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Sean stepped into the trailer and came face to face with himself in one of the mirrors. He couldn't be more red if he held his breath for an hour.
"Bloody hell," he moaned, putting the small gift box he was carrying down on the closest chair then carding his fingers through his hair. "What the fuck am I doing?"
He sighed and stepped into the bathroom, splashed some cold water on his face then stared his reflection down. This was perhaps the single most ridiculous thing he had ever done but he was determined to see it through.
Orlando was entering the trailer as Sean stepped back into the room. Sean nodded in greeting then looked out the window, wondering how long he'd have to wait.
"Ooh, a present." Sean spun around just as Orlando was tearing through the wrapping paper, the ribbon fluttering to the floor.
"That's not yours!" he shouted, the sound reverberating in the small space.
"Sorry mate, but it was on my chair, no card."
Sean took the box from Orlando, turned it in his hands to see all his careful work shredded from top to bottom.
Orlando looked at him quizzically. "Who's it for?"
Sean continued to examine the now torn paper. "It's not for anyone, really. Didn't mean to shout."
"Hey, I am sorry. Maybe I can help fix it."
Sean glanced at him quickly before flashing a small smile and walking toward the door. "It's nothing important. See you tomorrow."
He could feel the heat rising in his face as he walked to the car park, for some reason taking the long way round almost as if he didn't want anyone to see him. He slammed the door shut and tossed the box onto the passenger seat feeling more and more foolish with each passing minute. He cringed, thinking about all the time he'd spent on this already. Hours over a barely touched meal with Bernard trying to decide what to buy. An unknown amount of time in his hotel room wrapping and re-wrapping the gift, the discarded paper in the bin probably representing a whole forest of dead trees. And now this sinking feeling that it had all been for naught just because it wasn't perfect and pristine.
"For fuck's sake, I'm turning into an over-sentimental ..." he started before jumping at a loud knock on the driver's side window. Viggo's lopsided smile greeted him.
"Weren't we supposed to have dinner?" Viggo asked as Sean rolled down the window.
"Yeah, I was just ... waiting."
"We were meeting at the trailer."
"Yeah." Sean couldn't think of anything to say. He'd managed to build this evening up into something it was never meant to be, something it shouldn't be, and now he felt completely self-conscious and uncomfortable; all he could do was stare at the steering wheel searching for a simple, casual explanation for his behavior. The passenger door opened and for the second time in minutes Sean startled. He watched as Viggo picked up the gift and sat down next to him, one leg still outside the door.
"Aren't you going to finish opening it?" Viggo asked, offering the box to Sean.
"It's not mine." Sean's eyes stayed firmly fixed to the dashboard.
"Oh." Viggo gave the box a quick shake next to his ear. "Well I can help with the wrapping if you tell me who it's for."
"Fuck!" It was Viggo's turn to jump as Sean slammed his hand onto the steering wheel.
"It's for you. Orlando accidentally started opening it back at the trailer, and I'm being a tosser about the evening not going as planned." Sean finally looked Viggo in the eyes. "Look, I think we should call it a night, ok? Have dinner some other time when I'm not camped out in idiotland."
Viggo didn't speak, just held Sean's gaze as if he was searching for something. And Sean wouldn't look away, refused to show any more weakness or embarrassment than he feared he already had. Finally, after what seemed like several long and excruciating minutes, Viggo finally slid completely into the car and shut the door.
"This is meant to be special?" he asked, gesturing with the box. "Meaningful?"
When Sean nodded Viggo smiled, not wild or patient or patronizing, but the smile of someone who'd finally found shelter after spending hours in the cold. He handed the gift to Sean.
"Re-wrap it and give it to me another time. Tonight we eat. And talk. And you give me the gift of what's locked up in that brain of yours. Deal?"
Sean still felt clumsy and a little off-balance, but he nodded and returned the smile. "Just as long as it's an equal exchange."
"You got it."
The drive was mostly silent but by the time they reached the restaurant Sean finally felt at ease. He slid the gift into the glove box and got out of the car.
"Give me a hint?" Viggo asked as they walked toward the entrance.
"About what I bought you?"
"Yeah."
Sean stroked his chin as if deep in thought. "Right, well, it's smaller than a breadbox."
"Uh huh."
"It's not alive."
"Ok, I get it. No hints. Promise not to keep me waiting too long?"
Sean paused and looked at Viggo. "I promise. No more waiting."