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Athena has a nightmare. There’s nothing worse than forgetting the small details of someone you loved. Especially their voice.
It’s a dark, narrow hallway, crushing her tall figure at every angle. She can’t breathe.
In the distance is a figure she doesn’t recognize. The blood in her veins freeze faster than her movements. With a shattered gasp, she tries to lift her feet off the ground, but she’s stuck. She looks down to see tar slowly sinking her into the ground, wrapping around her body as it sticks to her skin.
Now she can’t run.
The figure moves with heavy steps, taking their sweet time to get to her. She isn’t sure what to do when the figure breathes down her neck. With a shaky breath, she turns around to see her mother.
Her eyes are dim, without any life in them as she gives the weakest smile.
“Oh, Athena,” Her mother’s voice is disjointed with voices she doesn’t recognize. Athena can’t place it, but the voice is far more masculine than she would have remembered from her mom. She already knows who it is. She just needs to remind herself, and she’ll break from the illusion.
It’s just the phantom…
“You were always such a massive burden. I could have flourished without you being a pest by my side.” Metis growls. “I wanted the perfect child, not a defect such as yourself. Perhaps I should have just stuck with robots.”
That can’t just be the phantom.
Athena’s always known her mother wasn’t fully emotionally available, but the way she says it, she can’t shake off that’s the truth. She shakes in place, and looks down to see the tar substance consuming her body.
“Help-”
“Why would I help you from what you did?” Metis shakes her head. “You can’t fix this.”
The tar consumes Athena, dragging her in rapid succession as she runs out of air and without anything else she can do, she howls for help, the last thing she sees is her mother’s dim, disappointed eyes.
She is jolted awake, her body raising from the bed as she screams, sobbing as tears fall from her face. She huddles herself in the blanket, trying to hold anything so she’s able to calm down. She resorts to one of Juniper’s stuffed animals, holding it close as she howls in its stomach.
Her partner raises her head, rubbing her eyes as she rubs Athena’s back, trying to calm her as she places Athena in her lap. Playing with her auburn hair, she reminds Athena to breathe, trying to calm her down.
“Hey,” Juniper’s soft voice echoes the room, tracing her thin fingers across Athena’s back. “It’s going to be okay.”
With that affirmation, Athena exhales, shaking her head as she burrows deep in the blanket, squeezing the stuffed animal. “My mother regretted having me…I don’t remember her voice anymore.”
“I really doubt that,” Juniper plays with Athena’s hair. “I really do.”
“About her voice?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. No, not that. I know you’re scared about the voice, but I forget what my mother’s voice sounds like and I saw her yesterday.” Juniper smiles when she hears a soft chuckle coming from Athena. “I meant I doubt your mother regretted having you. Your mother always came across to me as someone who would have put you through adoption if she hadn’t wanted you.”
“I...was a burden.”
“If you were a burden to her, my argument that she would have put you through adoption still stands.” Juniper hums, hearing Athena’s breathing steady to something familiar and steady. “I know you had your struggles, but your mother did whatever she could to make you happy. No parent that regretted having a child would go through all that effort to keep you stable and functioning.”
“You think so?”
“I know so. A lot of parents, even if they did want their children, would not have done half as much as your mother did. How many parents would go out of their way to use research funds to dedicate their life to make sure their child lived a happy life?”
“I wouldn’t know,” Athena deflates, her tears drying as Juniper kisses her forehead.
“Not a lot.” Juniper shakes her head. “When I was at Themis, I would hear how neglectful parents were. It was surreal. Most parents really didn’t care about their children or their well being. They just cared about results. There was a story Robin told me about the top of the prosecution’s class mm...I believe it was seven years ago.”
“Oh! You mean Klavier Gavin?”
“Huh? No, he didn’t graduate from there. His name was Sebastian Debeste. Like you, he had autism. However, he never really had the right environment to flourish. His father threw him to the wolves, so to speak. He was for a lack of term...a slow learner. He needed a figure that could explain things thoroughly and no one bothered to take the time with him.” Juniper looks down, “He was still top of the class, and even with that, he failed all the exams. Still top of the class, he thought he was unstoppable. It turned out his father rigged the grades. It took a while, but he’s a prosecutor now, though...”
“He’s not very good at it, huh?”
“Oh, he’s fine now. I'm surprised you haven't gone against him, actually. He just really struggled for years. Prosecutor Von Karma took him in and helped him get back on the right track. However, what I meant to go with that is that this isn’t an uncommon situation, apparently. I must have rambled on due to sleepiness. A lot of parents who don’t know what to do just throw their kids to the wolves, hoping they’ll adjust. Most of the time, they don’t.”
“That’s really sad to hear.” Athena pouts. “Wow, now I just feel like an ass.”
“You’re not, though. You’re the most considerate person I know. I remember your mom being standoffish when I tried to invite her to my tea parties. She was nice, though. I know your memories from that time are blurry, so I think it’s not unreasonable that her behavior came off as uncaring.” Juniper explains, “As awkward as she may have been, she made sure you were able to be taken care of in adulthood.”
“Yeah, that does make sense, Junie.” Athena yawns. “You ever think I’ll remember her voice again?”
“I don’t know. As I said, I’m not very good at remembering voices.” Juniper frowns. “We can call Simon tomorrow. Maybe he’ll know something.”
“Yeah, maybe. I...got a trial tomorrow. I need to get some more rest. If...I can fall asleep again.” Athena exhales. “Thanks, Junie.”
“You’re welcome. If you have another nightmare, I’ll console you, okay? No one should grieve alone.”