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The first time the two had kissed, Kaoru hadn’t gotten the chance to properly take everything in. It had been short lived, a stolen kiss taken backstage before either Koga or Adonis could walk off and see the two of them but just far enough out of range that the fans suspected nothing.
They had been flirting for a while, Kaoru finally getting over himself just enough to admit to Rei in a 3am text conversation that he actually had feelings for him and he wasn’t being played for a fool.
Oh how he’d changed after leaving Yumenosaki.
Neither of them mentioned it afterwards, so Kaoru had come to try and convince himself that it was a dream. He couldn’t imagine having been rejected so quickly. The flirtatious conversations didn’t seem to fizzle out, though, so he allowed the tiny bit of hope to continue to bloom in his chest.
Rei had initiated the kiss, surprising Kaoru with how quickly everything had happened.
He’d been walking offstage, prepared to collapse onto a chair and give himself a moment to cool off from the exertion of a live show when he felt himself tugged back. An oddly strong arm wrapping itself around his waist and turning him. Before he could open his mouth to protest the sudden movement, he felt a pair of lips pressed against his own.
Rei ran cold, he always had, and that was evident in even the brief kiss. Not that he was a block of ice, but he was certainly cooler than he should have been after finishing a show.
The blonde was almost stunned as the kiss ended, greeted by a pair of red eyes that winked at him before he saw Rei walking off.
The next thing he knew, Koga had walked off stage, bumping him harshly with a shoulder and telling him to “Move, dipshit.”
That had been enough to shock him into coming back to the real world, shaking his head to clear his thoughts and hurrying back to their dressing room.
He’d been shocked enough that he hadn’t even thought to text Rei about it, letting the tension of the stolen kiss hang in the air between them. All he could think of was how that short second or two felt, and he found his mind drifting to it at inopportune times.
Of course, Rei Sakuma was as difficult as ever, and nothing else happened for nearly two weeks. Two agonizing weeks, where Kaoru felt a tension that didn’t exist for anyone else, and Rei seemed as relaxed as he ever was.
UNDEAD worked as it normally did, they set up their practices and discussed upcoming lives, and Kaoru began to think he was being played for a fool at this point.
Men were difficult, and Kaoru wondered why he’d ever chosen to admit to himself that he was bisexual. It seemed to be far more trouble than it was worth.
Rei was usually far more trouble than it was worth.
Those two weeks passed at an almost painfully slow speed, and with every passing day Kaoru tried to will himself to say something , but his own self doubt got the better of him and he chose to just brush it off. Surely it was nothing, he had to tell himself.
---
At the end of those two weeks, really it was more like sixteen days but Kaoru definitely wasn’t counting, he felt like he was going to scream. Every little conversation between them felt like a cliffhanger, and he really felt as if he were going to explode. The flirtatious comments and teasing all went nowhere, despite seeming hopeful and he swore that he would say something to Rei if two weeks passed and nothing had happened yet.
He even told Izumi his plans, swearing on his life that he had to say something. All the model did was taunt him, and Kaoru complained even more to him that his life was just so unfair .
Still, fourteen days passed and he did nothing. Luckily, the model seemed to have forgotten.
Even more luckily, he didn’t have to wait quite as long as he’d expected.
It was the night (at this point it might as well be considered the morning) of another performance, and their show had been exhilarating. It always seemed to be, and the endorphins were running high as Kaoru stepped off that stage. He had almost completely pushed down that hope that anything could happen between him and Rei, forcing himself to forget that brief moment between them.
And, for once, Kaoru seemed to be right.
The four gathered in the dressing room, laughing and joking as the clock ticked ever later into the night. They’d gotten offstage close to two in the morning, and Kaoru would be surprised if he made it back to Ensemble Square before four in the morning. They all slowly managed to get changed, and now that he was back in more comfortable clothes, he could properly relax.
He still needed a shower, and to wash his face, and do his skin care, but that could wait a few minutes.
As all of them began to filter out, a buzz in his pocket seemed to alert him to a message. A quick glance at his phone revealed that it was three in the morning, and a text message from ‘Senacchi’ made itself known.
It was probably some image, and Kaoru determined that Izumi could wait thirty minutes. After all, it was barely 8pm where he was in Italy, and the blonde knew that his friend’s poor sleep schedule would keep him up far later.
He looked up from his phone, jolting a bit in surprise as his eyes met that familiar red pair again. His phone tumbled from his hands despite his best effort to catch it, and he realized just how close Rei was.
“Jesus fuck -- do you like freaking me out?” He scrambled back a step or two, clutching a hand just over where his heart would be, grey eyes wide with fear.
The vampire didn’t seem terribly phased, just chuckling quietly. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, Kaoru realized that Adonis and Koga had left at some point, leaving him alone with Rei.
“I’m so terribly sorry, Kaoru, my dear.” Rei took a step towards him, and Kaorus’ throat felt dry. He swallowed, almost nervously, as he tried to pull himself together. He should be better at this, right? He’d flirted with tons of girls.
So why did Rei make him feel so different?
“Yeah, sorry, my ass.” Despite the annoyance in his tone, he made no move to step any further back, even though Rei had moved closer to him.
Was he closer than before? He had to be, right?
Rei seemed to lean down slightly (it was what, a centimeter? He didn’t know how Rei managed to make everything seem more dramatic than it was) and their eyes met again. Kaoru’s breath hitched in his throat, and he swallowed down the anxiety that began to bubble up once more.
Neither of them moved for a moment, and Kaoru felt two fingers hover just below his chin before they pressed up slightly. Rei’s thumb moved up, brushing over his bottom lip for a split second. He seemed to lean in closer, and Kaoru was taken aback by how warm his breath seemed to be, despite every other part of him being so cold.
Red eyes darted down, tracing his lips almost as if it were a question, and Kaoru barely managed a singular short nod before his lips were captured by Rei’s.
He had time to react this time, melting into the kiss and almost pressing closer into Rei. His hands were all but useless until he brought them up, curling into the fabric of Rei’s shirt at his front, as if to steady himself. That still-weirdly-strong-for-a-weak-vampire arm wrapped itself around his waist again, and Kaoru swore that he was dreaming.
The second time they kissed, it was still over far too soon, but Kaoru had more of a chance to process everything. All he knew was that he was tempted to try and lean back up to kiss him again, but the space between them grew quickly once more and Rei didn’t say anything else as he pulled away from Kaoru. He gave him that same wink, a smug smile on his face as he turned on his heel and walked out of the dressing room.
Once more, he was stunned in place for a moment, mouth opening and finding no words.
“God dammit. ” He had gotten a kiss, sure, but the blonde still had no answer. At least now he knew that this was worth the trouble.
He grumbled as he grabbed his phone, throwing himself back onto a chair as he opened the text from Izumi.
Senacchi
Tch, it’s been sixteen days Kaokun. How’s the vampire boyfriend treating you? 3:04am
Or did you chicken out? 3:04am
Murder was a viable option, Kaoru thought.
---
You
hes not my boyfriend weve kissed like Twice. 3:07am
Senacchi
Oh?? Twice?? Are you hiding things from your senpai, Kaokun? 3:07am
You
youre a day older than me ill go to italy and kick your ass. 3:08am
yes. twice. twice and i still have no fucking answer 3:08am
Senacchi
You’d have an answer if you told him, you know. 3:08am
You
and what if he doesn’t feel the same? 3:09am
Senacchi
You’re a fucking idiot if you think That of all things. 3:09am
You
youre avoiding the question 3:09am
Senacchi
And you’re avoiding the obvious. 3:09am
Just like you avoid your feelings, Kao. 3:10am
Read at 3:11am
---
You
ill tell him today, promise. if i dont, you have every right to fly to japan and kick my ass 8:42am
Senacchi
Already booked the ticket <3 8:45am
You
go to bed, asshole. its like 2 in the morning 8:45am
Read at 8:46am
---
The day passed rather quickly despite the topics weighing heavily on Kaoru’s mind, and as the end of the day began to fast approach he realized that he had no other option. He had to tell Rei at this point, or else he’d never say anything. Or, he’d be taunted by Izumi Sena again.
Well, the first was definitely the most important. But he didn’t want Izumi to be right, either.
So he tried to pull himself together.
The evening came quickly enough, and Kaoru found himself on the beach. A safe place for him. Somewhere he could let his guard down, even just for a brief moment.
He knew he was meant to go to practice for UNDEAD, but they’d just had a live and he’d gotten a text earlier from Koga saying that he had to run some errands.
So practice had been called off.
Still, he knew Rei would likely show up to the practice rooms anyway. Or Adonis. If not, Rei would be in his dorm at Ensemble Square, bickering with Eichi about some silly thing that really didn’t matter.
The sand beneath him was comforting, even if he knew he’d be brushing it off for hours after this. The calming sounds of the waves seemed to envelop him, offering something that would have felt like a hug any other time.
Today, however, the ocean seemed to listen. He almost wanted to laugh, at the idea that he would be talking to the water as if it were some parental figure. Although, he guessed anything was better than his dad.
And to his dad, anything was better than Kaoru.
Pushing down those thoughts that bubbled back up, courtesy of a life spent around his father. Stupid insecurities that seemed to work their way into his thoughts, absent minded comments that had weasled their way into his every day lifestyle. He hated it. Hated thinking that his dad had any influence on who he was now.
Wasn’t that what he tried to avoid with all this? His dad hated idol work, and so he actively had to work against him there. Hell, the man thought he’d take over the live house. As if. His dad hated the idea that his son was gay, and so Kaoru had to work past layers of internalized fears before he could even think about admitting that he was bi.
And now here he was, sulking on the beach like a moody teenager because that’s what he was .
A moody teenager with a stupid crush on a vampire.
A vampire that he’d kissed twice now.
“ God. ” He nearly shouted the word, fingers curling into his hair as he hunched over himself just a bit. He didn’t pull, but the tension from his fingers was enough to ground him in reality. He stared down at his lap, tracing the wrinkles in his jeans.
“I’m an idiot, aren’t I? And don’t tell Senacchi I said that, because he’ll laugh at me.” He grumbled, forcing his eyes shut. He tried to push all those thoughts out of his mind, but it all seemed to loop back to Rei Sakuma.
He almost wanted to ask how long these feelings had existed, given that he’d only come to terms with them recently. Rei had always been touchy and flirtatious with him, and this was no exception.
If he could just tell him then he’d have an answer.
God, he was so much better with girls.
“I hate men. Shouldn’t have even thought about not dating girls.” He groaned, just under his breath. He took in a deep breath, trying to let the sound of the waves calm him when he was struck with motivation.
Motivation he’d been lacking for weeks at this point.
His movements were far too quick, almost clumsy as he rushed to do what he needed to do, not wanting this burst of confidence to leave him.
Kaoru loosened his grip on his hair, eyes still wrenched shut as he fumbled for his phone. He opened his eyes, shaking his head to clear his mind as he opened his text messages.
---
You
i know we dont have practice but where are you 8:16pm
Rei
An old man needs his rest, Kaoru~ 8:18pm
Although, if you must know, I’m in my dorm. Did you need me? 8:18pm
You
I’ll be there in 15. 8:18pm
Rei
Did something happen? 8:19pm
Kaoru? 8:19pm
Delivered
---
Really, Kaoru didn’t know why he’d been so impulsive. He’d been taken by a quick rush of motivation, but now that he was here he didn’t quite know what he was supposed to do.
The dorm building at Ensemble Square was big enough, and had worse come to worst then he could have just walked away and texted Rei that it was nothing important.
But he’d already come too far at this point.
He knew exactly where his dorm was, having had to come here multiple times to drag the vampire to an early morning meeting or some practice that he was keen to avoid in the middle of the day.
Still, it felt odd to be here at this time. It was nearly nine, and Rei was usually far better at being up and active at night. So he had no issues with meetings or obligations at this time.
Not that Kaoru was here for any such obligations, he was here to get an answer. And he told himself he wouldn’t leave without one.
Kaoru raised a hand to knock on the door, taking a deep breath. It was just Rei . Why was that such a terrifying thought to him?
He felt his phone buzz in his pocket again, jolting him from his train of thought.
9pm in Japan, 2pm in Italy. He didn’t doubt that Izumi would be harassing him to go through with his promise.
He shook his head, pushing the thought aside. Finally, he knocked on the door. His left hand remained by his side, fingers crossed as they pressed into his thigh.
Please be Rei, please don’t be Tenshouin. Kaoru could even deal with his other roommate, that first year --Aira, but he didn’t think he could stand to see Eichi right now.
It seemed that Lady Luck was finally on Kaoru’s side, however, as the door swung open to reveal Rei.
Contrary to his texts, he didn’t seem to be resting. He was still dressed in his casual clothes, but he had his hair tied back at his neck. He’d pushed his pair of glasses up to the top of his head, and Kaoru had to assume that he’d been doing paperwork.
The blonde realized soon enough that he’d been staring, and he shook his head to try and clear his thoughts.
“Is something wrong, Kaoru-kun?” The vampire’s voice cut through his thoughts, and Kaoru opened his mouth to speak.
He found that he still didn’t know what to say, going silent for a moment.
He cleared his throat, letting the hand that had knocked drop to his shoulder, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. Kaoru glanced around, as if looking down the hallway before peeking into Rei’s room. Empty, luckily.
“Uh, yeah. Something’s on the mind. Can this conversation happen like. Not in the hallway?” He asked, quirking a brow at Rei.
Confusion seemed to spread across his face, and slowly he nodded, motioning for Kaoru to step in. Another cursory glance down the hallway revealed nothing, and so he stepped in after Rei, letting the door quietly click shut behind him.
Maybe he should have thought a little more before he did anything. That seemed to be a rather constant theme within Kaoru’s life.
Kaoru’s eyes lazily drifted around the room, in some poor attempt to distract himself from the conversation. It was nice, and he could spot the papers that Rei had been looking through on his bed. Absently, he wondered what they were. But he wasn’t too keen on asking. He’d get a far too complicated answer.
When his gaze finally landed on Rei again, he was met with that all too familiar piercing gaze. He was sure it wasn’t on purpose, but he always seemed to be staring so pointedly.
Rei tilted his head, a silent invitation for Kaoru to ask his question.
Another buzz from his phone in his pocket. Kaoru ignored it.
“What. Is going on with you?” The question came out a little rushed, but he supposed it’d have to do. He was so much more composed when he was flirting with girls, maybe even a little cocky, but this was so incredibly different.
“ Two times you’ve kissed me. Said nothing, and left me to just sit there.” He couldn’t help the frustration that crept into his voice, underlying his words. He raised a hand to point sharply at Rei. “This was after I told you how you felt. Am I being messed around with? Is this some stupid game?” God, he realized how desperately whiny he sounded about the whole thing, but he couldn’t take it back now.
The blonde let out a short breath, now that all of that was out of his system. “Well?”
Rei seemed to be thinking over the question, red eyes drifting over Kaoru’s form. He almost felt as if he were being inspected. As quickly as they’d started drifting, they had snapped back up to his face.
“And here I was, thinking that was what you wanted..” The vampire trailed off, and Kaoru could only process confusion at the statement.
“Your whole playboy persona centers around that, no? A different girl on your arm every week. I could only assume you didn’t want anything to tie you down. Hm..”
“That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. And I had to hear myself be straight for three years.” Kaoru let out a huffed breath. Maybe Izumi was rubbing off on him, he was so whiny today. He shook his head, barely managing to hold back a roll of his eyes.
“Was I incorrect then?”
“No shit. I already told you how I felt.”
“And yet you waited… three weeks?”
“..I hate men.” Kaoru grumbled under his breath.
Rei seemed to pause again, “And is the implication that you’d be.. Alright with something more committal?”
It was another split second before Kaoru reacted. He didn’t have it in him to respond. It was a few short steps to him, grabbing the front of his shirt and tugging him down that one stupid centimeter into a kiss.
The third time they kissed, Kaoru felt like he was on fire.
He had been expecting it this time, even if Rei hadn’t, and he soon felt the vampire relax into it. His hands relaxed slightly into his shirt, still keeping a somewhat loose grip on the fabric as he pulled himself closer. One arm moved up, loosely draping around his shoulder and tugging out that hair tie to let Rei’s hair fall loose around his shoulders.
He felt Rei’s arms move as well, one hand making its way to his hip as the other wrapped around his torso, pressing against his back as if trying to pull him as close as possible. His hands were cold, even through the fabric of his shirt and jeans, but Kaoru was more than happy to oblige, deepening the kiss with a simple tilt of his head.
He tensed the slightest bit, feeling Rei’s fangs nip his bottom lip, although he didn’t complain. It was another few seconds before Kaoru finally pulled back, eyes still closed, and keeping himself close to the vampire. He let out a laugh, more like a slight puff out of breath, quiet in the stilling air of the room.
“Yes. That’s what I meant.” He finally bothered to answer his question, giving a slight shake of his head. He didn’t quite feel like moving, and Rei made no move to break the contact.
Kaoru sighed softly, “I think we’re both idiots..” And Rei could only chuckle in agreement as he finally stepped back, widening the space between them.
And if Rei’s work was tossed aside in favor of catching up on those kisses that Kaoru hadn’t expected, no one had to know. Nor did anyone have to know about the soft contact, or the quiet conversation in the dark room about the future of UNDEAD.
Well, until Eichi walked in on the two, curled up into the dark sheets of Rei’s bed, fast asleep and completely having forgotten to change out of their day clothes.
No one else had to know, though. Well, other than Izumi Sena.
---
Yesterday
Senacchi
Am I booking this ticket Kaokun? 8:58pm
Tch, ignored by my own friend. Shame. 9:01pm
Today
You
i wasn’t ignoring you i was Busy 9:00am
Senacchi
Well, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed. 9:03am
You
more like the wrong bed 9:03am
Senacchi
What. 9:03am
Kaoru. What. 9:04am
You
:) 9:05am
[image attachment = reisakuma_asleep.png] 9:06am
Senacchi
Oh thank god it's just him. I was worried for your sanity. And your reputation. 9:06am
You
oh fuck off 9:07am
Read 9:07am
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