Chapter Text
It was pitch black in the camp save for the sparse lanterns that glowed dimly against the night. You pull closer your coat, trying to protect yourself from the frigid russian air. Sleep evaded you for yet another night. The lack of sleep made your whole body ache in a way that made you want to collapse. But it was never enough to let you sleep. There was always something that kept your eyes open and locked on the underside of the bunk above you until the morning sun poked over the horizon.
You were careful in making sure no one realized you were still awake. Always staying quiet in the late hours, as well as masking your drowsiness with coffee and lies. But tonight your body itched. It itched to move. So carefully you slipped from your bunk slipping on your boots and coat. The camp was quiet this late at night. It was unusual, given how bustling and loud it was during the day.
Your joints protested slightly as you walked, heading in no particular direction besides forwards. Frost crunched under your boots as you walked, finally being able to relax in the silence of the night. It was peaceful, being alone and isolated with your thoughts as you walked mindlessly. You weren’t sure how long you had been walking before you realized someone was walking besides you silently. His bulking frame comforting instead of frightening.
“Beautiful night isn’t it soldier?” He said softly, breath misting behind his black mask. You look him over, unsure if you were going to get in trouble for being out and about so late. But Ivan didn’t seem to mention it. He just walked calmly beside you. Silence returned over the camp as you both walked.
After a couple of minutes Ivan started to take the lead, and you followed silently beside him. Eventually you ended up at his tent. Ivan held the flap open for you, watching as you stepped inside. The space was warm, decorated in nothing more than the usual cot, chest, and desk. It was surprisingly bare for a captain’s quarters.
“Sit.” He said, not quite an order. His tone was soft, something you heard occasionally when he comforted the other soldiers. You fidget with your coat as you sit down on the edge of his cot, looking down at your hands in your lap as opposed to Ivan. He turns his desk chair around and sits, leaning forward a bit.
“You haven’t been sleeping.” He states. You open your mouth to deny. To lie and say that you were getting rest today you just couldn’t. Or maybe that tonight you just so happened to wake up. But nothing left your mouth. Your words never came because you knew Ivan wouldn’t even bother to believe you. So you just fell back into silence, closing your mouth. It seemed like enough of an answer to Ivan.
“I can see it in your eyes. And the way you move. You haven’t been sleeping much if at all for a long time.” He continues. You purse your lips and deflate a little. There wasn’t a fight in you anymore. No reason to fight him. He was right. You haven’t been sleeping. And it was affecting your performance.
“Soldier..This isn’t healthy, or safe. Im worried about you.” That one hurt. You never wanted to cause the captain pain. But you didn’t know what you could do. It just wasn’t possible for you to sleep. Something was always missing or wrong or.. You sigh heavily, tugging your coat closer despite the warmth of the tent. Ivan relaxes, taking a deep breath. “Here, you can sleep in my tent, until we can figure out something that can help you sleep.”
You look up at him, confusion clear on your expression. “Sleep here? But what about you?” You start to protest, guilt washing over you. Ivan waved a hand. “There is a spare tent. I will sleep there.” The captain stands, turning to leave. Instinctively your hand jerks out, grabbing his sleeve. “Wait-!” Both of you freeze, a tense moment passing before you clarify.
“W-wait..Stay..please.” Your voice is quiet and tight in your throat. “I don't want to be alone.” Tears threaten to spill and you don’t even know the reason. Hearing your desperation, Ivan relaxes, turning back to you. “Alright. I will stay.” He says gently, resting a warm hand over yours still clinging to his coat sleeve.
You hesitate momentarily before releasing him. “Take off your coat and boots, my cot should be big enough for us both.” Ivan says, tossing his own coat over his desk chair. You avoid eye contact as you do the same, leaving your boots by and bed and your coat over the chair. Ivan’s blankets are soft and warm when you slip under them. You turn your back to the room scooting towards the wall so he can have room to lay down. There is a bit of shuffling before Ivan lays down behind you, the bed dipping. Comforting heat washes over you as he slips under the blankets.
“Come here.” He huffs warmly, tugging you against his chest. You squeak a little being so close to him, his chest pressed against your back and one arm tossed loosely over your midsection. He is so warm and you can't help but relax against him. The warmth seeps deep into your bones, to the ache that rests there from days without real rest. The ache slowly thawing and releasing it’s death grip on you. Ivan’s steady breathing something you try to match, feeling your eyes begin to get heavy. It only took a moment before you were asleep against him, finally able to relax.