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“You did it wrong again ,” Jisung complained, and Jeongin was really starting to feel like a predebut Hyunjin being told to rap better.
“I’m sorry,” Jeongin breathed out. He felt like he’d collapse any second now, but was too scared to tell the others. His boyfriends didn’t know about his asthma, and he planned to keep it that way. When he signed under JYP he’d never told anyone about his condition, as he knew no one would let him perform if they knew of his asthma attacks that threatened him every time he got on stage. Normally he’d be able to manage himself by using his medication, but with how hard he was working lately to prepare for a really important comeback, he found himself short of breath and wheezing, yet still trying to keep it a secret from the others.
“Let’s try again,” Minho said, and he turned to face the group—or, more specifically, to face Jeongin. He did his absolute best to follow the choreo in the way Minho had taught them, but his breathing was slowing and he couldn’t keep up with the complicated moves.
“Come on, Jeongin!” Hyunjin whined. You should dance better.
“Jeongin, stop slacking off,” Chan said, and though Jeongin knew it was supposed to be motivating in a way, he didn’t take it that way. He felt his knees give out and suddenly he was on the floor, and was he drowning? He couldn’t breathe, his lungs suddenly closing, and he felt like he was going to die. Would his last words really not be what he had planned in the 5th grade?
He faintly heard noises all around him, but he couldn’t make out what they were. Voices. Maybe his life was flashing before his eyes. Or maybe he was already dead, and this was heaven, and it was the angels that were talking to him.
But then he could focus, he could see the light blue inhaler being held in front of his eyes, and after taking a breath with it, he could breathe again.
“Don’t you die on me,” someone was saying.
Jeongin’s eyes finally focused on the scene around him. He wasn’t dead, which was a relief. He was on the floor of the practice room with his back against the mirror, and his members were staring down at him. They all looked terrified, staring wide-eyed at Jeongin with their mouths dropped open.
“Jeongin,” a soft voice said, and Jeongin focused on Chan. His boyfriend was staring down at him with a soft expression, and Jeongin suddenly felt terrible for keeping such an important thing from his boyfriends.
Jeongin didn’t normally do hugs, but he almost just died, and he knew there were worse things to do than to hug his members. So he fell forward into his leader’s strong arms, feeling them wrap around him and pull him close.
“I’m so sorry,” Jeongin said, and he felt tears erupt from his eyes.
“It’s okay,” Minho’s voice said, and he opened his eyes to see that Minho was sitting in front of him, patting his hair. Felix’s hands cupped his cheeks and helped to wipe his tears away.
Jeongin felt someone’s body behind him, and he turned slightly to see that Hyunjin had thrown himself on top of Jeongin and Chan. For the first time Jeongin noticed that Hyunjin was crying, and he suddenly felt a million times worse.
“Hyunjin, stop crying,” Jeongin said, scooting off of Chan to properly hug his friend. Hyunjin sobbed into his shoulder, holding him tight enough to break his ribs.
“I thought you were gonna die,” Hyunjin whined out.
Jeongin’s heart clenched. “Hey, baby, calm down. I’m alive, see?”
Hyunjin nodded, and Jeongin found himself pressing kisses to his boyfriend’s hair, doing his best to calm him down. Hyunjin finally pulled away only to lean in again and press a chaste kiss to his lips.
Jeongin took turns hugging every member, giving extra hug time to Hyunjin, Jisung, and Felix, who all panicked and cried. He even let the three of them kiss his cheeks, which he immediately regretted because Changbin came over to attack him with kisses, too, followed by Minho and Seungmin, and suddenly they were all chasing Jeongin around with puckered lips and sparkling eyes.
After playing for a bit, Jeongin let himself fall to the floor, laying his head on Changbin’s lap (Changbin’s thighs were squishy like a pillow). Seungmin crawled over to lie next to them, and Jeongin didn’t even complain at the head pats he was getting from the two boyfriends.
“So,” Chan said, and Jeongin knew he was about to get a pep talk. “What was all that about?”
Jeongin sighed; he’d forgotten that he would have to tell them the whole story.
“An asthma attack,” he murmured.
“Well duh,” Minho sighed, coming to sit criss-cross near the group. Jisung immediately crawled over to latch onto his boyfriend like a koala. Minho helped Jisung get comfortable in his lap before he continued, “I called your mom and she talked me through what to do in that situation. But why’d you never tell us you have asthma?”
Jeongin winced. “I didn’t want you to think I was weak or to give me special treatment. Besides, I take my medicine and it usually helps.”
“This is the type of thing we need to know about,” Chan sighed out. “What if Minho wasn’t smart enough to call your mom? What if we all panicked and didn’t know what to do? Jeongin, we’re your family, and I understand if you keep secrets from us, but it wasn’t smart of you to hide something so important.”
Changbin’s voice was close to his ear. “You could have died,” he said, his voice cracking at the end.
And Jeongin knew he could have died. He’d known the second he’d signed his life away to JYP that if he was going to keep this a secret, he could die.
So Jeongin nodded, and he sat up. Next to him, Seungmin leaned against him, and Hyunjin crawled over to lay across their laps. He discovered that Felix had been lying against Changbin as well.
“I’m sorry,” Jeongin said, and everyone else went silent. “I did something wrong, but I’ve learned, and now I won’t keep secrets from you guys.”
Hyunjin spoke up. “I won’t keep secrets either! Did you know that Seungmin lets me kiss without your guys’ permission!”
“We don’t need permission?” Seungmin said, confused, “You’re literally my boyfriend too?”
Felix giggled from his spot next to Changbin. “Last night I pretended to be asleep but I was actually binge-watching Tokyo Ghoul for the millionth time.”
“I accidentally drank all of Minho’s milk but blamed it on Jisung!”
“Hey!”
“Those hair clips in the toilet were mine, I dropped them in but didn’t wanna take them out.”
“There was a time I used Jisung’s toothbrush.”
Everyone went silent at that last one.
“Dude, seriously?” Jeongin raised an eyebrow.
Minho smirked evilly. “I’m pretty sure the toothbrush was unused. I haven’t seen Han brush his teeth since predebut.”
Everyone burst out laughing at that, except for Jisung, who pouted and ditched Minho to go and cuddle Felix instead. Hyunjin joined them too, and the thought crossed Jeongin’s mind that those three should be CuddleRacha.
Felix waved Jeongin over, and though Jeongin would normally deny cuddles, he found himself crawling into CuddleRacha’s arms, earning giggles and cooing from each of the members.
Jeongin closed his eyes, prepared to fall asleep in his friends’ arms. Today was a long day, and he was sure the rest of the members were prepared to fall asleep as well. They’d probably all be sore from falling asleep on the studio’s hard floors, but that was tomorrow's problem. For now they would just relax, putting their responsibilities on hold in favor of a good time.
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