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Diarmuid stared, then realized he was staring, then remembered the giant sunglasses Waver had made him wear probably hid the fact that he was staring, meaning ... he should still stop doing so. At once.
"At last," Archer said. "A sight worthy of my gaze."
Diarmuid would have challenged him on the spot, his Master's wishes be damned, except that (1) it would be hypocrisy and (2) the beach was far too crowded, which he assumed was why Rider had picked it for his latest 'meeting of kings' (never mind that Diarmuid made no claim to that title).
He said, "What," feeling like an idiot, a lad no older than Rider's Master.
Archer's smile was 100% mockery and 250% suggesting Archer pitied him, except not really, because mongrels were beneath Archer's contempt and so on. (Archer, Diarmuid had realized, had a distinctly ... unique way of looking at the world.) "I believe it is called a 'bathing suit'."
Saber looked perfectly comfortable wearing whatever it was called (Diarmuid reserved judgment until he'd gotten confirmation from someone slightly more down to Earth than Archer). Not that Diarmuid was sure one could be considered 'wearing' something that seemed to emphasize more than it concealed - or protected for that matter.
Of course, in case of trouble, she'd simply call in her armor.
"Your continued slobbering truly is unsightly. If you value your worthless life, I strongly urge you to stop at once and beg my forgiveness," Archer said.
Diarmuid decided that was more than enough. "I am Diarmuid Ua Duibhe, and I - "
"Magnificent, is she not?" Rider exclaimed, slapping Diarmuid's back with enough force to make him wince. (He noted Archer's dirty look at receiving similar treatment.)
"You - " Archer started, no doubt about to demand more groveling for imagined slights.
"Yes! Nothing like that smell! The sea truly is a most magnificent phenomenon," Rider declared.
"Not nearly so impressive as your utter stupidity and lack of vision," Archer said. He hadn't yet looked away from Saber, who happily seemed wholly unaware of the effect her appearance was having on the rest of them.
Rider laughed and slapped Archer's back again. (Diarmuid dodged, then wished Saber had seen, then wondered what was wrong with him.) "Ever the flatterer, aren't you, Archer?"
Archer sneered.
"Now, I am off to try this thing called 'ice cream' my Master has told me about. Would either of you like to join me? I've been told it is a rare treat indeed, sweet and cold and quite delicious."
Archer sneered some more.
Diarmuid felt compelled to be polite for both of them. "My thanks for your kind invitation, Rider, but I would prefer to remain here."
"And do what? Watch, as other people have all the fun? Do not tell me your are scared. I know the ocean may seem vast and mysterious, and indeed she may be an awesome force, but even so - " Rider stared down at his chest where Archer had punched him, his expression more surprised than hurt.
"You dare accuse me of cowardice? Me?"
Rider grinned. "A man who dares nothing is a man who is not truly alive. But come, no call to get your panties all in a bunch. I merely wished to indicate my understanding."
Archer sneered like he was competing in a contest, except that no one else seemed to be participating.
Diarmuid wondered if it would be less honorable to stay and risk staring at Saber some more, or to abandon her to Archer, who seemed to have no problem staring at all, and Rider, who did not seem to be even aware there was anything worth staring at.