Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

1925 

It's been a while hasn’t it? That sounds kind of stupid now that I’ve written it out. H ow long has it been? Since I left? 4 going on 5 years now. You're probably busy like you always are, I’m busy too.

Doing a lot of work out here, you really helped in the beginning when I first got here and I didn’t know anyone. You knew people. 

I’m not sure what made me want to write again after all this time, maybe because of how long it’s been or maybe to tell you the truth I’m more than a little bit lonely.

Who knew starting over and going your own way could be so damn lonely?

And it has been more than a while since I last heard from you, I know you take care of yourself like always Yongju but I wonder a little. I know you're probably just busy, but if you read this, maybe you could write back sometime? We could talk again, like before. I have a lot to tell you about, what it’s like working down here and everything. 

When you're quiet like this I worry sometimes, it isn’t like you. Maybe I’m becoming a worrier at my age…

“This is stupid.”

Daejin leans back in her chair and it takes all of her will power not to crush the letter within her fist and start over again.

She’s tried for a long time to get this letter right, but what do you even say to someone after five years of silence?

Did Yongju even want to be contacted? The Yongju that Daejin knew was nothing if not full of surprises, going head first into some new investigation.

Daejin turned over the old pamphlet, it was difficult to read in the dimming gleam of twilight. So she could just barely read the words, it was all old news.

None of it was really relevant anymore so it was as good as scrap paper. Laying around waiting for someone to write pointless letters on the back you didn’t know how to send.  

Yeah, Yongju was probably just really busy doing important stuff. Possibly overwhelmed with work out in the world. So excited and overwhelmed she forgot to write back.

Daejin crumbles the letter and throws it in the trash, takes another old pamphlet and pens another. 

Chapter Text

1925

Lying always came more easily to me than it did you. I don't like lying, of course. I remember how you said honesty is a precious and fragile thing. I was too naive and stupid to understood what you were saying then, I think I do now.

Maybe you were also naive, but you always seemed so put together. You could do anything and nothing could knock you down. 

I was strong, I had my fists. I thought those were all I had going for me. You had words and you told me they could be more powerful than bullets. Now I've fired more bullets than I can count, I can tell you, Yongju I like words better. 

There is fighting outside my window as I write. The contacts you gave me were good, they gave me a good start. I'm doing as well as anyone could be fighting. 

I've waited for you to send me a letter like you promised. I don't know if this one will get to you anyway but if it does, if this is worth the paper I'm printing it on. I want you to know you were one of the first people to believe in me and that meant more to me than you'll ever know. 

She entrusted the ill fated letter, tucking it securely in a pilfered envelope. Placing it carefully into the hands of a secret courier. Daejin was taking a risk. She did not know why. Maybe she was lonely, waiting for a response with cautious hope. 

Chapter Text

1925

It just keeps getting worse out here, Yongju. I can't see it getting any better either. But you know me, I don't ever back down from a fight even when it seems hopeless. 

I haven't been able to get any information about you from anyone. It's like you just vanished, but I'm sure there's a reason and I know you probably have it all figured out. I sound like Liza when I say it out loud but it makes me anxious to think about you all alone out there. I know you are used to working alone but you don't always have to be, Yongju.

Part of me worries you got caught up in something without understanding what you were doing. Maybe you stuck your nose somewhere and it went wrong this time. Or you forgot about me, I guess in the scheme of things we only knew each other for a little while. Or these times changed you just like they did me.

I didn't like to think about it that way. I was just so happy to see you again I didn't want to think about the ways we changed. Or that you weren't the same person who told me how much the truth mattered. If you read this I want you to know, don't let them sand you down. I still believe those things you told me even if no one else in this crazy world still does. 

Someone knocks on the door. The letter slips to the floor unfinished as Daejin in rushes outside. It will remain unfinished forever as it's author marches towards her early grave. She will never know she was writing to a ghost lost to history. She too will become a ghost.