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Lan Xichen held him tightly to himself, then leaned in, placing a tender kiss on his lips while caressing his neck with his fingertips.
"Wanyin, can you hear me? I want to dance!"
Jiang Cheng shook himself out of his reverie, clenching his teeth.
They were at his sister's wedding with Jin Zixuan, which he had to attend with the Anping Rong CEO’s daughter.
"Then go with someone else, Rong Yan" he said, clearly annoyed, but he sensed his grandmother's gaze, who was just like his late mother and preferred not to tease her.
He silently took the girl's hand, with which he headed for the dance floor. They looked good, he could see everyone looking at them, whispering about the new wedding they were planning, but he wasn't going to let that happen. He loved someone else.
Grey eyes found a figure in a dark blue shirt adorned with cloud-shaped cufflinks as they danced. So he wore them after all... A slight smile appeared at the corner of Jiang Wanyin's mouth as he remembered giving them to Lan Huan.
"You should be looking at me," he heard the girl's voice say, and he realized that the song had changed to one of those annoyingly slow, romantic ones. He didn't like those, he felt like throwing something at the speaker every time.
Unfortunately now all he could do was, keeping a slightly stiff posture, let Rong Yan rest her head against his chest, trying not to think about how much he disliked it. He also couldn't help the thoughts that were running away to the one he loved.
The clips he received meant that he reciprocated the feelings. He knew that. There were many moments they stole together, hiding from their families. It wasn't that they were afraid of disapproval, but they couldn't find the right time to reveal their relationship.
Now Jiang Cheng felt it was too late. Grandma Yu was trying to get engaged him to Rong Yan and Lan Xichen was tying himself tighter into a deal with the groom's brother Jin Guangyao. The bride and groom. Grey's irises found them, kissing tenderly in the middle of the dance floor.
He saw Jin Zixuan slide his thumb tenderly across the bride's cheek, and Jiang Cheng couldn't help but feel jealous.
Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor?
Jiang Wanyin's eyes fled to Lan Huan, colliding with his brown warm gaze, full of dark golden specks.
He didn't need to stand beside him to remember what they looked like, how shone when the man was happy, how darkened with desire. He knew him by heart.
"We fit together perfectly," the girl's voice reached the ears of Jiang Cheng, who still couldn't look away from his beloved.
Yes, they fit together perfectly, but not with the girl. Why did he have to dance with her? Why was he allowing her to rest her head against his chest? He closed his eyelids, remembering all the moments when he'd been the one with his head on Lan Xichen's chest similarly.
All the stolen mornings when they had escaped boring banquets to spend the night together in someone's flat, or hotel room. The mornings when they woke up cuddled, happy. He was always awakened by Lan Huan's fingers sliding between his hair.
Now Jiang Cheng was looking at his beloved, feeling like something was dying inside him. He was so close, within reach, and yet unreachable. It would have been enough for him to walk up to him and give him a hug, or grab his arm. Instead, he was stuck on the dance floor.
Jiang Wanyin moved slowly to the beat of the song, losing himself in his own memories. He could almost feel the other man's touch on him, the way he moved his fingers over him, the way he kissed his body, focusing on his earlobe, and his neck right behind it.
They had no problem meeting in the city, catching hands in the street, so why couldn't they dance together? Why couldn't they kiss in front of everyone, show that they belonged together? He knew why. Family expectations.
What Jiang Cheng didn't know was that a similar ache in his chest accompanied Lan Xichen as he stood in the company of Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue, discussing the arrangement that would bring their companies' common interests together.
He knew that everyone was aware of his orientation, which led Jin Guangshan to try to get him engaged to Jin Guangyao.
However, he wanted someone else. He moved his fingertips, seemingly casually, over his cufflinks. Elegant, silver, in the shape of clouds.
A simple decoration, but it meant a lot to him. Just like the earcuff that Jiang Cheng was wearing.
He knew it was a conscious sign to him that they felt the same, wanted the same, and yet when he saw Rong Yan hugging Jiang Cheng he felt the bitterness of jealousy.
A childish desire to push her away from him.
Lan Huan saw out of the corner of his eye how Jin Zixuan was showing affection to his wife, kissing her temple, gazing lovingly at her.
Why can't we be like that?
"Er-ge, are you listening to me?"
Jin Guangyao looked intently towards the dance floor.
"Are you looking at the bride and groom...?" he asked, shifting his gaze across the next guests when he didn't see a reaction on the older man's face.
"Or someone who's actually already been engaged?"
Lan Xichen failed to control the grimace of pain that flashed across his face.
"You guys are actually engaged too. What does your beloved say about it?"
To Lan Huan's relief came Nie Mingjue, who glared at Jin Guangyao making it clear that he should shut up.
Jiang Cheng could not hear what they were talking about. But he could see the slight blush on Lan Xichen's face, the gentle, genuine smile that sent to Nie Mingjue, and he couldn't help clenching his teeth tightly. He was never the first choice. What was he expecting?
"Wanyin? Are you okay?" the girl asked, looking at him carefully.
"Sorry, but despite the marriage plans floated by my grandmother, I will not marry you." He answered her stiffly, pushing Rong Yan away from him.
Jiang Cheng didn't wait for her reply. He only managed to send an apologetic glance to his sister, only to immediately quickly head towards the exit of the hall to the garden. He wanted to get away. As far away as possible. As long as he did not see the happiness of others.
He had someone he loved, but they were engaged to someone else. Even if he rebelled himself, he couldn't demand that from Lan Xichen. He could not expect from him to put his above the welfare of the family business.
He hadn't expected his beloved to almost run out of the room after him, grabbing his forearm, stopping him from removing his earcuff. A beautiful one with a combined cloud and lotus.
"Wanyin" gentle voice, tried to break through the wall that Jiang Cheng was violently erecting around his crippled heart. The man wanted to scream if it was really so bad that he had fallen in love with him, if they couldn't just be together.
He wanted to scream that their relationship, their love, that everything was hopeless, and he couldn't take it anymore. All the moments alone, which they stole like thieves, were not enough for him. He wanted it fully, every day.
He had never cried in front of others, but now tears of rage and helplessness came to his eyes as he finally noticed the gentle smile on Lan Huan's face as he held him tightly by the shoulders.
"A-Cheng…"
Lan Xichen held him tightly against him and then leaned in, placing a tender kiss on his lips while caressing his neck with his fingertips.
This time it wasn't a daydream.