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They were sitting in the parked Bentley on a Soho street, and Crowley was holding a thermos of Holy Water in his hand. He couldn’t believe it. After a hundred and five years, Aziraphale had reneged and given him the water. His mind was spinning and he didn’t quite know what to say.
“Can I drop you anywhere?” he offered.
Aziraphale put his hand on the handle of the door. “No, thank you.” Crowley’s face fell, and Aziraphale reacted. “Oh, don’t look so disappointed. Perhaps one day we could, I don’t know. Have a picnic. Dine at the Ritz.”
Crowley tried again, not wanting him to leave. “I’ll give you a lift. Anywhere you want to go.”
Aziraphale looked to be debating with himself for a moment, then said with a hint of sadness, “You go too fast for me, Crowley.”
He felt as if he’d been slapped. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” he demanded.
“Just what I said. You drive like a maniac.”
“I don’t believe you.”
Aziraphale wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Well, it’s true.”
“That’s not what you’re talking about, and I know it. Be honest with me.”
“I’m quite sure I don’t know what you mean,” Aziraphale huffed. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, my errand is done, and I’ll be going now.” His hand clenched the door handle and pulled.
Crowley snapped to lock the door miraculously, and Aziraphale pulled futilely.
“Let me out, Crowley.”
“Not until you tell me the truth.”
“I told you. You drive like a bat out of hell, if you’ll pardon the phrase, and I’m afraid of being discorporated.”
“Bullshit. You’ve never ridden with me in a car, and I seem to recall you being the owner of quite a few fast stallions over the last six millennia. You prided yourself on having them be the fastest.”
Aziraphale’s mouth was set in a line. “That’s quite different.”
“It's not, but we’re getting off the point. I want to know what you meant by ‘too fast’.”
Aziraphale looked down at his hands. “I - I know what you want from me.”
“I don’t want anything from you,” he lied.
“You do. I can sense love, you know.”
Crowley didn’t let on that he was embarrassed. “And?”
“And... I know how you feel about me.”
“That’s not new, though. I’ve felt that way for hundreds of years. Surely you haven’t just noticed.”
“No, I’ve known for a long time.”
“So what are you getting at? If you’ve known for hundreds of years, I don’t see how I’ve surprised you with it now. And I’ve never asked you for anything, save the Holy Water.”
“I know that.”
“Then how the hell am I going too fast for you?!” he cried in exasperation.
“That was wrong of me to say. It’s not what I meant.”
“Then tell me what you meant!”
Even in the low light, he could see Aziraphale’s cheeks redden. “I… I mean that I feel the same way, and I have for a very long time,” he admitted, almost too quietly to hear.
Crowley froze, then his face broke into a disbelieving smile. “You do?”
“Yes. But we can never act on it. Hell would destroy you.”
“I’ll take that risk.”
“I won’t. Ever. Now let me out of the car, Crowley.”
Crowley hesitated, then snapped and unlocked the door. Aziraphale opened it, getting to his feet without looking back. Crowley leaned over and called him. “Angel?”
Aziraphale bent to look at him, and Christ, he was so beautiful. “Yes?”
“I love you.”
Aziraphale just looked sad and shut the door.