Work Text:
Click Play. Start reading as soon as the song starts.
The first time Adam plays it, it’s an admission to himself. He has loved the song for years, every new version he hears giving him the same warm feeling inside, reminding him of all the people he’s loved in his life, even if it hasn’t worked out in the end. Recently, though, a new face and new feelings accompany the song; the feelings he’s known were there for months, even years, are the only things to cross his mind as he lightly strums the chords in the privacy of his home, the LA sun sinking behind the mountains, casting the room in darkness the longer he plays.
It is the first verbal or lyrical manifestation to cross his lips, and it sends chills down his spine.
The second time Adam plays it, he’s on the road with the band, a life of private jets, long rehearsals, and goofing around. They’re not kids anymore, they all like to have time off to themselves, to decompress and not get stressed over the whole tour which is bringing them from one end of the world to the other and back. Adam sits in his hotel room most nights, sitting up by the window, watching the foreign city bustle with life, while he sings to himself, to the person he wishes was there now.
James and Jesse hear him playing it all the time and start wondering if their best friend has finally figured out what they’ve only guessed at. Adam doesn’t mean for it to become a thing for all of them, it had almost been an unconscious thing to play the song now, to sift through his thoughts and try to make sense of them. That hasn’t been working, so he might as well make the thing sound good. He really does have the best friends.
In Japan, they throw a little party in the hotel for the tour crew and their friends. It’s a night of laughter and songs, nothing like the massive, drunken parties they threw in their twenties. Adam is happy, truly happy for the first time in weeks and it doesn’t bother him when James starts to play the song; in fact, Adam joins in and as everyone starts to sing along, he realizes that he’s still missing one particular voice in the crowd. He also gets an idea.
Backstage at another show; they’ve been rehearsing all day, plagued by difficulties and setbacks the crew have managed to work around. They’ve also added a song to the set list; Adam wonders if people will understand, if they’ll speculate about what it means, but ultimately he realizes that he just doesn’t care. It’s a great song, and he wants everyone to hear his version now that it means so much to him.
It’s amazing; when they start the audience doesn’t quite know how to react – this isn’t their song. They all still know it though, and by the end, everyone is singing along, loving the slow, steady break in the middle of the band’s usual chaos. They do the song on every additional tour stop, and it never fails to choke Adam up. When he reads the show reviews, most of them mention their risk and applaud it, and he can't help but wonder what someone else might think.
Suddenly he can't wait to get home.
But I can’t help
Falling in love
with you
As he strums the last few chords, Adam’s hands can’t stop shaking. His voice is steady but every other part of him is a bundle of nerves; any second he could cut and run, but the song keeps him rooted there. As he finishes, the room is silent until heavy hands clap for him, the sound echoing in his ears, unsure of what to say next.
“So,” Blake finally says.
“So.” Adam answers.
There really isn’t much else to say after that.