Work Text:
0.
"he's fine, sunghoon."
sunghoon sighs, his steps get heavier on the apartment lobby that’s gonna be his new home.
on the phone, heeseung is still trying to convince him that jake—his new roommate—is a good person and have a smile that basically resembles the sun.
“i hope so,” tapping the lift button, sunghoon waits while looking at the apartment interior arround him. it’s actually not bad, at least comparing with the price he has to pay. moreover the good discount for the first three months. “is this apartment haunted?”
”i—what are you talking about?!” the older clicks his tongue. ”why am i letting you live there if it’s haunted!”
“i don’t know… because it’s cheap?”
”i love cheap things too but not all the time, sunghoon. just—remember this, don’t be harsh on jake. he’s like, a huge golden retriever—"
“i’m going inside the lift. talk to you later?”
”hey! answer me first—“
“bye, heeseung.”
sunghoon laughs hearing heeseung screaming frustratedly before he abruptly ends the call.
without heeseung’s voice and surrounded by the cold lift walls, sunghoon’s worry creeps back in fast. the increasing number on the small led screen makes his stomach feels uneasy. he starts to think that maybe, maybe this is a bad idea. maybe sunghoon should have just said yes when his mom told him to just ride his dad’s old car to the campus, that way he doesn’t need to leave the house.
maybe sunghoon shouldn’t have take the risk by leaving his comfort zone. maybe—
"uh... hello?"
sunghoon blinks.
he doesn’t even realize his legs already brought him to the 15th floor hallway and a series of knocks were already sent to one of the doors.
in front of him, there’s jake. sunghoon recognize him although he only saw one picture given by heeseung. he’s goodlooking and hard to forget, that sunghoon agrees. sunghoon also just made a conclusion that jake looks as handsome in real life. with his navy pajama and hair that sticks out in random directions, he looks at sunghoon curiously.
sunghoon only then remembers he was being greeted.
"h—hi, yes...."
"you’re—sunghoon, heeseung’s friend?"
sunghoon nods. he was going to open his mouth again if jake doesn’t smile, showcasing his perfect teeth and the charming corner of his lips. the taller suddenly could hear heeseung’s words earlier: jake’s smile is so bright, like the sun. don’t get surprised.
“i’m jake!” jake’s eyes goes into a line and sunghoon doesn’t expect the arch of his lips can get any wider than it already is. “nice to know you, roommate!”
sunghoon is astonished.
it really is resembles the sun.
1.
sunghoon wakes up with his back still in pain and his t-shirt clinging to his skin. last night was cold enough for him to turn off the air conditioner but he certainly didn’t expect for his room turning into a sauna at 9am. sunghoon opens the window while hitting the bottom of his back that’s still hurting since he lifted lots of boxes the day before although jake helped him.
right.
jake.
taking a walk to the bathroom, he throws a sideglance to jake’s tightly closed room door. there’s no sound that indicates the boy has woken up, so sunghoon makes another conclusion: he’s not a morning person.
until sunghoon listens to his growling stomach, the sight of the round dining table with papers scattered makes him pause in his step. jake looks focused with headset blocking his hearing and how his forehead frowns.
there are two plates on the pantry, one only with bread crumbs left while the other one is decorated by a pair of toast. also a cup of something that sunghoon doesn’t know what since he could only catch the steam. sunghoon recognize it as coffee only when he took some steps closer to the pantry.
he can’t help but think, how long has it been since jake has woke up?
“hey,” jake greets before he can do anything. the older takes off his headset and make a hand gesture towards the breakfast he made. “my friends said i make good coffee. i don’t know if you drink coffee but… if not, uh, i can’t possibly force you into trying them—but maybe you could eat the toast first? i think I have some tea bags stored. oh, wait, do you like strawberry jams—"
“good morning, and that’s so nice of you, jake,” cuts sunghoon finally. chuckling as jake goes dumbfounded and put his palm on his mouth. “and i drink coffee, thank you.”
"great!" jake smiles like he wasn't being embarrassed seconds ago, but it drops almost instantly. "how about strawberry?"
sunghoon holds back his laugh. “i can eat strawberry,” he says, sitting on a bar stool instead on an empty chair in front of jake. afraid of getting crumbs or coffee on jake’s papers—it’s only his first morning here, he can’t afford it.
on his third bite, a song suddenly plays from the dining table. when sunghoon turns his head, jake already took off his headset and let daniel caesar’s voice plays throughout the room from his phone speaker.
sunghoon wants to ask lots of things, but everything stucks on the tip of his tongue when he sees jake focuses on writing on one of the open books. the frown on his forehead gets deeper and there’s a constant knocking sound from his feet, which he lets bumping against the chair legs in front of him. so sunghoon finish his toast (which taste delicious) and coffee made by jake in silence before putting the dirty utensils on the kitchen sink.
“thanks for the breakfast, jake,” sunghoon rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. jake who hears his voice lifts his head then smiles.
"no worries! do you have anything to do? for today."
“maybe just… sorting the rest of my stuffs, and doing my assignments. inside my room, so….”
"sure! yeah, um," jake follows scratching his jaw which sunghoon sure isn’t itchy. “you can use the middle room, i mean. sometimes it’s hot inside the room. and i like it here more instead of the middle room. but—you can do anything that’s comfortable to you...."
"noted," after a nod and another thank you, sunghoon takes big steps to his room.
his phone vibrates when he’s getting his laptop out of his bag. sunghoon roles his eyes immediately when he sees the name heeseung appears on the screen.
heeseung.
how’s jake?
he’s good rite!!
09.22
sunghoon (you)
like you said
he's fine
09.23
sunghoon looks at his own answer. he's more than fine, he thoughts, but heeseung doesn't need to know. after all it’s only his first day living with jake. it’s too fast if he concludes now, isn’t it?
2.
sunghoon’s alarm volume is loud.
very loud, but that morning he sleeps through it. snoring as jake gets inside his room and carefully turning off the alarm.
sunghoon only wakes up around one and a half hour later, after the rain turns into gentle drizzle and half of his legs are hanging on air. he rolls his body until he could reach his phone on the nightstand.
there’s a solid three second stillness happens when his eyes catch the time that shows on his phone, then everything happens fast—sunghoon washing his face, brushing his teeth, until he changes his clothes. he may look funny with his lavender sweater and short brown jeans but he pays zero cares when he realizes his class already started 30 minutes ago.
"shit," he curses while trying to put on his socks while walking. the sound of rain denies his thought of nothing could get worse for today.
"sunghoon?"
"fuck—jake!"
jake holds sunghoon’s hand in front of his own room while the taller tries to catch his breath.
when he succeeds on doing so, he grasps jake’s upper arms and says on his face, panicking, “jake—i know this morning is my turn to do the dishes but i’m unfortunately late so i swear to god i will do anything after i’m done with my class—"
"sunghoon,” now it’s jake’s turn to hold sunghoon’s biceps, tapping it a few times. “breathe.”
sunghoon takes a short-forced breath. “okay. now. i really have to go now—”
“it’s sunday, sunghoon.”
sunghoon blinks confusedly.
he wants to push jake away and not minding what he just said, wants to leave their apartment and go to the campus with his eccentric style. wants to do the things listed knowing he will just meet closed gate and useless attempt. living for a month with jake taughts him that the boy wouldn’t have the heart to jokes in times like this.
realizing sunghoon is freezing in place, jake puts his hands on sunghoon’s shoulder. patting it once, twice, before breaking their physical contacts. “i have a feeling the alarm should be in pm, not am.”
“w—alarm? what alarm? my alarm goes off?”
jake laughs. "your alarm went off around 8, silly. you didn’t wake up, though. i did. i want to wake you up but you were in a deep sleep, i just couldn’t. sorry,” explains jake, pouting. “i really hope you don’t have class in a sunday morning….?”
sunghoon doesn’t know where to put his focus to.
to his stupidness for setting the wrong alarm for his assignment? to the fact that jake saw him sleeping when he goes to turn off his alarm? or to how jake’s lips looks full since the boy is pouting and it makes him looks adorable?
"it's," sunghoon pauses, having difficulty organizing his words. jake waits blinking. "it’s supposed to be my alarm deadline."
"huh?"
"i mean—my deadline alarm. for my assignment. supposed to be later tonight...."
sunghoon kind of want to bury himself alive.
"oh, thank god," jake smiles, then. looking relieved. sunghoon tries to mirror the smile. "well then. i’m making breakfast—what do you think about pancakes?"
"yes," sunghoon trails jake behind to the kitchen. the older looks full of energy that sunghoon can’t help but stare at him when he goes to open the fridge. he’s still staring when jake hums while thinking, tapping his finger against his cheek. his big eyes scanning the rows of food. "want—pancakes, i mean."
jake turns to him and sunghoon is almost late to throws his gaze somewhere else.
unable to take it any longer, sunghoon declares that he’s gonna go change his clothes. his ears go red when jake laughs, agreeing.
3.
sunghoon doesn’t remember how he falls asleep on the pantry.
what he remembers is locke’s theory of behaviorism. the concept of human being is actually a blank canvas ready to be filled with sensory experiences. remembers about iceberg theory from psychoanalysis. remembers everything about the materials that he needs to summarize except when drowsiness starts eating him and he reaches blindly for the arm pillow near him. the shadow of the wall clock that shows 2am was the last thing.
then sunghoon wakes up with warmth surrounding him.
his grey blanket is drapped around his shoulders and the room he’s staying is bright not because of the lamp anymore. he rubs his eyes with his palm before folding his blanket neatly while looking for jake, but what he finds are just emptiness and the clock stated it’s almost 8. sunghoon grunts.
he still has 4 hours but his neck is hurting since he wasn’t sleeping in a proper position and he wants nothing but sleep some more on his bed.
when sunghoon goes to open his laptop—his movement halts. sunghoon doesn’t remember closing his laptop last night. or arranging the references books that he borrowed from the library. or putting his pens and highlighters back into his pensil case.
it gets worse (or better?) when he opens the document that he last worked on last night and found 1500 more words that makes the total of the words is already more than 2000. sunghoon is still dumbfounded when the front door goes open and there’s paper bags sound.
"you're awake!"
jake slides into the kitchen and goes straight to arranging the groceries he just bought while sunghoon is still trying to process what exactly happened.
“you probably haven’t drink anything.”
sunghoon can’t take his sight off jake even when the said boy handed him a glass of water.
"….jake."
"seeing your face, you must haven’t been awake for long. i bought croissants, you should eat it.”
"jake."
jake’s looks back at him with a funny expression before proceeding to put cartons of milk inside the fridge. not responding sunghoon on purpose because he knows sunghoon’s not fully awake to talk with him coherently.
sunghoon ruffles his hair nonchalantly until jake asks him. “you’re not going back to sleep?”
“it’s—my assignment….”
like jake said before, there’s a croissant being pushed his way next to the glass of water, followed by jake that stare at him with titled head. sunghoon wants to say something that would refrain him from saying how jake looks small in his hoodie or why there’s another croissant being given at him.
anything—
“i could kiss you right now.”
—but certainly, not supposedly, that.
jake just laughs out loud, turning that his back is now facing sunghoon. "idiot.”
sunghoon agrees. he is an idiot, realizing that his own jokes don’t sound like one on his own ears makes him feel more stupid.
“you better get more sleep than saying more nonsense,” jake decides. “but eat the croissants first.”
fully aware that he doesn’t have any choices, sunghoon eats his croissants in gigantic bites. he chose to not eat the second package because there’s a possibility that it’s jake’s. in the range of two months sunghoon knowing him, the intensity of jake eating croissant is quite frequent.
jake is playing with his ipad on the dining table when sunghoon tries to conforts him the right way, now.
"jake."
“mm?”
“why is my summary already done?”
jake lifts his head, then simply smiles. “i saw you already marked the sections you’re gonna summarize, also saw the deadline is today. and you looked tired. and i had nothing to do so i type it out,” he describes innocently.
sunghoon never meets someone that looks so happy after voluntarily does someone else’s work without a reward.
"still—why you did that?"
"because i want to," jake shrugs. "it's not a big deal, really. just count it as me cheering you up for the upcoming exams."
sunghoon is not satisfied, yet. "do you—" do you want something in return, jake?
"wait! why don’t you eat the other one?" jake points out accusingly, rising from his seat.
sunghoon frowns, taking the croissant left on his back. "this?"
"yeah," the frowns start to form on jake’s own forehead. "do you not like it?"
"i do!" sunghoon gape at jake who’s pouting. clearly clueless of what to do. "it's... it's not, yours?"
"i bought two because i remember you complaining that their portion is so small, but you like the taste," jake spells out, bringing his attention back on the gadget on his hand in no time. "so nope, it's not mine. it's all yours."
so sunghoon thanks jake. once, twice, five times, until jake couldn’t hold back his laugh anymore and pushes sunghoon to his room. until sunghoon turns to face him and jake forbids him to say anything unless he wants to say that he’s gonna sleep.
“i don’t think i can sleep anymore,” sunghoon admits.
jake rolls his eyes. “then try,” without any notice, he wipes the area under sunghoon’s eyes with his thumb. whispering, “you look like you need it, hoon.”
and then jake leaves—probably back to the dining table and his ipad. walking casually like he does not leave sunghoon with warmth on his skin where jake just touched him, trickling slowly to his neck.
well, this feels new for sunghoon.
4.
when heeseung invites him to a party after the semester is over, sunghoon really doesn’t think much.
like—what could possibly go wrong? as long as jongseong have a very high alcohol tolerance and not letting him, heeseung, and jungwon stranded on a sidewalk the morning after, he thinks it’s just the best if he could enjoy the moment right now. countless drinks in a cup and typical party games. crowded dance floors and blinding lights.
sunghoon remembers one, two things like when a girl tries to kiss him and jongseong pulls him so hard that he stumbles. the result of mcdonalds drive thru that he holds dearly in his arms, sim jaeyun that opens the door under five seconds when he bangs the surface.
remembers another thing when jake lays him down on his bed and rubs his sweaty forehead carefully. making him smile before everything turns black.
the memories that soon turns painful because it’s accompanied by migrainne when he wakes up at 10 in the morning.
sunghoon groans while pulling a pinch of his hair, trying to casts out fireflies that’s invading his sight. grimacing while staring at the ceiling, sunghoon just thinks: this, this is the worst that could happen.
two minutes passes until he notices the existence of tylenol and a glass of water on his nightstand. sunghoon inspects it for awhile, until his head throbs once more and he gulp down the tablet with great effort. even manages to spill some of the water to his clothes.
sighing, sunghoon goes back to sprawl against the bedsheets. his thoughts start to fly everywhere.
speculating that he would probably spends the day with empty stomach and maybe other tablets of tylenol—pathetic. totally pathetic. even his roommate just left him like that (even though if sunghoon thinks a little bit harder… jake indeed doesn’t really have any responsibilities of him).
sunghoon doesn’t expect a session of hangover would bring him to a reality check. now that he thinks about it, he feels like he’s being too comfortable with jake presence on his life. which makes him wonder, what if, what if, jake doesn’t do everything he’s done so far just because they’re roommates? what if jake does it as someone special in his life? that must be nice.
sunghoon wants to know. he wonders and wonders.
his imagination then brings jake inside of his room with a bowl full of hot porridge and a smile on his face that looks too bright when all he’s doing is taking care of a hangover adult.
imaginary-jake then greets him and tells him to sit.
"eat," says imaginary-jake. sunghoon stares at the bowl and imaginary-jake in turns.
he decides he has to use this chance well.
"feed me."
imaginary-jake’s smile is gone for a split second before he lets out a crisp laugh. sunghoon almost regrets it but then there’s a spoon awaits in front of his mouth, and imaginary-jake is sitting near him on the edge of the bed.
"you're awfully spoiled today, hoonie."
"'m not," sunghoon grumbles. "still dizzy," imaginary-jake just shakes his head fondly, still with the corners of his lips pulled upwards.
sunghoon doesn’t know eating porridge in a dream could taste this real and appetizing. the bowl that imajinary-jake brought is soon empty. sunghoon gapes when the top of his head is being rubbed and imajinary-jake swings out of the room.
sunghoon spends some moments to stare blankly at the wall that mocks him in a way. then he slaps himself twice, and finding a grain of processed rice on the bottom of his lips suddenly feels like a nightmare.
he sees jake is cleaning up the kitchen when he walks there after mustering all his strength. the mess on the kitchen is probably the result of jake cooking him the porridge.
"you still hungry?"
it’s hard to believe for sunghoon when that’s the first thing jake asks when he literally just fed a twenty years old man a bowl of food consciously.
“should i re-heat the mcdonalds you brought last night...?"
sunghoon gives up, and it feels good.
it feels good when he ends up finishing the day with lots of netflix series that jake chose and tons of fastfood deliveries (even though there’s time when sunghoon gets embarrassed because jake jokingly asks if he wants to be fed again).
+1.
in his (and jake’s) apartment, sunghoon has woken up to lots of things.
there was a time when he woke up to jake’s music that was louder than the usual, or because of the thunders. sometimes his mom calls him in early mornings. the loudest sound he has woken up to was the sound of vacuum cleaner when jake used it to clean the carpet on the middle room.
so yeah, sunghoon has woken up to basically everything, except this.
---
the broken air conditioner inside his room made him sleep in jake’s room last night.
actually, sunghoon could just sleep on the sofa and sacrifice his legs that are not gonna be accommodated fully, but jake pulled him inside his room before he could put his pillow and bolsters on the sofa.
sunghoon had gone inside jake’s room, couple of times. once to change the light bulb, or when jake asked for his help in changing the room curtains to get washed. the last time he went there jake needed help to install a new decoration for his room: a fabric poster to complete his room aesthetic.
different from sunghoon’s room that’s more minimalist with monochrome colours, jake’s room is more colorful with earth tone pallete and is equipped with more furnitures that he bought himself. always being dominated with calming vanilla jasmine scent. which supposed to help sunghoon sleep, next to jake who was snoring already.
being surrounded by sim jaeyun’s scent, the proximity was dizzying. the bolster that sat between them in the middle didn’t help at all. sunghoon couldn’t close his eyes for more than a few seconds, not when the sight of jake sleeping peacefully was interesting more than anything. thus, the drowsiness attacked him exactly like that: facing jake while he held his own bolster for dear life. he was afraid his hand would unconsciously reach out for jake if he didn’t hold something to sleep.
and sunghoon is supposed not to be surprised when he wakes up to jake being much closer than the night before, hugging two bolsters instead of one.
it will be cliché if sunghoon says he want to run his fingers through jake’s fringe, but with being not fully awake and morning is still halfway, it’s easy for sunghoon to admit it. easy for sunghoon to admit that jake makes him stunned very easily these days with every single thing he does. easy for him to admit that jake makes it hard for him to hold back his smile when sunghoon pick him up after class and the older waves at him excessively. easy for him to admit that he wants to hold jake’s hand when they’re walking side by side from the supermarket with shopping bag on one hand.
easy for him to admit he doesn’t want whatever it is between them platonic.
"you're staring."
jake hides half of his face on the bolster that he pulls upward when he woke up with sunghoon’s focus fully on him.
sunghoon doesn’t dodge.
"it’s hard not to," answers sunghoon. brutally honest. "it’s not everyday i woke up with someone beside me."
jake laughs hoarsely and sunghoon lets himself speak without filter.
"i could kiss you right now."
god, that line again.
the arch of jake’s lips oddly looks prettier than the usual that morning. "because i didn’t let you sleep on the sofa?"
sunghoon shakes his head.
jake’s smile fade for a bit.
"because i want to.”
it’s quiet for some seconds before jake closes his eyes feeling overwhelming: because of sunghoon and his honesty.
"i want it too. but i have morning breath," jake murmurs. a shade of pink starts to bloom on his apple cheeks.
sunghoon actually doesn’t care but he also wants to make sure jake feels comfortable if they’re really gonna get into a new territory. so he offers jake an option.
"a hug, then?"
then sunghoon finds himself with arms full of jake not even five seconds after. it feels warm moreover when jake snuggles into his collarbones, sunghoon own fingers are floating hesitantly above of jake’s waist until the boy guides him to hug him properly.
"i like you, a lot," jake murmurs out of nowhere. hearing it makes sunghoon wants to jump in delight, but for now he just hugs jake tighter.
"me too."
"say it! duh."
sunghoon chuckles while inhaling the smell of jake’s shampoo deeply. "i like you a lot too, jakey. go on a date with me?"
jake says yes.
and they don’t call the technician to fix sunghoon’s room air conditioner, in the end.