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Blaine was doing this. He needed to let Kurt go.
They had talked about it. The moment Blaine had found out he was moving to Florida he had called Kurt and in the end they decided that they would try and make their relationship work long distance.
But Blaine knew that their relationship would end up in pieces. Kurt was too good for him. He was handsome and popular and had guys hitting on him everywhere he went. He was a cheerleader for god’s sake and Blaine was just McKinley’s resident nerd. And Blaine knew that Kurt loved him and only him and that he would never cheat on him but Blaine didn’t want to and couldn’t compete. He couldn’t help but feel like Kurt had settled for him. Not that he needed to settle because he could have anyone he wanted but he knew that Kurt deserved better.
So he was doing this. He was breaking up with Kurt because he loved him and he didn’t want to hold him back. Kurt was too good for him, had so much potential and didn’t need to deal with a long distance relationship with someone that wasn’t good enough for him.
He went to glee club and sat down next to Kurt who was talking in a group with Finn, Sam and Puck. He was glad that this was his last day at McKinley or else Kurt’s brother and best friends would probably beat the crap out of him for the stunt he was about to pull, even though he was doing this because he didn’t want to hurt Kurt.
Blaine knew that everyone was planning on having a fun last day with him before probably never seeing him again but it was now or never so he would have to ruin their plans.
Once Mr. Schue came in and settled everyone down, Blaine raised his hand and waited for his teacher to call him up to the front of the room. Blaine slowly stood up and walked up to stand in front of his beautiful boyfriend and his best friends, feeling a sense of regret and pain coursing through his body. But there was no chickening out, no backing down. He needed to do this.
“Um, as you guys already know, today’s my last day at McKinley.” Blaine started to say as he took in everyone’s sympathetic faces. He was going to miss them so much. “And I just want to let you know that you guys are always going to have a special place in my heart and you’ll always be my family.” He assured them.
“We love you Blaine,” Rcahel called out and afterwards everyone cheered and clapped for him. He looked to Kurt and saw him clapping along with everyone else, looking so care-free, like everything was going to be okay between the two of them when in reality it wasn’t.
“I love you guys too. And I don’t mean to make anyone upset, I’m doing this because I don’t want anyone to be upset and because I think it’s what’s best. So if it’s okay I’d like to say a few words about my beautiful boyfriend, Kurt before singing him a song and leaving here with my head held high.” He said, looking over to Mr. Schue for his approval.
“Of course, Blaine.” His teacher assured him. “Take as much time as you need to express yourself.”
“Okay then.” He said, taking a deep breath before looking back over and staring right into Kurt’s eyes. He could already feel the tears welling up in his own eyes and began speaking before he decided against doing this.
“Kurt, I love you. You were my first love and you’ll always have a special place in my heart.” He said and saw that some of his fellow glee club members changed their expressions from delighted and excited to skeptical and nervous. But Blaine continued talking and was relieved to see that Kurt still had his cute, innocent smile on his face. “Which is why it’s so hard for me to leave.”
“But we're doing long distance, remember Blaine?” Kurt asked him and Blaine let the tears fall down his face. ‘No Kurt we aren’t.’ He thought sadly to himself.
“Kurt just listen to me okay.” Blaine told him and Kurt nodded his head, still smiling while everyone else was looking at each other, knowing exactly what was about to happen. Some people like Rachel and Tina had tears in their eyes and Sam was holding Kurt’s hand while Finn was rubbing his back. But Kurt still seemed to believe that nothing was going on.
“I want to sing you something and I’ll think it’ll explain everything but before I do, I want you to know that it has nothing to do with you. It’s me. I’ve been living in a fantasy world where people like you and me exist and live happily together but I need to come to reality.” He paused to let those words sink in for Kurt but it didn’t seem to work and Kurt was only making it harder for him to do this.
“Kurt, you're so beautiful, and funny, and smart and you deserve so much. You have a bright future for yourself and I’m not going to stand in your way from achieving greatness. So just listen to the words in this song and remember…” His voice cracked as the tears continued to pour down his face. “... that I will always love you no matter where I am or what becomes of us.”
He then went over and pulled Kurt out of his chair before hugging him tightly on his waist and then releasing him to give him a kiss. He let go of Kurt and let him sit back down where Finn resumed rubbing circles into his back while he went over and sat at the piano.
‘Now or never.’ He told himself. ‘Just breathe, it’s for the best.’
He played the opening notes of the song and began singing.
Close The Book Before It Turns To Tragedy
Tear The Treehouse Down, Give Up The Fantasy
Like he had stated before he was just living a fantasy. The past two years of his life with Kurt were magical and perfect but who was he kidding? He was the nerd that wore glasses and bow ties while Kurt was one of the most popular kids in school. It wasn’t going to last, as much as they both thought it was going to. Kurt would move on and start dating a football player or some other sort of star and would live a glamorous life as a Broadway star while Blaine had a much more simpler lifestyle planned out for him. He wanted to end it now though before they both grew to resent each other because the last thing he wanted to do was watch as he slowly started to loathe Kurt and Kurt slowly started to loathe him. Because along with hating Kurt, he would hate himself because he knew that he would be holding him for the greatness destined for him.
Nothing To Regret
Since The Day We Met
Glad We Took A Chance
Making Our Own World
Perfectly Imperfect Like Tt Had To Be
He continued singing and held eye contact with Kurt as he continued singing and could see that Kurt was slowly starting to realize what was happening, even if it was taking him longer than Blaine wanted it to. He had no regret about his time spent with Kurt except the fact that he couldn’t be more for him. Since the day they met, they had been best friends but Blaine had watched as Kurt grew into himself and became more confident and attractive, causing him to attract more friends. And even though Blaine was still his number one and they went on to date each other, Blaine still never grew into himself the way Kurt had. He stayed awkward and shy and took any abuse thrown at him while Kurt didn’t take shit from anyone.They had tried but it wasn’t meant to be. There was a quote that kept coming into Blaine’s mind, “Letting go of someone you love is painful. But time come you’ll realize that it’s the best thing you’ve done for yourself.” This is what he kept telling himself. It was perfectly imperfect.
Who Thought That One First Kiss
Would Turn Into Two Heartbreaks?
Cause Since We Were Young
I Swore
I’d Never Walk Away
He remembered their first kiss. It was both their first and when it happened, Blaine swore sparks went off, it was that good. And he thought, at that moment, that they were going to be forever. That they would hold on until they end and that they would never break each other's hearts. But here they were. He had promised Kurt when he gave him that promise ring that through thick and thin, he would never walk away but here he was breaking his promise because it was worth it. This was too much for him to handle and even if it made him seem like a coward or a douche, he didn’t care because he cared more about Kurt than he did about himself.
I Love You So Much
That I’ve Got To Let You Go
It Couldn’t Last Forever
And I Hope You Find Better
He watched as Kurt gasped when he sang “I’ve Got To Let You Go” and then as his eyes filled with tears. Sam grabbed his hand again but Kurt quickly snatched it away and stood up. Blaine was hoping that Kurt moved on with Sam since he had known Sam for a while and knew he was good for Kurt. Sam was Kurt’s typical boyfriend and Blaine had always known that in the back of his head. He was just hoping to hold on and have Kurt belong to him for sometime before giving him up. He knew that Sam wouldn’t hurt Kurt or disappoint him. Sam was Kurt’s “better”. They wouldn’t have lasted forever even though they had planned their whole life out, from starting a family to spending their last days with each other.
I Can’t Forget Us
Can’t Pretend We Ain’t Broken
It Was Good Together
Now I’ve Gotta Let You Go
Kurt slowly walked over to the piano bench and sat down next to Blaine. They never tore away from one another’s eyes and it hurt Blaine so much the way his ex-boyfriend’s blue eyes shined with tears. He would never forget Kurt. He would always be his first love and would probably always be his one, true love. Maybe they weren’t broken at the moment but Blaine didn’t want to get like that. He would rather have three whole years of good memories that they shared instead of spending the rest of their life together just to end up tearing each other apart.
I’m Picking Up Pieces Left And Right
Now That Our Hearts Are Both Untied
It’ll Take Time
It was going to take them both time to heal. They had been friends ever since they were five years old and had met in kindergarten. They weren’t just losing their lover, they were losing each other’s friend. Blaine was releasing Kurt, untying him from his heart so that Kurt could fly. He knew that he was only holding him down, pressing on his wings.
It’ll Take Time
No One Can Say We Didn’t Try
I’ll Think Of These Days All My Life
It’ll Take Time
Kurt scooted closer to Blaine and put his hands on top of Blaine’s so that they were playing the piano together. This was going to be their last song together. Blaine was never going to forget his time with Kurt. From meeting each other at recess and Kurt standing up for Blaine against a bully to them realizing they were in love with each other and everything in between. He had cherished every moment he had ever had with Kurt, remembered every single one day because he knew that this day would eventually come. It was inevitable. Blaine had tried, they both had. They had had their problems but they eventually worked it out. But this problem was never going to be able to be fixed. They were both who they were and they were both too different. It was going to take time… but it was worth it because Kurt would be happier eventually, when he found someone else. And Blaine was hoping to find someone else too.
It’ll Take Time
I Love You So Much
That I’ve Got To Let You Go
It Couldn’t Last Forever
And I Hope You Find Better
Yeah
Blaine and Kurt savored the moment, forgetting about everyone else and only focusing one each other and the music. They both had tears streaming down their face and Kurt was full on sobbing at this point. He lifted his hands off Blaine’s to wipe at his eyes but it wasn’t really much use since more tears kept falling down.
I Can’t Forget Us
Can’t Pretend We Ain’t Broken
It Was Good Together
Now I’ve Gotta Let You Go
Blaine and Kurt played the last notes before Blaine turned to face Kurt. He hugged Kurt as tight as he could and held on to him, taking in the moment.
“I don’t understand,” Kurt said before wiggling out of Blaien’s embrace. Blaine could tell that he wasn’t angry, he was hurt but Blaine knew he did the right thing.
“Just let me explain Kurt…” Blaine started to say but Kurt cut him off.
“No… no you said that we would make it work. That… that we would stay together and do long distance.” Kurt told him, his voice breaking. “What did I do wrong?”
“Kurt, no,” Blaine told him. “You did nothing wrong. It’s me.”
“Don’t you dare give me that “it’s not you it’s me crap” Blaine Anderson,” Kurt said, raising his voice. “I don’t understand,” He continued, softening his voice. “I thought we loved each other.”
“Kurt, I do love you, that’s exactly why I’m doing this. I don’t want to hold you back.”
“What are you talking about? Why can’t you just tell me the real reason? Why are you lying to me?” Kurt said, the tears starting to spill down his porcelain skin again.
“I’m not lying to you, Kurt.” Blaine assured him. “Like I said I don’t want to hold you back. You deserve someone better than me Kurt. Someone who can provide for you and is on the same level as you.”
“You sound crazy Blaine, you know I love you and only you.” Kurt said. Blaine should’ve known Kurt would put up a fight, he was always the fighter in their relationship, unafraid to fight for what he wanted until he got it.
“I know Kurt but I don’t want to have to compete with you. With me being away in Florida and us just being so… different from each other, I’m afraid it’s not going to work.”
“I’ll go with you. I don’t care what anyone says, I’ll move to Florida with you.” Kurt begged. “Please don’t do this to me Blaine, I love you.”
“I love you too Kurt but you have to stay here with your family and friends. I’m not going to have you give up your life for me.”
“But you are my life Blaine. We’ve known each other forever and we’re just going to throw our whole relationship away just because you're scared? You don’t think I’m scared because trust me Blaine, I’m terrified that you’re going to find someone that’s more like you, smarter and that likes the things you like and that you’re going to leave me.” Kurt confronted him, making Blaine feel a twinge of guilt for not considering that maybe Kurt was insecure as well.
“Kurt, I know it’s scary and I know it may seem like you’re never going to find love like the love we have but trust me, you will. You're Kurt Hummel, beautiful, talented and popular. You’re destined for greatness.”
“So are you. We may be different but at the end of the day we share the same dream of doing something great. And I wanted to do that great thing with you beside me.”
“Kurt, I’ve made up my mind. I know this hurts, it hurts me as much as it hurts you, trust me it does. But I’m doing this because I care about us and I don’t want us to grow up and start to hate each other.”
“That would never happen.” Kurt asserted.
“You don’t know that. I’m cutting you free Kurt. So you can fly.” Blaine said, smiling at Kurt through his tears.
“But I don’t want to fly without you.” Kurt said.
“Why not?” Blaine asked him, taking his hand within his to remember the feeling of Kurt’s baby soft hands.
“Because I don’t want to fall,” Kurt admitted, looking Blaine straight in the eyes.
“Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, you are the last person anyone expects to fall. You don’t need anyone to be a star except yourself.”
“There’s really nothing I can do to make you reconsider?” Kurt asked him, the tiniest bit of hope in his voice.
“No, I’m sorry Kurt but there isn’t. We can always be friends.” Blaine suggested. “We can talk everyday on Skype and text and maybe sometimes we can come and visit each other.” Kurt smiled a little and Blaine was happy to see that Kurt was starting to accept the fate of their relationship. “But I don’t want to do long-distance and it’s not because of…”
“Because of me,” Kurt finished saying for him.
“Exactly, it’s because I don’t want us to fall apart and then not even be able to be friends. It's better this way.”
Kurt leaned over and hugged Blaine, grasping onto him as if he was going to disappear out of thin air. “I’ll never forget you.” He whispered as fresh tears appeared in his eyes.
“Neither will I,” Blaine said, hugging him back. “You’ll always be my best friend Kurt. We’ll talk to each other everyday if you want.”
“Actually…” Kurt said. “I think I need a few days. To think about things.”
“Of course,” Blaine said, reaching up to twirl a piece of Kurt;s hair in his fingers, something only he was allowed to do. “You can be the first to call.”
They stayed like that for a few minutes, embracing each other, not saying a word. They had seemed to have forgotten that there were still other people in the room with them but no one dared to interrupt them. Everyone else just split off into their own groups, talking about the two boy’s breakup, letting Kurt and Blaine have their last moment together.
A couple minutes later, Blaine’s phone buzzed and he let go of Kurt so he could see what had been the cause of it going off. He had gotten a text message from his dad saying “Hey sport, I’m here to get you. Take as long as you need :)”. He looked up at Kurt and gave him a sad smile. He could tell that Kurt already knew what the text said as tears spilled down his face.
“Hey,” He said, taking his hand to wipe Kurt’s tears again. “No more crying.”
“I can’t help it,” Kurt said back, holding Blaine’s hand to his face, feeling his touch. “You’re leaving forever. I’m never going to see you again. We’re never... “ Kurt paused again as his voice broke. “... we’re never going to be together again.”
“Trust me Kurt, we’ll see each other again someday. And I already told you that you have to move on.”
“Well you should probably get going,” Kurt told him, ignoring Blaine’s last comment. How could Blaine tell him to move on after just breaking up with him not even an hour ago when they had been together for three years. It was all so unexpected. “Can I come with you?”
“Of course you can,” Blaine said, standing up and holding Kurt’s hand while he picked up his bag. “Come on, my dad’s waiting for me.” Blaine turned to the rest of the group who had resumed watching them. He was surprised to see that Finn, Sam and Puck didn’t look like they wanted to kill them, they actually looked appreciative. All the girls (besides Santana but even she looked upset) had tears streaming down their faces and Artie and Mike both gave him sad smiles.
“Um... I’m leaving now everyone.” He said to the group. “I’ll miss you guys so much and I’ll keep in touch with everyone, I promise.”
He was about to say more when Puck practically tackled him to the ground, hugging him tightly.
“I’m gonna miss you so much dude.” Puck said and Blaine wasn’t so used to seeing Puck with his guard down but… he liked it.
Everyone else got up and came over joining in with Puck and giving Blaine a group hug. The only person who didn’t join was Kurt who just stared, sadly at one spot while he waited by the door for Blaine.
After a sufficient amount of time, everyone released one another and let Blaine go over to Kurt. He took in the scene, the choir room, his friends, his teacher, just all of it before walking out of the door, just like he had planned to. With his head held high.
Him and Kurt walked hand in hand, down the halls of McKinley silently, savoring their last moment together. They walked out of the doors and walked to Blaine’s dad’s car. His dad gave him a nod, letting him say his final goodbye to his ex-boyfriend. Blaine turned to Kurt and took his other hand so that they were facing each other.
“I guess this is goodbye?” Kurt asked him, not meeting Blaine’s eyes.
“For now, yes.” Blaine assured him and released one of Kurt’s hands so he could lift up Kurt’s head and meet his eyes. Those beautiful, ocean blue eyes. He was going to miss those eyes the most. “But when you’re ready we can talk, alright? Take your time, there’s no rush, I’ll be waiting.”
“Okay,” Kurt choked out before his body shook and he started crying again. Blaine hugged him close to him, rubbing circles on his back, trying to reassure him.
“Hey, remember what I said? No more crying?” Blaine told him, trying his best to keep his tears at bay and be strong for his friend.
“I know, I’m sorry, it’s just… I’m going to miss you. Why are you acting like this is all going to be okay?” Kurt asked him.
“Because it will be. Trust me on this Kurt, no matter what happens we’re always going to have each other, whether we’re together or broken up.” He held Kurt out in front of him and took one last, long look at him. “Remember that, okay, for me?”
“I will,” Kurt said, wiping his eyes again. Kurt hated crying and Blaine hated seeing Kurt cry, let alone making him cry. “I promise.”
“Oh that reminds me.” Blaine said and looked down at his hand, taking off his promise ring that he had given to Kurt for Christmas. “I want you to have this. And no buts, I already made up my mind.”
To his surprise, Kurt didn’t put up a fight. He just watched as Blaine opened up his hand and placed the ring in his palm.
“As a reminder,” Blaine told him before letting Kurt go. “Now I have to go. Can’t miss my flight.”
Kurt just nodded his head in understandment as he watched Blaine get in the car. They waved at each other and didn’t stop waving until Kurt could no longer see him as his dad’s car left the school parking lot.
Then Kurt just stood there. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t feel like going back into the choir room, let alone going back in the school. Yet he didn’t want to go home either. He knew this day was coming, the day Blaine had to leave. He didn’t know that the day would end in them breaking up. His heart was broken. He remembered what Blaine had sung to him, the lyrics “It’ll take time” played over and over in his head again. Just how long would it take? How long was it supposed to take to heal from someone when you had been with them for so long? How did people do it, let go of someone they loved? Never in a million years had he expected them to break up. They were going to get married. They were going to become stars together. They were going to start a family. They were going to die together. They were supposed to be with each other forever.
Kurt came back to his senses and remembered that he was still standing outside, the cold wind brushing against his face. He turned and walked back inside the building and walked straight to his locker. He opened his locker and then his bag before taking out all the items that reminded him of his ex-boyfriend. If he was going to move on then he needed to get rid of all reminders of the two of them being together, even if it was for a little while. He didn’t want to forget forever, he just wanted to forget for now.
He took out their prom photo from when Kurt was crowned Prom Queen and placed it in his bag. Then he took out the “Courage” photo and placed it inside his bag. Then there were various other pictures and tokens that Blaine had given him. By the time he had gotten rid of every single item, his locker was half empty. He would have to find some other things to cover up the open space. Feeling somewhat satisfied he shut his locker door and closed his bag before pressing his head against his locker and closing his eyes as fresh tears came to his eyes.
They were really over. He couldn’t believe it, he didn’t want to. But he knew he had too. Blaine was on his way to Florida now. They would now be miles apart from each other. But just as Blaine had once sang to him, they would always have their special place, somewhere only they knew. The sooner he accepted the fate of the two of them, the sooner he would feel better and would start to move on to better things. He wanted to do that for Blaine since he knew that’s what he wanted for him.
Kurt thought some more, just about little things that him and Blaine had done together. When they had first met in kindergarten, them hanging out with Finn, Puck and Sam, joining glee club together, performing together, going out on dates, staying up and watching old movies together, just the good times they had shared together. He would never forget their time spent together.
He heard feet walking towards him and opened his eyes to see Finn, Puck and Sam. He quickly wiped the free tears on his face and gave them a soft, sad smile.
“Hi guys,” He said softly.
“You okay?” Sam asked him, giving him a hug. Puck joined in and they just stayed like that for a moment. It felt good, usually Kurt didn’t like letting down his guard and showing his emotions but he knew that if he ever needed to he could with his best friends.
"I'll be okay," Kurt assured them.
Meanwhile, Finn was standing close to the group, on his phone texting Blaine. Finn knew why Blaine had done what he did and he had mad respect for him. It must’ve been really hard for him to do since he knew how much they had loved each other but even good things don’t last forever. This was one of the good things.
To Blaine: You did the right thing.
Blaine saw the text message from Finn pop up at the top of his screen while him and his dad were driving to the airport and clicked on it so he could respond.
To Finn: Do me a favor and look out for him for me. I know I broke his heart but it was for the best.
To Blaine: I will. Talk to you later?
To Finn: Talk to you later.
Then Finn and Blaine each fist bumped their phones, their own signature move as Finn went over to join the group hug and Blaine started out the window, letting the tears pour down his face once again and reminiscing on his time spent with Kurt.