Archive of Our Own

"You want to do what?"

"He wants to play wife swap."

"That's not what I-" Jisung hits the table, frowning. "None of you read the stuff I've sent you!"

"I've read it, hyung, I just don't know what it has to do with us," Seungmin retorts from opposite him.

"Jisung thinks that he's got us all figured out," Minha chimes in, playing with her hair while looking completely uninterested in the conversation.

"And how do you know that?" Hyunjin asks sharply, just for Minha to raise her eyebrows at her.

"We text."

"With my husband."

"Yeah, just like you and Seungmin do."

Startled, Hyunjin's head snaps in Seungmin's direction, who just sighs and rubs at his face, like he's not even surprised by Minha knowing everything. "She's impossible to keep secrets from."

Minha gives the lock of hair she's been toying with a little smug smile, but she still pretends like the conversation doesn't concern her. Jisung heaves a sigh of his own - this isn't going anything like he was hoping it would.

"Look, guys-" Minha throws him a dirty look at the casual way he addressed them, but he ignores her. "I just think this is something that could benefit all of us. We clearly get along well-"

" Too well," Hyunjin interjects wryly, and Jisung frowns.

"Why is me getting along well with Minha a problem and you getting along with Seungmin isn't?"

Seungmin raises his eyebrows at him. "Are you sure that's all you're doing?"

"Seungmin, you and Hyunjin have gone on dates while she told me she got caught up at work. I saw you while I was at the park with Channie - we both know I did. Me and Minha haven't done anything you two haven't done already. I haven't even kissed her yet."

"Yet," Hyunjin repeats, looking disgusted.

With a sudden, unexpected huff, Minha throws the lock of hair she was holding over her shoulder and turns to face her husband, her cheek propped up on her fist and a saccharine smile on her face. "Have you kissed Hyunjin, honey?" She asks like she's asking for a piece of juicy gossip and not asking her husband if he cheated on her.

"No!" Seungmin replies while sounding completely offended. "I would never do that to you!"

"Never or not yet?"

Jisung buries his face in his palms. "This isn't going anywhere productive."

"You think?" Hyunjin snaps, sat back in her chair looking extremely upset - usually Jisung would try to grovel a little to get her to calm down, but he's just tired of this constant back-and-forth and pretending they don't all know what he's figured out after their last family get-together.

"You're not really helping that, baby," he retorts and shakes his head. "Look. I love you and I love Minha. I'm not the first or the last person to feel that way. I don't even think I'm the only person at this table who feels that way." He gives a meaningful look to Minha, who rolls her eyes, then tries to look at Seungmin and Hyunjin, but both his brother and his wife avoid his eyes. "I just think that if we're open about that, if we're willing to talk about it, then this doesn't need to be a problem. We don't have to fight, and nobody has to ruin themselves financially by getting divorced, or have that affect the kids. Hell, even Mom and Dad don't need to know."

Seungmin scoffs. "You think Channie or Changbin wouldn't tell their grandparents that their sons switched wives for a week?"

"We can bribe Changbin into keeping his mouth shut," Minha offers. "I've done it before - he never told anyone who actually broke that fancy bowl at grandmother's house."

"That was you?" Seungmin's jaw drops, but Minha just grins at him.

"Maybe wouldn't even have to hide it from them," Jisung says tentatively, scratching at the back of his head. "They're both pretty open-minded, right? Maybe they wouldn't even care."

"You don't think Mom wouldn't scold us all the way to Sunday if she found out?"

"Scold us, maybe - but not disown us ."

Seungmin gives him a stony look. "Are you really willing to risk that?"

Jisung bites his lip. "Maybe not right away... but if this actually works..."

"What is this again?" Hyunjin steps in again, leaning forward into the conversation this time with her brows furrowed. "What exactly is your plan, Jisung?"

"Well, I..." Jisung lays his forearms on the table, plays with his own fingers nervously. "I don't think that much would really have to change? Nothing between me and you would have to change, I just wouldn't have to talk to Minha behind your back anymore - we could go for dates, or she could come over to our place, and you and Seungmin could just... do whatever you want to do as well. We'd talk about what you're okay with us doing - and if you don't want me to kiss her, if you don't want what's between us to go any further, then that's alright with me."

Hyunjin blinks at him with wide eyes. "Seriously? You mean that?"

"Of course I do! I love you, Hyunjin - that hasn't changed since we got married. And if you and Seungmin are just friends, and you don't want me and Minha to be anything but friends too, then I'll do that - because I want to keep you. I want to keep being your husband - I'm in love with her, but I don't want to lose you."

"You're not just saying that because of the kids."

"I swear that's not it. You're still one of the most beautiful, funniest, most hardworking women I know - how could I ever stop loving you?"

Hyunjin reaches up to cover her face, but Jisung can see the blush before it's hidden behind her hand, and it makes him smile. "Shut up."

This time he reaches out to hold her waist, and she stiffens up like she always does but doesn't move away. "I mean it."

She laughs, clearly embarrassed, but when she peeks at him through her fingers, her look seems fond. "Stop it."

Jisung tilts his head with a smile. "Do you trust me?"

Hyunjin blushes even more and she pushes his face away, but doesn't try to squirm out of his hold. "Stop being cheesy."

He laughs against her hand and tries to kiss it just for her to jerk it away. "Yes or no."

"Yes!" She says it impatiently, but it's colored with a laugh, and when he smiles at her, she smiles back. "I guess you haven't really treated me any differently..." Hyunjin looks over at Minha, who meets her gaze head-on, looking equal parts passive and fearless. "Despite everything that's been going on between you two."

Jisung lets go of her waist in favor of holding her hand. "That's because nothing changed about how I feel about you." He hesitates then, briefly looking at Seungmin who is watching both of them carefully. "Has... anything changed in how you feel about me?"

Hyunjin pauses then, and gives Seungmin a long look which he returns. She doesn't say anything, and Jisung honestly starts bracing for the worst - it's not that he wasn't kind of expecting it, it's that he was really hoping that he was right, and he and Minha weren't the only ones capable of holding more than one lover in their hearts at a time. But that would be okay too, wouldn't it? If he and Minha could be there for each other while Seungmin and Hyunjin pursued whatever was happening between them... they could make that work as well. For the kids. And the sanity of all of them.

"It's okay," Seungmin says after a while, and Jisung lets his chin drop.

"Not... really..." Hyunjin admits then, tentatively, and Jisung's chin flies up as well as Minha's eyebrows. Seungmin just nods, and Hyunjin continues. "I didn't know how to feel - I didn't stop loving you? But between work and kids and me and Seungmin hitting it off so well... I thought maybe we had to be done."

Encouraged by the glimmer of hope, Jisung leans closer, squeezing her hand. "We don't have to let that get between us - we can make time for each other, we can have Changbin watch Channie sometimes and go on date nights, or ask my parents to watch the kids - Channie's going start school soon anyway. We can figure this out, if you're sure that you still have feelings for me."

Hyunjin looks troubled, and her eyes stray back to Seungmin. "I'm..."

To Jisung's surprise, Seungmin reaches for Hyunjin's other hand. "It's okay," he repeats. "He's your husband. It's okay if you still love him - I always knew I wasn't ever going to have you just for myself. I'm at peace with that."

There's something about the way Seungmin says it that kind of makes Jisung feel bad for his little brother - it sounds a little like him admitting that he was never expecting to have anything he didn't have to share with his older brother; and Jisung is sorry that that's something that he's barely managed to get with Minha, but on the other hand, he knows that their relationship issues weren't his fault. Stuff wasn't perfect between them even before he and Minha started talking behind their spouses' backs.

It isn't Jisung's job, at the end of the day, to reassure Seungmin that he in't just everyone's second choice, the little brother who only gets Jisung's hand-me-downs.

"Minha." She glares at him, and he sighs. "Noona."

He can tell that she's trying to play clueless, and as much as he loves her, her tendency to play ignorant when she didn't want to deal with things was a trait of hers he could do without. "What?"

"You need to tell him, too."

Minha clicks her tongue, then leans back into her seat and crosses both her arms and legs. Then she huffs and squares her shoulders. "He knows."

Jisung gives her an unimpressed look. "Does he?"

"Seungmin," she says sharply while still looking at Jisung and Seungmin almost snaps to attention at the sound of his own name in his wife's voice. Maybe Minha does have him trained as much as they joke about her having him. "Do you know I love you?"

"What?" Seungmin's face scrunches up in utter confusion.

"Just say you know I love you so Jisung will get off my back," Minha demands, and if it was anyone else, it would sound like a plea, but from her it just sounds like a command.

"You do?"

Minha looks at him like he's stupid and Jisung resists the urge to bash his head against the table. "Of course!"

Seungmin crosses his arms. "You haven't told me that since we decided to get divorced."

"I have - like twenty times!"

"When exactly was that," he narrows his eyes at his wife, and Minha rolls her eyes, mirroring his posture.

"In therapy."

"You mean when they made us say it?"

"That was the point, wasn't it? I said it, so now you know it and we can move on with our marriage."

"No, the point was that we should communicate better."

"We're communicating right now."

"You're arguing with me."

"It's a form of communication."

Multiple different expressions cross Seungmin's face in quick succession, and then he's standing up from the table. "We're done here."

Minha does nothing but blink at him in shock while he storms out of the kitchen they're sitting in, and Jisung takes it upon himself to follow his brother outside.

"Seungmin - Seungminnie." He only manages to catch up to him in the hallway, and he grabs his arm before he can bend down to grab his shoes. "Hold on."

Seungmin shakes his hand off of his arm and sighs deeply. "Jisung - look, I know you mean well. Your plan or whatever? It sounds good - if it'll make both Minha and Hyunjin happy, then I'll do it. You can have them both - but I need to be alone right now."

"Seungmin, you should really talk to Minha."

"Look, hyung, I don't know what she told you, if she did it to make you feel better or to make sure you wouldn't try to break your thing off, but it's a delicate balance we've got going, okay? All you're doing is making this harder for the both of us. We don't work like you and and Hyunjin do, and we never will." There's shuffling from the direction of the kitchen, and Seungmin quickly steps into his shoes. "Minha loves you, and that's great. She deserves someone to be happy with."

With a small, awkward smile, Seungmin disappears through the door just as Hyunjin appears in the doorway with Minha in tow.

"He left?" It's Minha who asks the question, though.

"He said he needed to be alone," Jisung admits, and rubs the back of his head. Hyunjin comes over to hug him, while Minha lingers by the door, looking awkward.

"I should go after him," she says once he and Hyunjin part and both of them look her way. For once, she seems unsure, shifting on her feet and pressing her lips together.

Unsure of how to proceed, Jisung takes a tentative step towards Minha, but he holds Hyunjin's eyes in a silent question - when she nods, he walks over and runs his hands down Minha's arms comfortingly, a little surprised when she willingly comes closer to hug him. She doesn't cry, just kind of rests against him, but the act of her seeking out comfort like this on her own seems like a huge deal on its own.

It's a little strange to hold her like this, in front of his wife, but at the same time, it feels right.

"You'll figure this out," he reassures her softly and pats her hair. "He's still in love with you, and if you just tell him what you told me..."

"I don't know if I can," she admits under her breath and Jisung realizes she doesn't want Hyunjin to hear. "I can't say all of that to his face."

He brings her closer and leans down to her ear, tries to make this as private as it can get right in front of Hyunjin. "I know you don't like spelling these things out; and maybe he doesn't, either - but he needs you to say this. He needs you to do this for him. Sometimes the way you show, not tell is by telling, not showing."

Minha snorts wetly into his shoulder. "That makes no sense."

"You know what I mean."

She steps away from him at that, and meets his eyes seriously. "You think that the only big, romantic gesture he needs from me is me telling him I'm in love with him?"

"I said tell him everything you told me," he insists, and she looks away.

"He won't even listen to me," she says to the wall next to them, with carefully neutral resignation in her voice.

Then Hyunjin speaks up from behind Jisung. "Are you actually still in love with him?"

Jisung expects Minha to get mad or bristle, but she just looks at Hyunjin directly and nods, cocking her chin like he's preparing herself for a confrontation.

All Hyunjin does, when Jisung turns her way as well, is nod back. "He does still love you, too. I don't know if you're aware of how hard the divorce was on him, before you figured out you couldn't even do it." Minha stiffens at that, but she still doesn't try to talk back. Hyunjin sighs. "If you really have something to tell him, I think I can make him listen."

Minha blinks, clearly surprised. "Are you sure?"

Hyunjin gives her a wry smile. "There's a lot of trust that builds up when you're sharing a secret with someone... I think we all know that."

"And you really want to help me and Seungmin improve our relationship?"

Jisung is somehow not surprised when Hyunjin doesn't even hesitate before nodding. Somehow, it makes him love her even more than he already did. "I love him. And I want him to be happy in every way he can - and he's made it pretty clear that you used to make him incredibly happy." She does hesitate then, brushes her hair behind her ear. "For whatever reason."

Minha just stares at her for a moment, mouth slightly open like there are words hanging just at the tip of her tongue but aren't coming out. He lays a hand on her shoulder and she glances at him before taking a deep breath.

"Okay," she says eventually, her voice at that stilted tone that tells Jisung she's trying hard to be composed. One part of him is proud of her, and the other knows that she would punch him if he said that out loud. "If you can get him to listen, I'm willing to talk to him."

"And you'll tell him everything?" Jisung asks, just in case.

Minha rolls her eyes and tosses her hair before crossing her arms, but she nods. "I'll tell him everything."

"Great," he claps his hands together, then looks between... his two lovers? That's a strange thought. "Now we just need to figure out where Seungmin went."

"He went to the park," both Hyunjin and Minha say at the same time, then stare at each other for a second. Jisung sees the blush creep onto their cheeks, and he covers his mouth quickly so they wouldn't see him smile and attack him.

Hyunjin recovers first and clears her throat, looking away awkwardly. "He goes there when he needs to think. I can drive us there."

"How about we all go? In case things go weird," Jisung offers, and when both of the women look at him it's clear that they both realize that he just doesn't want them to be awkwardly stuck in one car with each other now that they're already stuck in a strange situation between two brothers together.

"That's fine with me," Minha says and walks past him to get her shoes. Hyunjin and Jisung exchange glances over her back, and Hyunjin shrugs.

Seungmin doesn't notice her until she stands right next to him, and he jumps when Hyunjin leans on the railing of the bridge next to him. It makes her laugh, and Seungmin feels the vice that has been clamping down on his chest for over an hour now loosen a little. He's always loved Hyunjin's laugh - but he can't remember if he has ever told her that. The thought makes a bitter taste settle in his mouth - saying things like that is important; he knows that - telling the people you love you love them, what you love about them, is so incredibly important.

"You look beautiful when you laugh."

It makes her pause, and her eyes look beautiful too when they stare at him, just as startled as he was by her approach. He wants to kiss her, but he doesn't know if he's allowed - if that would be breaking Jisung's trust somehow, so he reaches out for her hand instead, and she chews on her own mouth while he tangles their fingers together.

"I'm okay, if that's what you came to find out." Hyunjin huffs, and he chuckles. "Did they send you?"

She pouts. "We came to an agreement together."

"Right," he squeezes her fingers and looks out into the garden again. "You can tell them I'm okay. Not jumping into the Han river just yet just because my wife doesn't love me." He sighs and rubs at his eyes with his free hand. "I've had way too much time to accept that to be bothered by it now."

He says that, but he was the one who couldn't take the reality of it back there. Something about having it thrown in his face again in front of the other woman that he loved more than himself, in front of his brother who somehow managed to have them both love him too... it just hurt more than usual. Seeing Minha sit there indirectly asking for his blessing to be with his brother, then struggling to even pretend she's still in love with him...

It hasn't felt like that since therapy, which ended in a disaster of a success, where they figured out that they could work together , just not love each other right .

Hyunjin leans against his shoulder, and it's a small comfort when faced with the hollow in his chest, but it's a comfort nonetheless. "Did you really give up on her completely?"

No; never will, probably - he's just that kind of a hope-filled idiot. A romantic, some would say. "I don't know. Sometimes I do almost think she still wants me around."

He can feel her thumb running over the back of his hand soothingly, and he lets his shoulders loosen in response. He just feels tired.

"Jisung seems to think she loves you," Hyunjin says carefully, and Seungmin fights not to stiffen up again.

"Jisung hasn't been married to her for two years now." He's not able to keep the curtness out of his voice completely, though.

Hyunjin sighs and rubs her cheek against his shirt. "Would you believe it out of her own mouth?"

Seungmin snorts and shakes his head with a dry laugh. "I don't think even Jisung can make her say it and sound like she means it."

"That's not what I asked," Hyunjin pouts at him again, and he holds her face while he places a brief kiss on her forehead.

"I'm tired of playing what ifs when it comes to her," he says quietly, and looks out into the garden again.

"Let me word it differently, then," Hyunjin says, her voice so serious Seungmin looks at her again when she straightens up. "If I asked you to hear her out, and to try to believe her, would you do that for me?"

"What?"

She sighs. "You heard me."

"Yeah, but I don't understand why you're trying to advocate for her."

Hyunjin gives him a stern look. "Because I know you love her, and I really think you two still have a chance."

He shakes his head. "You don't know that."

"I'm just asking you to listen to her."

Seungmin squints at her, but she seems relentless, so he sighs and shrugs eventually. "Okay, sure. If she has something to say, I'll listen."

"You promise?"

"I promise," he repeats while rolling his eyes. It seems like a pointless promise to make - an empty one; he wasn't worth an honest talk to Minha - she barely spoke to him while they were paying for a safe space to talk in.

"Then wait here." With those words, Hyunjin kisses his cheek, squeezes his hand and walks away, leaving him staring after her, frozen in his spot and unable to speak.

Really - did they plan a whole ambush on him? Is this what this was all about?

His fear is confirmed when Minha walks from behind the same bush Hyunjin walked towards just moments prior, pointedly not looking his way even as she comes right up to him. She looks probably the most unsure Seungmin has ever seen her in their entire relationship, and that catches him off-guard. He wants to be standoffish, to not let her discomfort get to him, but all he wants is to wrap his arms around her and comfort her.

Instead, he reaches out to lift the braid she has thrown over her shoulder, choosing to look at it instead of at her face. Her eyes are focused somewhere behind him; it's like it's a blind date, and not a meeting between spouses.

"You don't usually braid your hair like this." He knows her with ponytails, buns or loose hair he can bury his face into while he hugs her, but this style is new.

"Hyunjin braided it for me in the car," Minha explains, and she sounds surprisingly meek; it's almost unnatural on her, especially in circumstances like these. "I think she thought it would make me less nervous."

"Are you nervous?" Even as he says it, he realizes it's the wrong question to ask - and the way she presses her lips together afterwards confirms it.

"Of course I am; you're going to scrutinize every single thing I say to figure out if I'm lying," there's venom in her voice, but hurt in her eyes when she looks at him. "It's a little stressful."

Seungmin wants to deny it, but he knows she hates being lied to, so he doesn't try. Instead he drops her braid and offers her his hand. "Come sit down with me?"

It makes Minha roll her eyes, but she does take his hand, and follows him to a bench, where she pulls his hand into her own lap. The act surprises him, but she does it with that same kind of stubborn determination she does everything people don't expect her to do with, and it's endearing in a way that threatens to make him smile despite the situation they're in.

"Hyunjin said you had something to tell me."

"Right." She sounds a little choked, and clears her throat before speaking up again. "I..." She purses her lips, tilts her head and tries again, this time looking into his eyes with a serious expression. "If this sounds absolutely insane, blame Jisung, okay? He made me promise to say all of this."

Seungmin frowns. "Did he feed you lines to say?"

"No!" Minha looks at him like he's an idiot - one of her favorite ways of regarding him, really. "I just overshared to him one night over text - after a lot of rice wine - and he's kept saying you need to hear the whole spiel yourself ever since."

He feels his own eyebrows lifting. "Was it that impressive?"

She looks uncomfortable, and when she looks away, her ears are pink and her small fingers are massaging Seungmin's hand almost painfully. "I was really drunk."

He laughs, and when she glares at him, he finds the courage to just keep smiling at her. "Let's hear it, then."

With a little nod, Minha seems to gather her strength, and when she closes his eyes for a bit, he tries not to hold the fact that she can't look at him while saying it against her. For Hyunjin. And for the part of him that still loves Minha more than what's probably good for him.

"I... love you, Seungmin. I loved you when I married you, I loved you when I was going to divorce you, and I love you now."

He blinks at her, confused. "So why-"

She shushes him sharply, and when he gives her an unimpressed look she glares at him until he mimes zipping up his lips.

"We're not like other couples, right? We're not like Jisung and Hyunjin." Seungmin hears his own assertion to Jisung in her words, and when he sees how imploringly she's looking at him, he nods, and that seems to relax her a little. "We're not that affectionate, or lovey-dovey. And I never wanted us to be - I like arguing with you. You challenge me, and I like that - it's different with Jisung; he makes everything..." She bites her lip and looks away, and Seungmin tries not to put any words in her mouth in the silence. He'll listen. He'll trust her; he owes her that. "It's easy with him. And I guess I missed that, after having been with you for so long. When I'm with him, I don't need to tell him how I feel - he gets me. It's addicting; and I kept getting frustrated, because it's never been like that with you, and I know now that it's never going to be."

The words freeze his blood in his veins, and like she can tell how he feels, Minha threads their fingers together and squeezes his hand tight.

"You're not Jisung - but Jisung is not you, either. He's comfortable, but I don't like just being comfortable. The reason I fell in love with you is still the reason I'm in love with you. You're the most frustrating, second smartest person in every room," the assertion makes him smile, and his heart skips a beat when his wife smiles back. "And you can take me on like nobody else can; but you still try to take care of me; you do things for me, and you treat me like an equal, and you're not afraid of me." She looks into her lap, at their joined hands, tilts them this way and that. "I probably said more, but I don't remember those texts word for word." Seungmin snorts and she smirks without lifting her head. "I remember saying I still love you, and that I don't know if we can ever show each other we love each other again; since Jisung made me feel like it could go without saying, but 'without saying' clearly wasn't working for us."

"That's why he wanted you to talk to me."

Minha shrugs. "He thought we needed to fix us before we tried to implement his 'masterplan'."

Seungmin scoffs. "Does he call it that?"

"I call it that," she looks up at him with a devious smile. "He hates it when I call it that."

He laughs, and her smile widens a little, showing her teeth, and Seungmin is suddenly overcome with fondness for her. He touches her braid again with his free hand, and when her smile falls a little as the gesture confuses her a little, he leans forward to kiss her. Almost to his surprise, she holds him close by the neck and kisses back. It's a gentle kiss, but it's probably the longest one they've shared in a while. He nudges her nose with his once they pull away, and he can tell she's smiling again despite her narrowed eyes.

"You're on thin ice right now," she says, but it's playful, and when he goes back in to kiss her harder, she wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him as close as he can get.

Minha and Seungmin walk up to the park entrance arm in arm, and Seungmin makes an exaggerated gagging noise at the sight of his older brother making out with his wife against the door of their car that makes his wife giggle.

Jisung pulls way from the kiss to make a face at him, and Hyunjin just sighs at them, although she does smile when she sees Minha's arm threaded through Seungmin's, and the two women exchange small nods.

"We need to set some ground rules," Seungmin announces, and then there are three pairs of eyes on him, two fond and one annoyed (but maybe just a little amused), and it... feels like a new, strange feeling. To have everything out in the open; deliberately, this time. "Nobody's kissing Jisung in front of me."

Jisung's face scrunches like he just bit into a lemon. "Well, nobody's kissing you , either."

"Fair," Seungmin nods, but then Minha tugs at his arm.

"Do we get a say?"

He blinks at her, because she's not the type to kiss in public, never has been, but something tells him that she's not entirely joking. "Honey, he's my brother."

Minha pouts at him, and he knows that she's faking being upset, but he's endeared nonetheless. "So you're saying I can't kiss you whenever I want?"

It's words he never even imagined her saying, and it leaves his mouth slightly agape as he stares at her. She laughs at his expression, then untangles their arms so she can pull him down for a kiss. While he's still reeling from all of that, she walks over to Jisung and Hyunjin, drops a kiss on Jisung's cheek and then smiles at Hyunjin, who's still being held by the waist by her husband, and takes her hand, tugging at it.

"Let's go pick up your kids from the grandparents now - they're probably sick of dealing with Changbin by now."

It makes Hyunjin laugh, and she nods, the two of then abandoning their husbands in favor of climbing into the back of the car together. Jisung looks after them with a mildly shocked expression of his own, and once Seungmin recovers, he finds himself smiling at it, too.

"This was your idea," he reminds him, and pats his shoulder in sympathy before following their wives to the car.

Before Jisung gets in with him, Seungmin hears the telltale sound of Jisung hitting his head against the car repeatedly - the inside of the car fills with his wife's laughter, and when he turns around in the passenger's seat to throw a smile towards the back, he gets two beautiful smiles in return.