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Catra is trudging through the Whispering Woods, alone. Her stupid, idiotic, useless tablet has stopped recieving a signal. She was supposed to just go out, find some cool First One’s thing, and bring it back. Now, she's stuck in the middle of these crowded woods. Why the hell does nothing ever work out for her? She grips the tablet hard with her hands. It only shows her a purple screen, displaying some static. She yells into the darkness of the trees, out of frustration, out of failure, and throws the tablet into an exposed root beneath her. The screen shatters, and the tablet bends in the center because of the force; it stops showing her static. Great. Now she broke the goddamn tablet. Catra groans, she feels so stupid.
She hears something. A snap of a stick, maybe. Someone is here. Catra quickly releases her stance and lowers onto all fours, and starts quietly walking through the bushes. She’s so willing for a fight right now. Throwing the tablet didn’t release enough frustration. The snapping sticks become louder, and she can hear boots thudding into the soft ground. She stands, and looks over a tall bush, and spots her. She-Ra. Fan-fucking-tastic. At least she can mess with her to get out some of her pent-up rage. She follows, far enough away so She-Ra wouldn’t be able to hear her, but close enough that she can always watch She-Ra closely. Adora never had good senses anyway, always being so naive and focused. She was never able to tell if someone was following her
~
Adora stumbles through the Whispering Woods, alone. Well, She-Ra is. She needs to go fast, she needs to help Glimmer. The longer she takes, the more Glimmer will suffer and hurt. God, why didn’t she just tell Angella about what was happening. She could have been out here trying to find a solution so much quicker. She should have done better. And so, she stumbles. Not wanting to run and miss something, but not wanting to walk and take too long. She looks down at a rock beneath her. This looks exactly like the rock she passed earlier. She stares at it for a moment, having it process in her mind. She will never be able to help Glimmer like this.
“Goddamn it Adora, get yourself together.” She yells at the rock. That didn’t help. She forces her leg back, gaining a little momentum, and kicks the rock. It flies, slamming into a tree causing it to shake, and release some leaves. That didn’t help either. She plops onto the ground, sinking into the dirt. She sinks internally too, causing her to revert back to her regular form. “Please,” she begs into the woods, “I need to help my friends. Let me find you!” This isn’t what Adora wanted to do with her day. This isn’t what Adora wanted to be doing with her life, actually, but here she is.
Finally, the woods respond. Maybe they pity her so much, for being so useless and unable to do anything by herself. The trees and brush are thick all around her, and she notices a small glow start to come from behind some trees. She follows gratefully. She moves past the bushes and trees, and it reveals the great First One’s ruin she was looking for. “Yes,” She whispers to herself, and pumps her fist in the air a little. She walks up to it, and a small section of the floor opens to welcome her. She enters.
~
Catra watches Adora’s little fit from the trees above. Poor Adora. She loves her little monologues about her goals, her achievements. About how much she utterly cares for those around her. Ugh. Nonetheless, she really kicked that rock into that tree. Wow. Her legs really are as powerful as they look. As Adora walks into the ruin, Catra silently follows her down. The door closes behind her, just short of taking her tail with it. She learned how to stalk long ago. It was a necessity for survival with Shadow Weaver, with the Horde, even just in life, since she was always the runt. The ruin is filled with energy, it makes Catra’s skin tingle and her fur stand on end. The walls of the ruin are colorful, full of pinks, blues, and yellows. The ground she pads along is cold, maybe it's made of stone, or metal, or something.
After what feels like forever walking through this stupid corridor, Adora finally stops as she reaches the end of a grand-looking room. It’s large, and has a lot of stones jutting out of the ground. Catra hides behind one of the columns in a corner that holds up the large room. She peers around it, watching Adora closely.
“Hello? Anyone here?” Adora calls out. Fuck. Catra’s been heard, hasn’t she? “Where are you, hologram lady?” Adora continues. Thank god. Catra lets out the breath she didn’t realize she was holding. Yeah, earlier she wanted a fight, but now? It feels kind of nice, just seeing Adora again, even from a distance.
A hologram of a woman manifests in the center of the room. “Hello, what is your query?” She asks kindly.
“I need help,” Adora starts. Not again. Not another goddamn monologue that is just an homage to how amazing and caring and generous Adora is. “My best friend Glimmer needs help, she's sick, or cursed, I don’t know.” Best friend? Did she really just say that? How long has it even been since Adora left her? And she's already going around making besties. Catra holds back a snarl. “I heard that I can help people, maybe I can heal them. Is that true?”
“What is your query?” The hologram repeats.
“Ugh. Stupid hologram. I. NEED. HELP.” Adora tries, aggressively pointing at herself, the hologram, then back at herself as if that would help get the message across. Catra chuckles to herself. Finally, Adora is getting ignored. She needs to taste what that’s like every once in a while, since she was always the golden child.
“What is your query?” The woman repeats, as if nothing has happened. Adora groans in frustration.
“Fine then.” Adora raises her sword. “For the honor of Grayskull!” She yells. So dramatic. A petty flash of perfect golden light fills the center of the room Adora was previously standing in. It slowly fades, revealing She-Ra once more. Catra digs her claws into the column she's hiding behind. Of course she had to bring She-Ra out.
“Hello, She-Ra. What is your query?” The hologram says diplomatically.
“I need to help my friend. How do I heal people?” Adora doesn’t even waste time trying to explain her situation anymore.
“You are not ready yet. You must let go before you can achieve your full capability.” The hologram is talking about Catra, isn’t she? Catra is always the one holding others back. Always the nuisance.
“Let go of what? I don’t understand.” Adora’s eyebrows knit together. Why would Adora need to ‘let go’ of Catra anyway? Hasn’t she already done enough to hurt her, to leave her? Catra knows Adora feels nothing for her.
Catra starts to inch forward, enveloped by the conversation Adora and the hologram are having. She has so many questions. She softly steps across the cold floor, hiding behind any column she can before she starts forward again. She can smell She-Ra from here. She’s the only alive thing around here with a scent, after all. She smells so forgien. She smells shiny and new, perfect and pristine, not like Adora. Adora smelled of sweat, she smelled of soot and dirt, and somewhere beneath that she smelled of pine. She smelled original. Now, she smells like an imposter.
Before managing a reply, the hologram shifts from its calm blue, to a dark red. “There is an unauthorized lifeform detected. Performing security protocol one to neutralize the threat.” Shit. Catra must’ve been detected by something, somewhere. She looks around frantically.
“A what is what to neutralize what?” Adora questions. The hologram disappears and the room around them turns completely red. “Oh god, not again, not again. Who’s here?” She calls. Catra doesn’t know what to do. She’s still safe behind a column. She-Ra is looking around, sword drawn and in a fighting stance. Catra stares. She hears something behind her. She looks, and she realizes shouldn’t have turned around.
Behind her is an open door, and all she can see inside of it is darkness and red eyes, staring down at her. Before she can properly get a hold of herself and run, three giant mechanical spiders leap out of the entrance, charging at Catra. She yelps and turns, trying to gain traction on the floors but she fails miserably. Guess this place wasn’t built for feet with pads. She stumbles, slipping and falling to the ground. Now, she is in the open, she isn’t protected from She-Ra’s view anymore.
“Catra?!” Adora yells at her. Great. She’s gonna get impaled by spiders and yelled at for doing so. Catra quickly flips over from her spot on the floor, baring her teeth and claws as a spider leaps upon her. She-Ra sprints toward Catra, sword raised in the air. Catra slashes the spider’s face, hissing as she does so. The spider recoils in ‘pain’. She doesn’t need She-Ra’s help. As her ex-friend approaches, the spider looks over with a few of its eyes, as it tries to recover from its injury. It leaps off of Catra, and lands against a column nearby. And now, She-Ra’s big and stupid and clumsy body with all of its generated momentum is forced upon where the spider once was, where now Catra lay bare. Catra screams, as the sword stabs into the ground just between her outstretched legs. Catra skurries backward, away from She-Ra.
“What the fuck Adora?! Watch yourself. Jesus christ, you almost murdered me.” She yells.
“What are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be here Catra.” Adora spits back. Catra is preparing herself for some sort of witty remark, but She-Ra forces herself over to her and grabs Catra’s wrist. She hisses. “Stop it. I need to get you out of here.” Adora tells her as she pulls her off of the floor and runs with her hand wrapped around her wrist. When was the last time Catra has touched Adora in a non-violent way? She barely even remembers. But Catra doesn’t resist. She wants to live, after all, even if she has to trust She-Ra to keep her from being stabbed by a spider; assuming She-Ra doesn’t manage to stab her first.
Doors out of this central room are closing all around them. “Fuck,” Catra says to herself as they approach another door and it shuts them out. The spiders are sprawling towards them from behind, gaining ground quickly. Adora lets her wrist go. Catra’s skin misses the sensation, but she would never admit that to anyone. She-Ra gets up close to the door, squats down, and forces it up with her sheer strength. She yells out as the door rumbles, scraping as it is slaved upwards. Her outfit gives off a beautiful display of her ass, her arms and their musculature, her thick, strong legs -
“Catra,” She-Ra strains as she turns her head a bit over her shoulder. Her biceps are flexing at the weight that they're carrying, since she’s holding the door up halfway. “Get under here.” Catra silently complies, and hurries under. She-Ra struggles, but she hoists the door up high enough so that she can tumble under it before it crashes to the ground. They can hear the spiders scratching at the now closed door. They made it.
They’re both out of breath from the physical strain along with the emotional one. And because of the strain, Adora shrinks down to her usual self. But, they seem safe enough for now. Adora speaks first.
“I’ll ask again, Catra,” She says spitefully. “Why are you here?”
“Why are YOU here? It doesn’t matter. Where’s the way to get out of here?” Catra crosses her arms and turns away from Adora. Catra doesn’t like having to look up at her.
“Ugh,” Adora sighs. “It’s not that simple. Those things are gonna keep coming after you because this place thinks you’re a threat, and they’re going to block any exit we’re gonna be able to find. I need to just try to find the hologram lady, and have her recognize me as an administrator. Then we’ll be fine. Lets-” Adora just keeps talking and talking; rambling even.
Catra just starts to walk away into the dimly lit hallway. “Whatever, let's go.”
~
Adora follows Catra’s lead. Why is she letting her lead again? She’s never even been here before, right? Why is Catra even here? She probably got stalked by her, again. Ugh, she’s always been so bad at remembering to check behind her for anyone, and listen for unnatural noises, anyone pursuing. And, of course, that was Catra’s specialty.
“How did you find this place?” Adora questions. She figures that silence won’t get them anywhere.
“I followed your clumsy ass. It wasn’t that hard. You look like a giant glowing beam just begging to be observed.” Catra retorts.
“But, why did you want to follow me, Catra?” She pushes. She always pushes. That’s what she's good at, going on the offensive, getting past guards and barriers. But, if she knows anyone with good strong walls, it's Catra.
“Because I was bored out of my mind, obviously. Nothing better to do.” Catra’s voice softens a little.
“So, about the last time we saw each other -” Adora recalls the last time they interacted. Catra stomping down the hallway of the Horde base, Adora’s sword screeching as she scraped it against the wall. Catra gave it back to her. She let her go. Adora knows that if Catra wanted to, she would have fought Adora then and there, and won, since she would have just been trying to protect Glimmer. As the two ‘communicate’ they do make considerable progress down the hallway, and reach a larger room with a few more hallways stemming off.
“We are not talking about that. Nothing is about that. Ugh,” Catra groans. “I never should’ve let you escape. I knew you were gonna be all weird and feely about it.” Catra stops walking, and turns on her feet to face Adora.
Adora was following much closer than Catra must’ve suspected, because now they are face-to-face, very close. Adora opens her mouth to speak, feeling completely frozen as she feels the warmth of Catra’s body radiate off of her.
“Wait” Catra says softly. Her ears twitch backwards, towards the room. She doesn’t back away from Adora.
“Wh-” Adora is about to question the woman in front of her, but she is met with a hand over her mouth: Catra’s hand. Adora’s cheeks immediately begin to burn bright red. Luckily, Catra has turned her head to look into the hallway. Still, her body is stood close to Adora’s. Nothing is touching except a hand to her mouth, but Adora feels so close to her. She missed this.
“I hear someone.” Catra breaks the silence. Her hand twitches on Adora’s lips. Catra looks back at Adora, raising an accusatory eyebrow and wearing a smug grin. “Too close for you, princess?” She says, inching closer to Adora’s face. Adora can feel her face heat up to a point she didn’t think was possible. The flush spreading over her ears and down her neck. Catra moves her hand away, and Adora’s lips immediately wish they were touching something else. Their noses are almost touching. Adora shivers. If only Catra was just a little closer, they’d be -
“Thought so.” Catra finishes before spinning her body away and lashing her tail behind her.
Adora exhales a breath. She forces her shoulders to relax and she tries to make her face stop heating up. God . She doesn’t even remember the last time she was so close to Catra, besides when they’re trying to kill each other. Adora notices Catra’s lashing tail. Adora has always tried to know Catra’s tells, they’ve been friends forever, afterall. Or, they were. Her tail acting like this usually means she’s nervous. But, that can’t be. She has no reason to be nervous. It must be frustration. Yeah, that makes more sense. She’s frustrated with Adora.
“Are you coming or not?” Catra beckons. Adora realizes that she hasn’t moved since Catra let go of her. Stupid Adora. She trots up to where Catra is walking.
“Where are you going?” She questions.
“I told you, I heard someone.” Catra snickers. “Sorry, I forgot. I was probably too distracting for you to hear me, huh princess?”
There goes all Adora’s hope for staying a regular color. She blushes. “Just tell me who you hear,” She replies, unemotionally. Adora is confused. Why is her body reacting this way to Catra? She figures it's better to ignore it, pretend she doesn’t feel it, than to try and overcomplicate things.
Catra ignores her, and continues to walk. They go down another hallway that eventually opens up into another larger room. Except, this one is pitch black. “I heard it in here.” Catra says, softly, as she walks into the dark room. It looks like just an expanse of nothingness. The darkness takes up everything.
“There’s nothing here Catra. Ugh, are you trying to play some sort of game? Another trick?” Adora says, her voice strained. She’s so confused, so frustrated. Why is she acting like this? Why did she blush so hard earlier? Adora walks deeper into the dark room.
“No, Adora,” Catra yells back. “I’ve never even been here before, for fucks sake, I’m not always trying to hurt people!” Just as Catra finishes, the only door into the room shuts behind them. They both turn back in shock of the loud noise. The room is so dark, now, without any light it just feels like they are standing in a void. It’s so devoid of light, Catra can barely see herself, even with being naturally nocturnal.
“Catra? Where did you go?” Adora says to the nothingness. She has no hope of seeing her ex-friend in this empty space. She decides it's a good idea to start wandering around, with her arms outstretched in front of her.
“Adora? Stop moving you moron otherwise I won’t be able to find you.” Catra tells her, but she sounds so far away.
~
Catra is looking so hard. It's like, when there is nothing to see, her night vision doesn’t really work. Adora sounded far away, and to the left, so she started to walk that way. Before she gets anywhere, she hears that voice again. It sounds like the voice of a little girl. She sounds sad. Catra abandons her search for Adora to follow the voice.
The world around her starts to gain color again, and then right before her eyes, the dark void she was once in has glitched and turned into the Fright Zone. “Ugh,” She clutches the bridge of her nose with her fingertips. “What the fuck is this.” She looks around her. It looks exactly the same as the real Fright Zone. Lined with guards at some corners, the same stale and dead air surrounding her, the same scent of oil and copper filling her senses.
“Catra?” She hears someone call in the distance.
“Adora? Where did you go-” Catra begins, only to be interrupted by a little Adora running past her through the Fright Zone’s hallways. It looks like Adora when she was around nine, probably. She watches.
~
“Catraaaa?” Young Adora calls as she runs down the hallways, glancing around every corner she can find. “Where are you? Don’t be scared, I know it was an accident” Adora begs. Her arm has a few scratches on it, not so deep to be brutal, but deep enough to draw some blood. It looks like it’s from Catra’s claws.
“Go away, Adora. I know you don’t want to talk to me.” Catra pleads from behind a few shipping containers. She’s curled herself up, hugging her knees into her chest. It feels comforting, almost like a hug.
“Catra!” Adora happily yelps as she spots Catra’s little ear stick up behind the containers. She runs up to her, and grabs her wrist. “Let’s go, if Shadow Weaver finds us…” She hesitates to continue.
Catra yanks her arm out of Adora’s grasp. “Don’t touch me! Stop it! I hurt you! Go away.” Her eyes prick with tears as she speaks. She looks up at Adora, then at her arm, and tries to pull back any more tears that her body wants to release. “Let Shadow Weaver find me.”
Adora squats down next to her best friend. “It's okay, I know you didn’t mean to. I shouldn’t have touched your hair without asking.” Adora wiggles closer to her friend, causing them to touch knees.
Catra doesn’t like it when people touch her hair. It reminds her of Shadow Weaver. How she always loves touching it, moving it behind her ears, grabbing her by it to get her to stay quiet, or to lift her off of the ground. “Just leave.” She adds.
“No. I’m staying. Even if Shadow Weaver finds us.” Adora protests. She likes her friend, she wouldn’t leave her side for anything, even if she got punished for it. But, Catra knows that Adora would never get punished for it, even if she was willing to take it. No matter what Catra or Adora does, it's always Catra’s fault. Adora sits onto her butt, letting her legs fall straight and leaning against the container behind her. “Do you wanna go back to the bunks? It’s more comfy.”
Catra huffs. Adora isn’t going to leave her alone. “Fine. But I’m gonna get there first!” She jumps to her feet, running past the containers and down the hall.
“No fair! You got a head start!” Adora yells as she tries to catch up with her best friend.
~
As the memory fades, the two little girls turn back into their older selves. Catra stops in her tracks after realizing, and then she turns around to find Adora, regular Adora, running after her with her eyes closed, giggling. Catra can’t look away. Adora looks so happy right now. It reminds her of when they were together, back in the Fright Zone, them against the world. Catra is frozen to her spot, and she would stay there forever if she got to watch Adora be so joyful. But, since Adora will always be Adora, she continues to run and goes straight into Catra. Catra squeaks as she is tumbled over by her ex-friend. They both fall to the floor. Adora is laying atop of Catra, quickly trying to regain composure as she lifts her upper body up onto her hands.
“Catra?” She asks, looking down upon her. The weight of Adora’s hips and legs push into Catra’s. The warmth and weight feels so comforting and personal. Thank god Catra has thick fur around her cheeks, otherwise Adora would be able to see how hardly she is blushing. A bit of red probably makes it out, but Adora is too dumb to realize what it is.
Catra scrambles out of Adora’s weight. “What the hell is this place? What just happened?”
Adora looks up at Catra, and readjusts herself to sit criss-cross on the floor. “It looks like this ruin is tapping into our shared memories, I guess.” She hesitates, looking away from Catra. Is she trying to hide something? “I don’t know why, though.” Wow, Catra didn’t realize Adora was this dumb. She can’t even put together the hologram telling her to ‘let go’ and now the entire building showing her what to let go of; who to let go of. “We have to figure out a way to get out of here.”
“Ugh, obviously Adora. This magic shit just hurts my brain. I can’t imagine having to deal with it all the time like you do.” Catra explains. She is just so done with this. Following Adora in here was a horrible idea. Catra gets up. “Stop wasting time moping about yourself.” And she starts walking away, down another seemingly endless hallway.
Adora shuffles up to her feet. “I’m not wasting time. I’m here for an actual reason. I need to help Glimmer and heal her. I wouldn’t even be here if someone didn’t kidnap and curse her!”
Catra stops. What the fuck did she just say? She’s acting like Catra is the bad guy, again? “You want me to say how fucking sorry I am or something? Is that what you’ve been asking for? You want ME to apologize after everything? I’m never going to give you that.” She turns around to face her ex-friend, but she finds herself in Shadow Weaver’s room. It's so realistic, with The Black Garnet pulsating in the center of the room.
~
“Catra, we shouldn’t be in here.” Adora says nervously. This area is off limits to them.
“The door was open, I wanna look, it’ll be okay.” Catra assures. It’s true, the door was left wide open. Kids love to explore anyway, it's not their fault. They wander up to the stone in the center of the room. Catra pokes it with one finger and it causes her fur to fluff and stand on end. Adora giggles at her.
“It makes you look all funny,” she says in between giggles. Catra shoves Adora because of her comment, but not too hard.
“You look funny.” She retorts. Catra decides that is the best insult she has ever created, and laughs at her cleverness. Adora decides it's her turn, and pokes the stone. It makes her eyes glow brightly. Her eyes were already so very blue, but this just makes it more noticeable.
“Awww,” Adora protests. “Nothin’ happens to me.” She whines. Catra stares at her best friend. Adora’s finger is still resting on The Black Garnet, her eyes only growing in brightness. Adora must not be able to feel it.
“That’s because you already look funny, so it doesn’t change you.” Catra sticks her tongue out. Adora takes her finger off the stone, her eyes slowly burn back down to their regular blue.
“Hmmph.” Adora crosses her arms. Catra points and giggles at her.
They hear steps approaching the door. The two friends quickly grab hands and run into a corner together, the darkest one, huddled closely. If Shadow Weaver finds them here, it will be bad. They hold each other close, knowing the other’s body, loving their warmth and comfort. They know how to help each other, they’ve been surviving together for all the time they can remember.
Shadow Weaver huffs and stumbles into the room, clearly in pain. She groans as she hobbles over to The Black Garnet. Catra begins pulling Adora closer to her, gripping her hard. Adora winces quietly at the pressure and pinpricks of her friend’s claws. Shadow Weaver places both of her hands on the stone, and yells out as the stone burns bright red, filling up the room with light, filling Shadow Weaver with magic. She holds it. For seconds, for minutes, or for hours, Catra nor Adora knows as they tremble in the corner together. As the woman finishes her ritual, releasing her hands from the stone, the room is still brightly illuminated, exposing the two kids in the corner.
“Look what we have here.” She stares at the two, huddled together. Adora and Catra look at eachother. They aren’t that far from the door. They both get up and sprint towards the opening, it feels like the only thing they can do. “Catra,” Shadow Weaver’s voice booms and bounces loudly against the walls of the room. With a flick of her wrist, she has suspended Catra in space, in her stance. “What have you done this time?”
“I’m sorry, we were playing, I didn’t mean to.” Catra begs, tears filling her eyes as Shadow Weaver forces her to turn around and tilt her neck up, to stare her in the eyes.
“This is expected of someone like you, but dragging Adora in here with you? Despicable.” She starts. Adora can’t handle watching this.
“Please, stop!” Adora yells as she runs over. “It was my idea, I swear, please don’t-”
“Shhh, child,” Shadow Weaver looks up towards Adora, causing Adora to stop her steps, terrified by the glare. “Don’t try to defend her. Catra knows what she has done wrong.” Shadow Weaver looks back at Catra. “Such a nuisance. I’ve kept you around just for Adora, since she is so fond of you for whatever stupid childish reason. Maybe that was a mistake. Adora will get over the loss of you eventually.” Catra holds her breath. Tears start to stream down her cheeks.
“Stop now!” Adora screams. She pushes herself in front of Catra and Shadow Weaver, trying to block her best friend from any danger. Shadow Weaver sighs.
“Why are you so fond of this thing, Adora?” She asks, lifting Catra up with her magic. She pauses. Suddenly, Catra is released. She is released in the air, a few feet off the ground, and drops. She wasn’t expecting it, and didn’t catch herself properly. Her feet and knees hurt from the impact onto the ground. She sits there, watching Adora, silently sobbing.
“I-” Adora begins to answer, looking back at Catra.
“You can’t let things happen like this, Adora. You can’t let people like her influence you. You were made for better.” Shadow Weaver gestures to Catra. Catra flinches. Shadow Weaver bends down to Adora’s level. “My perfect Adora, let this happen again and there might not be anyone to even try to influence you anymore. Understand?”
~
As the memory fades once again, Adora finds herself staring up at nothing. The room now looks like an average one within the ruin. She turns to find Catra. She’s kneeling, her palms resting on the floor in front of her. She’s shaking, a little bit.
“You always had to be the fucking hero, didn’t you?” Catra asks her, it's almost a whisper, but Adora caught it.
“Catra,” Adora approaches her. “I was only trying to protect you. I didn’t want to see you hurt.” She reaches down to place a shoulder on Catra’s shaking body. Her fingertips just touch Catra’s shoulder, when she is met with her arm slapping her away.
“Don’t even try to touch me right now.” Catra starts, slowly standing up. Adora lets out a shaky breath. “You never protected me, Adora. You never even fucking realized that you were one of the reasons I was always hurting, did you?” Catra walks closer to Adora. Adora is so scared, she backs away, trying to keep her distance. Does she mean that? Adora was only trying to be the bigger person, be dependable. “What do you think happened when you left me? Shadow Weaver didn’t have any reason not to hurt me anymore. I’m surprised she didn’t kill me right then and there. Did you even think about that, huh? I bet you didn’t.” Catra’s voice is raising in volume. Her face is twisting into anger. Adora continues to back up.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t- I was just trying to do the right thing, I promise-” Adora back hits the wall behind her.
“Don’t you fucking dare try to make a promise !” Catra continues closing the space in between them. Adora has nowhere left to go.
“You could have left with me, Catra. I offered.” Adora breathes. Her voice is spiteful. It’s true, she offered in the raid. She’s trying to calm her racing heart rate. Catra is so close, so angry, she can feel the rage and heat radiating from her.
“What do you want from me, Adora? You leave me behind without a word, and once I find you, you beg me to follow you. I’m not your fucking pet. You expect me to just come after you even when you left me in the dust without a care in the world, do you not see how much of an insult that is?!” Catra yells. Adora shoulders tighten. Catra throws her hand into the wall right next to Adora’s head. She can hear Catra’s claws dig into the metal.
Adora is breathing heavily, her eyes closed. This is all so overwhelming. Catra is angry at her, she’s so close to her, and she’s yelling, she’s rageful, she’s dangerous. If that’s all true, why is Adora’s face heating up just because her body is almost touching Catra’s? She opens her eyes, to have her vision filled up with her ex-friend. She looks, really looks, and sees the fur on her cheeks damp and pushed down, tears welling in her eyes. She is surrounded by Catra.
“Catra,” Adora says softly, her voice doesn’t show any sign of anger. Because she isn’t angry. She’s guilty, she’s sad. She never thought about it that way before. If Catra had left her like that, how would she have felt about it?
~
Catra feels everything and nothing. She feels all the rage she’s pent up after Adora left her, she feels the rage for Shadow Weaver and her mistreatment, she feels all the rage she holds for Adora’s new best friends . She also feels guilty. She feels like she could’ve done better, made Adora want to stay for her. She feels love. She feels regret. And everything is mixed up into Catra’s brain and everything is so confusing that it feels like all her emotions cancel out, and she's left a husk. She digs her claws deeper into the sharp metal of the wall, hoping the physical pain of the jagged marks she is making will soothe her internal turmoil.
Catra is staring into Adora’s eyes. She’s used up all of her words. She’s just waiting for Adora’s response, her reaction, anything she will give her. She doesn’t back away, still pinning Adora onto the wall. She tries to pick apart Adora’s face, hoping it will give her something besides a sad sounding ‘Catra’. It doesn’t. Adora looks unreadable. That doesn’t last for long though, as Adora reaches her hand up, and caresses Catra’s cheek. She watches Adora do this, awestruck by her actions. Why the fuck would she tocuh me, after I yelled and screamed at her so many times not to? Why would she touch me here?
“Catra, I didn’t-” Adora tries to say, but she’s interrupted by tears falling down her own face. She tries to sniffle them back as hard as she can, Catra can tell. Catra knows consciously that she, herself, has been crying this whole time, even if she doesn’t exactly know why.
Catra doesn’t think. Thinking hasn’t gotten her anywhere in life. Thinking has only dug her deeper and deeper into holes of her emotions.
Catra starts to lean closer, Adora’s hand on her cheek doesn’t push her back. Their bodies touch, the air in between them gone, replaced by the warmth of the other person. Catra’s legs fall next to and push against Adora’s, their hips touch, followed by their chests. Catra lets the rest of the space disappear. She turns her head slightly, lets her eyes fall shut, and kisses Adora. And, unexpectedly, Adora receives her completely, softly kissing her back and lightly gasping out of shock, Catra assumes. Her lips are soft, and she tastes like sweet vanilla, pine and salt. The kiss is soft, gentle, and questioning. As Catra pulls back, Adora follows her, extending the kiss another few moments before she is far back enough where Adora can’t reach. They stare at each other. Adora is flush, her skin pink and raw, she’s breathing hard despite the little activity. Catra, and although she doesn’t want to admit it, is largely the same.
Catra hesitates. She wants to go back in for another kiss. It looks like Adora enjoyed it. She hasn’t recoiled in disgust, like how Catra might’ve expected. And she hasn’t punched her in anger, or yelled at her in spite. All good signs. Their bodies are still touching, just lightly now. Catra brings up her free arm, and places her hand around Adora’s waist. Adora lightly whimpers at the sudden touch. It’s not much, but Adora hasn’t seen much action, has she? How long have they been staring at each other? It’s almost like they’re suspended in time. It feels like nothing around them really matters anymore, only this.
~
Oh god. Catra kissed her. Why did she do that? What’s happening to her? Adora’s body is completely rejecting any sense or composure her brain is trying to offer. Adora hopes she did well, with the kiss. She hopes it was good enough for Catra to want to come back for more. As she feels Catra’s hand brace against Adora’s waist, a fire starts within her. She feels warm, starting in her chest, and quickly lowering to rest between her legs. This isn’t what is supposed to be happening. Why is she blushing so hard? Why does she want more so badly? Adora slowly brings up her hand that isn’t against Catra’s cheek, and she holds Catra’s wrist that is still framing Adora against the wall. Adora lightly moves her hand up and down Catra’s forearm, causing her ex-friend to shiver. That reaction just lights a larger fire inside of Adora.
“Do you..” Adora starts. She isn’t sure what she’s supposed to say right now. Is Catra done with her? Or does Catra want more too? Adora looks away from her. She’s so goddamn embarrassed. Adora bites her lip. Maybe it’ll help clear her thoughts.
She hears Catra chuckle softly to herself. Adora feels the hand on her waist disappear. She involuntarily whines in disappointment, and looks up, dropping her own hand from Catra’s cheek in retaliation. She watches Catra’s grin at her as she feels fingers glide against her jaw, and then rest on her chin, letting Catra move Adora’s face exactly where she wants it. “You want more, princess?” Catra asks. Her voice must be laced with some sort of drug. It completely wipes Adora’s brain clean. All of her thoughts dissolve into one singular want: Catra . She eagerly nods. Too eagerly.
Catra chuckles again. She grips Adora’s chin a little harder. Adora, again, involuntarily whimpers softly. She can’t believe this woman is affecting her like this. They aren’t even doing anything. Well, for Adora, this is everything. Such little contact, but so much desire. Catra gives her a big smug grin. Yeah, she may be overly cocky, but fuck, if that’s not the hottest thing that Adora has ever seen. She feels Catra’s body press harder against her own. Adora brings her hand farther up Catra’s arm, up her bicep and shoulder. She feels her lean muscle tense beneath her hand. Catra, once again, closes the space. The kiss is much more aggressive this time. Adora softly moans at the newfound confidence in Catra. She puts a lot more force, a lot more passion, into it. The kiss is full of emotion.
Catra tries to back up, but Adora is taking action this time. She brings her hand behind Catra’s head. Catra will pull back if she really wants to, but Adora wants to show her that she isn’t done. Catra releases a small noise. It’s almost a moan, but it's so quiet and muffled against Adora’s mouth, she can’t really tell. But fuck, if Adora wasn’t already horribly turned on, that would’ve immedietly done it. She feels Catra’s lips curl up in a smile, as they’re still connected. What’s she smiling about? Adora is so taken up by Catra’s mouth, she hasn’t even noticed what is happening with the rest of her body. She is so tightly pressed between the wall and Catra. But somehow, she still wants to be closer to her. Their legs are mixed up together. Catra has her thigh in between Adora’s legs, but it seems like she doesn’t want to put any pressure. That is confusing, to say the least, for Adora. Part of her is glad, but another, more noticeable part of her desperately wants it.
Catra releases Adora’s chin. She trails her fingertips down Adora’s jaw, down her throat, and then pulls her hand back. Where is she going? Adora doesn’t want Catra to stop touching her, that's the last thing she -
Catra grabs Adora’s hand that was previously cradling Catra’s head. Catra forces Adora’s hand against the wall behind her, at shoulder height, and interlaces their fingers together. It feels so right, so natural, and so personal. Catra’s other hand stops bracing herself against the wall, and runs down Adora’s side before resting on her waist. So much contact. Adora is drinking it up. She brings her unpinned hand around to the small of Catra’s back, hoping to bring her in just a little closer. Is it even possible for them to be closer right now? She doesn’t know. But she wants it.
Adora pulls back a little bit, and Catra gets the hint and doesn’t chase. Adora isn’t sure why she is doing this. Maybe her rational side want’s something. Needs to remember something. Needs to do something, maybe? “Catra,” Adora says breathlessly. Catra softly pants in front of her, her pupils blown out. “What’re we doing?” Adora asks. Her voice holds no strength. Catra lets Adora’s hand go, releasing her pin. Adora didn’t want that. Oh god, she’s ruining it isn’t she?
~
Catra feels so much. She is a little grateful for Adora wanting to pull back, just so she can watch Adora’s face. What she did to her. Adora is pink, her mouth sits with her lips slightly parted, like she's ready to start again. Catra can feel Adora’s chest rise and fall against her quickly. Does she want to stop? Catra doesn’t know what they’re doing as much as Adora doesn’t, but Catra at least knows how to self-prescribe confidence. Catra pets along Adora’s cheek.
“Do you want to stop?” Catra asks her. She deeply hopes the answer is no. All she wants is to stay here forever with Adora. Stay in this room, even if it is in some random ruin. Adora’s eyes widen.
“No,” Adora shakes her head aggressively. She looks so desperate to keep going. Catra’s face lights up. She doesn’t want to stop. Catra’s body is filled with warmth. She’s only been kissing Adora for a few minutes, right? But already she’s heard so many pleasing noises. All she wants is to get more of them out of her. Catra’s heart is filled with warmth, her cheeks are burning red, and she feels the heat sizzling in between her legs. Catra starts to lean back in, to continue, but -
“Catra,” Adora speaks again. Why is she talking right now, when they could be making out? “I don’t want to stop, but… we should. Stop, I mean.” Catra’s face falls. Her smile disappears, the desire in her eyes doesn’t dwindle, but it is ruined by the sadness she now shows. “I need, I mean, I have to go. People are depending on me out there.” Catra’s hands fall away from Adora, resting at Catra’s sides. “I want this, Catra, I really do, but we can’t have it. You know that. Not like this.”
Catra stares. She knows she is looking at Adora, but really, she's looking through her. Her eyes are glazed over. The beautiful, intoxicating aura of their actions has broken. She’s now just standing there, a weak little kitten again, being rejected, being not enough, being nothing. She forces her eyes to stay dry. She’s not crying anymore. She’s not showing Adora how she feels about this. After showing this much emotion, this much trust, Adora just wants to cut it all away for her stupid new friends she’s practically just met?
“I’m sorry, Catra.” Adora rushes out as she realizes Catra isn’t reacting. Catra is all in her head. Her body is simply just a vessel for her brain’s functions, at this point. Adora pulls Catra in for an innocent hug.
“That’s it?” Catra quietly asks against Adora’s shoulder.
“What?” Adora questions. Did she not hear her, or is she confused?
Catra pulls back. “That’s it? You’re done? Now you’re just gonna leave me again like always, princess?” Catra steps farther away from her. She was so stupid to ever think this could go differently. Adora was probably just stringing her along, kissing her for the experience instead of for the emotion. Catra raises her voice. “Even I expected better, and that’s saying a lot, coming from someone like me , right Adora?”
Adora takes a deep breath. “I know you’re angry at me right now, but I have really important things I need to do! I’m serious. I’m She-Ra, what the fuck is the Alliance going to do without me?!” She snaps.
“What am I going to do, Adora?!” Catra yells back.
Adora’s eyes widen. Fuck. That was a mistake. Catra has said far too much. She’s been here for too long, she’s felt too much. How long is it even going to take her to recover from this? Is she going to have to sit, curled up at the foot of a cold and empty bed for days, again? Catra needs to have the last word. She needs to end this. What has Adora done for her, anyway?
Catra snickers. “I guess we will find out, won’t we? I’ll miss you, Adora. Don’t be scared when I become something you no longer recognize.” Catra looks up, and with sheathed claws, pokes Adora square in the forehead. She paints a gruesome smile on her face, one that shocks Adora. Good. Catra turns around, and walks out of the room.
Just as she is out of sight, Catra pounces down onto all fours, claws scratching into the ground, and runs.