing another three centimeters as a woman) will have no problems sleeping comfortably on the couch too.
Except, he's already been in Gojou's bed before? So why is he sleeping on the couch?? Also, what sort of rational decision-making chain is one where they are 'not dating' but he's wearing Gojou's clothes to sleep???
The cat scowls. His tail swishes faster.
Nanami breathes evenly, undisturbed by the duster glaring at him from less than a meter away.
Cat Gojou is not going to pretend he doesn't want to jump Nanami's bones right now, but he's a cat. That means no matter how sexy Nanami might look as a woman, they're not going to engage in their 'not dating' activities.
He did get a chance to do some vengeful cat kneading on Nanami's chest earlier. The sorcerer had tolerated it without a word of complaint, which was unusual. Instead, Nanami spent that time giving Gojou a vaguely sad look that took a lot out of the glee of pawing at Nanami's woman boobs.
...All right let's not wait for Shouko, let's break the curse.
Cat Gojou pads around in a circle, ruminating. Transformation curses don't tend to last long without a source of cursed energy to sustain the transformation. For largely harmless transformations like these (not turning into aggressive creatures is a good thing), they and the doctor don't have much to worry about. The usual expectation is that they will return to normal after the cursed tubs at the bathhouse are exorcised, or when the cursed energy fueling the transformation runs out.
Transfiguration is a different story. Gojou's eyes tell him that's not what the tubs did, at least. (It's half the reason he had no problem splashing into another tub. Other than the new curves, Nanami looked healthy in every way.)
Honestly, they could have smashed up the bathhouse, but the individual tubs need more investigation to figure out who the victims were. Under interrogation, the bathhouse operator has claimed the human participants were willing to commit suicide to make those tubs. But even if they were willing, that doesn't excuse the loss of life and the curses created. Especially not for that scumbag's personal profit.
He makes the jump from coffee table to couch arm. Wow, what impeccable balance these animals have. Cat Gojou pads his way up the back of the couch to Nanami's face without disturbing the sleeping sorcerer at all. That's good; it means he can do this.
Gojou leans his smushed cat face in and pecks Nanami on the lips.
Oh? Hmm. So that's how to clear up the curse?
He's back on the coffee table, sensing fluctuations in both of their cursed energies. Sure enough, Cat Gojou stretches out on his belly, and finds himself in human form again in the same position. Luckily, his clothes are completely intact if a bit soggy.
Gojou absolutely asserts that he looks just as cute as his cat self.
Meanwhile, Nanami barely twitches in his sleep as his body fills out his borrowed clothes.
"Na~nami, let's go back to the bathhouse and you can dunk yourself in that same tub again."
The blonde man has scarcely opened his eyes for longer than thirty seconds before Gojou is talking somewhere over his face. Some words are indeed escaping Gojou's mouth, but Nanami fails to understand them in a meaningful way. Somewhere on his left, the beginnings of sunlight illuminate the ceiling.
"Excuse me?"
Gojou peers down with a grave expression. A rarity made even more rare because of his missing blindfold. "I want to try doing it while your body is female."
"I am leaving," announces Nanami. He throws the blanket aside, briefly wonders how he ended up in a bed instead of waking on the couch, then dismisses the thoughts in favor of simply Getting the Hell Out of There.
Except Gojou wraps his arms around Nanami's waist and clings like a leech.
"I can get in too and we can have sex while we're both–"
Nanami reminds himself that Gojou no longer being a cat is A Good Thing. He also considers returning to normal A Good Thing. But he supposes the real problem is that 'this' is what is considered the status quo: the strongest jujutsu sorcerer also being the greatest idiot in the crotch.
A part of Nanami also despairs just a little. He is not sure what he is supposed to feel about Gojou's eagerness to spice up sex, or Gojou's desire to bed his female body. Either tendency is a sign that the blonde man cannot keep Gojou's interest forever.
"No," answers Nanami bluntly. "You can find a female partner."
In an instant Gojou changes from pleading to indignant. "First we're not dating and now you're telling me to find other partners?!"
"What we do is not dating. Most of the times we meet outside of work is for sex."
Gojou falls silent. A not-quite-constipated look appears on his face, and his eyes roll up in a manner telling of actual thought being put into recollecting their encounters.
Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, Nanami tugs free of the white-haired man's grasp and stands. He glances sideways at the windows, and sighs. "That is how it started in school, and how we have been for the past few years."
They do not curl up in bed and have pillow talk after the deed. If not sex, then Gojou comes demanding food or a favor, like when he asked Nanami to take care of Itadori. Nanami is not hoping for more. He cannot quite bring himself to say it is only a friends with benefits relationship, since it is slightly more complicated than that. But from an objective standpoint, is there any other way to describe this?
"Nanami."
"Why me?"
"…Any body is fine really, it's just sex."
With words from the past echoing in his thoughts, Nanami pads over to the bathroom.
"I will make breakfast," he says, softly, and closes the door behind him.
Yuuji can almost cry with relief, but that feeling might have come too early.
"Gojou-sensei, you were way cuter as a cat."
The twenty-eight year old pouts. "Yuuji, is it bad influence from that man over there? You're becoming as cold as Megumi."
"Sensei, you were peeping on Nanamin bathing last night. I don't think you can blame others as bad influences."
On his side of the table, Nanami eats slowly, ignoring the somewhat improper conversation. Yuuji finds himself staring at Nanami's back-to-normal male chest. Which, if he really thinks about it, is also quite big and possibly soft? Things sure have gotten complicated since yesterday.
Then again...Yuuji's eyes flick to Gojou, who is inhaling his breakfast. Yes, his teacher is definitely the type that would have a pinup poster of Nanami if he could. Yuuji might be understanding their complicated relationship a bit better.
"You're still going to get checked out by Ieiri-san, right?" The teenager experiences a quick, unbidden thought. "Were your, um, organs also different?"
"We attempted scans, but the curse interfered with the technology."
"Shouko is going to love the glowing cat shadow on the x-ray," Gojou blabs. "I think she should frame it and hang it on the wall."
Nanami sighs. "Itadori-kun, we will make an appointment with Ieiri-san. Your teacher will be fine."
"I hope you'll be okay too, Nanamin."
Like a forgotten needy pet, Gojou grumbles incoherently around his food.
As Yuuji sees them off at the entrance, he watches as Gojou hands Nanami his keys to lock the door. He's seen a lot of bad movies by now, including some mediocre romance ones. He thinks just maybe–
"Hey kid, what's up with that guy's chest when he was a woman? Never seen 'em that big except in those dumb pictures you've looked at while I've been here. Didn't know that shit could be real–"
Yuuji slaps Sukuna quiet. Having a voyeur curse living inside him is annoying. "You've seen a bunch of people that look like that in movies!"
Sukuna scoffs from Yuuji's other cheek. "That stuff in the box ain't real people. It's fake cursed tool drawing shit isn't it?"
The long-suffering teenager sighs deeply. He's almost, almost tempted to ask the much older Sukuna about the relationship between his teacher and his 'not-teacher', but Yuuji gets the strong feeling that that will not be a fruitful conversation.
Adults are so immature sometimes. In retrospect, Yuuji feels almost proud he didn't gawk at Nanami's butt too much.
Gojou has a startling revelation while staring at Nanami's butt. To be fair, he is staring into space and Nanami's butt just happened to be there. Luckily, he has a blindfold on, so no one can tell where his eyeballs are pointing at.
He is keenly aware that yes, most of the time they meet, it's for sex. Somewhere along the way, this thing just became comfortable. Reassuring. Reliable. It's lasted longer than any other sexual or vaguely romantic relationship Gojou had.
And Gojou has gotten dumb cozy with the present situation, like those bastard higher ups with the current jujutsu society. He forgot to stop and think about the future, or what could be better. Instead, he has come to think of Nanami as a convenient, stable rock, one that he doesn't need to worry about. Nanami himself has never complained, so Gojou has taken him for granted.
But it can't be that simple. Gojou restarted their sexual escapades on a whim, but Nanami could have refused him then. Could have refused him any time for the past three years.
"There's a few remaining traces of foreign cursed energy, but physically you seem to be completely normal. The traces themselves don't seem to be doing anything other than dissipating. I'd say you're good to go."
"Thank you, Ieiri-san."
The doctor leans back in her chair, narrowing her eyes at the two of them. She looks amused. "I would have liked to see you as a woman, Nanami."
"No, that is quite all right."
"I have a few pictures," Gojou pipes up. He emerges from his strange reverie. "Wanna see? Yuuji got the ones of me as the cutest cat ever, I'll get him to show you later."
"Excuse me," says Nanami.
He is soundly ignored. Gojou slides over with his phone, which miraculously survived the bathhouse.
Shouko whistles appreciatively. "Wow Nanami, you were well endowed in every way, I bet Gojou would have ended up with a flat chest and no ass."
Gojou recoils, hackles raised indignantly, "I'll go dunk myself right now, I would get huge knockers–"
Wisely, Nanami plucks the man's phone from Shouko's hands, gives it back to Gojou, then pushes him out the door of the infirmary. "We will see you again some time, have a pleasant day," bidding farewell to a merrily chuckling doctor.
Cozy and comfortable. A partner that Gojou imagines maybe, just maybe, what a spouse would feel like. Would be like.
He thinks about arranged marriage interviews, about the handful of people he spun wheels with after school and before whatever this is. And then he thinks about Nanami's return and the curious feelings that came along with that.
Oh, Gojou realizes with a jolt, I'm actually twenty-eight years old.
There were some things that faded over the years, hope that finally died and was replaced by resolve. Gojou Satoru changed.
In the hallway, Gojou turns around and takes Nanami's hand into his, twining their fingers together. Nanami blinks, peering at the white-haired man with a raised eyebrow.
The Strongest grins, impish. "Let's go get some ice cream!"
Two years ago, the tenth anniversary of his first failed mission passed. Since that day, he's become older, more bitter, more biting, eternally struggling with his dream of change. The teenager Gojou was back then was looking for 'allies', strong sorcerers who could align with his goal.
The adult he is right now has realized 'strength' comes in different shapes and sizes. His perspective is broader, and he's made connections that sometimes surprise him in unexpected ways.
The person he is now…His happiness will be found in a different kind of love. One that he thinks—hopes—he can grow old with.
"Get some ice cream for Itadori-kun too," Nanami reminds Gojou.
"As long as you don't pick the flavor," Gojou replies cheerfully. "My taste in flavors is way superior to yours."
The fingers curled around his are calloused, rough from physical training and combat. Nanami doesn't pull away.
"Ne, Nanami, we should go back to the bathhouse and see how cleanup crew is handling it."
"...I am going to get ice cream. You can go become a drowned pig by yourself."
"Don't you want to see me as a sexy woman?"
"No."
Nope, Gojou won't be able to convince Nanami the value of that. As he semi-pulls the blonde man along, Gojou feels, through their linked hands, that convincing Nanami that they're actually dating might not be so hard.