Archive of Our Own

The first time Hugo feels a twinge of jealousy over Varian it feels like a shock to his system. If you asked him about it, he’d scoff. “Jealous? Of goggles? You mean the pipsqueak I want to punt like a football? Never.”

But there’s something that tugs at his heart whenever he sees him talking to Nuru and Yong. The way they smile and laugh at all his jokes. The way they watch him with interest as he describes random facts about alchemy. The way they like being his friend.

The way they’d rather talk to Varian than him.

That last thought only spikes his jealousy further. Why? He was perfectly charming and funny in his own right. He was hard-working, cunning, and clever. What was so great about Varian, anyway? He was pretentious, in over his head, and he was good.

He is good.

Varian is good.

And Hugo’s not.

That’s probably why no one liked him. It didn’t matter how fun or quick-witted he was if it meant he’s only out for himself and not willing to look out for others.

To an extent, Hugo understands this. He knows he hasn’t done anything to deserve the kindness of the group or anyone for that matter. He still wants it though. Maybe if he had been shown kindness in the first place he wouldn’t find himself being the con-artist he was.

Somewhere in his heart, Hugo yearns for affection. He yearns for love. For the soft hands on the shoulder, for the laughter, for the friendship of the group.

He sits alone on the log in front of the fire, watching as Nuru, Yong, and Varian laugh on the log across from him.

The flames do nothing to warm the coldness he feels.

If the first time Hugo was jealous was a shock, this was… something else entirely. He wasn’t jealous of what Varian had this time. He was jealous he didn’t have Varian.

He didn’t have Varian’s admiration or even so much as a smile. Anytime Varian had smiled genuinely, it was always to Yong or to Nuru. The closest Hugo had gotten was sarcastic smirks.

Hugo didn’t understand his feelings. Why did he want Varian’s attention of all people? Varian had done nothing but bicker with and make a fool of him.

Still, every day when he saw Varian he started to do things to get his attention. Of course, this only resulted in on and off arguing to which Hugo may have gotten his feelings hurt a few too many times than he was willing to admit to himself or others.

It was stupid, to be frank. There was no reason for him to want Varian’s attention, especially after today. Varian had found that ignoring Hugo whenever he tried bickering with him proved to be very effective in getting a rise out of the blond. Most of the day Varian had barely spoken a word to him and it sparked every nerve in Hugo’s body with anger.

He hated to admit it but his skin crawled in irritation as he waited for the other shoe to drop only for nothing to happen. He’d hurled insult after insult at the boy, all marked with his signature smirk of condescension only for Varian to act like he didn’t exist. It stung more than Hugo cared to say.

Still, as he went to sleep at the Inn that night, he felt jealousy creep through his body, the cold and lonesome bed only furthering his soured mood. He was jealous of the way the others talked to Varian so closely. He was jealous of how genuinely happy he looked talking to them instead of him. He was jealous of the way Varian clearly didn’t care about their relationship as much as Hugo did.

A part of him, a small bitter and resentful part of him wanted to march over to the alchemist's room and just yell his frustrations. He wanted to argue and scream about how unfair it all was and how badly he wished Varian would show him kindness too. He wanted the other to know he wouldn’t mind a small smile or laugh here and there or a small “How are you?”

A louder, smarter part of him convinces him to stay, no matter how lonely it is.

Of all the things Hugo expected to come across during their travels, Varian’s absolutely massive family was not one of them. When the two had first met, the thief had momentarily thought the boy was homeless with no family at all purely from his weight and the bags under his eyes. He had known his mother was dead from Donella’s information and assumed that her other half had croaked too. He was only proven wrong when he had brought up his dad still being alive.

He did that a lot, actually. The whole bringing up his dad thing, he means. Hugo often found himself rubbing at his temples and groaning anytime the old geezer was brought up in conversation. It was hard not to roll his eyes anytime Varian would tell cheesy stories of bedtimes and warm meals. A part of Hugo stung every time it was brought up, a twinge of raging jealousy at having a nice home life, or a home life at all. Every time it was talked about it took every nerve in the blond’s body to not tell him to just shut up.

At the very least, it was tolerable. Yes, it made him grit his teeth and suck in frustrated breaths and fill him with the sudden urge to smack his head off a wall as hard as possible, but he could deal.

Now a family of seven cousins was much less doable.

When they had first arrived and Hugo watched with a nauseous gut as all the cousins gushed and welcomed Varian with laughs and playful jabs, the thief had crossed his arms over his chest, eyes narrowed in bitter envy. He rolled his eyes as they walked into the house, quickly striding over and placing a hand on the alchemist’s shoulder to catch him before he went inside.

“So were you going to tell us you just had a massive family tree or…?” The blond barely made any attempt to hide the sour tone of his question which got Varian to raise a brow as he held in an almost offended huff.

“I didn’t even know they were here.” He defended himself adamantly with a stern tone, though he didn’t raise his voice. “My dad never really talked about them since they were on my mom’s side. He never got to know them.”

Hugo sucked a breath in through his nose, a sardonic smirk making its way onto his lips as he vaguely attempted to cover his petty jealousy. “But you still knew,” he continued, trying to reign in his irritation. “How come you never told us?”

Varian dismissively raised a brow, brushing the tall male’s hand off his shoulder, his patience for the thief’s immaturity wearing thin. “Why do you care? It’s not like it was important.” He turned his gaze away. “Besides, the only time you’ve ever been invested in my personal life was when you wanted to bicker about it to feel better about yourself.”

Hugo stiffened, a sour taste left in his mouth at how true the statement was. “That’s not true.” He instantly interjected, shaking his head. He blew a hot puff of air as a few messy strands of blond hair fell into his face. “I care about people! I care about things! Maybe I’m just interested in you as a person. Did you ever think of that?”

Varian scoffed, abruptly swiveling around to give the lanky man a skeptical glare. “You can’t name one thing about my personal life if you tried!”

Hugo sputtered, hands flailing wildly as he fumbled to grasp anything from the depths of his mind. “You-- You like keeping a stupid journal about Raccoon behaviors because of that stupid little Ruthie--”

“Ruddiger.”

“-Whatever, Ruddiger, because you worry yourself sick over trivial things that don’t even matter.” The man shoved his glasses further up his nose, hoping his look of vexation wasn’t visible.

Varian scoffed, his lips pulling back into an offended sneer. “Great! Now this time do it without insulting me if you “care” about me so bad!”

The blond looked at him in silence before groaning with irritation. “I’m done with this.”

“Fine.” Varian spat, turning his back to the other, placing a hand on the door, ready to follow his cousins. “I’ll go hang out with people who actually care about me and be a functioning family. Maybe you could learn something from them.”

Hugo choked down an argument, the sudden sting of the words ripping through his heart harshly. “Fine…” He mumbled, walking away as the alchemist stepped into the house. He felt childish anger and entitlement well up in his gut at the thought of Varian being back in a warm home surrounded by welcoming grins and soft meals while Hugo stood outside in the cold, alone and angry. He snickered to himself.

Old habits die hard.

“This is stupid.” Hugo clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, fingers impatiently drumming against his crossed arms. “So stupid.” He watched with an unimpressed stare as Varian continued to study the small gem brooches with a careful gaze, nose scrunched in concentration. He sighed with every hum of contemplation that the boy gave.

“So are you gonna choose something or what?” The thief finally spoke, placing a hand on the alchemist’s shoulder as he stood behind him. He stepped back a bit when Varian let out a rough sigh knowing it meant the other was becoming irritated.

“Yes, I will! It just has to be perfect…” Varian placed a hand to his chin in thought, staring down at the counter of brooches, not daring to even touch a single one and devalue it by smudging fingerprints on it.

Behind him, the blond groaned again, his patience slowly winding away. “The princess doesn’t care how you’ll look once you get back, freckles, or if she does, then you shouldn’t care. You don’t need the approval of some stuck up royal.”

The dark-haired boy rolled his eyes, finally tearing his attention away from the jewelry to glare at Hugo. “She’s not some “stuck up royal,” she’s my friend and she’s throwing a welcome back ball party for me when I get back. I wanna look nice!”

The thief huffed with disinterest. “Well, I’m not waiting around for your lame nerd party or you getting ready for it. If you need me I’m gonna be over there.”

Varian shrugged, ignoring the boy as he went back to staring at the brooches. He perked up when the merchant spoke to him. “You know, prettyboy, I could help you find something.”

The alchemist slightly paused at the woman’s wording, but brushed it off with a polite smile. “Uh, yeah! That’d be great!”

Hugo, on the other hand, had only taken two steps away but now stopped dead in his tracks and looked over his shoulder to watch the two interact.

“Well,” the woman began, “maybe something blue would fit you.” She looked over her brooches, picking a few blue ones, holding them up in front of her as she looked at them. She glanced between a dark blue one and the freckled boy’s face before smiling slyly. “This one really brings out your eyes.” She raised her brows a bit.

Hugo’s lips pressed into a thin frown, his eyes narrowing as he felt something stupidly angry sting at his chest at the woman’s advances.

“Ah, well--” Varian went to respond, only to be interrupted by Hugo coming up behind him again, grabbing him by the shoulder.

“Actually, we’re all good. Thanks.” He growled bluntly with a glare, guiding Varian away despite his minor protests. Finally the boy wriggled away from Hugo’s grip, turning to look at him with exasperation.

“Hugo! I wasn’t done!--”

“So? That woman was obviously flirting with you!” Hugo defended with haste, his tone gruff.

Varian looked at him with scorn. “So?! Who cares?! I could’ve bought that and been out of there in no time! I can handle myself! Why do you care so badly?!”

Hugo blinked, his hands balling into angry fists at the question. Why did he care so badly? It wasn’t like Varian couldn’t perfectly handle himself and it’s not like the boy had ever shown interest in making pit stops for any sort of romantic rendezvous, so it’s not like they would be wasting time.

But when he saw the woman flirting with Varian, his friend, something in him just felt so wrong. How dare she flirt with Varian when she doesn’t know a single thing about him?! She didn’t know how Varian always snorted before he broke out into laughter or that he’d nervously chew his bottom lip when he was anxious. She didn’t know the way he flicked people on the head if they were annoying him by being in his personal space or the way his lips were always chapped because he never used lip balm. She didn’t know Varian, not the way Hugo did.

Oh.

Oh.

“Because we don’t need to waste time here. We can buy you a dumb little brooch somewhere else where it wont take a million years because the merchant is throwing themselves at the Royal Engineer.” Hugo responded, turning his back and walking back over to Yong and Nuru as Varian’s boots clicked against the road behind him.

He’d shoved his true feelings away for now, but oddly enough it felt okay for once. He didn’t have to tell Varian now or soon. They had enough time.

For now, he’d just make sure the boy was happy.

Varian had his fair share of being jealous in the past. He was constantly overshadowed while the kids around him weren’t. Even when he worked hard, his dad ignored him while other kids always got praised for every small thing. He was jealous of all the kids in his village for getting large accomplishments and for having more functional families.

He was even jealous when he worked at the castle. While he lived there he still found himself feeling bitter any time he’d see Rapunzel talking to her mom and hugging her or when Eugene and her would laugh together. Even if he and his father’s relationship had changed and was steadily improving after the amber incident, he still felt upset seeing how easily love and communication came for Rapunzel. It still stung.

Regardless, as much as he hated the feeling, it was manageable. Varian had long since overcome his angry outbursts and urges to act on his feelings. He’d come a long way since being a younger kid and he’d learned to cope with his feelings healthily for the most part.

Turns out being jealous of a certain blond thief really throws a wrench in that whole healing thing.

Being jealous of Hugo was something Varian certainly didn’t expect, let alone it being a frequent experience. The more and more the alchemist spent with the idiotic thief the more he found himself growing jealous. Anytime Varian said something witty, Hugo was always there to oneup him. Anytime Varian created anything helpful, Hugo was more than enthused to point out it’s flaws and fix it. Anything Varian did, Hugo was somehow able to do better.

To an extent, Varian supposed he should be grateful. Not only did Hugo point out flaws and mistakes in his inventions that could help prevent future disasters, he was always there to knock the alchemist down a peg. In Varian’s opinion, everyone needed a little humility every once in a while. Being overly confident can lead to carelessness and insensitivity and Varian didn’t mind being put in his place from time to time.

But why did it have to be from the world’s most annoying person?

There was having a little humility and then there was just being utterly embarrassed at being knocked down at every corner of your life. Pure humiliation was never good for anyone if there was no self-confidence to balance it out.

Luckily, after lots of effort and communication, the two found themselves actively admiring one another and even helping each other out. The two had happily completed the trials with the help of Yong and Nuru and they had become closer than Varian ever thought they would. The alchemist was content with Hugo’s accomplishments, proud even, and the boy knew he’d never be jealous because of Hugo again.

Or so he thought.

When the gang had finished the trials, they all went to Corona to go to the party Rapunzel was throwing in celebration. (Varian still insisted on wearing that stupid brooch on his suit.) Varian helped Hugo get suited up while Yong and Nuru excitedly ran out into the ballroom, Nuru chatting with Rapunzel joyfully while Yong danced excitedly in the sea of people peacefully slow dancing.

Apparently getting Hugo to wear a nice suit was harder than he thought.

“Hold still.” Varian admonished, fastening the last few buttons over the man’s chest before brushing off the man’s narrow shoulders. He stood back to look at Hugo with a proud stare. “There! All done!”

Hugo was less than pleased to be dressed to the nines with frilly cloth and gold embroidery. “Okay, I get we’re at a party, but why do I have to be dressed all fancy?” His lips pressed into a thin frown, mild irritation in his eyes. “It’s a party to celebrate our victory, I think the folks can live to see one of the people of the hour wearing casual clothes.”

Varian rolled his eyes. “It’s not going to kill you to wear a suit for the night.” He smiled softly, looking the man up and down. “Besides… You look nice.”

Hugo’s brows raised in surprise, a light pink dusting his cheeks. “Oh. Well, thanks…” He coughed into his fist, stepping forward. “I-I guess it’s okay, heh. What are we waiting for? Let’s get out there!”

As the night progressed Varian found himself happily laughing and talking to the people. He caught up with Rapunzel and Eugene about the castle and how it’s been without him working there. He talked to Faith briefly who had occasionally chatted with him in his lab when he was working. He even got to see Lance with Kiera and Catalina.

It wasn’t until a few hours in when things started to go awry. He had mostly left Hugo to his own devices, but he wished he hadn’t.

He had spotted the blond male sitting in the corner of the room mostly avoiding the thick of people in the room. Varian felt slightly bad for catapulting a socially awkward ex-convict into a stressful party setting and decided to make his way over.

“Hugo, hey--” He abruptly stopped when another man approached the blond, a smug smile across his lips. He watched carefully with a brow crooked as he slowly stepped forward a bit to listen in.

“So, you here alone?” The man smiled slyly, eyes lidded.

Hugo chuckled lightly. “Nope. Came here with some friends. It’s a party for us finishing the trials.” He swirled the cup of punch in his hand mindlessly.

“Ah, you must be that Hugo fellow.” The man looked Hugo up and down with interest, licking his lips. “They weren’t lying, you’re not too bad looking, prettyboy.”

Oh. One of those people. Hugo could have fun with this. “Heh, thanks. I get that a lot.” He smirked, running a hand through his thick mop of hair. “You’re not too bad yourself.”

The man opened his mouth to speak again, but Hugo never got to hear it as he was suddenly pulled away by a grip on his arm. “Wh-?” He didn’t see who it was until he was dragged into the halls and away from the party. Latched onto his arm was a particularly vexed Varian, grumbling to himself under his breath.

Hugo suddenly dug his feet into the ground, pulling his arm out of the alchemist's grip, irritation and confusion in his eyes. “What the hell, goggles? What gives?”

Varian turned, looking at Hugo over his shoulder. “That guy was flirting with you!”

Hugo blinked. “So?”

“And you were flirting back!”

“So?” Hugo repeated.

“Ugh! I-I just--!” Varian sighed, hiding the hurt in his eyes as he looked away. He felt stupidly ashamed and embarrassed for getting angry at something Hugo was entirely within his rights to do. “Nevermind…” He mumbled as he began to walk away only to stop dead in his tracks as Hugo spoke.

“Holy shit, V, are you jealous?”

Varian froze. He blinked once or twice before sighing. “Yeah… I am… Go ahead, you can laugh. I know it’s stupid and I shouldn’t be getting jealous over something that’s not even important, but--”

“Freckles,” Hugo placed a hand on the other’s shoulder, turning him to look at him, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Varian shrugged. “I-I thought it was dumb to be jealous of you… I thought you’d laugh or make fun of me.”

“Oh my god.” Hugo scoffed lightly, smiling softly although not mockingly. He sat down on the floor, back to the wall as he patted the spot next to him for Varian to sit. “Vare, I’ve been jealous of you more times than I can count.”

Varian raised a brow as he sat next to Hugo cross legged. “Of what?”

“I don’t know, everything?” The blond laughed. “The way you were always so smart and able to befriend everyone so quickly… The way you could easily brush off conflict or care for negative things… The way you have such a large and loving family, even with just your dad… Everything.”

Varian gave a disbelieving chuckle. “Really? I’m jealous of all those things with you. You were always able to one up me with more clever ideas or wittier jokes. How you were always so willingly open to expressing your anger instead of hiding it… How you always had a connection over alchemy with Donella… me and my dad are pretty close, yea, but… he never really liked my alchemy. He never understood it and he always shut me down when I tried to impress him with it.”

“Huh.” Hugo hummed with authentic interest and amazement at the boy practically mirroring his jealousy. “And you know what the dumbest part is? I got jealous when that stupid merchant flirted with you.”

Varian smiled, a sudden blush rushing to his cheeks. “Heh, well, I got jealous of that guy flirting with you… obviously.” He looked at Hugo gently.

The two laughed quietly at the irony of the situation until the two were only softly looking at one another. “Can I kiss you?” The blond whispered.

Varian’s heart skipped a beat. “Yeah! I-I mean, yeah… Okay…”

The ex-thief slowly cupped the alchemist’s face as said alchemist wrapped his arms around Hugo’s neck, the two drawing nearer and nearer until their lips met. It was sloppy and unsure, but god it was just perfect.

The two pulled away, quietly looking into each other's eyes with fondness and love. “I think I’m in love with you.” Varian breathlessly whispered.

Hugo snickered before laughing. “I would hope so! If you’re not, you really shouldn’t be running around smacking lips with random dudes.” He teased.

Varian abruptly turned away, flicking Hugo’s nose. “Shut up!” Both him and Hugo knew his word held no true malice as he joyfully giggled at the man before falling into a long but comfortable silence.

“For the record, I think I’m in love with you too.”