Work Text:
"Why can I just not write?" I think, throwing my expensive fountain pen against the paper of my notebook once again. I thought today I could finally make a start on a story that had been occupying my mind for days on end but alas, I find myself in the same catacombs of uninspiration I've spent the last few weeks in. I've made starts, I've torn out pages, I've blamed the heat, I've blamed the cold, I've blamed the people around me but here I sit, alone, the only distraction the music playlist I use to stop myself BEING distracted. I'm not sure what the problem is, I just know that I can't, not today and it's been like this for weeks. My publishers send me emails asking for updates in the creative process and the only thing I can respond with is some shaky excuse of a town festival, a request I had to do or, the latest lie from my imagination, my house has been flooded by excess rainfall so I'm a little busy Katy please piss off. Of course, this is entirely fictional, the only bit of fiction I've managed to write. Pelican Town is currently in the midst of a horrible heatwave. It feels foolish to complain after all my family originates from French vineyards, but after five years living in a place where thunderstorms are the highlight of Summer, a Summer as dry as Pierre's sarcastic humour is something else. The rivers have never looked so low for as long as I've been here, Marnie is complaining about overheating animals, begging Yoba for rainfall and Swan the farmer is despairing about having to water her crops twice a day instead of once. Gus is talking about an ice shortage, however the hell that happens, Pierre complains that all his produce is rotting faster than he can sell it, as is Willy, and Shane is about one or two refused breaks by Morris from suing Joja Mart. I was walking by there a couple of days ago and spotted Shane face down in the half-empty river. Of course, knowing his history, I was slightly concerned so I called out to the man, asking if he was ok. He simply gave me the thumbs up and rolled onto his back to show a lazy grin. Satisfied, I left him be.
I shake myself from my long-winded personal monologue and pick up my pen in sweaty hands. I write two, maybe three worders and end up throwing the pen again. Usually, in times of great unispiration, I would go for a walk, but it's far too hot for that. I'm practically sat at my desk in a pool of sweat and I'm only wearing shorts. My hair is pulled into a rather unflattering pile on top of my head and I'm not sure I'm presentable enough for my usual route. Sure, there's a slim chance anyone would also be out in this heat but I'd rather not risk Shane looking out of his window and spotting me like this. It's pathetic, I know, he's not the most put-together man himself, but I'd rather be locked into a children's book series contract than let a man I have feelings for see me in a less than preferable state. Shane being Shane, he wouldn't call me out on it, the most he'd go for would be a slightly snide comment, then back to regular conversation. He's a kind man, underneath the gruff exterior, a man who cares the world for his daughter, his chickens, his friends, it is my foolish fantasy that I might be a part of that latter category. I hope I am, he's certainly become a lot warmer to me after I gave him that extra pizza I accidentally bought. It seems like he has very low standards... Well, I can be won over by a well-timed pomegranate, I'm not sure I'm one to talk.
I shake my head, my thoughts have wandered yet again! I wrench my focus back to the page, now where was I again? Something about romantic subtext and love language. I start writing a paragraph and find myself sinking into my words a little easier than before. I almost begin to enjoy the process, almost like where the story is going, for once my dialogue doesn't feel clumsy and my characters spring from the page. My wrist can barely keep up with my thoughts, my words are finally inspired... And then I hit a hurdle. I stop in the middle of a sentence and realise that god-fucking-damnit I've hit a massive plot hole, something that means that the scene I've just written is nothing more than another page that belongs in my scrap paper bin! With a noise that starts out as a groan but finishes as more of a scream, I tear out the last three pages and throw them as hard as I can against the wall, my fountain pen flying with them. The pages bounce off the wall and miss the bin completely which serves only to enrage me further. I throw my face into my hands and belatedly realise I'm still screaming. I clamp my mouth shut and remember in the mortified silence that there are likely people spending their Summer afternoon relaxing on the beach who my idiot ass probably just scared the hell out of. That's it, I'm never leaving this cottage again. Suddenly, there's a knock on my door, this is it, this is how I perish.
"Everything alright in there El?" Came the voice of Shane, halfway between laughter and concern with a hint of drowsiness. I sigh and open the door. He's stood there a little awkwardly, rubbing sleep from his eyes and in a similar state of appearances as I am. His ears are a little burnt.
"Yes Shane, I'm ok." I glance out past his shoulder and check the beach, thankfully, it appears he was the only one on it.
"You sure mate?" He leans past me and observes my cabin, I try not to get embarrassed.
"Yeah just having..." I glare at my notebook with the venom of a thousand snakes. "...Creative difficulties."
Shane follows my gaze to my desk and raises an eyebrow at the half-torn page. Then he looks at the crumpled pages in the corner and the fountain pen I hadn't realised had actually smashed upon impact with the wooden wall. Oh shit.
"You ever thought about taking a break?" He asks, eyes not leaving the fountain pen, ink seeping into the carpet, "Especially in this heat."
"I wish I could but I haven't put anything out in months." My head returns to my hand, rubbing my eyes.
He shrugs. "So what's one day more, huh?"
I look up from my hands and see the kind smile on his face, giving his point of view a quick consider, pretending like I wouldn't follow him anywhere if he asked me to.
"I guess."
Shane's small smile breaks out into a large grin and he swoops his arm in an inviting gesture to the beach outside. I follow, but almost flinch back inside at the bright sunlight, it feels as if I am a literal vampire, the power of the sun not like a warm kiss, more like a harsh burn. I should probably put suncream on, or a hat. Before I can head back inside, he places a hand on my back and steers me towards the sea.
"Jas and Marnie are further out but I prefer to stay by the shore, do you wanna come in too?"
I look down at my current outfit.
"I'm not dressed for it."
He shrugs. "Neither am I." It's true, he's definitely not wearing swim trunks, they look almost like his usual shorts, "It's not like they'll stay damp for long in this heat."
"That's true"
He grins and wades into the water, I slip off my flip-flops and head into the surf. The water is cool against my skin but not unpleasant in the slightest, the current is low and there's not too many fish nibbling at my toes. Shane is a little further in, submerged shoulder deep and looking back at me with a mischievous glint in his eye.
"C'mon scardey cat, get in!" He mocks.
I cross my arms and pout. "I am in!"
"To your knees El! You can do better than that!"
I take a couple of steps and then stop, glaring at him. I am simply trying to wind him up now, it doesn't seem to be working, I think it's funny.
"Better?"
He laughs and shakes his head but doesn't try and coax me in further in, simply grins and continues treading water. I'm about to ask why when little hands push at the small of my back with surprising strength, forcing me face down into the water. I resurface, spitting saltwater from my mouth and jolting yet more water from my ears to hear the telltale laughter of a little girl.
"Jas!" I yell, no venom to it in the slightest. Her response is only laughter as she swims over to her father who gives her a half-hug before resuming his water-treading.
"Atta girl Jas." Shane laughs, I stick my tongue out at the two before swimming out to join them, I'm greeted with a wave of water from a splash. Good technique.
"I'm here now! C'mon, no need to splash!"
"It took you long enough Uncle Elliott!"
My brain short circuits and I freeze, barely functioning except to keep treading water. Uncle Elliott? I'm Uncle Elliott? There's a warmth bubbling in my chest and I can't stop myself from breaking out into the biggest grin. Their conversation almost fades into the background as my thoughts and inner monologue effectively scream in happiness. A child's favour is the greatest honour. I barely even register Jas waving goodbye with a couple of coins clutched in her fist, of course, I wave back. I then turn to face Shane who is returning my grin tenfold.
"She's taken a real shine to you, huh?" He laughs, a little high-pitched, close to a giggle.
"It's adorable, you've raised such a lovely kid."
He adverts his gaze and I see a faint pink dust on his cheek.
"Yeah, she's a gem."
I bump elbows with him gently. "It takes a good dad to raise a good kid."
He laughs. "Thanks man."
We choose then to roll onto our backs and float with the assistance of the saltwater. The sun beats down on us and I am almost certainly burning. Ah, I'll face the consequences of my actions tomorrow. There are small snippets of unimportant conversation and I find my eyes drifting closed.
"Jas isn't the only one who's taken a shine to you." He mumbles after a little while. I crack open my left eye and glance over. He's staring up at the sky, his arms crossed over his stomach, his face giving away no clue as to what he meant by that. I respond with a simple "hmm?".
He turns a little towards me and I see a glimpse of a smile that I don't think I've ever seen before, it makes my heart beat faster and a slight heat tinges my cheeks.
"I think you're pretty cool," Shane says and quite frankly my heart almost explodes. For the second time today, my brain short-circuits. I try and force some words out but the only way I can respond is a soft gasp.
"Oh."
And then I cough. Great job Elliott, A+ communication skills. Quite deservedly, he turns a little and mocks me.
"Oh." He says and then does the most unhealthy cough I think I have ever heard. I erupt into laughter and almost struggle to stay afloat, I move a little further ashore and touch my feet down before I injure myself. Shane follows me, giggling too and standing properly> I finally recover from my laughing fit and give him the fondest look I can manage.
"I think you're pretty cool too."
He returns my look with a tenderness in his eyes I had hardly believed was possible for him. My heart beats loudly in my chest as we stare into each other's eyes. I'm probably romanticising it, from an outsider's perspective, it must look quite odd but in my head it's electric.
"What's with your hair today?" He says, somehow managing not to break our spell.
"Hmm?" My hand flits to my hair self-consciously, the electricity is still there.
"It's usually prettier."
I raise an eyebrow, unsure if that's a compliment or not, he smiles.
"You still look nice like this though, you always do."
And that's the breaking point, a sweet little compliment that sends a current through me. Without even thinking, I lean forward and take his jaw in my hand, he looks slightly panicked so I leave it loose, with ample room for him to pull away. I gently pull him closer to me and his eyes flutter shut. Our lips connect in a burst of colour and we kiss. His hand moves up to my hair, holding me in place for a more passionate kiss than I originally intended. It's a kiss that's leaving me weightless, my head in the clouds. It's a kiss that makes me elated. It's a kiss that I never want to end. It has to though, air is a necessary thing, and we have to break apart. We're panting for air, his hand still in my hair and our eyes have not broken their connection.
"Why did you-" Shane stutters, previous confidence dissipated. Apparently, it's gone to me since my next move is to say everything I have ever thought.
"Because I think you're sweet, kind, lovable and would like for you to be by my side for the foreseeable future."
He looks taken aback.
"You- really?"
I nod. "I do."
"For the foreseeable future?"
I didn't realise I had said that, I swallow roughly and nod again. "Would you like to go on a date sometime?"
He grins. "Absolutely, the saloon take your fancy?"
I scrunch up my nose. "How about a romantic boat ride?"
"A gridball game?"
In the distance I can hear Marnie calling for Shane, he looks around and gets up, offering me a hand. I take it and pull myself up.
"We'll figure it out!" I say happily. We bid each other farewell with a soft kiss to each other's cheeks and I head back to my cabin.
I sit down at my desk again to write that night, after clearing up the debris I had created, and ideas come to me. I write freely and send a first draft off within a couple of days. It's amazing what a break can do.