Work Text:
The clock on the wall across from Miller’s bunk read seven o’clock in the morning and he still hadn't slept. He was the only one up and the silence soothed him. Being trapped in the metal bunker meant there was little solitude; most escaped to dreams to keep the nightmare they would wake up into at bay.
Miller knew that the situation for the forty-eight “sky people” trapped in Mt. Weather was dire. The people living in the mountain were desperate and willing to do anything to save themselves – even kill children. With no promise of rescue, a bunch of delinquents had to come up with their own plan and learn to lead themselves.
Miller was accostumed to turning to Bellamy and even Clarke for leadership in the 100’s camp; but in Mt. Weather they were only half of the original 100 and were without both of their leaders for guidance. Miller has found himself leaning on Monty, Jasper and even Maya to find a way out of this hellhole.
Monty. Miller didn't expect it, the feelings he found he had for the other young man. Miller didn’t know Monty on the Ark and when he came down to Earth; while he knew of the other boy’s existence they weren’t close. Miller found himself chiefly loyal to Bellamy and Monty to Clarke. This isn’t to say that Miller has ever disliked Monty but he wasn’t on his radar before this. Before this he had different worries and spent his days with different people.
Sealed in this metal cage, Miller spent a lot of time with the shorter boy; he found that Monty was the only good thing about the god-forsaken place. Monty shared Miller’s dry sense of humor and his calming and generally happy disposition kept Miller under control more than once. When Monty sees his friend starting to pace with anger and helplessness, he finds something to distract him. First it was cards but recently he’s found something else both boys enjoy more.
Kissing Monty is like nothing else in Miller’s life. On the Ark, while homosexuality wasn’t explicitly forbidden, people looked down upon it. Miller figured out he was gay when he was thirteen but was naturally a quiet youth and kept it to himself. As Miller got older he found he was eager to experiment but also realized he couldn’t experiment with the people he wanted to. While girls were pretty and fun to play handball with, he just couldn’t muster any feelings other than friendship for them.
As any brochure would tell you, suppressing feelings led to destructive behavior. The unfairness of it all plagued Miller and made him angry. To get back at the adults who made his life like this, Miller stole from them. He started out taking money from his dad who once kicked a man off the guard because he found out he was living with another man. His father’s superiors all looked the other way.
Miller moved on to stealing food from shops, then clothes from other residents and even a small knife from a guard. His biggest steal, and the one that landed him in a cell, was a whole chess set from Wells Jaha.
Monty was the first person he found who understood him and what it had been like to hide that part of him for so long. Monty’s soothing presence had quelled a lot of Miller’s anger. Monty’s kisses took Miller’s mind off the situation they were in.
Their first kiss was a memory Miller thinks of when he starts feeling the walls of their metal prison close in on him. Everyone had gone down for dinner but Miller found he couldn’t face this captors. Monty saw the distress on his friend’s face and stayed back; he tried everything to get the taller boy to calm down. Finally, he closed the gap between him and Miller and tentatively placed his hands on Miller’s rough cheeks.
“Nate, we’re going to get out of here, even if I have to drag you all out of here myself. I will. I will get you out of here.” The sincerity in the other boy’s eyes made it impossible for Miller to look away. Monty’s words and warm touch caused all the tension to leak from Miller’s body and before he could stop himself Miller was leaning closer to this brilliant boy.
When their lips touched Miller could no longer form a coherent thought. His brain was spinning and his body was all too aware of Monty’s soft lips and his hard, lean body pressed against Miller’s own. Miller’s hands moved with unusual shyness under Monty’s shirt as he pressed the older boy back against the wall. Monty pulled away for a second but the grin he saw reflected back at him had them crashing back together with a new passion. They kissed hungrily and Miller felt all the lines of his body press against Monty’s causing his pulse speed up.
Lost in each other, they almost missed the sound of a door opening signaling dinner was over and the rest of the forty-eight were back. The boys pulled a part quickly and looked as guiltless as possible as their fellow prisoners filed in. Either everyone was respecting the pair’s privacy or they all just had too much on their minds because no one commented on the boys’ red faces and rumpled clothing.
After that the two found every opportunity they could to have some privacy. They became more comfortable around each other and more familiar with each other. Miller opened up to Monty about his father, his sexuality, his hopes and fears. Monty too confided in Miller, things he admitted, he has never even told Jasper.
There were no labels and no spoken promises but Miller trusted Monty more than he’d ever trusted anyone in his life. Monty too found something in Miller he had never experienced with another before. Jasper was his best friend but this was different.
While the mountain men had them locked up in an airtight prison, danger cloaked in good intentions lurked around every corner. Miller knew that he had to contain what he felt for Monty for a different reason than the ones that kept him quiet on the Ark. Love, while tried and true, had no place where death was constant.
The sounds of rustling and creaking beds broke Miller from his thoughts and with one glance as Monty’s sleeping form; he was pushing himself out of bed as well. While he couldn’t be with Monty just yet, he would do all he could to protect him.