Chapter Text
Kel combs through his freshly cut hair, trying to tame it’s messiness. It’s a big day after all, he doesn’t want to look bad for the big recital! They’ll be leaving in an hour, and Kel can’t wait.
Sunny and Mari are going to be so cool! Kel saw how hard they’ve been working on their song, so he knows without a doubt it’ll sound amazing.
Kel smiles in the mirror, flexing his arm. These fancy clothes make him look really cool. Kel looks at the last thing he has to put on before he’s completely ready. His nemesis…shoes with laces.
“Hero!!!” Kel called out, before remembering that he went to Sunny and Mari’s house ahead of time to give Mari some flowers and encouragement. Gross. Oh well, Kel will just have to do this himself, like a real man.
What was it again? Make the tree, the bunny goes around it? Through some sort of burrow? Why do they make this so complicated?! Fancy shoes should just have Velcro like all the other cool shoes.
Kel sighs, maybe he should just wear his orange sneakers. It’d be good enough, right? This train of though was interrupted by a loud sound.
Is that…sirens? Why is it flashing red and blue? What’s going on? Kel kicks off his untied shoes, and runs downstairs.
Hero’s at the door. He looks…tired. His parents are both there, giving Hero a hug.
“Hero…what’s going on? Why are there police cars?” Hero gave Kel a dead stare, devoid of emotion. There are dried tears on his face. His parents give Kel a pitying look.
Kel’s dad crouches down in front of Kel, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I have some bad news, bud. Your friend Sunny he’s… he’s gone.”
“Wh-what do you mean?” Kel blinks. He can feel his eyes getting wet. “He has a recital today… he’s coming back, right? He just… got hurt. Right? That’s why there were police…they came to take him to the hospital and-”
His dad cut off Kel’s rambling. “He’s dead, Kel. I’m so sorry, son.”
Kel stared at his dad, trying to process the information. “How?” Kel’s voice, usually so loud and confident, came out in a mere whisper.
His mom spoke up this time, while drying her tears. “I’m so sorry baby. I’m so sorry. The poor boy… he took his own life. Hero and Mari found him. It’ll be ok,” she scooped Kel up in a hug. Usually Kel complains, saying he’s too old to be picked up. But right now, he doesn’t seem to care.
“We’re here for you, alright?”
While this was happening, Hero quietly walked up the stairs. He was tired.
°°°
Kel met Sunny when they were both nine. Sunny was Kel’s first real friend, and Kel was Sunny’s.
Despite how young they both were when they met, Kel distinctly remembers one interaction they had, just a few weeks after they became friends.
“Y’know what’d be cool, Sunny?”
Sunny looked at Kel and tilted his head in a questioning manner.
“If we went to space together. We could both be astronauts, and go to Mars! Maybe we could go to the Sun, since that’s what you’re named after!” Kel giggled at his genius idea. Sunny on the Sun.
“We’d be real space pirates! Fighting off bad guys and going from planet to planet. Wouldn’t that be great?”
Sunny nodded enthusiastically, a small smile on his face.
“Ok then Sunny, let’s make a promise! When we grow up, we gotta be astronauts together!” Kel stuck out his pinky finger towards Sunny.
“Pinky swear?”
Sunny’s smile grew just a tad bit wider as he interlocked his pinky with Kel’s.
“Pinky swear.” He whispered.
°°°
Upon looking into the casket, the initial thought Kel had is that Sunny looked asleep. Sunny’s always loved sleeping.
At sleepovers, Sunny was always the first one to go to sleep, and the last one to wake up. Pretty much the only thing that could get him out of bed was Hero’s pancakes.
If Kel didn’t know any better, he would expect Sunny to open his eyes any second, and glare at Kel for interrupting his dream. Kel would laugh, pull Sunny out of bed, and go downstairs to eat breakfast with him.
He would try and steal some of Sunny’s bacon, and Hero would lightly slap his hand and say that it’s bad manners to take other people’s food. Mari would giggle, and sneak Kel an extra piece or two.
But… that was back then. Now, Kel knows better. He knows that Sunny will never open his eyes again, and he notices the distinct lack of rise and fall of breathing.
Kel knows Basil and Sunny considered themselves best friends, but despite that, Sunny was still Kel’s best friend too. Kel is about 92% sure you can have more than one best friend.
But that doesn’t really matter anymore, since Sunny was gone. Dead. He killed himself. Why would he do that? Was Kel a bad friend? Kel always ranted to Sunny about his problems, so selfishly.
Why was he talking to Sunny about his problems like that? He should’ve noticed that something was wrong. He should’ve noticed that Sunny was hurting. Why did he have to leave?
°°°
It’s been a week since the funeral. Kel’s parents offered Kel more time off of school, but as much as he hates class, Kel needs the distraction.
He’s been spending all day mindlessly watching tv. He would play video games but they remind Kel too much of him… he was always so much better at games.
Sometimes Kel would try to talk to Hero, maybe get him to tell Kel a story like he used to do. But Hero has been taking all this badly.
Shortly after the funeral, Kel’s family was walking home. Right behind the Suzuki’s family. Hero saw Mari, slowly walking behind her parents.
—
“Mari… you know I’m here for you, right?”
“…”
“Mari? Please talk to me”
“…”
“Mari?! Why won’t you talk to me?! Why are you IGNORING me?!?! Please Mari… I need you”
Hero grabbed Mari’s wrist.
“Let go of me, Hero. I don’t want to talk to you. I need to go home.”
Kel looked from Mari to Hero. This was getting awkward. Shouldn’t they just go home?
Kel’s mom spoke up, “Hero, sweetie, we should get going. You can talk to Mari some other time.”
Hero ignored her. “Please Mari, I love you. Why won’t you just talk to me?!? Am I not as important to you as you are to me?!?!”
Mari looked angry now. “NO. I’m going home. We’re over, Henry. Leave me alone. Goodbye.”
——
Ugh. Kel scrunched up his nose, thinking about that unpleasant experience. Because of that combined with Sunny, Hero’s been all mopey and annoyed. Kel loves his big brother, but not when he’s acting like that.
“KEL!!! HURRY UP, I DON’T WANT TO BE LATE”
Dad’s shouting snapped Kel out of his train of thought. Shoot! First day back, and already going to be late. Typical scatterbrained Kel.
Kel goes downstairs and out the door, getting into his Dad’s pickup truck. Hero’s not here, so Kel gets to sit in the front. Nice.
The ride is relatively quiet, with only the soft sound of the radio filling the air. Usually, Kel’s chattering the entire ride to school, but he just can’t seem to find the energy today.
“So…” Dad tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, trying to find a way to break the uncomfortable silence. “You excited to get back to school, kiddo?”
Kel shrugs. He wanted to be out of the house, but he didn’t really want to go to school, either. It’s just the lesser of two evils.
“You’ll be able to see your friends again, that’s good.”
Kel…didn’t really want to see them. Aubrey would be fine to see he guesses, but she’s always a little annoying. She’s been clingy with everyone since the funeral, knocking on Kel’s door to see if he wanted to play. Presumably, she’s been doing the same with Basil and Mari.
Basil has been really weird. Mom said he’s still in denial. Basil said that there was absolutely no way Sunny killed himself, saying,“he wouldn’t just leave me like that!” He sounds like a crazy conspiracy theorist, saying someone murdered him and framed it as a suicide. Real life isn’t like crime dramas.
But Kel doesn’t want to say that to his dad and stress him out more than he already is. His parents have been having to deal with two sad kids, the least he could do is put on a happy face for now.
“Yeah!” Kel smiles to the best of his ability. “This is the longest time I haven’t seen Basil and Aubrey in forever!”
Dad smiled, evidently glad that Kel was excited about something. “Well I’m happy for you. I know it’s difficult, dealing with a loss like this,” nope nope nope, Kel does not want to listen to the sappy grief talk again, no thank you. Luckily, they just pulled into the front of the school.
“Sorry Dad, don’t wanna be late! See you after school! Byeeee!!!!” Kel gets out as quickly as he could and slammed the door. Crisis averted. Kel doesn’t know if he could stand another 20 minute talk about his emotions.
°°°
Walking into his home room class, everyone was staring at him. This is awkward. Kel widely smiles, waving, and sits down at his desk. Aubrey and Basil aren’t here, as expected.
Oh no, Mikheal is walking over here. He really doesn’t feel like dealing with him. Kel sighs, “what do you want, Mikheal?”
“Ugh, why did you say it like that? I’m not always mean. I just… I just wanted to say you have my condolences. For your friend. You’ve been in my family’s prayers. If you want some free bread or something you can stop by the bakery.”
Kel blinked at Mikheal, surprised. He’s never nice to Kel. Recently, he’s been going out of his way to blow raspberries at him whenever they see eachother.
“Really?”
“Yes, really. Whatever. It’s not a big deal, my parents basically forced me to tell you whenever I see you again.”
Mikheal walked back to his desk, leaving Kel by himself. That’s really surprising. Mikheal was nice to Kel, and even offered him free food. A once in a lifetime opportunity.
A couple minutes after that interaction, the teacher started class. Kel is having a really hard time paying attention. He already missed a week, how is he supposed to know what was going on?
Besides that, he just can’t stop looking at Sunny’s desk. It’s empty. All wrong.
Sunny’s supposed to be sitting there, looking out the window. Sunny always spaced out during class, and Kel always gets distracted. Because of that, neither of them knew what happened in the lesson so Aubrey and Basil would fill them in.
Kel always hated those study sessions, wanting nothing more than to go outside a play a game. But now, he would give anything to go back to then. Even just ten minutes to talk to Sunny, to tell him that he can’t leave everyone like that. It’s just so unfair.
Sunny had a good life, Kel thought. Not perfect, but good. He had friends. He had family. Why would he kill himself like that? Why would he do something so selfish? It’s not fair. It’s not fair! Sunny deserved to live!
Why was everyone looking at Kel? Shouldn’t they be listening to the teacher? “Oh” Kel realizes, thinking to himself. “I’m crying.” This is embarrasing.
Kel tries to calm himself down, but can’t stop the tears from falling down his face. Miss Smith walked over to his desk, crouching down.
“Hey, Kel, do you want to step outside the classroom with me?” She said it with a comforting smile on his face, but Kel still feels humiliated. He can’t even get through the first class period without breaking down. How weak is he?
Kel gives a shaky nod, wiping away his tears and walked outside of the classroom. This was a terrible first day back.
°°°
When Kel got home, he immediately ran upstairs and onto his bed, screaming into the pillow. The ride home was so awkward. He ended up getting checked out, the school counselor saying he wasn’t “emotionally healed enough to be attending school again.”
So stupid. Who cares if he’s emotionally healed?! Whatever that means. He’s going to die if he has a stay in this stupid house any longer! With stupid Hero, and stupid Mom and Dad, and stupid greif talks, and the stupid stump he can see in Sunny’s backyard.
Kel can hear knocking on the door. It’s probably Aubrey again. She will just not leave Kel alone. Oh well. Kel was just thinking that he wanted to get out of the house, so he might as well hear her out. Kel forces himself out of bed and walks downstairs.
Kel opens the door, revealing an annoyed looking Aubrey.
“KEL! Finally! I’ve been knocking forever!!! It’s rude to keep a lady waiting, y’know.” Aubrey slapped Kel on the arm, and then promptly pulled him into a hug.
“DON’T IGNORE ME LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN! I can’t lose all my friends at once, please, Kel…”
“Sorry, Aubs,” Kel made sure to use the nickname Aubrey hates a ton. “It’s just been…difficult.”
Aubrey broke the hug, wiping away a couple tears on her face. “It’s ok, as long as you don’t pull a stunt like that again. Otherwise, I’ll bash your face in, got it?”
Kel glared at Aubrey and stuck out his tounge. “I’d like to see you try!”
“Ugh, whatever. Now c’mon, we’re meeting Basil at Gino’s. He’s paying.”
Aubrey quickly starts walking towards the direction of Ginos, not even looking to make sure Kel was following. Now who’s the rude one?
Getting closer to Gino’s, Kel sees Basil sitting right outside, waiting for them. “HEYYYY!!! BASILLLL!!! ITS USSSSS!!!!!” Aubrey yells, trying to get Basil’s attention.
Aubrey and Kel jog over to where Basil is. Aubrey smiles at her two friends, “C’mon, let’s go in, I’m starving!”
°°°
Kel takes a bit of his greasy pizza, delicious. Now only if he had an ice cold orange joe to wash it down.
The group has been pretty quiet. In an odd change of roles, Aubreys been the one trying to fill in the quiet instead of Kel. Kel just doesn’t really have anything to say, for once.
“Hey, guys I just…really wanted to thank you. It’s been really difficult, I’m just really glad I still have friends that can be there with me.”
Kel smiles at Aubrey, “Awww, of course Aubregine! We’re your friends, no matter what!”
Kel glances at Basil, waiting for him to say something. Basil’s just been staring at his food, not eating or anything. Weird.
“I’m sorry Aubrey. I can’t do this right now. Thanks for inviting me.” Basil gets up and puts some money on the table, practically running away.
Aubrey looked angry. She got up to chase after him. “That little-“
“Aubrey, wait.” Kel grabs her arm. “He’s not ready. Let’s just leave him be for now, ok? We can talk to him again tomorrow.” Kel gives Aubrey what he hopes is a comforting smile.
Aubrey sighed. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you’re right, Kel. He needs time. We can still hang out in the meantime though, if you want.”
“Yeah, I’d like that!”
It wasn’t the same, and it probably never will be. But it’s a good step in the right direction.