Work Text:
“Josh Lyman’s office.” Donna tucked the receiver between her cheek and shoulder, continuing to type the memo she’d spent the morning researching.
“Hi.” A bubbly woman’s voice came through the phone. “Is Josh in?”
“He’s not, he’s in a meeting. What can I help you with?”
“Oh, I’m just trying to connect with him... is there a better time to call back?”
The informality of the request caused Donna to pause her typing and give the phone call her complete attention.
“Is there something I can help you with?” Donna asked, trying to figure out what was going on.
“Can you give him a message?”
“Sure.” Donna grabbed the spiral bound book of message slips and picked up her pen. “Your name?”
“Christine Clarke.” The woman stated plainly.
“And what organization do you represent, Ms. Clarke?” Donna knew how to screen calls. This certainly wasn’t the first time someone had tried to vie for a moment of Josh’s time.
“Oh, no,” she laugh. “It’s nothing like that. Just tell him Chrissy called. I’m in town for a few days. His number is unlisted these days and I stopped by his place but he wasn’t there. Tell him he can reach me at the Watergate, room 4810.”
“I’ll... give him the message.” Donna stared at the slip as she placed the receiver back on the cradle. Josh didn’t receive many personal calls on the office line, and when he did she knew what was going on. Chrissy, however, wasn’t a name that rang any bells. And there was something about the familiarity with which she spoke of Josh that made Donna sure she’d remember someone like Christine Clarke.
///—///—///—///—///
“I’m starving. You wanna order take out for lunch?” Josh breezed by Donna’s desk en route to his office.
“It’s 5:45,” she informed him.
“And?”
“Well, I think that makes it dinner at this point.”
Josh raised his eyebrows. “So, are we ordering food or not?”
“I’m meeting Jack in the mess at 6:00. Do you want me to bring you something?”
“No.” Josh felt the enthusiasm from the progress made his meeting begin to drain. “Maybe I’m not so hungry after all.”
“There’s snacks in my bottom drawer,” Donna reminded him. “I have those cheese flavored things you like, and granola bars. To tide you over.”
“That’s okay.” He opened a folder to try to get some reading done.
“I’ll get them.” Donna quickly popped out of his office, returning with a small package of snacks and a stack of messages.
Sam swooped in behind her, taking a seat in Josh’s visitors chair.
“I rearranged your afternoon when Ginger told me the meeting was going to run over so your appointments are spread throughout the rest of the week. You have calls from Congressmen Kinder and DeWolfe on the amendment, Senator Jorgensen on replacing the Secretary of Transportation. Toby has been by to stare in frustration and say nothing 3 times while he works on the outline of the inaugural and someone named Christine Clarke called to let you know she’s in town.”
Josh, who had been facing his computer, turned quickly to face Donna at the mention of the last name on the list.
“Chrissy?”
“That’s what she said,” Donna confirmed, watching Josh closely as she handed him the message slip.
“Chrissy?” Sam questioned. “As in Chrissy with the big....” Sam cleared his throat “smile?”
“She’s in town?” Josh clarified.
“At the Watergate for a few days.” Donna confirmed.
“Who is she?” Donna asked, looking back and forth between the two men, hoping one of them would give her an answer.
“She’s Josh’s old flame.” Sam supplied. “They dated for a while, and then were on and off for years.”
Donna, who had no idea how she’d missed this part of Josh’s history, was intrigued. “When was this?”
“They met in college,” Sam supplied. “And then occasionally through law school and after college.”
“What happened?”
“They broke up,” Sam stated unceremoniously. “Twice.”
“Thank you, Sam,” Josh stated gruffly.
Donna arched her eyebrow at the new information, but pressed for more.
“Twice? Why?”
“Because he was a workaholic even at 20, I guess. He never talked to me about it. Wanna tell me now, buddy?” Sam smirked, amused that he might be getting under his friend’s skin without actually upsetting him.
“No.” Josh stared at Sam.
Sam turned his attention to Donna. “Chrissy told Lisa that she was ready to get married at start a family, and Josh wasn’t ready yet.”
“Thank you, Walter Winchell.” Josh remarked dryly.
“Yet?” Donna questioned, turning her attention to Josh. “It was on the horizon?”
“No. But her mother, and my mother, and Chrissy thought it should have been.” Josh ran his hands through his hair.
“So then what happened?” Donna asked, leaning in the doorway.
“Aren’t you late for your dinner date in the mess?” Josh questioned, hoping to effectively end the conversation.
“You should call her,” Donna told him, glancing at her watch and gathering her things to head down to the mess.
///—///—///—///—///
“Did you call her?”
Donna leaned in the doorframe to Josh’s office.
“Donna...”
“Well, she reached out. She wants to see you.”
Donna stepped forward and perched on the arm of Josh’s visitor chair. The bullpen had been mostly empty for hours and Josh was working in the light of his desk lamp.
“It’s complicated. And she probably hates me.”
“She didn’t sound like someone who hates you.”
“No. She isn’t the type to let you know outright.” He picked up the message slip, still sitting next to his phone.
“You’re not curious? To know what she wants? Or to see her.”
“Ah...” Josh sighed. Letting the small paper fall back to his desk. “I don’t know. She probably just wants to tell me that I’m an asshole. And she’s probably right.”
“Josh!” Donna gently admonished. “Don’t say that.”
He shrugged, looking away from her.
Donna rounded the corner of his desk and leaned on the edge.
“I didn’t mean to push you,” she told him gently. “Or bring up bad memories.”
“You didn’t.” He leaned forward in his chair, moving to rest his elbows on his knees. He’d never really told anyone about his breakups with Christine, and the truth was that Donna hadn’t touched a nerve.
She reached out and softly placed her hand on his shoulder.
He opened his mouth, ready to tell her the whole story. If there was anyone he could talk to about it, it was her.
“Donna?” A voice came from the bullpen. “You ready?”
Josh flinched, leaning back in his chair and away from Donna as though he’d done something wrong.
Donna stood, hovering for a fleeting moment, before saying goodnight as Jack waited in the doorway.
///—///—///—///—///
“You look very handsome in your Joey Lucas suit,” Donna told him, patting his lapel. “I’m sure she’ll think so too.”
“It’s not my Joey Lucas suit,” Josh half whined.
“I know, I know. It’s your regular Tuesday suit.” She grinned, answering his desk phone on the first ring.
“Mhmm.” She stated into the handset. “He’ll be right out.”
“She’s here?” Josh asked, letting out a puff of air.
“She is. I’ll walk with you. I have to take a file to The East Wing.” It was a decent cover, Donna thought, even though she simply wanted to see Chrissy for herself. This was a component of Josh’s history that she didn’t know much of anything about. “Are you going to give her the grand tour?” She asked as she fell into stride with him.
“I don’t know,” Josh shrugged. “I don’t think she’d be interested.”
“It’s The White House. Who wouldn’t want a personal tour? And from the Deputy Chief of Staff, nonetheless. You’re a powerful man.”
Josh let out a little puff of air, muttering under his breath. “Yeah. That I think she’s interested in.”
“I’ll be back in a few hours,” Josh told her as they parted ways. “You good to stick around in case something goes sideways with Leo’s thing?”
“Of course.” She nodded. “I’ll be here.”
///—///—///—///—///
Josh motioned to the waiter for the check, ready to pay the bill and put Christine in a cab back to her hotel. He had a feeling that the night would end this way.
“Do you want to grab a nightcap?” She asked coyly. “Maybe at the bar at The Watergate?”
“I’ll have to pass,” Josh told her with no regret. “I’ve gotta get back to work.”
Chrissy rolled her eyes. “Work, work, work. Nothing has changed. That’s why we didn’t work out, you know. You didn’t want do anything but work.”
“No, Christine.” Josh sighed, “we didn’t work out because you didn’t understand me, and you never bothered to try. We didn’t really like each other that much, but you wanted a husband and a family of 4 and a white picket fence and you thought you could convince me to give it to you.”
Josh had seen the writing on the walls. Chrissy knew his father was a prominent litigator and from practically the moment they’d met she’d tried to convince Josh he should follow in Noah’s footsteps. He’d known all along that it wouldn’t work out, but Chrissy seemed like the kind of girl he was supposed to date. She was well put together and mild mannered. Everything about their relationship felt like something he should do, not something he wanted to do. When he ended it the first time, he thought he was doing them both a favor. And when she came back into his life the second time, she was familiar. She assured him that she was looking for something casual and uncomplicated. She didn’t say much about his erratic work hours and the minimal time they spent together, but it wasn’t long before she was waiting impatiently for an engagement ring.
He didn’t want to hurt her, but he couldn’t keep pretending, either. This time, she left him.
Everyone around him assumed he would be devastated. He was nothing short of relieved.
///—///—///—///—///
Donna was just shutting down her computer when Josh rounded the corner and entered the bullpen.
“Hey. You’re back early.” She gave him a bright smile. “How was it?”
Josh shrugged. He wasn’t quite sure what to say. “How’d it go here?”
“Unusually quiet,” Donna reported. “The President is in the residence, Leo just left for the night and CJ called a full lid about an hour ago.”
“You’re heading home?” He asked.
“I was thinking about it,” she admitted. “I’m tired and I wasn’t sure you were coming back.”
He briefly glanced into his office, grabbing his backpack and returning to Donna’s desk.
“I’ll walk you out,” he told her. “I can do this reading at home.” If she wasn’t going to be there, he didn’t particularly want to stay.
Donna wrapped her scarf around her neck and buttoned her coat as they made their way out the front gate. They could split a cab, she’d told him, since she was going to Jack’s place that evening. It was on the way.
They bantered back and forth as the car made its way through the snowy streets of Georgetown. Josh felt comfortable for the first time that night.
The cab turned onto Jack’s block and Donna reached for her wallet, Josh waving her off before she could pull out any cash.
“So tell me,” Donna asked him, curious. “Was she the one that got away?”
Josh gave her a sad smile and shook his head before responding with total honesty.
“No. She’s not the one.”
His answer hung in the air for a moment, Josh staring out the window as Donna bit her lip. He wondered if he’d said too much.
Donna’s mind spun, quickly going into overdrive to convince herself that he wasn’t implying anything further.
Josh shifted his weight slightly, glancing down at his gloved hands and cleaning his throat as the cab slowed to a stop.
“See you tomorrow?” He asked as he did every night, just to make sure.
“Yeah.” She nodded her head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “There’s always tomorrow.”