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Zura coughed up blood and ash as he dragged himself out of the ruins of the Heavenly Bird, and Tatsuma emerged beside him with several members of his faction. It took a while to get everyone out, but miraculously, they were all still alive.
“That was quite the experience,” Tatsuma said. “Not a fun experience, but an experience.”
Zura struggled to his feet and coughed into his hand, and he was still coughing when they were away from the broken ship. There was no dust in the air now. Why was he still coughing, and why was there so much blood? His head hurt too, and he felt so weak…
“Zura,” Tatsuma said, “are you all right?”
“Yeah,” Zura tried to say, but he couldn’t and collapsed to the ground instead.
At least the ground was still here. At least they won, even if it was only for now. He didn’t see Utsuro anywhere, and there were little stars in the sky. So many…
That was the last thing he remembered.
***
“Hey,” a voice said. “Wake up. I made ramen for you.”
Zura opened his eyes slightly, but he immediately closed them again because it was too bright even though the light should have been soft. It was a lamp…an Elizabeth-shaped lamp…and he smelled spices…
“Ikumatsu?” he heard himself say in a voice hoarse with the scars of coughing.
“No, this is Satan,” Ikumatsu said. “Welcome to hell.”
“Hell…doesn’t have angels…”
“An accurate observation,” Ikumatsu said. “Now eat the ramen.”
Eat? Food was the last thing Zura wanted, although he didn’t know what the first thing he wanted was either.
Well…maybe he did.
He finally opened his eyes, squinting in the light that only made his headache worse, and Ikumatsu was sitting beside him. There was a glass of water next to her. Could he have that?
He reached for it, and he wondered why his hand was shaking, and he ended up knocking it over. Ikumatsu cleaned up the water and filled the glass again, and she added ice this time.
“Can you sit up?” she said.
Zura tried, but all the strength in his body was gone. Ikumatsu put some extra pillows under his shoulders to prop him up just enough to drink the water, and he did, and it helped a tiny bit. Just a tiny bit.
“Tatsuma brought you here,” Ikumatsu said. “He said he was going to take you to the hospital, but they’re overwhelmed with the wounded and you stopped coughing up blood a while-”
Zura promptly coughed blood into his hand.
“Never mind,” Ikumatsu said. “Do you know what this is?”
“Blood.” He looked for something to wipe it off with.
Ikumatsu handed him a washcloth and gently rubbed another one on his face. “No, your illness.”
“Some sort of space disease?” Zura said, leaning into her touch and the soothing coolness of the washcloth. “I don’t know.”
“How long have you been like this?” Ikumatsu said.
“Several days,” Zura said. “I started feeling bad when we arrived on Rakuyou, but this is the worst it’s been.”
“What hurts?”
“My head, mostly. And my stomach…I don’t want to eat.”
“Drink more water.” She put the glass in his hands again. “Do you want painkillers?”
“A samurai has no need for-”
“I’ll bring you some.”
“No, I’m-”
“Not in pain? Don’t give me that shit. You’re crying.”
He was?
Ikumatsu reached over and wiped away his tears, and that gesture only brought more tears — he realized now it was because he’d forgotten her touch. It was so nice and so calming and he didn’t want her to take her hand away. She was here again, and he was here again, and he didn’t have to worry about anything anymore.
There were times…many times…where I thought I wasn’t coming back to Earth, where I thought I wasn’t coming home to you. But I’m home now, and I’m not leaving again.
He wanted to take her hand and hold it. No, her. He wanted her. He wanted to cuddle with her and watch movies, except maybe he didn’t want movies because his head hurt. Maybe he wanted to sleep… Yeah, sleep was good. But when he slept, he wanted to be next to her because she was so soft and he missed her so much.
Then her hand was gone, and she was walking towards the door.
No.
Don’t go.
Where are you going?
Come back.
Come back…
She did come back, but it felt like forever, and she put two pills in his hand.
“Take these,” she said.
Zura took them with some water, and then he waited for them to work. The effect definitely wasn’t instant because his head was still on fire, but there was something that would be instant, something that always made him feel better.
Can you hug me? For a really long time? Please…?
Only if she wanted to, and she wasn’t, so…she probably didn’t want to. But he wanted…he needed…
It didn’t matter. If Ikumatsu didn’t want contact, that was it. It was simple. She had boundaries, and he respected them so much. But…
Maybe if I ask.
But it was such a stupid thing to ask for, and if she wanted to hold him, she’d already be-
“You look horrible.” She sat on his bed and patted her shoulder. “Come here. I’ll rub your back.”
What was he supposed to-
WHEEZE. He wasn’t expecting that. She’d grabbed him under the arms and squished him into her chest, and now his head was resting on her shoulder. But he wasn’t complaining. This was exactly what he wanted. Yes. Her. Good. This was good.
More tears ran down his face because he was finally with her again, able to hold her close and walk through town with her and share snacks with her. Well…no snacks right now. But they could have some later, and they were going to have so many, and they were going to get smoothies at the little shop down the street. And flowers! They could pick flowers for each other. So many flowers…
She rubbed his back for a while, and he didn’t know how much time passed and he didn’t care. The pain medicine started working, and even if it didn’t, she was medicine in her own right and he felt so much better. And her back rubs were so nice and-
A fit of coughing clawed at his chest and throat, and Zura tried to suppress it but ended up coughing horribly anyway. To his horror, he didn’t cover it well enough and got blood on Ikumatsu’s shirt. NO. He ruined it, and that was so gross. He lifted his head away from her, afraid of making it worse and knowing damn well he was going to keep coughing. He repaid her kindness with this?
“It’s okay.” Ikumatsu put his head back on her shoulder with a gentle hand. “Don’t worry about it.”
“I’m sorry,” Zura said, as if that fixed anything.
“I said don’t worry,” Ikumatsu said. “Just rest.”
She brushed his hair out of his eyes and patted his back when he coughed again. “Here,” she said as she put the glass in his hands again. “Drink.”
Zura’s hands were still shaking, and he tried not to spill it on her, but of course, he did. “Sorry…”
“Don’t apologize,” Ikumatsu said. “Did you at least drink some of it?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
She brought him closer somehow, and a tiny giggle broke through his tears. He loved being squished like this. This was what he needed after everything that happened over the past few weeks. No, this was what he needed all the time, and it was possible now that he was back. And maybe Ikumatsu needed it too.
“Were you all right without me?” Zura said without thinking. “Not that you’re not independent,” he added quickly. “Not that you need someone to-”
“It was awful, actually,” Ikumatsu said. “I was really worried about you. I should’ve come with you.”
“No,” Zura said. “I’m glad you stayed. Otherwise, the shop might not have been here when you came back.”
And I know you can’t lose it.
Ikumatsu was quiet for a moment, and then she said, “You’re right. But I wish I never had to choose between the two most important things to me.”
“You didn’t have to,” Zura said. “I wouldn’t have let you get on that ship anyway.”
Not that you couldn’t handle the danger. Not that I didn’t want you by my side. But I didn’t want to lose you in the depths of space.
Though thanks to Utsuro’s war, Earth later proved to be just as dangerous as the stars.
Zura’s eyes fell on the sword Ikumatsu kept in the corner of the room. “Did you fight?” he said, almost not wanting to know the answer.
“Yeah,” Ikumatsu said. “Eventually I didn’t have a choice.”
She coughed. “I was just defending the shop, though. I wasn’t involved otherwise. You would’ve killed me.”
“No,” Zura said, “but I want you to be safe.”
Especially when I’m not here to protect you.
Ikumatsu rolled her eyes and rested her cheek on his head. “You have too much concern for me.”
“You already have so many scars.” Zura ran his hands over the scars he knew she had on her back. “I don’t want you to have more.”
“You don’t have to worry about that anymore,” Ikumatsu said. “At least, not for a while.”
“You don’t think this is over?” Zura said.
“No,” Ikumatsu said, “because Utsuro didn’t die.”
What?
“I saw him fall,” Ikumatsu said. “That was it. And it was into an Altana gate, so…you know? I wouldn’t get my hopes up. But…”
She squeezed Zura with the warmest, softest affection in the world. “Don’t worry about that right now. It’s out of your control, and right now, the skies are clear again. Stand under them with me.”
“Stand?” Zura said. “I think I’d rather run.”
“What are you, six years old?”
“No, I’m Katsura.” He hugged back, hoping his embrace was just as soft as hers. “I want to race you to the woods. Then we can climb trees and laugh and not care about anything, because it’s only a matter of time before everything comes crashing down again.”
“But we have time,” Ikumatsu said, “so don’t worry. We can do all of that, but you need to get better first.”
She made him drink more water, and then she tugged a blanket over him. “Good night. Go to sleep and stop talking to me.”
“But you’re nice to talk to,” Zura said. “And I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” Ikumatsu said, “but I want you to get better already. You need to sleep.”
“But I have so much to tell you.”
“Tell me in the morning. Or the afternoon. Whenever you wake up.”
“I want to tell you now.”
“Go to sleep.”
“But-”
“Zura, if you don’t go to sleep right now, I’ll make you go to sleep.”
“Really? How?”
“I'll knock you out with, uh…” She pointed at the uneaten ramen sitting nearby. “That ramen bowl.”
“Ouch. That’s mean.”
“You’re right. I’ll have to do something else…” Ikumatsu’s hands went to his ribs, which…oh no. Oh no. “If you don’t go to sleep, you know what will happen. You are powerless to stop me.”
“You wouldn’t dare,” Zura said, though he was smiling because in reality, he loved being tickled. “My only weakness…”
“Not your only one,” Ikumatsu said, “but one of them, yes. And look! You’re still awake!”
“No! Sleeping now! Bye!”
“Too late!”
“That’s not fHEHEHEHE!” Zura absolutely lost it when she tickled him. “Stop! You can’t tickle a samurai!”
“I can and I will,” Ikumatsu said. “Where’s that little samurai stomach of yours? Eli told me it’s VERY ticklish.”
“Elizabeth betrayed me?” Zura said as he tried to protect his belly from her. “How could he?”
“I bribed him with ramen,” Ikumatsu said as she flipped him over like a pancake. “HAHAHA! Got it!”
“No! Impossible!” Zura was crying from laughter, and the tickling banished any pain that lingered in his stomach. “This is not fair!”
“Life isn’t fair,” Ikumatsu said. “Hehehe! You’re stuck. I can tickle you forever!”
“Not if I have anything to say about it!” Zura broke free and seized a pillow. “I challenge you to a duel!”
“Challenge accepted,” Ikumatsu said as she picked up another pillow. “Starting on a count of three. Three!”
“What happened to one and two?!” Zura said as he narrowly dodged her attack.
“They don’t matter,” Ikumatsu said, “much like your efforts to defeat me!”
“I will defeat you!”
“In your dreams!” She pounced on him and tried to pin him to the floor, and he in turn tried to pin her, and their fight lasted for a while. The crunch of popcorn alerted Zura to Elizabeth’s presence in the doorway, and then he got bored and left.
“Fine, you win,” Zura wheezed a while later as he collapsed onto one of the pillows. “I’m tired.”
“That’s unusual,” Ikumatsu said. “You’re more stubborn than that.”
Zura waited until she sat down, and then he jumped on her. “I’m not stubborn! I’m Katsura!”
HEHEHE. She was so squishy and so cuddly and so precious and THAT SMILE WAS ADORABLE AND HE LOVED IT SO MUCH AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
You. He hugged her for the millionth time in their lives, and there would be millions of other times to come. I missed you.
I missed you so much.
“Hmm,” Ikumatsu said as she let him squish her. “Your attacks are powerless against me. Because once again…”
She tickled his stomach again, and he ended up laughing on the floor. “I know your weakness.”
Zura could barely think through all the laughter, and he couldn’t stand the tickling, but it also felt so good, and there was so much love in it. It was the kind of love friends shared, though there was a point in time where they stopped being friends and started being family. Or maybe they never stopped and they were family all along, or a mix of both, or… It didn’t matter. It was love. He didn’t need to label it.
They fought again — it was friendly, of course, no matter how many punches and headlocks and judo flips there were — but it ended quickly with Ikumatsu hugging him. “Got you,” she said through her giggles. “I win.”
Zura wanted to argue and certainly wouldn’t accept a loss, but he was so tired now that all he could do was snuggle into her embrace. Actually, he couldn’t even do that, instead falling out of it and onto her lap, where he rested his head. They both had horribly bony legs, so he snatched a pillow before lying down again. Hehe…who was really the winner here?
Ikumatsu rested one arm on his chest and dug in a bag of chips with the other. Where had that come from?
“Do you want some?” she said.
“Not really,” Zura said. “I still don’t want to eat.”
“All right. They’re here if you change your mind.” Crunch.
Besides his lack of an appetite, Zura felt a lot better now, and he lay there for a while, his body finally at peace. Nothing hurt, and he wasn’t coughing up blood anymore, though his heart was about to burst.
With love.
There was so much love, more than he could ever describe, and even though it was impossible to describe it all, he had to try.
We have some time before Earth is in danger again. In that time, I can tell you everything, though not with words. We’ll share snacks. We’ll run together. We’ll laugh together. We’ll be the same idiots we’ve been for so long, the same idiots we’ve come to love and trust with every last piece of our hearts.
That is how you will know.
That is how you will understand.
His eyelids grew heavy, and he listened to the crunching sounds and the rustling of the bag of chips. Eventually it stopped, and Ikumatsu put her hand on his head, and he didn’t care that it was covered in salt.
You mean the world to me.
He thought she might have leaned down and given him a friendly kiss on the forehead, and he smiled as he slipped into soothing unconsciousness.
It’s good to be home again.