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Cordelia sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose as she prowled the halls of Ylisstol palace in search of her husband. Something had been bothering Robin since well before the war with Plegia had ended. Initially she trusted he’d to come to her, or any of the Shepherds really, for help. And the fact that he hadn’t left her feeling confused, hurt and frustrated. Hence why she was going to get to the bottom of this and get Robin some help.
All she had to do was find him.
After asking everyone she ran into and spending several hours walking in circles Cordelia eventually found Robin squirreled away in a dusty corner of the library, staring absentmindedly out a window. Evidently, he was so distracted he didn’t even notice as she slid into an empty chair next to him, requiring her to gingerly place her hand on his shoulder.
“Robin, are you okay.” Despite her best efforts she still flinched as Robin jumped in surprise.
“I-oh-uh-Y-yes. Why wouldn’t I be?” He punctuated his sentence with a clearly forced smile as he turned to face her. Cordelia sighed again.
“Robin, for the past several months you’ve been unfocused, distant, and visibly troubled. Please, talk to me.” She squeezed his shoulder and hoped in was reassuring.
“Damn, I thought I was doing a good job at hiding it…” Cordelia let silence be her answer for that. “But really, It’s nothing you need to worry about. I’ll be fine, I always am.”
Cordelia resisted the urge to slam her fist (or face) on the table.
“You’ve always been there for me when I needed it, please let me do the same.”
“Like I said, I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me.” He attempted to remove her hand from his shoulder, but she just tightened in response.
“Why don’t you trust me?” Despite her best efforts Cordelia could feel her eyes start to moisten.
“It’s nothing like that at all! I’m just…confused-no that’s not the right word. More like…have you ever had a revelation that just…completely turns your world upside down and leaves you utterly disoriented?”
Cordelia nodded, remembering what it was like when she realized her late squadmates had actually cared about her.
“Yeah, yeah I do. And I had you to help me through it. Please, you don’t have to go through whatever this is alone. I love you Robin; and it hurts seeing you like this.”
That seemed to get through to him, as Robin stood up and motioned for her to follow him.
“If we’re going to discuss this further, I’d like to go somewhere more private.”
Almost as if on cue a scholar strolled past the two of them and began poking around the bookshelves. As they left the library Cordelia noticed Robin was paler than usual and was visibly nervous. Eventually they found themselves in the palace gardens where Robin lead her to a small, untended grove.
“Okay, this should be-we should be far enough away here.” He swallowed. “Here goes.” He took several deep breaths and began. “So I’m not really sure what the best way to say this is, but the thing is…is…” he closed his eyes and clenched his fists “Idontthinkimamancordelia” Robin was breathing rapidly and his face was starting to flush. Cordelia was confused.
“Could you repeat that a little slower?”
“Cordelia, I-I don’t…I’m not…I’m not a man. At least, I don’t think I am.”
Cordelia felt anger begin to well up inside her.
“Robin, if someone has been harassing you-“
“What?! No! That’s as far from what’s going on as possible!” And back to confusion.
“In that case…what do you mean?”
“Ever since I woke up in that field something felt…off. And I could never place what it was. Like, I’d look at my body in the mirror and I knew something wasn’t right but always came up blank as to why. And little things, like the depth of my voice just never felt right. And, and whenever I would be compared to a woman like in a ‘you fight like a girl’ sense or if someone on the street ‘mistakenly’ called me ma’am it just felt…right for some reason. And it was just a million little things like that that just kept building and it all came to a head a few months ago when I found this.”
Robin reached into their robes and pulled out a small, thin book
“It’s a story about a man who gets turned into a woman as punishment by the gods, and after I read it I just…couldn’t stop thinking about how nice it would be if something like that would happen to me, or what would my life be like if I was a woman from the start and eventually it just sort of clicked that I was supposed to be a woman all this time and then I panicked because that was absurd, but it made sense in a way but I was worried about how everyone would react and-and-“
Cordelia crossed what little space was between them and wrapped her arms around Robin. She felt their knees buckle and the two of them sank to the ground. Then she realized Robin had started sobbing into her shoulder. They sat like that for a while until Robin was able to form a coherent sentence again.
“You-you still love me?”
“Don’t be silly of course I do.” She began running her fingers through Robin’s hair “I’ll admit I don’t fully understand what you’re going through, but you’re still the Robin I fell in love with.” They were silent for a minute “Why would you think that in the first place?” another pause.
“I-I don’t know. I was just so worried you’d react negatively and never want to see me ever again.” A small pause then, barely a whisper “Or that you wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with someone like me.”
“I’d never, you’d have to become a completely different person for that to happen.” A sudden thought popped into her head “Oh! Would you prefer it if I called you by another name?”
“Funnily enough, that’s actually the one thing that never bothered me.” And for the first time in months Cordelia saw Robin genuinely smile.
“Robin it is then.”
Robin wrapped her arms around Cordelia and nuzzled her neck.
“Thanks Cordy, I love you so, so much more than I can properly put into words.” Robin pulled away a mixture of embarrassment and elation on her face. “So, um, any advice on how to be a woman?”
Cordelia stifled a chuckle
“Well, there really isn’t a right way to be one, I think the Shepherds more than prove that. So it’s all a matter of finding what works for you.”
“What if it’s not enough? Like, what if I’ll always be a man to some people because I don’t fit what they think a woman should be like?”
“Well that’s their problem, not yours. And if anyone gives you trouble over it don’t be afraid to come to me. We’ll take care of it, together.”
“I-I will.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
A comfortable silence settled over the two of them and they remained like that for some time.
“Now that I think of it, there are some things you can do with your hair, face and clothes to make it easier for people to recognize you as a woman.”
Robin laughed
“Oh I figured makeup would help, It’s just that I know you’ve always relied on Sumia for that so I figured it would be easier to ask her for help with it.”
That earned Robin a light punch on the shoulder.
“You jerk.” She grinned. “And I’ll have you know I’m great at such things.”
“Hehe, my bad.” They both started laughing. “But before I do any of that, I’d probably have to tell everyone else first.”
“You don’t have to tell everyone all at once, if you’d be more comfortable with just telling say, Chrom, by himself first then do that. But it’s up to you.”
“I’ll have to think about it for a bit. But I should be fine as long as you’re there.” Robin blushed again.
“Take as much time as you need.” Cordelia reached out, interlacing her fingers with Robins.
“I will, thanks again for everything Cordy.”
She squeezed Cordelia’s hand and leaned in popping a quick kiss on her nose. Cordelia responded by grabbing the collar of Robins coat and pulling her in for a proper kiss.
“It’s getting dark, we should probably head back soon.” Robin mumbled when they broke away.
“Yeah.” Cordelia leaned into her and they made no effort to move.