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She thought the world of her. Sara was so fascinating, someone who did everything right every time. Her delicate figure laiden with heavy battle gear, it was an image constantly emblazoned on Baal’s mind. Not a single opinion mattered to her, as long as Sara knew how deeply Baal respected her.
Surely people would also be flattered that the Raiden Shogun thought so highly of them. Baal recalled passing Sara’s vision to her, their hands had brushed together and an electric current stronger than anything Baal had created rushed through her body. It was amazing. Sara has proven her loyalty over and over again. Fighting people on her behalf, agreeing with her decree. Though many were afraid to challenge her, there was something admirable about Sara. She pushed back if something was amiss. Baal found herself constantly taking the woman’s opinion into consideration. Of course, Baal always had the final say. She was the eternal, she would be the eternal. Forever. That was the definition of eternal, was it not?
What she wouldn’t give to have Sara by her side for an eternity. She wished desperately to have Sara there. Baal refused to continue her hunt for eternity without Sara by her side. She couldn’t tell the other that though, Sara would continue to work herself to death. Baal wanted to encourage her to take breaks, slowly coaxing the other woman to take time off of her strenuous work. Sara never listened though, unless Baal commanded it. Their hearts were truly one in Baal’s mind, even if neither of them had ever said it aloud. Why would they speak of their affections? Baal feared what her people would think of her. Compared to her they were powerless, but that did little to calm her fears. There wasn’t anything that her followers could do, but losing their respect was overwhelming. A fear that played on the cords in the back of her mind. She couldn’t do that. It wouldn’t ever be fair to Sara. The life of an archon was one that had to be alone, and while Baal’s heart ached to confess. She hadn’t. And she wouldn’t.
The only selfish desire Baal allowed herself to express was that of her eternity. At least to Sara. What was so wrong about wanting to exist forever? Some may have seen the pitfalls of living forever as losing everything. Never being able to enjoy something because you know it would end and life would progress as usual. People would go and you couldn’t cling to them, they would outgrow you and die and there you would be, still alive. How boring… Baal wanted to see everything, experience everything. If she died, if she ceased to exist, she lost. She couldn’t handle losing in any capacity. Those who beat her were simply lying to themselves, she was eternal. She would have the final say.
Sometimes, on late nights when Baal couldn’t sleep, she would talk with Sara. The two shared hushed whispers in the chambers of the Raiden Shogun. One particular night was still replaying over and over for her. Sara’s question.
“Why did you bother granting me a vision?”
There were so many reasons. She couldn’t make a list long enough. While Baal believed in divinity, she wondered if Sara felt the same. Sara wouldn’t answer honestly she feared, she didn’t see a point in asking her when Sara would lie to her. She didn’t think less of Sara for that, she understood. Baal wouldn’t be able to tell herself no either.
“Kujou Sara, you were made to assist me. To save Inazuma. We can work hand in hand. We will make everything perfect again. Eternally.”
Sara understood Baal in a way no mortal had. She understood everything. Her smallest desires were all taken note of by her right hand man. When Baal fidgeted with her hair, Sara would braid it back for her. When her eyes wandered a bit too long, she would question if she needed a change of scenery. Sara was the reason Baal had allowed herself to slip away from Inazuma. To see the world. Baal wasn’t some foolish idiot with a vision who couldn’t be trusted to leave her beloved land. She observed the goods and wares of every nation in Teyvat. Sara had convinced her that it was okay to explore.
They had shared everything. Pancakes in Mondstadt, bamboo shoot soup in Liyue. Sara’s fascination with the other nations was endearing. Baal had pushed aside the fear that lingered in her heart. What if Sara preferred them to Inazuma? She couldn’t leave! What would she do without the only person who understood her?
There had been no reason to worry though, when they returned to Inazuma, wearing the clothes of commoners and their hair in foreign styles, Sara couldn’t stop talking about how excited she was to eat food from Inazuma.
It had been Baal who prepared the food. A feat of everything that reminded herself and Sara of home. Crab roe kourayaki, egg rolls, sakura tempura, even the ramen Baal usually deemed too hearty for herself to eat. Sara sat across from her, smiling just slightly as she began to eat from the plates stacked before them both.
”You’re a wonderful chef, you know.” Baal could still remember how proud she felt when Sara said it. Her heart swelled in her chest.
”I know.” Oh how she longed to be humble, as Sara was. But that was why they fit together so well. Sara knew Baal, and accepted her vain moments along with her kind ones. ”I’m glad you’re enjoying it Sara.”
Sara’s name sounded so nice coming from Baal’s lips. She liked saying the other woman’s name, it was like waxing poetic. There was something so beautiful about Sara. Something that Baal couldn’t properly articulate without coming off as some poor fool who was hopelessly in love with her right hand man. She would not be called a fool.
Those memories were sweet, stimulating her mind, exciting her and making her want to make more with Sara. After all, her time was running out. How long could they keep this up? Sara wouldn’t live forever she feared. Though, she had heard whispers of an alchemist in Mondstadt. Selfishly, Baal wanted him in Inazuma. For him to figure out how she could make Sara last for an eternity. Just as she would. Otherwise, Baal worried she herself may not make it through eternity. Cutting her own eternal run short, to be with the one she loved.