Chapter Text
Seungwoo met him in Seoul.
When he first came to the new and modern city, Seungsik was the one that guided him and helped him.
They met for the first time on the university's largest campus with over a thousand students.
And there was Seungwoo, quiet and reserved in the corner of the auditorium at the music class.
Seungsik had walked up to him on his own, talked to him, and with time Seungwoo opened up without realizing it. One by one, Seungsik introduced him to his friends who equally welcomed him, and slowly Seungwoo was meddling into them as a cheerful, yet quiet eldest friend.
Seungwoo found out what friendship meant through a guy named Kang Seungsik,
Through the coffees they shared, even if they had the same drink- they always tasted from each other's straw just for the fun of it.
Through the notebooks where countless equations and numericals were trapped alongside a small 'Seungwoo ♡ Seungsik'
Through the walks in the garden behind the university, and through each and every time Seungsik smiled at him that signature smile of his.
Gradually, he didn't even realize how those feelings of friendship turned into deeper feelings.
And then suddenly, Seungwoo had fallen for the latter.
But it seemed that Seungsik didn't reciprocate his feelings. It was just his hunch, his sixth-sense, or whatever you call it. But Seungsik was always holding his hand, or laughing with him about something stupidly absurd like it didn't matter that Seungwoo's feelings were eating him up inside.
He was stuck between confessing and between keeping it to himself because holding it in was getting tougher but he couldn't dare risk being away from the prettiest boy in the world to him.
Nothing in this world could compare to Seungsik and his mere presence.
So it hurt Seungwoo a lot when he placed a heavy boulder on his heart and took the step to return back home. He knew it would hurt Seungsik, but its better than to see him everyday and not be able to say 'I like you so much'
He's sure he will move on once he leaves and he was kind of right.
Seungwoo didn't think of Seungsik as much as he did with the guy around him, he spent time in singing and working at his father's business as a co-director. For 2 years, he worked hard and kept himself busy to the point that the only time he remembered Seungsik was when he's had too much to drink,
And a familiar voice rings in his head, 'I miss you, hyung'
That was when Seungsik had called him the first time after he reached Busan,
"Is it alright there? Did you meet up with your family?"
Seungwoo had gulped down the lump in his throat, hearing his voice over the line made his heart beat so fast,
"It's okay. I arrived at home so I've met everyone already. You should stay safe too, okay? Graduate well, and I'll try to come at your graduation too."
He noticed the silence, it was obvious Seungsik was sulking,
"I miss you, hyung. Did you really have to do this? Everyone misses you so much."
Seungwoo desperately wants to say, 'Yes, I had to. You were becoming more and more beautiful everyday. It was getting harder to contain myself. I thought my graduation might put a bit space between us but I only found us coming closer'
Instead of a thousand words, he just replied, "I miss everyone too," when he wanted to say "I miss you too, Seungsik" and so much more,
"Don't worry, you guys will get used to it" the conversation carried on casually.
2 years of non-stop work and music, and now he decided to suddenly return.
He stares out the window of the train, eyeing the numerous trees that passed by with the journey. Seungwoo is so thrilled to see how much Seungsik has grown in these 2 years, how has he changed? Did he make any new friends? How are the rest of the guys?
And the thought passes over his head that what if...Seungsik has a partner?
A romantic partner?
He shakes it away, trying to keep his mood good and cheery.
The Seoul air welcomes him and Seungwoo smiles small, he missed this, too. The feeling Seoul had was amazing, and this is why he decided to open a branch of Han enterpises in Seoul too,
He walks out the train station, watching his step as he pulls out his phone and calls Seungsik right away.
They had remained in contact through text but nothing had remained the same as before, the messages were short and plain, there was no feeling whatsoever in them.
He waits for the ringing to end and the call is picked up,
"Hello? Hyung?" -fuck, his voice makes Seungwoo shiver and he smiles, shuffling his weight from one feet to another,
"Hey, Seungsik. How have you been?" He asks, trying to keep his excitement at bay when all he wanted was to jump inside his phone and back out at Seungsik's place just to hug him tightly,
"I've been good. What about you? Finally free enough to even call me?"
Well, that makes him a bit guilty because he had spend so much time at work that he barely texted back Seungsik,
"Actually, I'm free enough to even meet you." He said, unable to hold back the smile that stretched over his face and he hears Seungsik gasp really loud through the phone, "Huh?! You're joking, right?"
Seungwoo shakes his head, humming in a rejecting-way, and he hears Seungsik gasp even louder, "Are you in Seoul, Hyung?!" His voice gets loud and Seungwoo chuckles out,
He feels a tightening in his chest, 'No way...I thought we're over this' he thinks to himself
But even if he is over it, he feels a new kind of light-weight feeling on his chest,
"Yes, I am." He said just to hear a squeal from the other side and, "Sejun! Seungwoo Hyung is in Seoul!" he hears chatter and busy murmurs behind Seungsik and it melts his heart,
Seungsik was right.
They all missed him.
"I'm sure you can hear already but Sejun and Byungchan have gone crazy over this news you've bombed on us without a warning!"
Seungwoo laughs lightly, "So, when and where do we meet?"
He hears more chatter in the background and Seungsik's whining to the youngers "Hey, I'm still talking to him! So, let's meet tonight? I'll send you the location for the BBQ place."
Seungwoo hums in agreement, he likes the sound of that,
Actually he likes the sound of anything if he gets to meet Seungsik there but he's so hung up on the idea of moving on from Seungsik that he ignores the constant warnings his heart gives him,
"Sure, I can't wait to see everyone."
Byungchan's voice comes in yelling from the back, "So much to catch up, Hyung!" And Seungwoo grins, "Yeah, so~ much to catch up on."
"I need to handle these hyperactive idiots, let's see each other soon, Hyung"
"See you, Seungsik." - this is what fluttered Seungwoo's heart since day 1.
Seungsik never said "see you later" or "goodbye"
It was always "see you soon" like, he wanted to see Seungwoo sooner than later.
Even little things matter when you have feelings for someone.
Seungwoo leans his back against the wall behind him, it feels like no time passed ever and he was just going to spend another day at the university with his usual friend group,
While also feeling like a hundred years have passed and he has lived his entire life as he finally came to have a re-union with his friends.
But most of all, he's scared of his uncontrollable, and unpredictable heart.
☆☆☆
Seungwoo spots them through the glass windows and the moment he enters through the door, he sees them stand quickly and rush to him with Seungsik being the first one to run to him and wrap his arms around Seungwoo's waist, going over his back with his head placed on the older's chest.
Oh boy, Seungwoo hears a sound in his head go "Game Over" as his stomach drops.
He puts his own arms around Seungsik's shoulders and feels the latter sigh into his chest, a relieved sigh that made it seem like Seungsik's burdens just relieved with a single hug.
It feels heavenly to hold him close like this again.
Then they're being squeezed by 5 other guys, tight and suffocating until Seungwoo gasps, "Let me breathe!" And they all let go with laughs, including Seungsik,
"You've grown taller, Hyung!" Hanse says and Seungwoo stares him up and down, "I should be saying that. You've changed so much, and Subin," he looks at the youngest of the group who has grown so much in this time,
"You're all cool now, huh!" He said and Subin laughs out embarrassed, "Still you and everyone else will find a way to call me cute."
"Byungchan, too. You've bulked up, I'm glad to see you with all these muscles. Sejun looks more handsome," he winks at Sejun, his dimple making an appearance, "And Chan, your style has changed. I like it."
Seungsik interrupts him with a chuckle, "Are you going on a compliment relay right after seeing us? Sit down, atleast!" And as if to just please him, Seungwoo sits down on the nearest chair of their table,
"And Seungsik, you've become so much more cuter. And handsome, and you look so mature." He watches the younger flush like he did 'back in the day'
"Seungsik-ah, your hair look pretty today" the said guy's cheeks tint red in the slightest as he averts Seungwoo's gaze,
"What are you saying, Hyung...geez. I haven't even changed out of my sweaty P.E clothes."
"So, you're a businessman now?" Subin asks and Seungwoo shook his head, watching the meat sizzle in front of him, "Not really but yeah, kind of. It's stressing even as a co-director."
With the few minutes they spent together by now, he found out Seungsik is working as a freelance vocalist and working well underground, Chan is choreographing songs for dance teams, Sejun and Byungchan are modelling at an agency, Hanse writes and raps for musicians time to time and Subin is busy studying his last year.
He's proud of how the boys have kept everything together from their personal lives to their careers.
Seungsik turns the meat over, "That's why you didn't text back as often?" He asks and Seungwoo nodded, "Exactly why. Everytime I picked my phone up, a client suddenly magically appeared" he joked,
"We understand. I knew well you wouldn't forget us anyways." Seungsik said with a knowing smile, and the moment is getting cut off by the ringtone of someone's phone.
Turns out its Seungsik's phone and he looks at Sejun who's sitting beside him, "Handle the meat for a while" he said when his finger swipes the call quite hurriedly to pick up,
"Yeah, Jaeyoung?" A strange and bright smile etched over his face,
'A new name...' Seungwoo thought, his chest burning up with unknown feelings,
"I'm out with friends. I told you about Seungwoo hyung, right? He's in Seoul! Yeah, we're meeting up."
Seungwoo recognizes the dark feeling in the pit of his chest, but ignores it,
Doesn't want to acknowledge it,
That he hates the way a stranger's name rolls off so comfortably over Seungsik's pretty lips,
"Don't worry, I'll be back home soon. Just wait in bed for me, okay? Yeah, bye bye." -as much as Seungwoo is glad he didn't say 'see you later' like he did to Seungwoo, the 'wait in bed for me' part sparked jealousy in him that he ignored yet again by clearing his throat.
It's just a bit of jealousy, I mean I used to be his best friend back then, so its natural - he thinks, trying to console himself and return his focus to the table.
"Seungsik is right, we couldn't forget you and neither could you. We've been through thick and thin together, afterall." Chan said, making room on the table for the dishes that just arrived with piping hot stew. The grilled meat and sausages are done by now, too.
Seungsik hung up the call, and in some absent-minded state,
He touches the fuming pot containing the stew, and hisses, retracting his hand immediately,
and in the blink of an eye, Seungwoo is grabbing his wrist and blowing at the fingertips, worry all over his face from where he was sat opposite of Seungsik.
The skin's just reddened, nothing serious because his skin merely got into contact with the pot but Seungwoo's eyebrows are creased, "Are you okay?" He asks the guy who had his lips parted and eyes blank, an unreadable expression.
"I-I'm fine. You can let go of my hand now, Hyung." He said, trying to reassure only but Seungwoo definitely misunderstood it as he lets go of the wrist, "Sorry," he apologised, "Let's get eating, then? Hanse, tell me about the artists you've worked with."
There, Seungwoo and his habit of switching the subject everytime he felt like the mood was going odd.
These little things make him so lovable.
They talk over lots of different stuff, slowly pouring shot by shot of soju in their glasses. Until all of them are slightly tipsy, while some are a bit more than the rest.
But Seungwoo didn't dare drink more than 2 shots, for he was just too afraid of spilling the truth.
Out of all the contracts he's signed, and clients he has dealt with, only this scares him. The thought that Seungsik might find out about his feelings.
Seungwoo smiles to himself at Seungsik's tinted cheeks as he raised a shot in the air, "Does anyone remember when Sejun almost peed at his pants during the sleepover at Hyung's house?"
Sejun shushes him, clinging to his forearm, "Seungsik-ie hyung, please!"
"What, let me remind everyone your reality! You think you're the most handsome model out there but, but if" Seungwoo stares at him, watching him talk while stuttering over his words little by little,
Even just watching him like this is enough, it feels like time has gone back and they're just normal students,
"If Seungwoo hyung did modelling instead of being a boring businessman, he would be better than you-"
Sejun laughs out at that, "I could never think I'm more handsome than Seungwoo hyung" and the said man just shakes his head, "You're the most handsome, Sejun-ah."
Byungchan claps his palms together, "Alright, we're leaving. I'm dropping Sejun, Chan and Subin off in a taxi. Seungwoo hyung, I'm sending you Seungsik's location, can you drop him off?"
It's sudden but Seungwoo can't say no to his dear Byungchan, and he nods his head quickly, taking up the offer.
Maybe he can get a glimpse of whoever that Jaeyoung is, too.
"Hanse, you can go with them, too." Byungchan suggests but Hanse just shakes his head, "Xiao is coming to pick me up, I'll get going." He leaves after waving off Seungwoo and giving him a tight hug.
Seungwoo is here for a long time and he told everyone that so they're content, meeting him and less reluctant to let go of him since he would be here anyways.
The eldest of them stands up, pulling out his phone to see the location sent to him already.
He booked his room in a hotel nearby the moment he arrived at Seoul, so all he has to do is go to the hotel and get himself registered physically.
Well, as if any of that matters with Seungsik's arm slung around his shoulder and them walking outside the place to wait for a cab. Seungwoo bids off the rest of the boys, smiling at all of them softly while Seungsik mumbled incoherently something about snoopy and peanuts.
It's adorable.
Seungsik is adorable.
A cab pulls over and Seungwoo seats Seungsik first and then sits himself, "Um, this location first and then the 5-star hotel down the main market lane." He shows his phone to the driver,
Seungsik sighs from beside him, resting his head on Seungwoo's shoulder and maybe Seungwoo should have made some friends in Busan because he's so touch-depraved that his heart jumps at the little action.
He exhales shakily, the car taking them to the destination,
I have to endure, I have to keep it in. I can't fall in this rabbit hole again, I can't- Seungwoo battles mentally, but then Seungsik snuggles into the crook of his neck, still mumbling something about snoopy and Seungwoo doesn't understand the obsession he has with that character suddenly,
Seungwoo loses that battle for the moment and he just puts an arm around Seungsik's back to pull him closer.
Even if its for a moment that Seungsik won't remember tomorrow, he will take advantage and keep them close, whilst imagining them being close like this as something more than just bestfriends.
Fuck, I'm such a fool - Seungwoo is a mess already, and its just the first day.
The car halts at the first stop and Seungwoo gets off, bringing Seungsik with him as they get off the vehicle and Seungwoo bows to the driver, "Just 5 minutes, I'll drop him and come back." The man just nods at him, "Take your time."
Seungwoo appreciates the kindness as he walks up the stairs to the apartment, and his place is on the ground floor so Seungwoo takes them to the door and raises his knuckles to knock,
Once, twice.
"Coming, Seungsik-ie!"
'Seungsik-ie?' Seungwoo's chest burns and his face turns stoic, eyes glaring at the doorway that opens to reveal a guy around the same age as Seungsik, black hair and dark eyes. He's wearing sweatpants and a tank-top and the first thing Seungwoo thinks is 'look at those bare shoulders around my Seungsik' like a weird conservative man in the 60's.
He eyes the guy suspiciously, "You must be Jaeyoung." He said, voice coming out rougher than intended but he blames it on the few shots he had,
"Yeah, I am. Why, do you need anything?" Seungwoo ignores him, walking past him and inside with Seungsik hung on his side, "Where is his bed?" He asks, and Jaeyoung walks into the bedroom. Seungwoo walks inside, and takes Seungsik to the bed, slowly placing him down. First sitting down, then lays him down, taking off his shoe and Jaeyoung sits down beside him to take off the other shoe only for Seungwoo to narrow his eyes at him,
"I'll do it."
"So can I." Jaeyoung said, and Seungwoo takes off his hand of Seungsik's ankle, taking the shoes and socks off himself.
That turns the mood down bad, and Jaeyoung stands up abruptly, "What the hell is your problem, man?!"
Seungwoo stands up, taller than him as he glares down at Jaeyoung, "What is your problem? Keep your hands off him."
As if knowing what pulls Seungwoo's strings Jaeyoung smirks, "Why, he doesn't mind it. And he doesn't belong to you either." Seungwoo clicks his tongue and takes a step closer, "Zip it."
But Jaeyoung only crosses his arms, "Listen, I don't know who you are but I guess you're the new dude that came from Busan or wherever, since I already know all his other friends. This is my house so get out." Seungwoo opens his mouth to speak,
"Plus! You seem drunk. Get out." Jaeyoung repeated himself, he had enough and so did Seungwoo. He glances at Seungsik, and closes his eyes for a moment to calm himself down,
"Okay. But," he starts, "I'm not new. I know Seungsik for about 4 years, so watch your damn mouth." Seungwoo turns on his heel with that and leaves the place.
'This Jaeyoung pisses me off'
The only reason Seungwoo backed down is because he remembered the kind driver waiting for him, and he sits back in the backseat, wanting to rip out Jaeyoung's face while the other man wanted to do the same.
But then Seungwoo thinks,
That even if somehow Jaeyoung even was Seungsik's boyfriend- then in what place is Seungwoo in to behave like that? He's too much of a coward to admit his feelings, he can't just be jealous of Seungsik finding happiness.
Or can he?