Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Karl knows that summer flings don’t last. He’s had his fair share of them over his previous summers off of school. Going into high school he spent the whole summer with a girl from Massachusetts. Karl also shamefully fooled around with a few people last summer, but never at the same time. All of them were only in town for a week at a time. Karl lives in a tourist town after all.

Most people would be surprised by that because of his demisexuality, but it was just luck of the draw and Karl drew very well.

That’s why he decided that this summer will remain platonic a long time ago. This has been the plan since April when he was still in school. Karl’s friends would stay friends and nothing more. All feelings would be ignored and intrusive thoughts shoved out a window. It was going to be a good summer he’d enjoy with his friends; just friends.

It will be Chris, Chandler, Jimmy, and Karl versus the world. That’s the plan.

Of course, Karl has no idea he’s about to spend most of the summer hanging out with Alex and even more of it with some kid from Texas.

Karl’s house is quiet. His mom still hasn’t come home from work yet. He doesn’t have any pets so he’s ultimately home alone.

It’s his first official day of summer, but he can’t go anywhere. He has his license but no car to take while his mom is at work, so he invites his friends over.

He’s sitting on the floor against his bed. The air conditioning works overtime to make wearing sweaters in the summer excusable. Karl always keeps it extra cold in his room so he can bundle up.

Texting the group chat is second nature to Karl. There’s no doubt that he was the one who uses it the most. He’ll call each friend out on it and send the most unrelated memes that would change the topic of conversation completely when it’s active.

All he needs to say for the others to understand his offer is, My house?

Immediately, Chris cancels. Parents are taking us up to the lake already. Think I’ll be back next week.

Yeah. Can you set up that fire pit? Jimmy asks, more interested and apparently not worried about the fact that they’re leaving Chris out.

Sure. I think it’s out back already. Someone needs to buy s’mores though.

Chandler finally picks up his phone to get back to Karl and them. Bring Vanessa too. Karl’s lonely and I think she’s into him.

Vanessa is Chris’s younger sister. She’s probably going up to the lake with Chris too, but the joke is still there. Regardless, Karl doesn’t want her over his house. Vanessa is only a year younger than them, but she’s so awkward about it. She’s obviously attracted to Karl. She lingers for too long and laughs too loud. It makes Karl uncomfortable. He couldn’t deal with hosting her any day let alone on one he doesn’t have time to mentally prepare for.

NO ONE IS DATING MY SISTER! Karl can hear Chris shout through the screen, even though he only sends a text. It seems that only half of them are against Karl getting with Vanessa. Karl follows his best friend up quickly with the promise he’s repeated a thousand times to them.

This summer is my single summer.

Yeah right, Jimmy responds. Karl knows he’s laughing on his couch at home.

$50 that it doesn't last a week, Chandler bets.

Jimmy protests, I don’t know. Karl can be pretty strong-willed. I’d say two.

Guys give him a break and actually help him out here, Chris chastises the two of them.

Thanks, Chris.

Karl hears a car door shut outside. He shifts his weight to look out his window and finds his mom in the driveway. With a sigh, he updates the group chat. He offers to pick them up and go out.

Booooooo, Chandler sends with an effect setting the whole screen on fire.

Yeah, sorry. I’m not in the going out mood, Jimmy follows up. Karl tried to convince himself it’s fine. They can find another day to hang out.

Instead, he sinks deeper into the floor. What a great start to their summer for them against the world. Karl knew that they wouldn’t be able to hang out all the time this summer, but he didn’t expect it to blow up this quickly.

That’s fine, he mediates. Let’s try again when Chris gets back from the lake.

That will be at least four days from now. They probably won’t see any of each other until then. That’s fine, totally fine. Karl will busy himself with other things. He can hang out with Alex more and pick up a few shifts at his job. Maybe he’ll help his mom make dinner tonight.

He gets another text. It’s probably just Chandler or Jimmy confirming tonight won’t work.

Pendejo get on Minecraft.

Alex? Karl knows he has to change his plans but he didn't plan on summoning his other friend. Either way, it was something for him to do tonight.

Get on Discord too. I have someone for you to friend.

Without a second thought, Karl gets up off of the floor and boots up his computer. Who would Alex have for Karl to friend? It's just the two of them who play Minecraft. Alex doesn’t have any other gaming friends Karl knows of and Karl doesn’t have any other Minecraft friends at all.

Karl doesn’t need to think about his question for too long because Alex has already added him to a group chat with someone he’s never seen before. As soon as Alex sees him online, he creates a call. Karl joins it without knowing what to expect on the other side.

“Hello?” he says.

“Karl!” Alex greets him. “This is Sapnap.”

“Hey,” says the third person in the call. “I’ve been told we’d be great friends.”

“Me too,” Karl’s voice cracks and he hates it. He pulls his sweater over his face and leans back into his chair, hoping he’ll disappear into it. No one mentions it at all. In fact, Sapnap changes the topic completely.

“I’ll send you a friend request.”

Karl nods, forgetting that neither Alex nor Sapnap can see it. He’s too embarrassed to use his mic again though. Not a second later, as promised, the friend request appears in his inbox. Karl can’t help but notice that his profile picture is a panda.

“Sapnap? Is that a play on pandas?” He tried to make some sort of conversation, as lame as the basis maybe.

“Uh, yeah. It actually is.” Karl can hear Sapnap shift around on his side of the call. “Not many people catch that right away.”

“Really? It’s your profile picture? A really cute one too. “ Karl is cut off by laughter. He can’t tell if it’s nervous or genuine, but he likes to hear it. As Minecraft is booting up, he clicks back to Discord so he can watch Sapnap’s icon as he talks. It’s then when he realizes Alex muted himself.

“Alex, you there?” The call is silent while Karl and Sapnap wait for an answer that never comes. “I guess that’s a no.”

“So, um… how do you know Quackity?” It’s small talk but it’s better than silence.

“We go to the same high school actually. IRL friends.” Karl hates the words as soon as they come out. Who says that anymore? IRL friends. He suppresses a gag.

“Really?” Karl thinks Sapnap jumps out of his chair to get closer to his mic. “No way! I’m in state this summer! My dad is like five miles from Quackity!”

Karl is laughing at the coincidence. “What?”

Quackity’s icon unmutes and the charm rings out through the call.

“Quackity, when were you going to tell me you knew Karl in person, man?”

“So you’ve beaten me to the punch line.” He sounds smug. Alex knows exactly what he’s doing. Oh, honk, if Alex is setting Karl up- Karl realizes he hasn’t told his friend about his plans for the break. “Yeah. I was going to introduce you guys eventually but I figured there was no time like now, seeing as Sapnap is literally in town.”

“That’s what happens when you live in a tourist town.” The Minecraft Home Screen is now on full display on Karl’s monitor. His mouse hovers over “Multiplayer”. “So what server are we joining?”

Alex hums to himself. “I’m actually kind of hungry. Do you guys want to get something to eat?”

Karl audibly groans. “Man, I just booted up Minecraft like you told me to.”

“It’s not my fault you listened to me.” “I’ll pay.” The two responses ring through his ears at the same time. Karl can barely pick out one for the other. He takes a deep breath and looks at the facts.

He wanted to hang out with the boys in person earlier, but that blew up because Chris has to go up North, and Jimmy doesn’t want to go out. Alex is up for going out. This Sapnap guy really seems to like him. Karl had access to a car.

“Alright. I can pick you guys up, I just need Sapnap’s address.”

“Poggers.” Alex singsongs into his mic. “Let’s go for ice cream.”

Karl hovers his mouse over the hang-up button as an incoming DM from Sapnap buzzes on his phone. “Let’s decide in the car. I’ll be missing dinner.”

Sapnap agrees with a quick, “Mhm.”

“I’ll see Sap in five and Alex in ten. Put your best clothes on men,” Karl announces sarcastically. “We are going for greasy food and ice cream.”

Alex says something in Spanish and Sapnap audibly grins into his mic. With that Karl logs off of the call and runs downstairs. He gives his mom a quick greeting and hugs her before revealing he’s going out for dinner with Alex and his friend. Karl is out the door and in the driver’s seat before she has the chance to ask any questions.

Chapter Text

Karl realizes he never changed out of his sweater when Sapnap comes out in a hoodie and jeans. The coast was in eighty-degree weather and they both dressed for the fall. He guesses they are both crazy, but so is Alex. Suddenly it makes sense that the three of them are going out on an impromptu ice cream trip.

The house he’s picking Sapnap up from is huge and right on the beach. It’s three or four stories tall. Karl can’t really tell. The road is newly paved and narrow but the driveway is honking huge. There are only two cars in it, but Karl assumes there’s more behind the three closed garage doors. If Karl hasn’t lived in the area for so long, he would’ve thought that this is a year-round house, but no. A house this close to the beach? This is a vacation home and by what Sapnap said about his dad earlier, only one person owns it.

Chandler and Jimmy would go crazy to go to a party here. Who knows, maybe Sapnap will host one later in the summer. Karl wouldn’t be surprised.

“Karl?” Sapnap waves for his attention in the passenger seat. “Your jaw dropped.”

“You live in a party house!” Karl deigns to speak out rather than close his mouth. He turns around to back out of the very long driveway. The driveway that could fit two copies of his very normal-sized house in it.

“I guess? I don’t know.” Sapnap shrugs. “I’ve only been here for a week. I haven’t had the chance to take it all in yet.”

“Party.” Karl jabs a finger in its direction as he looks Sapnap straight in the eyes. “House.”

Sapnap’s eyes drift and he smiles. “Maybe sometime this summer.”

Karl straightens on the road and heads for Alex’s house. They sit in silence for a moment before Sapnap opens his mouth. Nothing comes out though. Wordlessly, Karl reaches for the aux blindly. Grabbing it on the first try, he hands it to Sapnap. Music would be better than this awkward silence neither of them can seem to break.

Sapnap’s taste in music isn’t something Karl hasn’t seen before. In fact, it’s exactly what Karl would expect from what he’s seen of Sapnap. He hums along to a few songs, knowing them from Jimmy and Chandler. Chris’s music was more up his alley.

They reach Alex’s much more average-sized house. He’s already waiting outside in the driveway and jumps around enthusiastically when Karl honks at him. Alex jumps into the back seat and immediately starts planning their night. Karl turns down the music so they all can hear him and Sapnap frowns, watching Karl’s hand.

“What about the Purple Cow? Sapnap, you haven’t been there yet, have you?”

He shakes his head. “My dad’s just been taking me to these really fancy restaurants that don’t serve actual food.”

Karl would kill to go to an over-the-top restaurant with those tiny meals you could eat in one bite. It was unbelievable that Sapnap was complaining about them. He watches Sapnap keep talking intently. There’s a chance that his mouth is agape and his eyes are definitely wide in wonder.

“Jesus, Karl. Pipe it down a notch. You’re nearly drooling,” Alex calls him out. “I thought you were asexual, mi amigo.”

He sits straight in his seat, turning himself away from Sapnap and wiping his chin just in case. Now is a good time to pull out of Alex’s driveway. “I’m demisexual and I wasn’t doing anything.”

The smile on Sapnap’s face certainly thinks differently. Karl grunts in annoyance as he changes gears. This was not going to turn into a fling.

“The Purple Cow for burgers?” The other two nod and grunt and verbally agree. That’s all Karl needs before he turns up Sapnap’s music, happily drowning Alex’s teasing out.

This time it’s Sapnap who turns down the music. Karl almost slaps his hand away from the volume but holds the impulse back.

“Are you okay there, Karl?”

No. Alex won’t stop pushing us together. I’m trying to stay single this summer. There’s no doubt in my mind that he’s setting us up. I just want food. I’m probably hangry. Alex needs to back off. My love life is mine. I barely know you but your house is intimidating and you look really good in those skinny jeans. Please don’t be anything more than my friend.

“I’m hungry is all. No worries,” Karl sighs and pushes his hair out of his face. He looks at Sapnap’s hair through the corner of his eyes.

While Karl was demisexual, there was no way he was demiromantic because he was already imagining running his hands through it while they sit together on the sofa and nuzzling it while they cuddle on his bed and-

“Fuck!” Karl barely hits the breaks in time as a car runs a red light in front of him. Alex stirs in the back. He knows Karl doesn’t like to swear.

Everyone in the car is holding their breath before Karl forces his out. He takes a deep breath and presses lightly on the gas. He should stop things before they get any worse for him.

“You know, Alex.” Karl looks up into the rearview mirror at his scheming friend in the back seat. “I was thinking of staying single this summer. No flings. Just focusing on myself.”

Alex pales. “That’s good, man. That’s a solid decision… How much did Chandler and Jimmy bet on that?”

Karl groans, leaning into the steering wheel to cover his reddening face after he parks at the Purple Cow. “Fifty for one week and two.”

Alex cracks up in the back seat, rambling to himself in Spanish. Karl picks up on Sapnap saying something that definitely was not in English either. He would take a guess at what it is, but he will only be horribly wrong.

“Am I the only one who’s not bilingual in this car?”

Alex and Sapnap exchange looks before they answer in sync. “Yeah.”

Karl groans into his sweater again. This summer is going to be long if he doesn’t understand half of the things that are being said around him. But he can do this. It’s just for the summer while Sapnap spends time on the coast. Whenever he hangs out with the others, everyone speaks English. He won’t have to worry about someone mocking him in another language.

Like flipping a switch on his thoughts, Karl sits back and decides to focus on eating dinner. The three of them climb out of the car and make their way into the diner. After being greeted by the hostess, the three of them slip into a corner booth with Alex sitting in the middle. He seems rather bitter about it, but Karl is forever thankful for the buffer.

They look at the menus and all order different burgers. Their drinks are still full within fifteen minutes because they keep talking back and forth about their favorite games besides Minecraft. Alex refuses to choose something other than the holy block game and gasps dramatically when Karl chooses Roblox. Sapnap chooses Valorant. Eventually, Alex unnecessarily claims he needs to take a piss and makes Sapnap move to go out to the bathroom.

They stare at the table awkwardly until Karl decides to finally read what’s written on Sapnap’s black hoodie in bright orange. “You’re from Texas?”

Sapnap nods. “Yeah. I grew up there. ‘Still live there but my dad insisted I visit him up here this summer.”

“I grew up in the South too. That is until my mom decided to move all the way up to Maine, that is.”

Sapnap chuckles to himself. “Is that how you’re wearing your sweater in this heat?”

Karl shakes his head abruptly. “No. I’m dying actually. My AC at home was cranked up and I just left without thinking.”

“I will be right back,” Sapnap laughs and gets up before Karl can protest.

It’s obvious to Karl what he’s doing and it’s so unnecessary. Sapnap already promised to pay for their burgers, he doesn’t have to go out of his way to do this one thing for Karl. It was just lunch and they’d go back home after ice cream.

A minute later, both Alex and Sapnap return. Alex is talking about the latest installment of something he doesn’t share in common with Karl. Sapnap on the other hand is holding a t-shirt that Karl knows exactly where it came from. While Alex slides back into the booth, Sapnap presents the shirt to Karl with five simple words. “Your sweaty arc has ended.”

Karl tries not to turn red but fails. He takes a large sip of water to try and cool down. He takes the shirt from Sapnap and gets out of the booth. “You know, most boys give the person they like their jacket, not their shirt,” he quips back.

Now Sapnap is red too and Karl giggles at that with a smile. He passes him to get to the bathroom and change. The shirt is a simple white tee with a pixel flame on the front. It smells of cologne that would be found at Walmart and not necessarily on someone who lives in that house. It doesn’t smell bad though. Karl can give him that.

He bunches his sweater up in his hand and goes out to find their table covered in food. Sapnap isn’t eating yet, but Alex is already halfway through his. He looks up as Karl sits back down.

“I tried to get him to wait but he just…” Sapnap looks over at Alex nearly deep-throating his burger and glaring at Sapnap. “…wouldn’t.”

“Itsth a good borgur.”

Karl laughs and looks at Sapnap, waiting for him to laugh too. Instead, he watches Karl laugh with a smile on his face. Something in Karl’s chest pangs, something he hasn’t felt in a long while, and something that should certainly not be acting up this quickly. He can’t help it that Sapnap was being so obvious and cute.

No. Stop. This is your flingless summer, he reminds himself and sits down to eat his burger.

Flingless summer or not, each minute Karl spent with Sapnap, it was becoming increasingly aware that he might need to rethink his sexuality.

Chapter Text

Jimmy and Chandler find themselves free and bored on the first true Monday of the summer. The whole group would have a chance to hang out if they decide to wait just one more day for Chris to come back from the lake tonight. Of course, Karl is just as bored and bouncing around his house unattended with no Monsters in sight since he was banned from having them. His mother suddenly decided they were too bad for her precious son and called it at that.

So, he makes the best decision and decides to have a midday s’more roast with Chandler and Jimmy while his mom is out at work. It gets Karl out of the Sapnap headspace he’s been stuck in the past few days.

He won’t deny that Sapnap had occupied most of his thoughts the past few days. Karl wasn’t crushing on him by any means. He is just… figuring things out by staring up at his ceiling and wondering what the honk happened the other day. It’s more than obvious Sapnap is into him. Right? That isn't just him being overly nice to a new friend? Whatever Sapnap means by it keeps Karl confused and questioning everything.

Karl has half the thought of inviting Alex and or Sapnap but knows as soon as the two show up, Chandler would be asking which one is the possible summer fling. He really wants to win that bet and Karl really wants to shut him up. He needs to be single for a week to make Chandler lose and two to beat Jimmy. His goal is the whole summer, but if all of his summer plans collapsed on top of him, Karl wouldn’t mind a hundred dollars to take the summer datefriend out to dinner. That won’t happen though because Karl is going to stay single and nobody will stop him from that.

He throws the marshmallows out the window and towards the unlit fire pit when Karl catches himself imagining the datefriend as Sapnap. Alex’s friend, Sapnap. Karl’s friend, Sapnap. It was platonic, platonic, platonic.

“What’s with the violence, Karl?” Jimmy walks into the grass and looks up to the kitchen window to his friend. With the basement walk-out being on this side of the house, Karl looks like he’s on the second floor when in reality it’s just the first.

“Nothing!” he shouts down and reaches to shut the window. “I’ll be down with the graham crackers in a minute.”

“Sure thing!” Jimmy calls back. Karl can barely hear him through the closed window. “Just don’t toss them out a window!”

As much as Karl does want to throw crackers out a window and pretend they’re Sapnap, he decides it’s best for him to walk them down so Chandler doesn’t have to buy those too. In fact, said third person of the daytime pit fire is out buying chocolate bars so they can all have proper s’mores. Karl knows that the three of them are absolute heathens according to most adults, but that’s because they’re teenage boys. There’s a level of uncivilization that even they won’t cross. That of which includes throwing graham crackers out of a window only for them to fall eight feet and break into a million pieces.

“You’ve been kind of under the radar the past few days,” Jimmy hits Karl right with it once he walks out of the basement.

Karl shrugs. “Chris is out of town so I’ve been keeping myself busy.”

There’s a silence in the yard Karl doesn’t know what to do with. He supposed Jimmy doesn’t either since it keeps dragging along. None of them really hang out one on one. With them, it’s all or nothing. Today is the first day they are actually hanging out as a group of three. The other day was the first day they’d even consider something like it.

“So… Do we need to keep you away from Vanessa this summer?”

Karl shivers at the thought. As much as he loves Chris, he really can’t stand his over-eager sister. “If I ever date her please know that I’m being blackmailed.” It’s half a joke and half a truth.

Jimmy piles wood onto the fire. “Noted.”

A car door shuts behind them. Chandler has arrived with chocolate. He makes a display of it, holding the candy bars above his head. “Your chocolate has arrived!”

He presents a bar of white chocolate to Jimmy. “Here you go you fucking weirdo.”

“What can I say? It’s like no other.”

“Yeah, it’s like no other because it’s disgusting.” Chandler pulls a random milk chocolate bar paired with a can of Monster and hands it to Karl. “Where did you get that shirt?”

Karl barely thought of getting dressed today to the point where he admits he didn’t change out of the clothes he slept in. Which are also the clothes he wore for the past few days and by extension, the day he met Sapnap. That makes it Sapnap’s shirt that he’s wearing in front of Chandler and Jimmy who are the friends he explicitly told he wasn’t going to get with anyone this summer. He won’t deny he’s gross and probably smells and Sapnap will definitely not want his shirt back if he wants to keep his closet smelling decent.

“The thrift shop,” is the best excuse he could come up with. His voice is high-pitched and nervous. There’s no way Chandler and Jimmy wouldn’t catch the obvious lie.

“And what’s the thrift shop’s name?” Chandler presses. Karl can’t tell if he’s teasing or if he’s actually annoyed about the chance of Karl already giving up on his summer promise.

“Resale for Upscale,” he states the first thrift shop that comes to mind.

Jimmy talks before Chandler can get too heavy with it. “Karl, if it’s a platonic interaction, you can let us know. That’s not a summer fling.”

“It was just from a thrift shop.” A thrift shop that lent him a shirt so he wasn’t stuck with a sweater in nearly ninety-degree weather and knows what it’s like growing up in the South and was just so excited to meet him after Alex mentioned him.

This is Karl’s flingless summer and Sapnap is just a friend who’s moving back to Texas come to the end of it.

“Alright,” Chandler states. “S’more time.”

So Karl makes s’mores with his friends he’s known since he moved here. He distracts himself from the boy moving into his thoughts and the ever-growing list of questions that seem to come included. Those questions will keep Karl up all night tonight while he’s trying to find an answer for at least one of them. Because how could he sleep with opened windows like that, letting in such a chill?

Just as predicted, Karl can’t sleep. He spends the first half of the night tossing and turning, effectively getting tangled up in his blankets. He’s counted all of the plastic stars on the ceiling at least nine times already. He and Chris put up together one day when he first moved to Maine. Karl had practically begged his mother to buy the stars for him. They still glow from the daylight they took in earlier.

That’s who he could talk to about this. Karl has vented to him for years. He always knows when to listen and when to give Karl advice that turns out to be useful and exactly what Karl needs to hear. Chris is a vault when it comes to telling secrets and he isn’t involved in the bet. He doesn’t want to be involved in it at all.

Karl pulls his phone and opens up his texts. He pulls the blanket higher over him. The air conditioning is set at most to the low sixties. Karl really should’ve worn pants to bed rather than shorts. He would make himself go get up and change, but it’s so much warmer under the blankets than out there.

He sends a simple, Hey you up? and waits for a response. It’s possible he’ll never get one, but Chris tends to stay up late at the lake. His family doesn’t really start anything there until noon, pushing everything back into the night. Karl wishes his family was like that. It would be so nice to let go and be carefree for a night. But then again his parents aren’t together anymore and his mom works by herself to put this roof over Karl’s head. He loves it though. He really does. Karl just wishes he can enjoy her a little more. He’s letting his brain ramble. He really should be thinking about how he’s going to present this whole situation to Chris.

His phone chimes and Karl practically jumps out of his bed to see it. Yeah. Wassup?

I’m questioning my sexuality again, He tells Chris how it is. There’s no point in hiding it from him or sugar coating it, especially when the whole point of texting Chris was to talk about this very thing.

Three dots appear and disappear until Chris finally sends his text. What part? Chris asks, knowing fairly well that his friend was panromantic on top of demisexual.

Karl stares at the flag on his wall. He can still make out the stripes in the darkness. He remembers when he came out, it was the first thing Jimmy did for him.

He was ready to go into a whole spiel about what demisexuality was. He was sure that they wouldn’t understand it at first, but of course, Jimmy surprised him. He’d pulled out his phone and walked up to Karl.

“Is this the flag?” On Jimmy’s phone was that very flag. Karl nodded. “Great. It’ll be here Wednesday.”

Karl never thanks Jimmy enough for how supportive he was and still is. Even if Karl isn’t demisexual, he’s sure he wouldn’t take the flag down.

I’m not sure I’m demisexual anymore.

Ever the group therapist, Chis responds robotically with, What makes you think that?

If Karl tells Chris about this all that means whatever is going on between Sapnap and him, however little it may be, is real. It’ll be real that Karl picks up on every cute remark Sapnap makes and it’ll be real that Sapnap was a little too excited to meet Karl and it’ll be real that Sapnap went out of his way to make sure Karl was sweating his ass off at the diner. Sapnap did all of those things, right? Karl wasn’t just imagining them?

Alex has a friend who came up from Texas this summer.

The three dots take an agonizingly long time before Karl can see whatever Chris has typed out.

Sexuality is a fluid thing and is welcome to change. There are labels but they aren’t the end all be all. Exceptions exist and this guy from Texas could be yours. You can still be demisexual and attracted to a guy. He quickly adds, That is the definition of a summer fling though.

Karl groans in frustration and throws himself back into his pillows. He needs to try and sleep again.

It is just what he was expecting from Chris. It’s stupid that Karl even considered that his friend would offer him anything but the truth when he asks for advice. For some reason though, he was looking for something to excuse it all, something to make Karl keep going. Of course, everyone keeps telling him to hold back as he asked them to.

Yeah. I know. Thanks for reminding me.

Chapter Text

“Is this whole house air-conditioned?!”

“Uh… yeah.” Sapnap stands with the front door open, letting cold air escape. He steps back so Karl can come in.

The disbelief must still be written on Karl’s face because Sapnap’s look of confusion turns into a smirk.

They’re in a large foyer that has nothing but an accent table sitting below a painting of the coastline. It’s empty and echoing and colder than Karl would ever keep his bedroom. He’s already regretting wearing just a t-shirt.

“You can borrow one of my sweatshirts.” Karl looks at Sapnap confused, only realizing he’s wrapped his arms around himself to prevent himself from shivering. “You know… so you don’t freeze to death.”

Sapnap walks out of the foyer and into another room. It’s also large and mostly empty. There are just three chairs hovered around a fireplace. Whoever decorated this house definitely does not have a knack for it. Karl stares out of the floor-to-ceiling window looking out over the ocean. He doesn’t want to know how expensive this house is with a view like that.

“Where’s Alex?” Karl spots an awkwardly placed spiral staircase in the corner. It’s tiny and cramped, but it leads somewhere. Is it staff? Is this house built to have staff?

“He’s already upstairs.” Sapnap leads Karl to another room. It’s similar to the other but more fit to entertain. There’s a flatscreen television set up on a wall and a bar on the other. Karl was right. This is a party house.

There’s another staircase hidden along the wall. Sapnap runs up that one, not waiting to see if Karl is following or not. Karl runs after him so he won’t get lost. He also could really use that hoodie right now.

Sapnap is closing a door behind him when Karl catches up. There’s a grey sweatshirt in his hand that he quickly tosses to Karl. He catches it barely, a little out of practice from being out of sports for the summer. Sapnap narrows his eyes at him before guessing, “Soccer?”

Karl nods. “And tennis.”

He smiles goofily and points to himself. “Football.” Somehow that cracks Karl up and he’s catching himself on the stairs before he falls down them. Sapnap comes over to help pull him up. “What?”

It takes a moment for Karl to form words because Sapnap’s hand is warmer than he expected it to be. Not that he was thinking about holding Sapnap’s hand, or running a hand through his hair, or just standing there with Sapnap’s arms wrapped around him until it’s so much more than socially unacceptable. No, Karl hadn’t been thinking about Sapnap at all.

“It’s just so Southern. It’s such a cliché.” Nearly everything about Sapnap was a cliché. The way Karl was already falling for him was a cliché.

“Sure thing Mr. Maine.”

“Hey! Massachusetts is the soccer capital of the country and I’m from Nebraska!” Karl’s giggles fill the silence of the hall as the two of them leave the stairs behind and forward to wherever Alex might be.

Sapnap looks over his shoulder at Karl. “Massachusetts? What about Massachusetts has to do with soccer?”

“What does Massa-! Massachusetts screams soccer mom! What are you talking about? Have you never been through Massachusetts?” He’s hysterical at this point. It’s getting hard to walk because of how much Karl has been laughing. Now Sapnap is joining in with him. Alex is going to be so confused. The two of them have stopped outside a grey door. Alex has to be behind there.

“Prove it!” Sapnap starts yelling. Hopefully, it was just the three of them here. Karl wouldn’t want to be introduced to Sapnap’s dad by him chastising all the boys about their volume.

This is ridiculous. Even if you live in East bumfuck, Texas, you should still know how suburban Massachusetts is.

Karl finally finds it in himself to shrug on the sweatshirt and act like a normal person. His shouting is still haywire, though. “Fine! I will! We’re going on a road trip!”

“Woo!” Sapnap shouts throughout the house. “Roadtrip!”

Of course, then is when he decides to open the door behind him and reveal Alex lazy scrolling through his phone. When their mutual friend catches on to the topic of conversation he sets his phone down and asks, “So we’re not playing video games?”

“No!” Sapnap reaches for the remote and shuts off the television. He points out the door past Karl. “Roadtrip.”

Alex, to say the least, is the most confused out of the three of them. If Karl is being honest, he doesn’t completely understand how they got here either. “Massachusetts? Right now?”

Sapnap stops shutting down everything to look at Karl. He shrugs and follows it with, “You're the one who suggested it.”

He really was. A spontaneous road trip with friends was better than playing video games, right? Massachusetts was only an hour away from their town anyway. They’d be back in time for dinner.

Karl pulls his keys graciously lent to him by his mother for the day and waves the two other boys out the door. Sapnap enthusiastically finds his way out of the house and calls shotgun. Alex is still very quiet and befuddled. Karl takes a step back from Sap.

“Hey, man. Are you okay with this whole road trip thing?”

Alex shrugs and pockets his phone as the two of them reach the front door Sapnap left wide open. “Yeah. I just wasn’t expecting it is all.” There’s a moment of silence where Karl knows to wait for Alex to say more. Five years of friendship has led Karl to notice that Alex is about to follow up with something else by the look in his eye and the posture of his shoulders hunched forward. “My mom wants me home for dinner tonight. She’s finally making ‘proper’ food tonight and she’s making it early so… poor timing I guess.”

His finger quotations hang in the air for a moment while Karl contemplates the fact that he’s going to have to be in a car alone with Sapnap for hours. Last time Sapnap was only in the front seat and he almost crashed because of how distracted he was.

Single summer, single summer.

It’s fine. If things get two out of control between the two of them, Karl can set boundaries. He can make the excuse that his mom needs him home or that he has an obnoxiously early curfew.

The three of them pile into the Jacobs’s car. Sapnap takes shotgun, seeing as they’re just dropping Alex off before heading South. It’s quiet until Karl waves off Quackity goodbye and catches Sapnap maybe doing the same in the corner of his eye. Sapnap may have just flipped their friend off, but Karl only caught a brief moment so he doesn’t know.

“Boston is only two hours away,” Karl doesn’t necessarily say to Sapnap, but anyone listening. He pulls out his phone and opens his GPS. “There won’t be too much traffic because the weather isn’t great down there. We can go to the aquarium or the museum for science or walk around a park. There’s a really good bakery I haven’t been to in ages…”

Sapnap audibly hums along to Karl’s rambling. There’s really no reason for Sapnap not to be listening since they are planning the day ahead of them, but somehow his attention comforts Karl. When Karl looks up from putting in the destination he finally picked out, he realizes that Sapnap has been watching him this whole time.

His eyes are hazel. They’re that pretty hazel that the ocean turns in autumn. Karl wants to compare the two in person one day. Swimming in an ocean that color would be cold, as cold as leaving a window open in the winter.

Shit, Karl shouldn’t know that.

Now he’s really on edge. If this weren’t his mom’s car, he’d make Sapnap drive instead. The music should help though.

It’ll be fine. Karl can do this.

Sapnap certainly seems excited to anyway.

It’s the third day of summer. Why is it so complicated already?

Chapter Text

The day I post this, my profile says I’m taking a hiatus for October and November so I can focus on writing an original work. Yes, I am still participating in NaNoWriMo. Working on that novel is going surprisingly well. However, I kept seeing things that reminded me of this story and letting me know what I need to do with it: I need to let it go.

I started writing this story when I learned I was moving to a town that was everything I hated. There are no forests here. It’s right on the beach and all the shops are seasonal. I’m eighteen and everyone my age is in college at least forty minutes away. During the period I was focusing on this story, I was reading one I didn’t particularly care for either. Cool for the Summer is a wonderfully written book by Dahlia Adler. I appreciated it as a writer, but as a reader, I enjoyed finishing it more than reading it. And lo and behold, it took place in a vacation town on the beach narrated by someone who had no friends. I hadn’t realized this before, but it inspired this fic as well.

A lot of things have happened from August, when I started this fic, to October when I’m now deciding to abandon it. I moved. It wasn’t something that I had to look forward to in fear and it wasn’t something that was happening. It happened. It’s over and done with. I’ve learned about this town and I understand that it’s where I live now. I don’t have to write this story to cope anymore. Secondly, one of my dogs died. I don’t know how exactly it’s made me hate this story even more, but without this dog sitting by my side while I write, it’s just not the same, it’s not enjoyable. I’m still writing. I will always write. But now that I write alone, I know what I want to write and what I don’t. I don’t want to write romance, especially slow-burn romance.

As someone who’s been reading fanfiction for years and has seen their favorite shows canceled left and right, I understand the pain and frustration of being left with an unfinished story. This story may not be completely written or even edited and it certainly doesn’t have many people waiting for the next update, but for anyone who wishes for it and anyone who comes across it, I’ve uploaded upload what I have. There are a handful of chapters prewritten and an outline that will tell you everything about this story I couldn’t. After this chapter are the unposted ones, the outline, and deleted and unused scenes.

I don’t know if I’ll come back to this account. I would hate to leave Logastellus unfinished or only have the care to upload the outline, but only time will tell. One of my biggest fears was my writing never seeing the light of day. If it’s only these two unfinished works, then so be it. I put my work out there for people to read, ignore, enjoy, and hate. So hate that I left you with an unfinished Karlnap fic because at least you were there for the beginning of it. I thank you for that.

Chapter Text

Karl isn’t supposed to be like this. He’s demisexual. Demisexuality has been his identity since freshman year. He knows that Chris said that sexuality is fluid and Chris is right, but that’s too complicated. It’s just as complicated as another summer fling right before his senior year.

The beginning of Senior year is that chaotic three months of deciding which colleges to apply to. College is where the rest of your life starts and he doesn’t need to have some boy that he’ll never reconnect with to influence his life choices. Karl does not want to end up swooning over a boy in Texas when Sapnap isn’t even guaranteed to be going to school in Texas.

It will be easier if nothing ever happens between them. They can be friends for the summer and when Sapnap leaves to go back home, they can be gaming buddies. Long-distance never hurts a gaming friendship.

Regardless, Sapnap insists on riding with the windows down on the highway with the music blaring at the highest volume. If there are any cops around, there’s no doubt in Karl’s mind that they will get pulled over. If it were anyone else, he’d mind, but Sapnap keeps singing along at the top of his lungs to the songs he put on the queue. Karl shamefully sneaks in a few glances here and there. Sapnap took his cap off so it wouldn’t blow away in the wind and Karl can’t stop thinking about how much he really, really wants to run his hands through his hair.

The traffic light is green now and someone is beeping at him. Karl presses on the gas and takes the left his phone instructs him to. He pulled off the highway a few minutes ago and now the two of them are entering the heart of Boston.

The skyscrapers are towering over the tiny Subaru. Boston is such a labyrinth that Karl has not had the time to prepare himself for. It’s a blessing that he remembered to use his GPS today. Wait, did he tell his mom where he was going?-

“This doesn’t scream soccer, I gotta say.” Sapnap stops the music and is not looking around out the window.

“We’re in Boston! It’s not going to look like soccer.” Karl bursts out laughing as he looks for signs for the nearest parking garage. The two of them are going to have to walk the rest of the way. “I’ll drive through some suburbs on our way back."

Sapnap hums to himself. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

“And you will!” Karl pulls down into a tall grey cement building. He didn’t get a chance to read the name of the garage, but he will when they leave. “But right now, I’m showing you Boston.”

The next few words out of Sapnap’s mouth are somewhat of a whine, a mumble, and a complaint. “You can show me a lot more than that but okay.”

Karl is thankful for his mother’s Subaru that the only thing breaking composure is his tomato red face. That comment came out of nowhere and Karl has no idea what to think of it. Sapnap must have realized that he crossed a line too, because even he, who’s been singing along to songs on the ride to Boston like his life depended on it, is as quiet as a mouse.

He pulls into a parking spot with room to spare on both sides before he whips the keys out of the ignition and jumps out of the car. The air in the parking garage is stuffy and hot but it’s still easier to breathe out here than in there.

“So where are your great plans taking us today, Karl?” Sapnap is shoving his phone into his back pocket when he walks around the back end of the car.

Karl tries to think about where the closest things are to the parking garage they’re in when he decides on the most cliche tourist attraction that would keep him away from sports of any kind. “The aquarium- and before you go off about how it’s the most boring thing to visit when in Boston, it’s the New England aquarium and it’s the best one we’ve got.”

He stares at Sapnap confused that he didn’t get some sort of reaction from him. Sapnap simply shrugs before he pressed the elevator button for the two of them. “I wasn’t going to complain. I could go to the aquarium right now.”

The casual reply leaves Karl smiling and bouncing on his heels with joy the whole ride to the ground floor. A silence fills the space between the two boys, but it’s a comfortable one that neither of them feels any need to fill. The elevator chimes cheerily and Sapnap waits for Karl to step out of the lift first. The streets aren’t as crowded as Boston streets usually are like Karl had predicted earlier.

He suddenly remembers how spontaneous this trip is and pats his pockets, worrying if he’s brought enough money with him.

Sapnap stops ahead of him, turning around to watch what’s going on. Karl must look so stupid to him right now. Either way, Karl finds his wallet and quickly thumbs through his money, sighing in relief as he puts it back.

Now, the silence is awkward and Karl quickly fills it with the very little he knows about this city. He points ahead towards the harbor. “If we stick to the harbor, the aquarium will show up any minute.”

The walk there wasn’t anything special. The two of them carried the dynamic they had been creating with each other since the beginning of the summer. Sapnap would seemingly watch everything Karl does as a puppy dog and Karl would effectively ignore it despite what it does to him, reminding himself that he is supposed to stay single this summer. Not only is it his only promise to himself, but it would be unfair to fall into whatever Sapnap has been offering him only for Sap to move back to Texas in the fall.

Already, Karl can wait for the end of the summer.

Their unspoken game ends as soon as Sapnap sees the penguins. Sapnap loves penguins. Karl almost loses him in the crowd around the exhibit immediately, only picking him out because Karl had already memorized his sweatshirt and cap of the day.

“Penguins, huh?”

Sapnap nods as Karl joins him at the rail. He’s watching in awe silently, but Karl still needs to fill the quiet between them. “They’re kind of like the pandas of the sea. You’re almost like a penguin.” Karl doesn’t understand what he’s said before he says it, but now that the words have left his mouth, he mentally prepared himself to guard that statement with his life and he will go down swinging.

“A penguin? Really?”

“Yep. They’re short and you only see them in black and white most of the time. Everyone loves them and nothing they could ever do can be wrong because of how cute they are. And they propose with a rock. You seem like the kind of who would propose with a rock…” Karl stops himself before he can dig a bigger hole. He said more than he should have and Sapnap took in all of it. Crap. Sapnap was going to know that Karl thought he was cute.

“Well, a diamond is a rock, so yeah. I’m going to propose with a rock.”

Karl giggles to hide his embarrassment but still finds the penguins entertaining because of it all. They’re much easier to look at than Sapnap is right now. “An expensive rock.”

“Yeah, but the right guy is worth an expensive rock.” Sapnap turns away from Karl to look at the birds too, just in time for Karl to nearly choke on air without an audience. Well, that confirms that how Sapnap has been acting around Karl could be an attraction. It’s nice to know he hasn’t gone crazy over the past few weeks, but oh… Karl needed to stay single. “Or girl,” Sapnap continues.

That gets Karl to look back at Sapnap. Lucky for him, Sapnap still watches the penguins chirp below. “Yeah. It’s not really about what they are but who they are.”

Sapnap looks Karl in the eyes. His mouth opens right before a little kid screeches in the excitement in front of the center tank. They spot a turtle swimming by. It takes Karl’s attention away from what was about to be said as he realizes what is happening.

“Turtles!” Karl grabs onto Sapnap’s hand and drags him around the penguins to the turtle tank. The two of them are half running across the aquarium until they’re standing right in front of a giant pane of glass as Karl stares in awe. The green sea turtle swims past them, not paying any mind in the world.

Sapnap’s smile on his face is almost slappable. “You know…” he starts with an obvious teasing edge to his voice. “You remind me of a turtle.”

Karl shouldn’t have said anything about penguins earlier.

“They live by the coast and they’re always wearing these shirts with really weird patterns. You’re both really smart. Most importantly, you’re old and endangered.”

Sputtering to get his words out, Karl’s entire face is entirely red. He’s barely able to wheeze, “There’s so much to unpack there.”

“Oh, I got this,” Sapnap grabs onto Karl’s elbow as the taller slowly started to fall to the floor, laughing. “We drove all the way from tourist Maine. You have some of the most elaborate and unique sweaters I have ever seen and you’re wearing them in July no less. That’s fucking weird if not adorable that you’re so dedicated. Karl, you are always the first one to solve a puzzle and think of a game plan when we’re gaming. And about the last two, I’ll be honest, Quackity told me how old you are, which I was surprised by because you don’t look at it at all. And there are no guys like you anymore.”

Karl is leaning against the pillar now, trying to organize everything he just heard, but it’s all melding together into one big giant sign that Sapnap likes him too. Going through everything over again, from his summer sweaters to Alex giving out his birthday like Halloween candies, the only thing that stuck with him was the last said.

“So, I’m endangered. Are you going to put me under wildlife protection?” Karl forces himself to stand up and pushes his hair out of his face from hiding his blush earlier. He’s only surprising himself by bantering back like that despite how flustered he was a moment before.

Sapnap places his hand over his heart mockingly. “Yep. I took a vow to protect you from all potentially douche-y partners.”

Karl leads them away from the turtles, “What happens when you leave after the summer?”

“Oh, I have a plan. Don’t worry about it.” As the conversation fizzles out, Sapnap and Karl look around the aquarium. Karl feels the echoing sound of the crowd starting to drill holes into his skull. “Do you want to go get food? It’s getting crowded in here.”

Without a second thought, Karl nods in agreement. He doesn’t even realize that Sapnap is starting to know him a bit too well.*

Chapter Text

Karl wakes up to the sound of a Discord DM. He’s a bit pissed off at first, but after seeing he slept until eleven after he finally fell asleep around four, he realizes it’s a responsible hour for someone to text him.

I’m fucking melting over here. Whoever has air conditioning, save me. Alex must be working on the beach today. He works for a private beach that runs an arcade as a side hustle. Usually, Alex works inside behind the counter, but sometimes his boss makes him go outside and try to convince a few beach patrons to check out the arcade.

Karl doesn’t know how hot today was logistically, but he did know that it’s too hot to ethically put any employees out in the sun. He pulls up the weather app to find that there is indeed a high of ninety-seven today. He winces at the report. There’s no way he even wants to find out what the real feel is. It will only be higher, in the triple digits even.

As far as he knows he’s the only one with air conditioning at home. So he offers Alex to come over to his house when he’s done with his shift, and by group chat extension, Sapnap as well. He has no idea what the three of them will do at the tiny house that only hosts his mother and him, but he’ll certainly brainstorm something. Maybe they will watch a movie on Netflix or dust off his PlayStation in the attic.

I’ll pick Alex up after his shift, Sapnap offers and Karl is forever grateful because his mom has the car.

Karl rolls out of bed and changes his clothes. He thinks about wearing a sweater seeing as he’ll be home all day but decides to put on a tee in case the three of them end up in the attic. He strolls downstairs and pours himself a bowl of cereal while he waits for Alex to get off at noon, still brainstorming how he can entertain an exhausted Alex and a rich Texan. Gaming is what they all have in common, but it can’t be that easy to entertain them, can it?

There’s a knock at his door a quarter past. Karl pauses his Netflix to get up and answer it. Sure enough, Alex and Sapnap are there.

“Air conditioning.” Alex pushes past Karl to enjoy the cool air. Karl wrinkles his nose as he does. By extension, Sapnap carefully walks in, making sure not to push Karl.

“You smell nasty,” Karl voices his thoughts a moment too late.

Sapnap widens his eyes and points to himself. “Me?”

Karl shakes his head. “No, no. You smell fine. Your shirt smells fine- in fact it smells great. Well good. Your shirt smells good. It’s Quack- Alex, Alex. He’s the one that smells.”

Someone please come in and bash Karl Jacob’s head in for being such a blubbering idiot in his own home. It doesn’t help that Sapnap is smiling. Why is Sapnap always smiling?

“It’s the sweat,” is all their shorter friend offers as an explanation.

“So, I was thinking we could do something on my PS4 or we could watch some Netflix-“ Karl cuts himself off when he sees Sapnap physically light up even more at the mention of gaming. “PS4 it is.”

Alex groans. “But your attic doesn’t have air conditioning.”

“I’ll bring a fan up.”

A half an hour later, the fan is on the highest setting and rotating between the boys on the couch and the console on the television stand. They are all on the brink of sweating while Alex kicks Karl’s ass in Mortal Kombat and Sapnap sits back, watching and laughing at their stupid decisions.

“Do you not know any finishers?” Sapnap questions. Alex kills Karl with a swift and basic punch to the chest.

He nods but keeps avoiding combinations. “Too hot to think about them. Are you sure the fan is up all the way?”

“As sure as the sun in the sky.” Karl kills Alex this time with a combination that he wasn’t aware of before. When Alex doesn't fight back in the next round, he looks over to see that the boy in the middle is absolutely zoned out. Karl waves his hand in front of him. “Alex?”

Alex blinks himself back into reality and sets the controller down on the coffee table. “I’m going to be real with you guys, I think I have heat exhaustion.”

Karl curses to himself and gets up to turn the console off. He pushes the fan out of their way down into the air conditioning. “Let’s go downstairs. I think we have Gatorade in the pantry.”

When Karl sees that Sapnap is helping Alex up, he rushes downstairs to find some. Unfortunately, all he finds is the nasty orange flavor, but at least will have something. Heading back to the living room, he grabs an ice pack from the freezer, knowing it will cool Alex down.

Sapnap is setting down Alex on the couch. Karl hands him everything in his arms.

“Put the ice pack on an artery and drink this.” Karl shoved the Gatorade into Alex’s hands. “And take a nap.”

“Jesus, Karl,” Alex groans and opens the drink. “When did you become a doctor?”

Karl slips up and glances at Sapnap quickly, remembering what they talked about yesterday. “I grew up in North Carolina, remember? People are even dumber down there.”

He hates how happy he is when Sapnap smiles at him.

Alex stretches out on the couch which kicks Sapnap and Karl into the dining room. It feels so formal and uncomfortable. Karl slips into the pantry quickly to grab some chips. Sapnap eagerly takes some when he gets back before Karl even sets it down on the dining table.

“North Carolina. I don’t think you ever told me about it.” Sapnap is already comfortable in one of the chairs, crossing his legs and watching Karl cross the room. Karl wonders why he keeps doing that, watching Karl that is.

Karl nods and sits across the table. He crosses his legs Indian style on top of the seat cushion. If his mom were home, she would chastise him for putting his shoes up on the furniture. Thankfully, she isn’t and Karl doesn’t have to take his shoes off in the dining room and he doesn’t have to introduce Sapnap to her. If Karl is being honest, he doesn’t even remember putting on his shoes. It isn’t like he’s leaving his house to go out at all. “I lived there until my parents divorced. My mom and I moved up here afterward.”

Sapnap laughs to himself. It’s bitter. There’s no real joy behind it. “Growing up in the South and divorced parents. What don’t we have in common?”

“I call you by your gamer tag and you call me by my name,” Karl offers.

This laugh is much more joyous. “Karl Jacobs is your gamer tag… on everything.”

He can’t refute that. Sapnap has seen Karl’s Discord and Minecraft and even his PS4 now. He wasn’t very creative when he came up with it and never changed it. To this day he was just Karl. He didn’t have an online alias like Quackity or Sapnap.

“I’m taller than you.”

“No. You’re not.”

Karl laughs at how confident Sapnap is about this. He gets up and pulls off his shoes. Sapnap raises his brows until Karl claims that they are settling this right here and right now. Both of them are now in their stocking feet and inching closer and closer to each other. When their chests are nearly touching Karl looks up to the top of Sapnap’s head, noticing that it’s lower than his. He brings his hand up to measure the night and brings it level to the middle of his forehead.

He’s too excited that he’s right about it to notice that Sapnap's eyes were drifting lower than his eyes the whole time. Karl jumps away, hopping up and down at the fact he was right.

“I told you!”

“Yeah. Yeah, you did.”

There’s a moment between them creeping up as Karl continues to dance around the dining room and Sapnap just stands back and watches. Karl needs to shut it down before it happens. He could ask Sapnap why he keeps watching him or why Sapnap seems too eager whenever Karl is around, but it’s better if he just doesn’t. Questions like that lead to summer flings.

“Karl…” Sapnap starts and Karl won’t let him finish it.

“Do you want lunch? I haven’t had any yet.” He takes a detour to the kitchen by stepping out into the hallways first.

Sapnap follows him. “Karl.”

“We can make sandwiches. I make a mean Italian.”

“Karl.” Sapnap is blocking his way to the pantry. He’s looking at Karl just like he was earlier.

Karl can not do this right now. He’s supposed to stay single this summer and Sapnap already keeps getting in the way.

“Yes…?” He's hugging the loaf of bread in his arms like it’s going to stop whatever Sapnap is about to hit him with.

Sapnap takes a deep breath before looking Karl in the eyes. “I know the moment ended already, but you’re really pretty.”

His face is already turning red. Karl hides it in the loaf in front of him. He turns on his heels and starts mumbling, “I’m going to ask Alex if he wants a sandwich.”

“He probably shouldn’t eat until he feels better.”

Karl mumbles again, turning one last time to go to the pantry. As Sapnap steps out of his way he mumbles his agreement. Italian sandwiches weren’t going to be enough.

Sapnap leans his head into the pantry. “I’m going to make sure Alex is still sleeping. We were kind of loud.”

With a nod, Karl leans his forehead against the shelf. When he’s sure Sapnap is in the other room and far enough for him to not hear Karl, he lets it out.

“You’re really pretty, too.” He allows himself to gather himself before he grabs the tinfoil from the shelf and leaves the pantry to set the oven on broil. Karl’s alone until Sapnap comes back from the living room, already rolling his sleeves up.

He steps up to the side of Karl, scanning the layout of meats and cheese and greens on the counter. Sapnap turns his head to look Karl in the eyes. “How can I help?”

Karl tries to think of a legitimate answer but all he can think of is how much closer Sapnap is to him compared to before and god does he have nice arms. He can’t stop thinking about how he wants him to get even closer but needs him to step one hundred steps back.

Instead, he holds up a finger as he reaches for his drink to “clear his throat” and organize his uncontrolled thoughts. As soon as he’s done, he points to the cheese, explaining how it needs to melt before they can do anything else. Karl keeps talking about something as simple as making sandwiches and Sapnap keeps watching him like no one had ever done something like this before.

Karl hates that he could get used to this because he knows he can’t. He told himself otherwise. If he gave in to the smiles and the stares and the pretty boy comments, he’d be failing himself. Karl promised himself that he’d stay out of summer flings this season. He almost hates the boy from Texas for making it so hard.

Chapter Text

Nothing happened to Karl for three days. He hung out with Jimmy, Chris, and Chandler three days ago and had his first summer shift at the café yesterday. But other than that, the only new thing for Karl Jacobs was staring up at his ceiling from his bed and wondering if he really was demisexual.

He’s known he is panromantic for quite some time; before he knew he was demisexual, actually. It just hasn’t occurred to him that he could just be pansexual all around.

It isn’t like Sapnap had given him any hard-ons just by being there. But Karl can’t deny the thought of getting hot and heavy with the guy. More so than he usually would at this stage in any relationship, not that they have one. He normally thinks of being romantic with someone before they are together, but making out with someone isn’t romantic.

A flingless summer isn’t supposed to revolve around a sexuality crisis caused by a boy from Texas. This whole ordeal is difficult.

As if summoned by his psyche, Karl’s Discord pings off of his computer with a direct message from Sapnap. Karl wills himself to roll off of his bed if not get off of it normally.

Know any good skating parks around here?

Of course, Sapnap would ask Karl and not Alex. Their shared friend knows nothing about skating to the point where bringing it up around him physically hurts Karl.

Karl is just about to tell Sapnap about the park in the center of town, or he can mention a few parking lots where he could get creative, but he’s bored and he wants to see Sapnap.

Give me fifteen and I’ll do you one better.

Sapnap immediately sends back a smiley face, a smiley face. Karl can’t contain the giggle bubbling out of his lips.

He shuts off his PC to look at himself in the mirror. It’s a cooler day so he can get away with the sweater he’s wearing.

Karl thinks back to what he said to Sapnap the other day. Most boys give the person they like their jacket, not their shirt. He opens his closet and sifts through his closet to find a shirt that won’t clash with his skateboard.

The shirt falls from his hands as soon as it’s pulled from the hanger. This is his single summer where he doesn’t dress up for anyone. Especially not boys from Texas. The sweater will do. If Karl is really so concerned about his outfit clashing with his skateboard, the purple and navy jumper will be just fine.

Regardless, he’s nervous when Sapnap walks out of the vacation mansion with a very well-kept skateboard in hand. Karl can’t help but notice he’s in a t-shirt today. Still, Sapnap can’t seem to wear a color off of the grayscale.

Sapnap opens the car door, still hovering over his phone, and buckled up without a word. It’s only after Karl locks the doors that Sapnap says something to him. “When’s your birthday?”

“The nineteenth this month,” Karl side eyes him. “Why?”

He shrugs. “Oh, you know. Just thinking about that party.”

“No, no, no, no.” Karl reaches across the armrest to reach for Sapnap’s phone, assuming he’s already set it up. Judging by how Sapnap is absolutely beaming, he is. He keeps his phone just out of reach to the point where Karl is about to fall over on top of him by losing his balance. “Unless you want to invite my mother on that holy day, I suggest something else.”

“How about the seventeenth, pretty boy?”

Karl chokes on air and falls on top of the armrest. He hides his face with his hands but makes no move to sit back. “Don’t call me that,” he mumbles into Sapnap’s lap.

“Fine, koukle mou,” Sapnap lowers his voice an octave and Karl just can’t. He squeezes his eyes shut and covers his ears with his hand. He really should get out of this compromising position. “So where’s the skate park?”

The change of topic lures Karl to sit up with a smile on his face. “It’s not a park. It’s something better.”

Once again Sapnap gets the aux and they drive. Although his queue doesn’t last very long when Karl pulls back into his driveway. Sapnap is visibly confused. “What? Why are we at your place?”

Before he answers, Karl gets out of the car and pulls the two skateboards out of the back seat. He opens Sapnap’s door for him.

“One thing you need to know about staying in a tourist town is that you can walk everywhere.” He offers Sapnap a hand and helps pull him out of the car. “And if you can walk everywhere, you can skateboard everywhere.”

It’s impossible not to notice the confusion still written all over Sapnap’s face. Karl smiles, hands him his skateboard, and takes off on his own before Sapnap can question it.

“Try to keep up!” He shouts over his shoulder.

Sapnap shakes himself out of his daze and throws his board onto the ground. He’s following Karl now, even though the shorter of the two is still falling a little behind. Lucky for him, however, Karl quickly comes upon a crosswalk and has to stop to wait for a red light.

Sapnap is right behind him, stepping off of his board to ask a question. “Karl, where are we going?”

The status light for the crosswalk turns green and Karl skates away. He risks a look over his shoulder to see Sapnap cursing under his breath and collecting himself quickly before following. The two continue on their chase through skating downtown and running up hills towards the peninsula. When they reach the coast, Karl takes a turn and skates behind the houses where a cement path divides public property and public beach. He stops right in front of a boardwalk leading away from a navy house he was only at fifteen minutes ago.

Before Karl can see if Sapnap kept up, Karl turns around just in time for him to nearly crash into the other. Sapnap is already off of his skateboard, but the forward momentum keeps him moving straight into Karl, who barely catches the two of them in time. He grabs Sapnap’s elbow with one hand and drops his board to catch the rest of Sapnap with the other.

“Sap, you okay?”

He nods, looking around to try and place himself on a map. “Karl, where the fuck are we?”

The sun is setting behind the wall of houses behind them. It’s not as pretty as it would be if it were setting over the water, but a beam of gold still passes through two houses and makes Sapnap absolutely glow. Only then does Karl remember that his eyes are definitely, one hundred percent, still beautifully hazel.

“Karl Jacobs, where am I?” Sapnap steps forward and grabs Karl’s arms. He’s not mad by any means. If Karl could place an emotion on how Sapnap looks it would be excitement or wonder. It takes a lot to stop staring at Sapnap and actually answer his question.

With only the lower half of his arm, seeing as the upper half was pinned to one spot, Karl points to the navy house he was watching out for earlier. “That’s your house.”

Sapnap’s jaw falls open and he starts walking towards the back of the house. Karl follows behind quietly with both skateboards in hand. He walks up the boardwalk and stays behind the gate Sapnap hops.

“Tada.” Karl smiles when Sapnap looks back at him.

“This really is my house,” he says to himself more than Karl. Karl nods, proud of himself and unable to form real words. Sapnap comes back to him by hopping the fence again. He takes Karl by both shoulders and looks him right in the eyes. “Show me how to get ice cream from here.”

Karl points over the fence towards the street. “We can actually take the street and find a place within two minutes. It’s popular but it’s close.”

With an open smile, Sapnap holds his hand out for his board again. When Karl gives it to him, he hops the fence and waits for Karl to follow. The two of them are on the street not a second later, skating towards Finshe’s. With a few left turns and a jog up a hill, Sapnap and Karl are waiting in line for ice cream.

“This is amazing,” Sap repeats for the tenth time. “Everything is so close here. You have to drive for a half-hour to get to the nearest grocery store in Texas.”

“Maybe you should move up here then,” Karl jokes. He loves that Sapnap doesn’t disagree.

They’re now the first ones in line. A window frees up and Sapnap steps up to order. Karl is left staring at the menu, not sure what in the world he’ll order. He only has about five dollars on him, but he hasn’t eaten dinner either. Sapnap is standing by him a second later and the woman scooping their ice cream is waiting.

“Do you know what you want?”

Karl shakes his head. He’s been here a thousand times over the past four years but suddenly he had to budget himself and it’s a whole new menu. “I only have four bucks on me.”

“Get whatever you want. I’ll cover it.”

It’s only after Karl decides on mint oreo with rainbow sprinkles that he realizes what Sapnap said. “Are you sugar daddying me?”

Sapnap shrugs with a mischievous smile playing on his lips. “That’s up to you, koukle mou.”

The woman gives them their ice cream and calls for the next patron.

“What does that even mean-” Karl gets cut off by Sapnap spotting the lighthouse down the street.

“Let’s eat our ice cream at the lighthouse.”

“Sapnap-”

“Please, koukle mou,” Sapnap begs. Karl hasn’t even seen dogs with puppy eyes like those.

“Fine, but you have to tell me what that means.” Karl drops his board to the ground and hops on it.

“I will.” Sapnap follows him down the hill and around the corner. He only finishes his thought when they’re off their skateboards and the wind isn’t blowing into their ears. “On your birthday.”

Karl doesn’t understand why he’s keeping this one around, because it obviously isn’t to please Alex who isn’t here. Sapnap sits down on a bench overlooking the ocean and pats the spot next to him as a nice reminder though.

The taller obliges and props his feet up on the seat. Their skateboards are tucked under the bench. Karl leans into Sapnap as he eats his ice cream and feels him shivering. He laughs internally. Texas boys can’t take a sea breeze it seems. Karl sets his ice cream down to pull his sweater over his head and hands it to Sapnap, who stares at it.

“It’s collateral for the hoodie you lent me the other day.” Sapnap takes it and shrugs it on. “You know, because of the whole flingless summer thing.”

Sapnap isn’t watching the moon anymore. Neither is Karl. He’s staring at his ice cream that’s melted into a puddle as the sun set. There wasn’t much left to make it worth it anyway.

“I think that’s bullshit.” The ice cream is less interesting now. “I don’t understand why. I’m going to respect it, don't confuse that but… summer is a time where you’re supposed to let go of all of the things you have to hold straight during the school year. Fuck it if you make mistakes. Everyone is going to ignore it in the fall. Unless you get pregnant… which I don’t think you will.”

Karl laughs into his ice cream soup. “Yeah. I’m definitely not getting pregnant.”

Dark hazel eyes are met with ice blue.

“Is it really a fling if you put a label on it?” Sapnap leans in, not to kiss but to simply get closer, and Karl shrugs him off gently, but the message is still there.

“It’s a fling if you don’t label it. It’s a fling if it’s forgotten. It’s one if you never love each other.” Suddenly Karl feels naked without his sweater paws while Sapnap keeps watching him.

“Why would anyone forget Karl Jacobs?”

That’s the question that makes Karl stand up from the bench and throw his ice cream away right next to it. He pulls his skateboard out from underneath.

“You said it yourself,” Karl answers defeatedly.

Why did he vow to himself that he’d stay single this summer? Why did Sapnap have to be so… so Sapnap with everything he does? Why did Sapnap have to be right?

“People forget everything in the fall, Sapnap.” Karl gets on his skateboard, not willing to look back at Sapnap while he says this. He knows he’ll look as defeated as Karl does now. “I should get going. My mom will be worried I’m out after dark.”

Chapter Text

Karl would notice that Chris is staring at him if he wasn’t staring out into the distance himself. Chandler and Jimmy are goofing off away from the two of them. Jimmy is filming a video for his new YouTube channel, something he swears is going to blow up one day. The chances of it are slim though. No one necessarily agrees with him, but Chandler is enthusiastic enough to be part of it.

The four of them are on top of a mountain. It’s the only hiking trail in town and they all climb it at the beginning of summer as a tradition. Karl is here, of course, but he’s not entirely sure he wants to be. He thinks he messed up something yesterday and he hasn’t been able to take his mind off of it.

“Karl?” It catches his attention away from the tree line. “What’s up with you?”

He looks over to the other boys, the ones who placed bets on his love life and deems them far away and loud enough to not hear his conversation with Chris.

“I think I messed up with him.”

Chris sits on the rock next to Karl. It makes him look shorter than he already is, but Karl can’t find the motivation to tease him about it. “What did you say?”

“I said that uh…” he bounces his knees and looks back out at the three. Karl can’t believe he’s still using Chris as his makeshift therapist. At this rate, he’ll need a real one soon. “I said that he’d just forget me.”

“Did you mean it?”

“I did, but I’m not sure I do now.” God this was so messed up. Karl knows he was just being overdramatic last night and everything he said sounded all emo and sad. He wishes he could go back just to change the wording of a few things, so Sapnap wouldn’t misinterpret it at all. “Chris, that was the last thing I said to him. I said it and walked away.”

Karl can’t decide if Chris's silence is what he needs or if it makes the whole feeling worse.

“You could just not fix it. You said it yourself that you want to stay single this summer.” Chris keeps going on. “Maybe he was just a chapter of your summer and you have to move on to the next one.” He looks over at whatever Jimmy and Chandler are doing. Karl follows and sees that they’re throwing rocks at each other. “Which unfortunately may be that.”

That gets a laugh out of Karl. It isn't like any Sapnap would. Karl’s stuck in this guy and he needs to get over it. He’s supposed to stay single this summer. Two weeks from now he’ll forget he even had feelings for him. Two weeks from now Jimmy and Chandler have lost the bet and Karl can do whatever he wants.

“I feel gross,” Karl groans and lays back across the rock. His insides are all spoiled mush and his head feels stuffed and his heart keeps doing this thing, but it’s not that happy pang. It’s something else, something sadder. Karl covers his face in his hands. “I told myself I wouldn’t do it so why do I feel like shit?”*

Chapter Text

Karl still can’t believe that he’s standing in front of this door. It was a miracle that Chris successfully convinced Karl to do this, although Karl wanted to from the beginning and just needed his friend’s encouragement. Even Jimmy and Chandler were excited for him when he came clean in the diner. They let up about him failing his challenge and just listened to Karl go on and on about a boy that wasn’t even his yet, or at all.

Still, Karl is standing in front of Sapnap’s front door even though Sap never answered him when he asked if it’s okay if he could come over. He’s here anyway. He can’t wait any longer to tell Sapnap what he needs to. Even if Sapnap isn’t home and it’s a total embarrassment, he needs to try.

So, he finds it in himself to ring the doorbell. It almost felt too formal, but the house was too big for anyone to be guaranteed to hear it. Karl waits the long moment out by watching himself scuff his shoes on the front steps. The door opens up a moment later, revealing an older man that definitely isn’t Sapnap but isn’t random either. With all the time the two of them have been spending together, Karl can see the resemblance in the man’s eyes and nose to know that he’s Sapnap’s dad.

“Hello, sir. I’m Sapnap’s friend. Is he home by chance?” Once again, an awkward moment is shared when he asks for Sapnap by his gamer tag. Karl doesn’t know Sapnap’s real name so it would have to do. Hopefully, Mr. Nap doesn’t think he’s crazy.

A smile breaks out on his face anyway. “Yes, Nick is home, Karl. He’s up in his room. It’s nice of you to stop by today. He could use a friend.” Sapnap’s dad steps aside and opens the door further for Karl to come in.

Karl rushes a quick, “Thank you!” before he practically runs through the house. He doesn’t take a moment to realize that Sapnap’s dad knew him by name immediately or the fact that Sapnap’s name was Nick and possibly by extension, Nicholas. Although, he did look like a Nicholas and it made perfect sense. Right now, Karl is focused on the fact that he’s this close to Sapnap and his dad said he needs a friend today so he probably feels like shit and it’s probably Karl’s fault because of what happened yesterday and Karl just needs to know how badly he fucked up.

This time he knocks on the door. It’s frantic and desperate, but so is everything else in the moment. Karl needs to make sure Sapnap is okay. He needs to make sure that Sapnap knows the truth.

The adrenaline is pumping through his veins and he can hear his heart beating in his head. Karl takes a few deep breaths in to try to calm himself while he’s waiting for Sapnap to answer.

He imagines Sapnap at his worst because he figures that he has to look better than that. In his imagination, Sapnap is exhausted and hasn’t slept at all because he was too busy crying all night. There are bags under his eyes and his face is red and blotchy too because he’s still crying, goddammit. Seeing Karl set the waterworks off again and before Karl gets anything out, he hugs Sapnap and comforts him, whispering in his ear that he didn’t mean any of it because he was wrong and stupid.

Karl’s imagination isn’t far from the truth. His stomach drops when Sapnap answers the door in the sweater Karl gave him last night. He’s not much better himself, wearing Sapnap’s sweatshirt and even the tee he borrowed underneath.

Sapnap doesn’t look like he’s been crying, but the man is tired. Whether or not this goes well or poorly, Karl is going to push through the embarrassment and make sure Sap gets the shut-eye he needs.*

Chapter Text

Karl doesn’t like how early the alarm goes off. He reaches through the tangles of sheets just to turn it off. Hopefully, they can afford to sleep in a bit longer. Karl still isn’t ready for Sapnap to leave today. He probably never will be.

Against Karl’s wish, Sapnap stirs beside him. He doesn’t make any efforts to remove his arms around Karl’s waist, but he is waking up.

“What time is it?” he mumbles into Karl’s neck. No clue, he is going to miss that morning voice.

Karl moves an arm to pet Sapnap’s hair. He leans over to kiss the top of his head. “It’s eight. Your alarm just went off but we don’t need to get up right away.”

Sapnap hums and pulls Karl closer. “You’re so good to me,” he whispers before placing a kiss right at the base of Karl’s neck. The gesture sends shivers down his spine that remind him he is not asleep, at least not now.

“Right now?” He questions, knowing Sapnap is still groggy from waking up moments ago. Either way, his boyfriend nods. “Until we have to leave,” he whispers against his skin.

Karl whines in agreement. His eyes are closed as Sapnap crosses the gap to meet their lips. Already, he’s desperate for every bit Karl can give him. Karl squeezes his eyes even more closed. It’s one of their last kisses after all.

Sapnap lowers his hand on Karl’s back to slide underneath his shirt and trace circles on his skin. In response, Karl wraps his fingers in Sapnap’s overgrown hair that he loves so dearly. He breaks apart the kiss to simply pull Sapnap closer to him. Their chests are flush together and Sapnap’s chin rests on his shoulder.

He shouldn’t cry. There’s no point in doing it and crying in front of Sapnap will just stress him out even more. Karl knows that Nick doesn’t want to go back to Texas by any means, with Karl and Alex being here in Maine and all of his other friends being online, but his father is leaving in a few days to go back to Chicago.

That will leave Karl in a state all alone with only one friend left within reach out of the five he had at the beginning of summer.

“Karl, are you okay?” Sapnap’s voice is a soft whisper against his ear. Karl barely manages to nod as tears brim his eyes, but Sapnap can already see through the facade and forces himself out of Karl’s grip to look him in the eyes. “Hey, hey, hey… remember what you said about flings? What are the three things that make it a fling?”

It doesn’t make sense why Sapnap wanted to remind him of this now, hours from his plane ride South.

“What was one of the three things you said makes a fling a fling?”

In between sniffles, Karl chokes his answer out, “Not labeling it.”

Sapnap nods, brushing hair from Karl’s face and placing a kiss on both of Karl’s wet cheeks. “We’ve labeled it right? I’m your boyfriend.”

“And I’m yours.” Karl’s voice cracked but neither of them paid no mind to it. His laughter barely fighting against the embarrassing moment with his tears.

It is true. They’d been dating for more than half the summer now, making it official only a week after they stopped ignoring their feelings for each other- Well after Karl stopped ignoring them. But two more things made it a fling.

“It’s a fling if… if you forget each other.”

Sapnap keeps peppering Karl’s face with kisses. “Who would forget you, koukle mou? We decided that we’ll call as much as we can and when we can’t call we’ll text.”

“And you’ll be here next summer.”

“And I’ll be here next summer and maybe during a few school breaks.” Sapnap never told Karl that he was thinking about spending school breaks in Maine. It’s a nice surprise and his heart certainly swells at the sentiment, but his doubt does more.

“Are you sure that’s realistic? It’s your senior year. I don’t want to take anything away from you….”

“Shh.” Sapnap presses a finger against Karl’s mouth before he gets a chance to vocalize his doubts anymore. “There’s one more thing. What is it?”

Suddenly Karl’s tears stop. Surely Sapnap couldn’t mean what Karl was thinking. He remembered everything from that night of the lighthouse and still regretted the things he said. It took three things to make a fling: you never label it, you forget about it when it’s over, and…

“No. You can’t mean…”

Karl fucked up so much this summer. He broke the one promise he made to himself and lost countless friends over a situation he couldn’t control. He is a hot mess in constant crisis and yet Sapnap’s about to…

“I love you, Karl Jacobs.”

It makes sense. Karl already knows it in a way. He knows it because he feels the same way about Sapnap and he knows he should say it back now before the only communication they have is between two screens thousands of miles away from each other.

“Nick…” Karl tries to get the words to come out. He wants to tell Sapnap before he leaves, he does, but the space between them remains empty. In defeat, Karl echoes Sapnap’s words from when they first woke up. “You’re so good to me.”

Sapnap’s eyes darken despite his smile still on display. Karl knows what he just did, and it’s enough to have him cry again, but it’s half past and the two of them promised to meet up with Alex before Sapnap left.

“We should get ready now,” he whispers to Sapnap before he pulls himself out of bed. He would’ve gifted his boyfriend a kiss just like he’s been doing for Karl all morning, but after what just happened, it seemed almost patronizing. But for the rest of the day, Karl promises to himself that he’ll show Sapnap he loves him in as many ways as he can even if he can’t manage to say the three words out loud.*

Chapter Text

Gaming Panda

Karl tries to make plans with the Beast Crew, but things fall through. Chandler and Jimmy make a bet about when Karl is finally going to give up being single this summer. He plays Minecraft with Alex and his friend, Sapnap instead. It turns out that Sapnap is in town with his dad for the summer and the three of them decide to get dinner together.

Pixel Fire

Karl picks up Sapnap and Alex and they read to the local diner. When he picks up Sapnap, Karl points out that his house is a party house. Sapnap promises to host one for him later in the summer. Karl ends up being really hot in the diner because he forgot to change his sweater before he left his house. Sapnap lends him a shirt he happens to have on him.

Marshmallow Star

Karl finally gets to hang out with the Beast Crew, minus Chris. The three of them have a daytime pit fire at Karl’s. Jimmy gets there early and talks to him about how awkward Karl has been acting the past few days. Karl brushes it off as nothing. Eventually, Chandler arrives with chocolate for s’mores and some snacks. Karl, regretfully, is still wearing the shirt Sapnap gave him and Chandler teases him for it, claiming that he’s already won the bet. Karl tries to play it off as a shirt he got from the thrift store and somehow gets away with it. Later that night, Karl reaches out to Chris and confesses that things this summer are already going wrong. The two of them discuss Karl’s possibly changing sexuality and his already developing feelings for Sapnap. The conversation makes Karl feel a little bit more confident with his emotions, but he still doesn’t want to get together with anyone this summer.

Soccer Roadtrip

Karl goes over Sapnap’s to play video games with him and Alex. Sapnap and Karl talk about the states they’re from, which happens to be Texas and North Carolina. They start debating about soccer and it leads to the two of them deciding to go on a day trip to Massachusetts. Alex is surprised by the sudden change in plans and backs out at the last minute, claiming that he needs to be home for dinner tonight.

Turtle Garage

Karl and Sapnap are on their way to Boston and Sapnap is singing the whole way there. Sapnap is shamelessly flirting while Karl is just trying to find a parking garage. With nothing better to do, the two of them go to the aquarium and Sapnap can’t stop watching the penguins. He’s fascinated by the penguins and then Karl teases him the rest of the day. Sapnap says Karl looks like a turtle because he’s so old. They end the day going to the bakery that Karl mentioned earlier.

Skate Pastry

Sapnap and Karl end up going back to the parking garage as the sun sets to eat their cupcakes there. Instead of eating in the car, they go up to the roof and watch the street below and the skyline. Eventually, Sapanp mentions something about skateboarding and Karl pulls out of the trunk. They compare tricks until Karl falls and nearly scrapes his elbow. Sapnap calls it there, saying that he shouldn’t be out long after dark or else his dad will be worried. Karl can almost see through the disguise and see that Sapnap just doesn’t want to see Karl hurt himself. Karl is in charge of the aux when they head back up to Maine for the night. The sun has already set and Sapnap is really sleepy, Karl notices. Despite his efforts not to, Sapnap falls asleep in Karl’s car. Karl decides to show Sap the suburbs another time and brings him straight home instead so he can get some proper sleep.

Heat Sandwich

Karl starts the day normally until Alex complains about the heat. He remembers that he and Sapnap bailed on playing video games with him the other day for Boston, so he invited two of them over for that and air conditioning. After deciding on the PS4, the boys play some games until Alex says that he doesn’t feel well, thinking it’s the heat sickness finally sinking in. Karl rushes his friend downstairs with Sapnap and they force water and ice packs on him. While Alex sleeps it off, Sapnap and Karl sit and talk in the dining room with nothing better to do. After Sapnap insists on telling Karl how pretty he is, Karl splits off from him, blushing and making lunch for the two of them.

Sweater Sunset

Karl is asked by Sapnap where good skate parks are around town, but Karl decides to take things into his own hands and show something to Sapnap himself. After he picks Sapnap up, he shows him the skate route between their houses. Sapnap is astounded and demands they get ice cream afterward. The two of them do so and watch the sunset from the lighthouse while they eat it. Sapnap asks what really counts as a summer fling, accidentally saying that everything is forgotten in the fall. Karl tells him it’s the fact that it’s forgotten in the fall that troubles him. He leaves before Sapnap can take back his words.

Mountain Bet

Karl is on top of the town mountain with the Beast Crew. Physically, he’s there, but he’s still going over all the regrets he made the other night with Sapnap. Chris picks up on the fact Karl isn’t really there while Jimmy and Chandler film a video for a channel that probably won’t go anywhere. Chris talks to him and eventually convinces Karl to talk to Sapnap and try to unfuck up their relationship. Afterward, the four of them go out for dinner at the Purple Cow, the only place they eat in this tiny town. Chandler continues to tease Karl about his love life. Without really answering, Karl just gives Chandler the fifty he has on him. Jimmy lights up and asks Karl about them. While Karl clears up that nothing has actually happened between them, he also talks about how amazing Sapnap is to him already. He points out that doesn’t want it to end at the end of summer either.

Confession Clothing

Karl tried to reach Sapnap before he came over after the diner, but didn’t get an answer. He knows he should just go home, but he’s desperate to finally explain to Sapnap how he actually feels. When he knocks on the front door, it isn’t Sapnap that opens. Karl assumes that it’s his dad and asks if Sapnap is home. The man explains to Karl that he’s upstairs by his name. He doesn’t know if the shock is from the fact that Sapnap’s dad knows Karl’s name or by the fact that Sapnap’s real name is Nick. Either way, he finds his way to Nick’s room and knocks a second time. Sapnap answers and he looks rough… and he’s wearing Karl’s sweater just like Karl wore Sapnap’s shirt the first few days after they met. That alone gets Karl to blurt out everything he’s thought about on the way there before Sapnap ever gets the chance to say anything. Karl didn’t mean anything he said at the lighthouse. He really likes Sapnap but he doesn’t know what to do about it because he promised himself that he’d be single this whole summer. He’s supposed to be demisexual but he’s never been attracted to someone like he is Sapnap before and it’s all confusing. But he wants this. He knows he wants this.

XIII

Sapnap is finally hosting the party he promised Karl. The two of them go about it platonically and it slightly upsets Karl, even though it’s exactly what he asked for. Vanessa is at the party and is a few drinks in when Karl and her see each other. She’s obviously drunk and tries to talk to Karl. She starts confessing her feelings and Karl politely lets her down. However, she keeps pressing it on and eventually corners Karl. Eventually, Vanessa throws her drink at Karl and Sapnap takes notice. He breaks up the confrontation, tells Vanessa to go fuck off, and sends Karl upstairs to take a breather. Karl changes out of his sweater and blames himself for the whole issue. Sapnap comes in later and talks Karl away from his negativity. Karl didn’t deserve any of that and Vanessa certainly doesn’t deserve him. They end up cuddling until Karl falls asleep

XIV

Karl wakes up confused about where he is and startles Sapnap awake when he realizes that they shared a bed last night. It takes a moment for Sapnap to calm him down and another for him to notice his headache. It takes Karl a while to wake up and Sapnap helps him. Karl texts Chris and asks for a ride but he never answers. Sapnap asks how Karl feels about last night and Karl just doesn’t answer. Sapnap and Karl end up going out to eat lunch together despite the miscommunication between the two. Karl leans his head on Sapnap’s shoulder while they’re at the restaurant to try and clear up Sapnap's confusion. They walk back to Karl’s which takes like twenty minutes. Karl points out the park and Sapnap drags him into it. Karl tells him about all the time he and Alex fucked around here. Eventually, the two of them climb a tree. Karl tells Sapnap that he’s really glad they met. Sapnap lets it slip that he’s really happy Alex introduced them. Not knowing what he meant, Karl makes him confess that he’s had a giant crush on Karl ever since Alex told him about him. Karl lets it be known that it was so obvious. They share a moment and Karl notices that Sapnap is looking him right in the eyes instead of straying to his lips like they used to. So, Karl throws his flingless summer into the garbage and kisses Sapnap.

XV

Chris, Chandler, and Jimmy all ignore Karl for about a week, leaving him confused and worried because no one has been answering his texts. Karl goes on his own, spending his time with Alex and Sapnap, although he does miss his other friends. Eventually, on a date with Sapnap to the Purple Cow, Karl runs into his friends that have been ignoring him. Karl feels awkward about it, but Sapnap encourages him to talk to them and see what’s wrong, because people don’t just ghost one another, especially as a group. When Karl does, they're all visibly mad about what happened at the part, but their version of what happened is much different than Karl's. Somehow the blame is shifted to Sapnap for throwing the first party in the first place. Chris gives Karl the ultimatum of them or Sapnap. Karl chooses Sapnap easily because the Chris he was friends with would never make him choose. Karl takes Sapnap and leaves the diner, going to have ice cream instead by the life house.

Summer Finale

Karl and Sapnap have been attached to the hip since Karl dealt with the drama with Chris, Jimmy, and Chandler. Jimmy still tries to talk to him, but Karl doesn’t get back to him much. Today is Sapnap’s last day in Maine. His flight leaves tonight. Karl has a day planned out as a last hurrah filled with Alex and skating and ice cream and possibly even finishing it off with that game of Mario Kart that they never played. Right now, Karl doesn’t want to get out of bed and neither does Sapnap. It finally settles in that Sapnap is leaving tonight for Karl, after many tears and a very well-thought-out pep talk, Sapnap tells Karl he loves him. Karl can’t manage to say it back.

Airplane Texts

Alex comes to the airport with Sapnap and Karl. Always the greatest father figure, Nick’s dad is stuck in a meeting and couldn’t make it to his son’s flight. Alex stays back while Karl says his final goodbye to Nick at his gate. Karl tries again to say “I love you” back, but the tears barely let him get out anything more than a gasp. Sapnap promises him that he knows what he’s trying to say because he’s more than proven it to him with what an amazing day the three of them had. Sapnap boards the plane after one final kiss goodbye. Karl and Alex stay and watch Sapnap’s plane take off and Karl pulls out his phone, texting his boyfriend “I love you”, knowing he’ll see it when he lands in Texas.

Chapter Text

After Karl confesses his feelings to Sapnap, but Sapnap doesn't understand that he no longer wants to be friends.

Sapnap doesn’t call Karl by anything but his name from then on. No “pretty boy” slips by accident and there’s no “gorgeous” placed after Sapnap asks Karl to pass him the salt at the Purple Cow. Sapnap never compliments his eyes like he was probably itching to do before. Karl shouldn’t be upset about that because it never happened, but the hurt is still growing there. Worst of all, Sapnap never calls him “koukle mou” anymore. Karl knows he should be happy with it. It’s what he asked when he asked to just be friends. Either way, Karl has never felt so ugly in his entire life.

The incident with Vanessa at Sapnap's party. It's mostly dialogue because it was written down hastily at two in the morning and never edited.

“I’ve been so obvious about my feelings for you, Karl! The least you could do is try back.” Veronica’s words slur together as Karl tries to find a way out, but he’s thoroughly backed into the corner.

“Veronica, I don’t like you like that. You’re- you’re my best friend’s sister. I would never do that to him.” His voice is smaller than he wants it to be, but at least he’s defending himself. A moment ago, Karl wasn’t able to find his voice.

“That’s bullshit, Karl! It doesn’t matter what Chris thinks.”

“Veronica-“

“Just give me a chance, Karl. That’s all I’m asking.” She’s crying now and Karl doesn’t know what to do. He didn’t ask for any of this. He was with Sapnap. Where was Sapnap-

Before he can finish his thought, his eyes are burning and his hair is pressed flat against his face and before he can’t wipe the drink off of his face, he can hear Veronica’s cup clatter to the floor. Oh god, where was Nick?

Footsteps stomp away and Karl is left in the corner. The crowd covers him again as he slides to the floor and lets the tears fall. He doesn’t know how long he’s sitting there until he can hear his voice being called again by a deeper and more comforting voice. “Karl?”

Sapnap is kneeling in front of him, gently pulling Karl’s hands away from his face. “What happened, koukle mou?”

“I-I- she couldn’t- she wouldn’t- listen- I tried- b-but-“

“Hey,” Sapnap gently hushes his sobs. “You’re having a hard time talking. Let’s get you cleaned up first.”

A short snip of a scene I planned to happen after Sapnap and Karl started dating. Its placement was unknown, so it wasn't included in the outline.

“I know you always insist on me being my own person, but could you… could you say it?” A wicked smile plays across Sapnap's face as he pulls Karl even closer to him. “Of course, koukle mou. Anything for you… because you’re mine.” Those words set Karl off.

This is all I had written of the epilogue I had planned for. I had no inspiration for other content to go into the epilogue, so it was scrapped.

“You never told me what it means.” Karl is hunched over a math sheet at his desk.

“What what means?” Sapnap’s voice echoes out of Karl’s phone and across his bedroom. Karl glances at the screen to see his partner’s brows drawn together in concentration.

He almost laughs at the fact that Nick has no idea what he’s talking about. “I’m not going to say it because I’ll butcher it. That pet name you call me all time.”

It’s Sapnap’s turn to laugh as he turns to the camera. “Koukle mou?”

Karl nods.

“It’s not a pet name. It’s a term of endearment.”

“You still haven’t told me what it means. You promised me when we met and now it’s the middle of November.”

His smile is brighter than Karl could have ever asked for.

“You got me there, koukle mou… It means 'my beauty' in Greek.”

Karl’s jaw drops open. “Are you telling me you were calling me pretty boy this whole time?!”

Proud of himself, Sapnap falls back onto his bed with his phone in his hand. “Yes, yes I did.”

“You should speak more Greek.” Karl’s cheeks are still red.