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Peter Parker was gone.
Those were the words rushing through Tony’s mind as he sat on the cold, hard ground of a planet that was not his own.
Peter Parker was gone. He was dead. Snapped out of existence by a mad tyrant corrupted with power. He had lost his life in a fight they hadn’t even won, and it was all Tony’s fault.
Who gave Peter that suit? Who let him on a ship that took him this far into space? Who pulled a fourteen year old kid into a life or death situation because he was having an argument with his friend? What kind of horrible, self righteous asshole made a teenager fight in a war that wasn’t even his to fight? Apparently, Tony did.
And now Peter Parker was gone.
Tony’s gaze drifted across the battlefield. Almost everyone was gone. Other Peter. The large gray man. Thanos himself, who had obviously left of some other means.
The blue woman was still there. And so was Strange.
Strange .
Rage surged through Tony’s veins, and he amended his past statement. There were actually two people to blame for Peter Parker’s death.
He forced himself to his feet and struggled over to where the cloaked man was crumpled against a piece of rubble.
“How could you?” he meant to scream, but it came out as more of a rasp. “How dare you?”
Strange’s eyes found his, and Tony saw his own pain reflected back in them. For once, he didn’t care.
“It was the only way.”
“Fuck that!” he cried. “Fuck it all! If it was the only way, then why did we lose? If you had just kept the stone, then no one would have died! Spider-Man wouldn’t have died!”
“You’ll see, someday. You’ll understand that this was what I had to do.”
How could he say that? How could anything justify Peter’s death?
“Shut up with your stupid mysterious comments and vague predictions, Strange. You are the reason Spider-Man died and that is unforgivable .”
“He wasn’t the only one,” Strange ground out. “Don’t you understand? Half the universe is gone. Why does one kid matter so much to you? I thought he was just your… ward, or something.”
“I lied,” Tony whispered as he felt the fight drain out of him. Accusing Strange would get him nowhere.
“What?”
“I lied! I lied to you, I lied to him, I lied to myself,” he admitted, sinking to his knees.
“What did you lie about?” Strange’s voice was quiet. Almost kind.
“I told you he was my ‘ward.’ I told him he was my intern. I told myself he was just Peter Parker, the sweetest kid I had ever met, but someone I wasn’t attached to . But I lied .
“As long as I’ve lived, I told myself I was never going to have kids. I was never going to be like my father. Well look at me now. I found a boy who I so desperately wished would be my son, I never told him I loved him, and now I’ve lost him.
“Just like my father.”
Strange had watched in shock as he ranted, but now understanding passed over his face.
“I believe I owe you an apology.”
“What?” Tony’s voice came out just above a whisper.
“Had I known that Spider-Man was your son, I would not have been so callous and vague about my plans. The instincts to protect a child are very different from those to simply fight an enemy, and I apologize for using them against you.” Strange spoke quietly, and with understanding in his voice. He could probably relate in some way or another Tony had come to learn that every superhero had lost someone in their journey.
Tony took several seconds to process everything he had said, but he finally whispered, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. And now, I think you should know that we still have a chance of stopping Thanos. Of getting everyone back. If you come with me now, we could save Spider-Man.” Strange pushed himself up from the ground and held out his hand for Tony to take.
“Peter.”
“What?”
“His name was Peter. Now let’s go save him. Let’s go save them all.”
He grabbed Strange’s hand.