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Karl’s karaoke stream was about to start in 8 minutes. Sapnap, Dream, George, and Bad were all already on a call. Karl would be joining in exactly 8 minutes deafened. George watched the time tick down.
The others in the call were talking about Quackity and how he wouldn’t be there. He wasn’t home according to Karl, and Sapnap was making a joke that he was at Karl’s.
“He doesn’t want me to know because he thinks I’ll be jealous,” Sapnap says off-handedly. George can hear the half-smile gracing his lips as he says it.
“Wouldn’t you be?” Dream’s teasing voice comes through George’s headphones.
Sapnap doesn’t respond, instead letting a half giggle half snort fill the silence.
6 minutes. George hasn’t said a word since the call started other than a quick “Hi,” when joining. He was feeling sort of queasy. The last time he was in a karaoke stream, he had jokingly started singing “Sweater Weather” with Dream. Although he had heard Dream sing plenty of times before, this one felt a little different.
He still remembers how it made him feel to hear his best friend say “touch my neck and I’ll touch yours”. It had felt like a tiny shock going through his system.
“What about you, George?” The all too familiar voice startled him. He had just been daydreaming about it, after all. George knew he had been quiet for too long for Dream to ask him a question so directly.
“Hm?” George hummed. “I was scrolling Twitter.” The lie rolled off his tongue with ease. He had been lying to Dream a lot recently.
“What song do you think you’ll sing?” Bad interrupted. “I’ll be singing something with a little bit of a kick to it. Do you think 5 Finger Death Punch is appropriate?”
“I think the Zoey 101 theme song is more your style,” Sapnap laughed. George could make out gruffs and murmurs coming from Bad’s mic.
“I haven’t got anything in mind, no,” George said. He tried his best to put a smile into his words for Dream’s sake. He knew the man was listening intently for his reply.
It must not have worked because a second later, a message popped into their private chat. “Are you feeling good enough tonight to do the stream?” it read.
Recently George had been missing most of his friend’s streams. A small “I’m sick,” or “I’ve got a headache, I’m headed to bed,” were being used a bit too often lately. It was better than the truth. Better than telling his closest friends that he thinks he liked the thought of Dream singing to him. He tried his best to avoid getting in voice chats that Dream was in. The less he had to hear his voice the better.
But this only led everyone to worry about George, and when Karl begged him to be in his stream last week, he agreed. Thinking it would give him enough time to pull himself together, he spent the next week texting everyone that he was starting to feel a bit better. Little did he know, 3 days before the stream, it would be changed from a jackbox stream to a karaoke stream. George dreaded joining the call.
“yea just still a bit out of it” George was tired of lying. Tired of pretending his body wasn’t telling him he wanted to be here. Wanted to hear Dream sing quietly in the background, like he was hiding. Like he didn’t think his voice was special.
“Ok. I hope you start to feel better :)” Before George had a chance to even think about responding, a ding rang in his ear telling him Karl had joined the call. He opened the stream on his other monitor. Plenty of people were already watching, and Karl’s face had just popped on screen. Chat was asking what songs they’d sing. One asked if they could sing Sweater Weather again.
“And what I think about.” At first he could put his finger on why it was making him feel so energized. “One love.” He continued on singing in his loud obnoxious voice, trying to drown out the pink very easily beginning to cover his cheeks. He remembers being glad he didn’t have his camera on. “Two Mouths.”
“Yea, George is here. Say ‘hi’, George.” Karl’s excitement could be heard miles away. George wished more than anything that he could make up a good enough excuse to leave the stream.
“Hi, Karl’s stream.” He sounded tired. Sleep deprivation was dripping from his voice.
“You sound tired. When’s the last time you slept?” The message came through with a small chime. Dream always had a way with reading him. Whether it be his face, his messages, or a single sentence spoken aloud. He could do this. He could handle texting no problem.
“a bit ago” The stream went on this way for a while. Sapnap, Karl, and Bad sang the most, while George and Dream texted all by themselves in chat. George knew Dream was just worried about him. He hadn’t talked to him much since the night of the stream. In fact, that last time he’d had this long of a conversation with his friend had been right after the stream.
“What was your favorite song?” Dream asked. They had been in a call with just the two of them for about 45 minutes now. The stream long over and the stinging in his gut subdued by now.
George took a second to respond. “I don’t know. Maybe when they sang ‘Hey There Delilah’,” he said with a small laugh attached at the end.
“You sure it wasn’t ‘Sweater Weather’?” The question was so direct, George didn’t know how to respond. It had definitely been a moment of the stream he couldn’t forget. It still hadn’t reasoned in him why his stomach aches hearing Dream sing the words to him. “Let me hold both your hands in the holes of my sweater.”
The memory filled him with giddy butterflies. “No, why do you ask?” His face was bright red. Had he done something to indicate to Dream that he had liked hearing him sing? He thought he did a pretty good job hiding his excitement behind his obnoxious singing. Did he give it away that he enjoyed Dream singing to him?
Wait, no! That's not right. Dream wasn’t singing to him! He was just singing for the viewers. Why had he even thought that? His blush was growing.
“Because it’s trending.” George hopped on twitter and sure enough, there it was. “Sweater Weather” on his ‘for you’ trending tab. He clicked on a video someone had clipped from the stream. There they all were in game, with Karl dancing in his tiny frame. He tuned his awful singing out and there it was. Dream’s voice just barely peeking through. It felt sincere. It felt warm and comforting. It felt too real.
When the video repeated, he didn’t bother scrolling away. He just let the soft voice roll over him. It wasn’t until Dream spoke that he realized he hadn’t muted himself. “Are you watching Karl’s horrible dancing?” His small laugh sent more butterflies through George’s gut.
“Yeah. It’s pretty bad, isn’t it?” George asked. He couldn’t help the small throat clearing he had to do before speaking. There was no way he would sound believable without it. But Dream saw right through it, as he usually does.
“Are you sure that’s why you rewatched it, George?” He froze at the way Dream said his name. Almost in a teasing tone. “You sure it wasn’t because you wanted to hear my beautiful voice?”
George’s mind was at a standstill. Completely deny it? Say it’s not true and that he was being weird? Or go with it? Play into the game they have been at for years. The game that had never once bothered George or made him think about his words carefully. Until now. He decided on playing into it. What harm could it do?
“Maybe I was.” George debated if his next sentence would be taking it too far. If this ever came back to bite him in the ass, he told himself he’d blame it on how tired he was. “If I was, would you sing again?”
“You want to hear me sing?” Dream’s voice was sleepy, too. He could hear the raspy texture taking haven on his vocal chords. He could imagine Dream at his computer, his head resting delicately on his open palm. His eyes closed. “Want to hear me sing for you again?”
‘Again’. George had never said Dream had sung to him. Yet here Dream was, saying he was singing to George the first time. He was getting his hopes up. This was their game. Dream was playing a game that they had kept going all this time. Right now though, it felt dangerous.
“I’m actually getting pretty tired. I think I’m going to head to bed,” the first of many lies George told over the next few weeks spilling from his mouth. He quickly ended the call after, not letting Dream have any chance at responding. His head slowly lowered itself to his desk, resting his forehead against the cool wood.
George was brought out of the memory by another message appearing in chat. “You think of a song to sing yet? A lot of chat is asking if you’re going to sing?” Truth be told, he didn’t want to sing, let alone be here.
“dont think ill be singing tonight” he responded simply. He looked back over the stream to see his character sitting on a corner of the stage. He hasn’t spoken or even moved in nearly 15 minutes.
“George, sweetheart. Will you please sing for us next?” Karl asked. Chat exploded with ‘Sweater Weather’. He grimaced at the thought, but inside his heart began racing.
“No, sorry,” he felt bad about denying the request, knowing how much the fans wanted it. He worried about how much shit he’d see on twitter after the stream. One more lie wouldn’t hurt anyone. “I’m still getting over a cold. Got a bit of a headache. I would love to hear Sapnap sing ‘Fireflies’, though.”
That seemed to work for everyone as Karl immediately started typing to bring up the karaoke version on youtube. Sapnap was mumbling about how he just sang last and it wasn’t fair. Bad was simply jumping about the block stage, his character taking small hits of damage every time he jumped into the crowd made of wooden stairs. Dream however, was sitting in the opposite corner, not moving or speaking. What was he doing?
The ringing of George’s phone made him jump. He had put it on do not disturb and was not expecting any calls. He understood what was happening when he saw Dream’s name appear on the screen. He faintly recalls changing the settings to allow Dream’s calls to come through.
“Sorry, guys. Got to take this,” he said into his mic, then muted himself. Chat was already filled with people asking who was getting a call.
“Probably his mom,” Sapnap joked. “Hey, send me her number already.” George rolled his eyes and left himself muted instead of replying.
He chirped a quick “yes?” when answering the phone. It didn’t make sense for Dream to call him right now. Especially during a stream they were both on.
“So, I know you’re not really up to stream right now,” Dream said casually.
“Is it that obvious?”
“Just a little.” A small silence settled over them. The cold of the glass screen against George’s cheek felt comforting as it slowly warmed to the temperature of his skin, and he tried his best not to let his face get too hot thinking about how this was the first time he’d heard Dream’s voice in a couple weeks.
“Anyways,” Dream said in a small voice. “I came up with an idea.” His voice was almost shy. Like he wasn’t sure of himself.
“And what is that?”
“Well seeing as you’re not up for singing, or streaming for that matter, I figured we could have our own little party in this call.” His excitement could be heard through the rough sound of his phone. “I’ve missed you and I have a surprise for you!”
George held his breath. Dream missed him.
“I figured that it would help your mood. Do you remember the last time we talked?”
George remembered it very clearly. He remembered exactly how flustered he had reacted when Dream flirted the idea of singing for him again. “Yes.” He sounded small and he knew it.
“Well we had joked about you wanting to hear me sing again and so I have been practicing a song actually.” George was sure he was going to pass out. “For you.” The breathy chuckle stuck to the end of his words. George couldn’t see him but he knew he was smiling.
This was easily crossing the very lines George had established for himself in his few weeks of silence. His mind was racing. Dream missed him. Dream had been preparing a song to sing. A song specifically chosen to sing for George. Dream was now going to sing to him. The thoughts swirled in circles around his brain. He didn’t know how to respond. What would sound the least nervous?
“Do I know the song?” he went with.
“Um, yea probably. It’s a cover though, so it’s changed a bit. Lyrics are still, um, the same, of course.” George noticed he was fumbling with his words. Dream cleared his throat and George closed his eyes to imagine what he looked like.
He was most likely sitting at his desk, leaning back into his chair. His legs were splayed under the desk in sweatpants. Starkly contrasting how George had imagined him sitting the last time they talked. He wore a loose fitting t-shirt that showed off his arms. His face was cocked to the side with the phone resting against it. His lip was in his teeth, trying to get out the words he wanted to say. The hand not holding the phone was tapping the arm of his chair. George wanted to hold it. Wanted to know if they were calloused or smooth. Warm or cold. Wanted them to hold his hand back.
“I’m gonna put you on speaker so you can hear the music too.” George thought about him practicing singing. He probably had whatever song he’d chosen playing softly in the background while doing mundane tasks. He might’ve sang it while just sitting at his computer. Maybe while driving to the store. Probably had it playing while in the shower. George pushed the thought from his head. That was definitely no way to think about his best friend. “Is that alright?”
“Yea, sure.” He hadn’t responded in a bit. His mind was moving too fast for him to even think about speaking. He’d probably say something he’d regret later.
“You can say you don’t want to do this,” Dream said innocently. He said it as if ‘this’ held a lot of meaning. Like he was hoping George understood that it meant more than just a phone call late at night. “If you have a headache or want to do something else, we can. Or if you don’t want to be in a call with me, I com-”
“No!” George shook his head at how forcefully he said it. “Sorry, uh. I just mean I’m good with this. I... I missed you too.” He slowly opened his eyes. No more lies. “This is nice.”
“Alright!” Dream’s shy tone was no longer detectable. Instead just cheerfulness was heard. “I’m gonna play the song now,” A soft laugh was tied to the end.
When the song first started playing, the first thing George thought was that it’s piano heavy. Not something he would assume Dream listens to. And definitely not something he thought Dream would listen to and think of singing to him. His heart fluttered with how soft the song sounded without even hearing any lyrics yet. He couldn’t tell if it was happy or sad yet.
“When I wake up, well I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who wakes up next to you.” Dream’s voice was soft. An octave too low for George to even consider singing. It was velvety. Or maybe even soft like a blanket right after a shower. George struggled trying to find a synonym that even came close to matching the feeling of Dream’s soft tone.
When he finally digested what the words were, he was thrown. He knew this song. He remembered how funny it was to sing it when he was younger in that silly accent. A soft giggle escaped, which he quickly stifled in case Dream heard.
“And when I come home, yeah I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s coming home to you.”
This cover was much slower than the original, and somehow more sincere. Why was Dream singing this song?
“And when I’m dreaming, well I know I’m gonna dream, I’m gonna dream about the time when I’m with you.”
It wasn’t until the chorus hit that George fully understood the meaning of the song. Sure, he’d heard it plenty when he was younger. But it wasn’t until now that he finally listened with intention to the lyrics.
“And I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 hundred more, just to be the man who walked 1000 miles to fall down at your door.”
George stopped breathing. Was this a joke? Did Dream choose this song because it was funny and a classic? Or did he choose it because it was a love song, insinuating he was frustrated at the distance between them? Surely it wasn’t the latter. His mind was in overdrive. It didn’t make sense for Dream to sing this song.
“And when I’m lonely, well I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s lonely without you.”
He debated leaving the call. It’d be easy. He could press the hang up button and say it was a miss click. Or he could say his headache got worse and he needed to go to sleep.
“And if I grow old, well I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s growing old with you.”
Leaving and coming up with an excuse would be a lie. George told himself he wouldn’t lie anymore.
As the chorus repeated, George found himself taking very shallow breaths. It was almost like he was scared to be too loud. He didn’t want to disrupt Dream, or miss any second of the singing. As much as he found it hard to believe the other man was singing directly to him, he never wanted it to end.
It made him feel special. A small tear rolled down his cheek before he even realized his face was growing hot and eyes filled to the brim.
Dream was humming along the instrumentals very softly. George’s heart was full, while his brain was in shambles.
The song was coming to a close. “When I wake up, well I hope I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s waking up to you. And when I’m dreaming, well I know I’m gonna dream, I’m gonna dream about the time I had with you.”
The piano faded into nothing and was followed with a silence that made George’s bones shake. When it became clear that Dream wouldn’t be the first to talk, George decided to break the deafening stillness.
“That was lovely.” He shook his head softly. He didn’t want to come off as too emotional. It was just a song after all.
“Did you, uh,” Dream coughed a bit. “Did you like the meaning behind the song?”
Again, silence followed. Dream couldn’t seriously be insinuating that he meant the lyrics. Although, why else would he sing a song specifically for another if not for the lyrics? No, no, there could be plenty of reasons. Dream could have chosen it because he liked the instrumental of it. He could have chosen it because he wanted the song to be one he recognized that would be easy to listen to. He could have chosen it to tease George like he has been for years.
This continuous game was exhilarating. It was exhausting. It was confusing and funny and hurt his chest at 4 am when he thought about it harder than he meant to. Was anything real. Could Dream ever mean any of it.
“Did you mean it?” He wanted to know. He was tired of guessing. Tired of playing along because it felt like the most logical thing to do. Tired of wishing Dream’s words made him feel warm instead of confused.
“What do you mean?” Of course Dream was going to make him say it.
“Did you mean the lyrics? Or did you just sing it because we’ve been doing this flirting thing for years?” George’s lips ached with his honesty. “Because,” he stopped short. Scared of not lying anymore.
“Because what, George?” Silence filled the line. Karl was giggling on screen. Sapnap was singing softly through his headphones on his desk. If he listened close enough he could hear Bad as well. Dream was sitting still in his corner.
“Because, I want you to mean it. I want you to mean anything you say.”
George had heard the term “time stood still”. The way he felt right now was similar, but not how he’d describe the feeling. He’d probably say something like “time moved through a wall of maple syrup”. It was still moving. The stream timer was still ticking. His breath was still entering and leaving his bloodstream, albeit forcefully. But it was so slow. Everything felt like it was a monstrous task, taking all of his energy to complete. By the time he had pulled his phone away from his ear to check the call was still connected, his limbs felt like they hadn’t rested in years. Everything felt overwhelmingly sweet. Like his muscles ached from the amount of sugar he’d pushed them through.
“George,” his voice saying his name felt like cold water. It washes the sticky syrup from his shoulders and legs. It leaves him feeling like he’s taking a nap after a long day outside and a nice shower. “I’ve meant everything I’ve ever said.”
“What?” The words weren’t sinking. Their meaning wasn’t clear, even though George heard them clear enough. “What do you mean by ‘everything’?”
“I mean everything George. I thought that when you flirted back it was a joke, just like everyone else. But I can’t lie about how I feel. So, I’ve never lied. Or faked anything, for that matter.”
George’s thoughts were short. No clear sentences making their way to the front. A bunch of words raced around. “Never lied” “never faked” “it was all real”. George didn’t have a response to anything Dream had said.
“I wish very much,” Dream’s voice cleared all his thoughts. Almost like if George was thinking a single thing at the moment, that it would cover Dream’s words. No matter the fact that Dream’s voice was so loud in his ear it almost hurt his head. “that I was with you right now. And it’s ok if you don’t feel the same way. But I won’t lie to you. I never have. I never will.”
George took a full minute to reply. Dream never interrupted the silence, which he’s glad for, because he’s almost certain that if he had, he'd have to start all over at completing a response. “I wish you were here right now, too.”
“Well I guess it’s my turn to ask in which way you mean that,” Dream said with a laugh. “Do you want me there as your friend or…”
“The second,” George supplies for him.
“So, as my enemy. Got it.”
Dream giggles which forces one from George. “Shut up.”
“We should get back to the stream,” Dream says. “They’re probably wondering where we went.”
“True,” George’s eyes crinkle at the sides. “We should go in at different times though. To make it not suspicious.”
“How very middle school of you, George.”
George scoffs, but joins the stream nonetheless. His friends greet him with smiles and cheers. He watches Dream's character as it starts hopping across his stream. Their phones stay connected, simultaneously on mute.
He eventually gets talked into singing sweater weather. Sapnap takes over the lyrics halfway through while Karl takes off his headphones to dance behind his chair. And if Dream unmuted himself to sing softly into George’s ear, then none are the wiser.
The words that once filled George’s heart with stinging uncertainty mixed with butterflies, instead now fills him with warm honey. Not sweet enough to hurt, but enough to make him want more. Something Dream seems more than willing to provide.
George giggles when the song selection switches to disney and Dream sings on stream with a multitude of accents and characters along the group. Everyone in the stream is having fun, including George. And he reminds himself that this is only the beginning of the warmth spreading through his muscles, soothing the ache he felt the weeks preceding this night. In the years preceding this night.
He reminds himself that Dream meant it. That he always has.