Chapter Text
Jonah wakes up and gets out of bed, stretching a bit, ugh why did he choose a female host this time, the back pain is killer. His husband Peter has already left for work, he usually left early before Jonah woke up. Not Jonah, he corrects himself, Lydia, it wouldn't do to slip up and reveal himself at an event or in front of his kids. Which speaking of, they would be getting up soon, or he would wake them up, the last thing he needed was for them to be late to school. Gertrude would laugh at him, a member of the PTA, whose kids can't get to school on time. He scoffed thinking about the older woman, his rival, he hated her but couldn't deny that they did plan the best fundraisers when they were not at each other's throats over what food they should serve in the cafeteria (Gertrude believed in organic produce and the transformative power of veganism, Jonah laughed at her and said he didn't want his kids only eating carrots like rabbits). He got dressed, he would never admit it but he liked dresses to a certain extent, some of the frilly ones were hideous but nothing wrong with a sensible one, sometimes ones with nice embroidery if he felt fancy. Peter said he liked those the best so Jonah wore them the least just to spite him. He went downstairs and made breakfast before he woke up the kids. They had 3 kids, two boys- Tim and Martin, and one girl- Sasha, all sensible well educated children as Jonah raised them to be. Martin was a bit fanciful and more prone to crying than Tim, fair enough as he was the youngest, and Tim was a showoff, always trying to impress his siblings. Sometimes to his own detriment, like the time he fell off his scooter while playing outside, Jonah hated when they cried or got hurt, not just because he cared for them- only a little- he hated dealing with their whining or whatever bruises they got this time. It was tiring. He didn't really want kids if he was honest, but then again none of this was his first plan, Peter had told Jonah that he betted he couldnt spend a week away from working at the institute and one thing led to another so now here he was. Definitely a bet gone wrong but not all of it was terrible. They pretended to be an average family, Peter working and Jonah mainly staying home- he spent a lot of time Watching his neighbors, he was determined to have a better garden than Deborah next door and occasionally poured cola on her plants so they would wilt just a little, she hadn't found out it was him yet- they had their three kids and jonah was on the PTA. Perfectly normal, the only tricky part was making everyone else believe it, and not murdering each other as they played the part of suburban parents. Jonah focused on the task at hand and yelled at Sasha, Tim and Martin to wake up or they’d be late for school. He heard their footsteps on the second floor as they slowly got up and came down for breakfast.
“Mom, I wrote another poem, wanna see?” Martin piped up, drinking some tea- his favorite drink- and looking much too cheery for this early in the morning.
“Not right now Martin can't you see mommy is busy. Ask your brother later.”
“Yeah sure i’ll look later but then you have to play a game with me.” Jonah sighed internally, well that was bound to end with one of them crying, Tim played too rough and Martin was much too clumsy, he decided not to interfere unless Tim told Martin to slide down the banister again. He gave them each their lunches and headed to the car, they made it to school on time thankfully and he kissed each of them on the cheek before driving back home. Maybe he’d spend some time Watching Doug - one of their neighbors, a loud and obnoxious sports fan- again, it was always fun to make him just a little bit afraid. He heard the phone ring from the kitchen and went to pick it up.
“Hello you’ve reached the Bouchard and Lukas household this is Lydia how can I-” The voice on the line cuts him off.
“Hello Jonah! How are you today?”Jonah laughs, it's Nikola Orsinov, she's been putting up a facade as the co-owner of a yarn shop with Annabelle Cane at the moment, having wanted to join Peter and Jonah in their challenge of normalcy. She and Annabelle had already been dating and it was amusing to Jonah that she had chosen a yarn shop. Always pulling strings Annabelle was, even in her off time apparently. She usually called Jonah to tell him about whatever gossip was going on in the avatar world.
“Mmm fine as always Nikola, what's the news today.”
“Weeeell, Jude and Agnes said they can't make it to knitting night this week, they're finally going on a date, which I called that by the way, you owe me 5 bucks you said they wouldn't go out until next week.”
“Hmm alright I suppose I do owe you then.”
“How are the kids?”
“Fine thank you, Martin is still writing terrible poetry, Tim is still falling off scooters and Sasha is quiet as always. I swear she's the only one with any sense, but she does join Tim in some of his adventures.”
“They're good kids, feel free to call me if you need me to babysit again.”
“Of course, well I’ll see you later Nikola, I need to finish the housework for today.” He hangs up before she gets another word in. He didn't call her for babysitting anymore, not after they all got lost in a wax museum, Martin cried of course and Tim thought it was a game. He sighed, Nikola was fine, but definitely not meant to have kids.