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She was running through the dark streets of the city. The sun had vanished from the sky a long time ago and the moon was hidden by dark, imposing clouds, producing thick snowflakes which were threatening to bury her. She didn’t know where her feet were carrying her.
The environment went blurry before her eyes while she got lost in a sea of dark, uninviting houses and almost burned-out lanterns.
An uncomfortable feeling settled in her chest, stinging her even harder than the cold wind in her face or her freezing fingers.
According to the numb feeling in her face and fingers, it took her a rather long time until her feet stopped in front of the only illuminated house this late at night. Her frantic mind, replaying the events earlier this night over and over again, came to a screeching halt as her whole body was flooded with a short sense of familiarity and warmth chasing the painful stinging in her chest away.
Shaky fingers drew up to knock against the door, so weak it would be close to a miracle if someone could discern the sound in this stormy night. But after mere seconds, the lonely girl in the night could hear footsteps drawing closer to the door. A breath she didn’t know she was holding escaped her lungs as the door opened, revealing a large, burly man holding a half-burned candle in his hand on the other side. His eyes widened in confusion and concern as he made out who exactly knocked at his door in the dead of night.
“Anna! What are you doing here so late at night? Is everything ok-“ She didn’t let him finish as pressed herself flush against him, slinging arms around his back and burying her snow-covered head into his chest. A large calloused hand was put on her trembling back, attempting to draw soothing circles.
“Is everything okay at the castle? Did something happen with Elsa?” he mumbled into auburn hair.
At the mention of her name, the stinging feeling in her chest returned with full force. Her mind returned to the images she wanted to forget and instead of answering his question she slung her arms around his neck and smashed her lips into his.
The kiss was clumsy, fueled by desperation and the need to forget. To replace hurtful memories with the feeling of comfort she normally feels when she was with the Ice Harvester. The hand on her back has stopped moving and when she didn’t feel him reciprocate she grew more forceful, pushing her tongue past his lips, finding his own, and beginning a one-sided battle with it. Almost instantly his hands found her hips and pressed her shivering body even deeper into his.
Somewhere in the distance, she could make out the sound of the candleholder falling to the ground as his tongue began to fight back, rubbing against hers in a dance of passion. The open door was forgotten and the snow invading the house was not deemed important to care about or interrupt the desperate hold these two had on each other.
But as he buried his hand in her coat the princess didn’t feel his large hands, rough from all the tools he handled and repairs he had done. She felt soft, slender digits clutching her side. The hair she sank one of her hands into wasn’t its usual golden-blonde color, but instead, silky strands of long platinum, cascading between her fingers. Rough and choppy lips gave way to unbelievably soft ones.
With a heart-wrenching sob, she broke the kiss. Tears clouded her eyes and the sting inside her chest grew and grew until it was an unbearable burning threatening to eat her from the inside. Her crying was only interrupted by large coughs which expelled tiny snowflakes out of her mouth.
The arms around her hips disappeared and her unsteady hands tried to fight against the unrelenting stream of tears. When she lifted her head to explain the sudden loss of warmth and contact she didn’t recognize light brown eyes looking at her full of worry. Instead, she saw eyes blue like sapphires and deep as the ocean. Eyes that she lost herself into so often it would be ridiculous to attempt to count. Eyes that always could see past the happy mask she tried to hide behind so often.
Exactly these eyes looked at her in a mixture of panic and horror. She couldn’t make out the words that were directed at her. In her mind, she could only hear the last words her sister said to her.
“LEAVE! NOW!”
And she ran.
She ran through the maze of streets, familiar sights turned strange behind falling tears. Even the biting cold and snow couldn’t soothe the raging inferno in her chest. The thick white snowflakes falling to the ground danced alongside bright red and pink ones, produced by every biting cough that shook the entire body of the crying princess. Without knowing where, she ran away from the voice shouting her name, her mind mercilessly assaulting her with the very thing she ran away from in the first place. The moment everything fell apart.
It was easy. Way too easy. She was sitting beside her sister, trying to make her laugh with the stories of her shenanigans and antics during the day. A particularly loud snort from Elsa made Anna pause in the rambled retelling of her adventures and the princess just sat on her big sister’s bed, admiring the beautiful woman in front of her. Her nose was scrunched while she was laughing at Anna’s adventure to the castle’s kitchen and her hair, being free of the signature braid, freely fell down around her shoulders.
After a short time, the laughter of her sister subsided and Anna was greeted by stunning, deep blue eyes, looking at her with so much love and care. The fire in the room was crackling, bringing warmth and comfort to the entire room that was matched by the warm feeling traveling through Anna’s body. Concentrating on the warm feeling that was spreading from her chest to every part of her being Anna closed the space between her and Elsa like it was second nature. When her lips met incredible soft and slightly cold ones it was like nothing she ever experienced before.
Nothing in her life has made Anna feel this alive.
Her whole body was overflowing with love and admiration for her sister. Her sister was finally part of her life again. Fireworks and butterflies shared the space her stomach was supposed to be in and if she could she would never do anything else but kiss her sister.
But something was missing. It didn’t feel quite right to her. She slowly opened her eyes and saw Elsa sitting stiff as a statue, eyes opened in shock. As if opening her own eyes broke a spell Elsa began to move. She withdrew herself with the speed of someone running for their life until she was pressed flush against the opposite side of her bed. A thin layer of frost spread from her arms to the headboard and despite the fire still burning Anna felt a cold shiver running down her spine.
She searched her sister’s eyes and what she saw broke her heart in two.
Those beautiful eyes that normally shone bright with love whenever Anna found them in hers were now filled with horror and confusion.
The princess lifted a hand and slowly moved towards Elsa
“Els?”
Seeing the redhead scooting towards her made Elsa flinch and the sight shattered Anna’s already broken heart into a million little pieces.
Her hand dropped lifeless in the space between the two sisters. Tears began to form in Anna’s eyes, but she tried to hold her voice steady.
“Elsa, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“We’re sisters, Anna. Sisters cannot kiss like that,” Elsa practically shrieked, panic overtaking her features. The entire room grew significantly colder and while the fire struggled to survive a few tears made their way down Anna’s face.
“I’m sorry, Elsa. I-i don’t know what came over me, but it won-”
“You kissed me, Anna. Like a lover ! That’s not something we can just look past!” the Queen screamed in Anna’s face, her ice now sprouting jagged tendrils alongside the wall.
Paralyzed by this outburst Anna could do nothing but watch in painful silence how the panic on Elsa’s face slowly turned into a cold and distant demeanor. All emotion seemed to have left her eyes and they were fixed at a spot somewhere between them on the bed.
“It’s my fault. The constant isolation probably infected you with those wrong feelings for me. If I could have just been a normal sister to you, if you were safe around me then nothing like this would have ever happened.”
The words that left her sister’s mouths were barely above a whisper. It was directed more at herself than at Anna.
“No, please Elsa! I’m sorry, it was my mistake and it won’t happen again. Please, just please don’t feel guilty for my mistake. We – I can fix it, I promise.”
Tears were running down her face as she stumbled over her words, trying to get them all out. Deep within her chest, a sharp pain began to form.
The Queen just hugged herself and looked away, unable or unwilling to face her sister.
“Elsa, please talk to me. We can figure it out together.”
“I think you should leave no-“
“NO! You can’t lock me out again! I need you, Elsa. I can’t lose you again,” she begged her sister between strangled sobs as her chest felt like it was pierced by a thousand needles.
Elsa was still not looking at her younger sister.
“I love you, Elsa. I don’t – I can’t live without you!” Anna yelled between her cries.
Elsa snapped her head in the direction of the crying girl in her bed.
“LEAVE! NOW!”
At the same time as those words left her big sister’s mouth, a massive wall shot up between the sisters, splitting Elsa’s bed in two and trapping both of them on opposite sides. Shards of Ice and wood were raining down on the pair.
Anna looked at the wall in shock. An eternity seemed to pass in her mind until the words of her sister finally sank in. Desperate cries left her body as she banged her fists against the solid wall of ice separating the redhead from her sister. The skin at her knuckles cracked open, but Anna didn't care. She didn’t feel the pain in her hands or the growing sting in her chest. Anna became numb to everything but the overwhelming pain of losing her sister and even after she screamed herself hoarse, calling Elsa’s name out again and again, the wall still stood in her way. Mocking her like the door that haunted the better part of Anna’s childhood.
She couldn’t bear the sight of it anymore, so while she was being drowned with feelings of grief, loss, and overwhelming guilt she spun around on her heels and sprinted out the door. In her hurry, she couldn’t hear the quiet whimper that came from the other side of the room.
As her mind bombarded her with the events of the night past, the young princess didn’t notice that she stopped in front of the one place she would always find herself back at. When her eyes became focused enough to see somewhat clearly again she could make out the engravings on Elsa’s massive door, now locking her out once more.
The whole castle appeared deserted, servants already sleeping peacefully in their quarters and a cold wind haunted the hallways. Without conscious thought, her hand automatically went up to knock at the door, but before she made contact her whole body was plagued with a massive coughing attack.
Deep red snowflakes shot out of Anna’s mouth with every cough, floating around the entire hallway. They never quite touched the ground, being swept away in the breeze that was coming through the hallway. It looked like somebody went around and threw flower petals in the air.
She tried to bang on the door, but could only manage a weak knock until another coughing fit interrupted her and the redhead was convulsing with pain. Dark edges invaded her vision and even standing upright felt like a herculean task.
Anna wanted to scream through the door, bust it down and talk to her sister, but she only managed to whisper a silent plea that was lost in the darkness of the night.
Her trembling legs were unable to keep her upright any longer as she slid down with her back against the door, head in her hands strained with tears she didn’t know she still had in her.
Another violent cough shook her.
It was hard to stay awake, but it wouldn’t be the first time she camped outside Elsa’s door. With her vision almost gone now, the last thing she saw made her question if she was not already dreaming. It was like a scene described in a fairy tale.
All around her in the air were the most gorgeous-looking flowers, made out of pure ice. They were tinted a deep red and pink color, floating gently up and down all around her. The snowflakes were now dancing all around this crystalline garden while the little moonlight that broke through the clouds illuminated the flowers and cast the hallway in hues of red and pink.
It seemed like something not from this world.
"Just like Elsa’s magic." Anna thought to herself.
She held out her hand and one of the red ice flowers gently floated onto the open palm. The princess smiled to herself, taking this display of otherworldly beauty as a sign that there was still a chance to win her sister back. With that thought she closed her eyes, the flower slipping out of her hand and shattering into tiny little pieces.