Work Text:
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Ex-pel-liar-mus 12x
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There lived a certain man
In Hogwarts long ago
He was tall and thin
In his eyes a dangerous glow
Most children looked at him
With terror and with fear
But to Dumbledore he was such a useful dear
He could preach 'bout Potions like a preacher
Full of ecstasy and fire
But he also was the kind of teacher
Students would despise
Chorus
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape
Friendly with the Evans babe
His love for her could never go on
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape
Dungeon bat with billowing cape
His heart was broken but he carried on
He ruled the Potions class
With sharp and biting wit
But not one who did not think
That he was a greasy git
He got his choices wrong
And his reputation screwed
But he was real great
With the Potions that he brewed
For Narcissa he'd never been a traitor
Though she'd heard the things he'd done
She believed him Draco's favourite teacher
Who would save her son
Chorus
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape
Killed his darling by mistake
He didn't know how to ever go on
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape
Did everything for Lily's sake
And even chose to protect Potter's son
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Interlude (spoken)
But as his mission progressed
And his value for Voldemort
Rose higher and higher
The demands to do something
About this outrageous man
Became louder and louder!
*
"This man's just got to go",
Bellatrix declared
But her sister heard this
And told her "don't you dare"
No doubt this Severus Snape
Was a really skillful spy
'Cause he managed to fool
The greatest wizard of all time
Then one night Lord Voldemort remembered
That he had the Elder Wand
"Come to me, my servant", he demanded
And he came and made no sound
Chorus
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape
Didn't know it was a trap
As he was standing before the Lord
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape,
Harry had to watch his shape
Although he knew he mustn't be heard
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape
Dumbledore's most useful mate
He didnt know Voldy wanted his head
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape,
Had no chances to escape
Nagini bit him 'til he was dead
Oh, those wizards....